“Go to your bathroom to freshen up, I’ll clean up in the hall bathroom and wait for you in the living room. I love you, Celia.” He kissed me one more time and patted my ass as I walked away.
Before he left that evening we made plans for the following day and the day after that. Everything finally felt like it coming together for us. There was the war of course and there was a chance that he may not come home, but there was finally a chance for us to be together. Although he wasn’t in the infantry, there was always a possibility something could happen to him - I just needed to push that out of my mind. I was so in love, a big part of me wanted to marry him before he left. At least I could say I was his wife. If we married before he left, I could even have a chance of having his baby, so I’d always have a piece of him- Jack wouldn’t here of it though.
“Celia, baby, I don’t want to say no to you for anything, but I can’t marry you before the war is over. I’m not making you a widow at 18. If by some miracle you do become pregnant, I would leave you to raise our baby by yourself, it would be harder for you to remarry. I’d leave my child fatherless the way I was left without a father. I can’t do that and I love you too much to do that to you.” He knew I was upset but he stood firm and I didn’t want to spend one moment of our three days arguing about anything. But then again, some things are just unavoidable.
On his last day, while we were spending our last few hours together, Camilla and one of her boyfriend’s ran into us at a local diner. In true form, she walked over hoping she could draw Jack’s attention away from me to give her ego a nice boost for the evening. When he failed to give her a second glance, she decided to see if she could start a fight between us.
“I’m surprised you two didn’t get married before Jack went back to Europe.” She had a wicked smile that suddenly made Jack very uncomfortable.
I didn’t understand why she cared, so I shrugged my shoulders and simply replied, “We’re getting married when he comes home. It’s for the best.”
Camilla’s smile grew larger and she nodded in agreement. “Of course it is. That’s what I told Jack two years ago when he left to England. He insisted we get married before he left and I told him, it was for the best if we waited. He must have come around to my way of thinking. You two have a nice evening.” Camilla could hardly contain her laughter as she strolled out of the diner.
Jack stared at me, waiting for me to say something but I needed to pretend like nothing had happened. I needed to keep control of my emotions until I was safe at home and could sort out all the hate being processed in my brain. There was no sense in acting on anything just yet.
“Celia? Are you okay? Can we talk about this?” He sounded incredibly remorseful, but I couldn’t engage. If I admitted my pain then it was all going to flood out like a tidal wave.
“There’s nothing to talk about Jack. Can you please take me home?” My heart ached as I struggled to hold in my tears.
“But I thought you wanted a dessert?” He kissed my hand and brought his head closer to mine. “Baby, we need to talk about this, it isn’t what you’re thinking.”
“You don’t know what I’m thinking, Jack. Please take me home. I don’t feel well.”
I sat quietly in the car on the way back to my parent’s house and tried to calm down. Did I really want to end things with him? He could explain all he wanted, the facts were the facts. He wanted to marry her more. He always loved her more. And I was an idiot. When we arrived, he took me into the den so we could talk.
“Celia, please don’t be angry with me and please don’t be hurt by what she said, it was different with her. I didn’t love her the way I love you. For one, I didn’t trust her and thought she’d be faithful to me if we were married. I didn’t love her the same way because I didn’t give it a second thought if I left her a widow. I’m so glad she said no, I should have never asked her. Marrying her would have been the worst mistake of my life.” He tried to kiss me, but I pulled away from him.
“I’m sorry, Jack, but I don’t believe you. I think I’m just a poor substitute for Camilla to you.” I turned away, not wanting to let him see me cry anymore. I’d given him enough tears.
“This was a big mistake. We were the worst mistake of my life and I’m not continuing with it any longer.”
He was stunned and reached for my arm as I walked away. “Please, baby, don’t do this. You mean the world to me— you’re not a substitute for anything or anyone. Celia, I love you. If City Hall was still open I’d marry you right now just to prove I’m ready. Please believe me, marrying you now would be the selfish thing to do and you deserve better. You can’t end this, you know we belong together.” He tried to hug me again but I wrangled out of his hold.
“I do deserve better, Jack. I deserve better than always playing second fiddle to someone like Camilla and if I were to marry you, I’ll always wonder if you really loved her more and just settled for me instead. I’m sorry, I’m not waiting for you. I’m not writing to you. I wish you well and I hope with all my heart you come home safely.” I broke free from his grasp and sprinted into my bedroom so I could cry in peace. A few minutes later I heard his voice through the door.
“I love you, Celia. I promise you, I love you and only you. I need to go back to the base tonight but I’ll write you from Europe. I don’t expect you to write back, but please know I’ll come back for you. If you don’t want to wait for me, I understand, but please don’t marry anyone else. Please don’t end us forever. I love you, baby.”
I thought I heard him choke up and I almost flew to the door, but I couldn’t. You can only feel like a fool so many times before you start to hate yourself and I was at that point. I hated myself. I despised myself and all the years I wasted loving him so much. The door needed to stay closed.
Chapter 5
Jack
I wrote Celia diligently the first six months, but all of my letters went unanswered. She’d written me regularly for two years during which time I answered all of her letters with a letter to her sister, but I gave up after six months. Celia was better than me, she was certainly better than Camilla, she was better than most people and if she wasn’t returning my letters it was because she genuinely didn’t want to be receiving them. I missed her desperately and I needed to find a way to fix things after the war. Despite what she said, I knew she loved me and I knew the kind of love I felt from her wouldn’t go away that easily. So when her father told me she’d become engaged to a First Lieutenant Evan James I didn’t want to believe it was true.
I didn’t know it at the time, but we were weeks from the end of the war. The Colonel and I were having dinner together in liberated Paris discussing his family, when he casually brought up plans for Celia and Evan’s wedding in early June. Evan had been injured earlier in the year and after he was sent home to Alexandria, he’d been able to get a head start courting her while I was still stuck fighting. I felt frantic. The Germans were losing, but they still hadn’t surrendered and if I didn’t go home before her wedding I would lose her forever. Luckily for the world and for me, the Nazis surrendered in April and after a few delays I was sent home in May. Celia was still upset with me.
Over a year had past- almost a year and a half, and she could hardly look at me. Upon my return, I visited her mother and tried to speak with her but she left the house in a rush and only said enough to welcome me home from the war. There was no affection in her tone and she refused to look into my eyes when she spoke to me. I honestly couldn’t tell if she was afraid of her feelings or she truly hated me. But until she spoke to me, I’d never know.
Through some mutual friends, I found out Evan had been carrying a torch for her for years. He seemed like a decent guy and if he wasn’t trying to marry my wife I might have liked him, but I couldn’t allow myself to develop a conscience about him. My objective was to bust up the engagement and do it as quickly as possible. Celia was mine and the more I followed her around, looking for the opportunity to speak to her and win her back, th
e more I knew I couldn’t live without her.
Chapter 6
CELIA
If he was trying to hide the fact that he was following me around, he was doing a terrible job of it. I couldn’t believe he served in military intelligence. His methods were a joke. As soon as Jack returned from Europe, I started seeing him everywhere. He’d be sitting in the café across my beauty salon or shopping in the stores across the street from me. I saw him at the grocery store and the gas station, he was everywhere. He couldn’t bother to write me one damn letter from overseas, but he could spend all day every day following me.
I was a week away from my wedding when he caught up with me at my parent’s house. He was conveniently dropping off some paperwork for my father at the exact same time I was scheduled to be alone in the house. He surprised me by coming into the house through the kitchen.
“Jack! What are you doing her?” I almost jumped, I was so startled.
“Your father asked me to drop off these files for him. He said the house would be empty. I’m sorry.” He stared at me long and hard, as if he were waiting for me to ask for more information.
“All right, I’ll be in my room. Do what you need to do.” As I walked away he caught up to me and placed his hand on my shoulder.
“Celia, can we please talk?” He was trying to appear calm.
“No, I’d rather not. It’s inappropriate. I’m about to be married and my fiancé wouldn’t want me having these types of conversations with other men.” I shook my shoulder to get his hand loose but he held on tighter.
“Celia, you can’t marry him. Why are you doing this? Why are you marrying him?” His expression looked pained and his eyes betrayed his vulnerability.
“Jack, there is nothing that is happening to you. I’m marrying Evan because I love him and he’s a good man. I’m sorry if you believe this is directed as some sort of hostile act towards you, it isn’t.” It was difficult to act so civilized in his presence. My heart was breaking standing so close to him.
“So you don’t love me anymore? You must have never truly loved me in the first place.” He barked angrily.
I shook my head slightly. “No, I guess I never did. It was just a school girl fantasy. It wasn’t real.” It was a struggle to get the words out. I knew I was lying and the shaking in my voice did nothing for my credibility.
“I don’t believe you!” He lifted me off the floor and pinned my back against the wall. When he covered my mouth with his, I surrendered completely. Can you believe that? Pathetic.
He dug his hands into my ass to hold me up and I raked my fingers through his hair, pulling it as I allowed him to devour me, overwhelmed by a passion I’d tried to suppress for the last 18 months.
“Baby, I love you so much. Tell me you love me.” His breath felt so warm and his lips were so soft, I almost gave in.
“No. I’m so mad at you.” Despite holding back, I continued to kiss him.
“You can’t marry him, you’ll ruin both our lives if you do.” His huge erection was digging into my crotch driving me crazy but I held firm.
“This is wrong, put me down, please.” I prayed he wouldn’t.
“Why couldn’t you wait a while longer? I can’t let you marry him, Celia. I can’t.” He buried his head into my neck and started crying. I would have been more sympathetic if I hadn’t been filled with rage.
“Why are you crying? You couldn’t even write me. You wrote Camilla for two years when she never wrote you once, but you couldn’t send me one damn letter after you swore you loved me more. Jacob Reed, put me down this instant before I scream!” I began thrashing about until he set me down, but when he did he stood back and stared at me bewildered.
“Celia, I wrote you twice a week for six months and you never answered me. After that I just sent letters for your birthday and Christmas. Are you telling me you didn’t get any?” He wiped his tears and a scowl grew over his face.
“No..I didn’t…” My stomach twisted as my heart instantly broke. I knew he wasn’t lying. The only explanation was Camilla. In a fit of rage, I ran into her room and overturned her mattress. There lying in front of both of us were all of Jack’s letter’s addressed to me, opened, read and hidden by my sister.
Gathering up all the letters in my arms, I sank to the floor and cried. I always knew my sister was a horrible person, but I couldn’t understand what she had to gain from hiding his letters. She never wanted him. She just didn’t want me to have him.
Jack sat down next to me and pulled me up into his lap.“I’m sorry she did this to you, baby. She did this to both of us. Please don’t marry him, Celia.” He gave me his handkerchief and helped me off the floor.
“I’m 8 days away from my wedding, Jack. I can’t just call it off now. I’m sorry.” I carried the letters to my room and tried to controlling my sobbing. Halfway there, Jack grabbed me and carried me the rest of the way.
“You’re not marrying him, Celia! I wouldn’t care if you were getting married tomorrow, you’re calling it off. If I have to be the one to go to Evan’s house to tell him you can’t marry him because you and I are in love, then I’ll do it.” He pushed open my bedroom door and locked it behind us.
Placing me on the bed, he pulled off my shoes and covered my body with his. Pinning me down with his weight, he pushed my thighs apart and lifted my dress to my waist. We kissed slowly at first, gently and methodically, but as he started to grind in to me, his mouth devoured mine. My heart was racing and I struggled to catch my breath in between our kisses. He pushed the top of my dress off my shoulders and pulled both my breasts out at the same time. Nuzzling his head between them, he licked my cleavage before latching on to one of my nipples and suckling hard. I cried out with desire as I felt him pull and tug on my sensitive bud, circling over the top with his tongue again and again before engulfing it all into his hot mouth.
“Jack, I love you. I don’t know what to do.” I couldn’t imagine finding the words to tell Evan I wouldn’t be marrying him after all.
He started unbuttoning his shirt, revealing his broad muscular chest and I sat up covering every part with kisses. The feel of his naked chest against mine made my whole body shiver with need. I was dying to feel more and he did not keep me waiting long. Separating my thighs underneath him, he reached down into my panties, slid his fingers through my soaked slit and then cupped my pussy hard.
“This is mine, Celia. I’m not letting anyone else have it.”
With an icy stare, he rose up to his knees and lifted my ass up, serving my pussy up to his greedy mouth. I was so aroused by the sight before me, I lost my mind with lust. Moments later, my entire body trembled with ecstasy from the incredible sensation of his tongue diving deep inside me.
“Jack! We shouldn’t be doing this. Oh Jesus, Jack, you’re going to make me cum.” I was in such an awkward position, but my hips still managed to rock against him as he strummed my clit with his tongue. I finally lost control and screamed in successive bursts while my pelvis convulsed and bucked wildly in the air.
Dropping my legs, he swiftly removed his pants, finally allowing me to see the full length of his body. Gazing at his cock for the first time, I sat up and crawled over to him.
“Baby, I need you, please.” He tried to get me to lie back down, but I shook my head.
“No, let me please you first. Please.” I reached for his cock and slid his shaft into my open mouth, letting him watch me slowly guide it down my throat. Jack grunted at the sight of me swallowing more than half of his dick, watching it glide down my tongue, until I wrapped my small hand around his thickness and began pumping. I sucked hard up and down, engulfing more and more until I could feel him getting harder and thicker. I loved the feeling of having his huge cock in my mouth, knowing it was finally mine after waiting for him for so long. I wanted to please him and let him know how much I loved him.
“Baby, that’s looks amazing, I’ve thought about this almost every day.” He guided my head back and forth until I could
feel him harden and jolt as he released a burst of warm cum down my throat. I cleaned him off, helping him get hard again, before he spread my thighs wide to enter me.
I watched him as he positioned his thick 9 inch cock at my entrance. We could have waited, but I needed him and he needed to be sure I’d stop the wedding. He teased my clit with his cock for a few seconds, making my ass flinch off the bed in anticipation, then let it slide up and down my slit.
“I love you so much, Celia. I don’t care how we do it, but we’re getting married next weekend, even if we have to elope.” He plunged the first few inches into me, stretching me open and making me cry out from the pain of his invasion. I pushed back on his abdomen, asking him to slow down, but he started rubbing my clit instead.
“I’m sorry baby, you just feel so good.”He pushed in deeper and made me yelp when he crashed into my hymen. Sympathetic but undeterred, he covered my whole body with his, lifted my legs to wrap around his waist and broke through, burying himself all the way inside me.
“Jack! You’re really hurting me.” I tried to push him off, but he held steady inside me and kissed me.
“You need to get used to me baby. This will feel so much better on our wedding night, Celia, I promise.” After another minute, he started thrusting slowly in and out of me. Letting me feel the friction of his cock stretching my walls and pushing against my cervix every time he forced his way back into my tight walls. As I moaned and and writhed with savage adrenaline, clutching at his arms, begging for more, he began to drive faster and deeper.
“Oh Jack, it feels so much better. You’re so deep, you feel so big.” My hips were rocking into his, meeting each of his thrusts halfway.
“Baby you’re fucking me back. Fuck, Celia, you’re going to make me cum baby.” He slowed his pace and tried to hold out for me. I could feel my pussy clenching on his cock, squeezing him and making my pelvis contract against his hips. Then suddenly, I gasped and began to wail loudly from the rapturous spasms of a mind-bending climax. As my body trembled in ecstasy, my hips jerked so wildly, I pushed his cock out of me. Unfazed, Jack immediately slammed it back into me, growling as he unloaded his cum deep inside me.
Love & Desire Page 2