by Kayla Carson
I sent Noah's mom, Angie a quick text to let her know I needed to reschedule again. She seemed OK with it, but by her short answer I knew that she wasn't. It wasn't until I received another text from her half an hour later that I understood why. She thought I was getting cold feet. I tried to reassure her the best that I could, and promised we would go tomorrow directly after work. I even told her she could pick me up if she wanted. It seemed to make her feel better, and it was the best that I could manage.
Five o'clock on the dot, and I was practically racing out of the station, and into the parking lot. I didn't want to chance anyone needing to speak to me. I had to get to Erin's. My nerves were all over the place the instant I pulled out of the station. I had been looking for answers for so long, could I actually find something? I drove in silence the entire way, turning on the radio never even occurred to me. When I finally pulled into Erin's driveway, I felt my heart sink into my stomach. I had never been so nervous in my entire life.
“It's about time bish.” Erin said, opening the door before I even had a chance to knock on it.
I glanced at my watch. “We only got out of work fifteen minutes ago.”
“I'm impatient!”
“Tell me something I don't know.”
“Ben has a birthmark on his left butt cheek.”
“What?” I laughed. “How in the hell would you know that?”
“We uh, kind of hooked up the other night.”
“You.. wait, what? But he's g-” I stopped myself mid sentence. Why would he tell me he was gay if he wasn't? Or maybe he was, and just didn't want the guys at work to know. He did seem insecure about it when he told me. But to use Erin in that way?
“He's what? Gorgeous? I know! And he's pretty damn good in bed too. Probably something I'll revisit in the near future.” She winked. “Anyway, back to business.”
I sat down at her dining room table, as she went to her bedroom to retrieve the lock box. I had a million questions racing through my mind, but the only person who could answer them was Ben. I made a mental note to have a discussion with him on our run tomorrow morning. He seemed like a nice enough guy, and using Erin wasn't OK, even if I did despise her half the time.
“Here it is.” She said, setting it down in front of me. “Nothing special about it, just your every day run of the mill lock box.”
I picked it up, feeling it's weight. “It's not very heavy.”
“I thought the same. Maybe it's filled with cash? Don't worry, if it is we'll split it sixty forty.”
“Can we just open the damn thing.” I said with annoyance.
“Alright James, don't get your panties in a twist.”
I bit my tongue, as I watched Erin work her magic. I had to admit it was a pretty neat trick to know. After she drilled the lock out, she took the flat head screw driver and turned it counter clockwise to disengage it. We heard a small click, and then we both smiled in unison. This was it. Taking a deep breath, I slowly lifted the box open. Pictures. A stack of at least twenty or so.
I reached in to pull them out, and began going through them one, by one. “This is Sarah Ryan.” I said to myself. “She was younger.. Erin look. Does she look pregnant here to you?” I asked, passing the image to Erin.
“Yeah she does.” Erin agreed, flipping the image over. “It just says the year. 1996”
“She went off the grid in 1997. Do you think that's when she had the baby?”
“Maybe? Are their any other photos of her during her pregnancy?”
“No, but there's this.” I said, passing her the image.
“She's holding a baby.” Erin said, with genuine surprise. “Sarah Ryan has a son.”
“Anything on the back?”
“Just a year, same as before. Only this one says 1997.”
“What do we know about that year?”
“Other than Sarah practically disappearing, not much. The angle of your father knowing Sarah was already looked at, right?”
“Of course. It was everyone's first thought since he entered her home without waiting for backup. Why do you ask?”
“Because something else happened in 1997.”
“What?”
“Your mom left.”
Chapter Ten
Two years ago when my dad died, I never even thought to try and contact my mother. She left dad, and I when I was two years old with no explanation. I remember waking up one morning, and she was just gone. I don't really remember missing her, and I know that seems cold, but my memories of her weren't happy ones. Dad was the one who spent time with me, read me stories, brushed my hair. So when she couldn't be bothered to show up at his funeral, I wasn't hurt. I wasn't surprised either, but now I have to ask myself why. Why wasn't she questioned? My dad couldn't tell us how or if he knew Sarah Ryan, but maybe my mother could have. Maybe she still can.
Noah was still asleep when I headed downstairs for my morning run, and I planned on telling him everything the second I returned. Ben was already waiting for me, greeting me with a soft smile when I reached him. “You look like you're in a good mood this morning.” I said, giving him a little nudge. “Something you want to share?”
He raised his brow in question. “I don't think so.”
“I need you to be real with me Ben.” I said, looking him directly in the eyes.
“Alright?” He said cautiously.
“Are you really gay? Or did you just say that to assuage Noah?”
“What's this about Haylee?” He asked, crossing his arms in defense.
“Erin.” I said blatantly.
His cheeks instantly heated, and he tried to turn away from my gaze. The first tell tale sign that someone was lying. “We ran into each other at a bar. We were pretty smashed, and the next thing I knew we were making out. I like her company, we have fun together. I still like men. I want a relationship with a man someday, but what Erin, and I did was just sex, and she knew that. We both did.”
“So.. you're what? Bisexual?”
“I mean.. pleasure, is pleasure.” He laughed, shrugging his shoulders. “Does that bother you?”
“No. I mean not in the way you think. I just don't want you to use Erin for some substitute, and then toss her aside when you find someone better.”
“And here I thought you hated each other.”
“We have a.. complicated relationship to say the least, but she's the only real friend I've ever had.”
“Well, you've got me now.” He winked. “Shall we?”
I nodded in agreement, before sidling up beside him to start our run. Maybe I was reading too much into the whole situation. They were both consenting adults, and if they wanted to blow off a little steam, who was I to judge?
When we finally made it back to our apartment complex, and back to our respective apartments, I was relieved. I had so much to tell Noah, and needed to use him as a sounding board. His opinion was the only one that really mattered anyway. When I entered the bedroom to hear the shower running, I smiled to myself. It had become a bit of a ritual for us to shower together, so I tossed off my sweaty clothing and slipped in behind him.
“Morning baby.” I said, running my hands over his strong back.
“Morning, Sugar.” He smiled back, as he turned to face me. “How was your run?”
“Oh, you know. Erin's sleeping with Ben, who I thought was strictly gay, but who turns out is actually bi.”
“What?” He laughed, pulling me into his warm embrace. “Sounds like a pretty crazy morning.”
“Brace yourself, because there's more.”
“What could be more shocking than Ben, and Erin hooking up?” He teased.
“How about the fact that Sarah Ryan has a son?”
Noah went slack jaw for a few seconds, before letting me know that I should continue. I filled him in on everything from Erin stealing the evidence, to what we found in the lock box. I saved the bit about my mother for last, knowing that he would be reluctant when he heard what I wanted to do. When I told him absolut
ely everything, we exited the shower together. It wasn't until I was dressed, and ready for work that I finally grew the courage that I needed to.
Sitting down beside him on the end of the bed, I turned to face him. “I want to find my mother.” I said quietly.
He reached for my hands, and held them in his. “Why now?”
I stood, pacing the floor in front of him. “Like I said. 1997. My mom left in 97, and Sarah Ryan had a baby in 97. My dad was killed in Sarah's house. The only person who would know if my dad knew Sarah, is my mother.”
“She's been gone for twenty two years Hales.”
“He never looked you know.” I said in a haunted voice. “When I got older, he asked if I wanted him to, but I said no. She chose to leave us. I don't want anything from her, other than to know what she knows about my dad. He raised me. He loved me. And now, he's gone. I don't need her to be a parent. I just need answers.”
“And, what if she doesn't have any? Or worse yet, what if she won't give them to you?”
“I have to try Noah. We have no other leads to go on. We have no way of finding Sarah Ryan's son. There are no names on any of the photos, and no images of the baby's face. We all thought she had no one. So where was this baby born? Someone went through a lot of trouble to hide her, and her child. Why?”
“You think your mom knows?”
“Maybe? Maybe not, but it's the only lead that no one thought to follow.”
“How are you going to find her? You can't use police resources without raising a red flag with the chief.”
“Ben.”
“I don't follow?”
“He's already assigned to the case. If I can convince him that my mom is some kind of angle, he can run it by the chief. He can make it seem like his idea, and leave me in the dark, only when he finds her.. instead of telling chief Craig, he tells me.”
“There are a lot of ifs, and maybes in this plan, Sugar. Who's to say you can even trust Ben?”
“He's my friend Noah, and I can't ask Erin to risk her job. Ben's the only one who can do this.”
“Alright, but don't tell him why. Feed him some sob story about wanting to find your mom so she can come to our wedding. He'll be more likely to lie to the chief if he thinks he's genuinely helping a friend.”
“Have I ever told you how sexy you are when you're being all sneaky, and manipulative?” I asked, placing my hands on his chest.
“Those aren't the most endearing traits, Sugar.” He laughed, reaching for my waist to lift me onto the kitchen counter. “It's a shame you have to get to work.”
“I've got a few minutes to spare.” I said, smiling against his lips.
“I can work with that.” He smiled back, before devouring my lips with his.
“I'm going to be late for work.” I breathed out, when we finally came up for air. “It's Friday. That means we have the whole weekend to continue... this.” I hinted, before giving him another quick kiss. “I love you.”
“I love you too, Sugar.” He said, resting his forehead on mine. “Have fun dress shopping with my mom today.”
“She told you?” I asked with surprise.
“She was pretty worried you were going to pull a runaway bride on me. I had to talk her off the ledge. Do NOT, I repeat do NOT reschedule on her again. Please.” He mock begged.
“Don't worry I won't. I'm actually kind of excited.”
“Really?” He asked arching a brow skeptically. “You're excited to try on dresses? You? The woman whose idea of dressing up is a pair of jeans without rips?”
“Quit teasing me.” I said swatting his chest, and giving him a fake pout. “Keep it up, and I'll marry you in my favorite pair, and a leather jacket.”
“As long as you marry me Sugar, you can walk down the aisle in whatever the hell you want.”
“Ugh!” I said grabbing his face between my hands. “Stop making me want to rip your clothes off, you gorgeous man! I have to go to work!” I gave him a little shove, and jumped down from the counter then. “Love you bye!” I yelled as I bee lined for the door barely escaping his reach. The smile I wore was still on my face when I made it down to the parking lot.
“Someone had a good morning.” Ben said, as he passed me to get to his car.
My cheeks heated, and I looked down. “I'm finally going dress shopping today.” I said, trying to change the subject.
“Can I come?”
My head snapped up then. “What? Why would you want to come dress shopping with Noah's mom, and I?” I laughed.
“Hello? Gay friend here!” He said waving dramatically. “I could help you!”
“You mean Bi friend?” I corrected him.
“Tomato, Tomahto. I can tell you if it makes your ass look big, and also if you look sexy as fuck. Win, win.”
I thought about it for a second. Sure, it would be awkward having Ben there while I'm trying on wedding dresses, but I could also use the time to my advantage. It would be the perfect time to bring up my mom, and pull on his heart strings. It might even make it easier to convince him to help me find her. “Alright.”
“Really?” He asked excitedly. “What's the catch?”
“Erin will probably tag along to annoy me. You're on decoy duty.”
“I'm in.”
Chapter Eleven
I rode with Noah's mom to the dress shop, while Erin, and Ben followed in her car. I kept glancing at the two of them in the rear view mirror, wondering what they were laughing, and smiling about.
“Did you hear me Haylee?” Noah's mom, Angie asked.
“I'm sorry, no I didn't.” I replied, turning to face her so I wouldn't be distracted any further.
“I said, I'm glad that I get to do this with you.”
“Thanks Angie, I'm glad too.”
She smiled to herself, before pulling into the back parking lot of the shop. Apparently there was a special entrance for appointments. I really didn't do fancy, so I hoped like hell that this place had something a little more my style. Taking a deep breath I unfastened my seat belt, and waited for Ben, and Erin to park beside us. When we reached the door, Ben held it open for us, and we filed inside. Angie spoke to a woman upon entry, and she quickly ushered us into our own room.
“Which one of you is the bride?” A beautiful blonde asked, as she entered excitedly.
I raised my hand rather shyly, and she gave me a once over. I could tell by the look on her face that she was sizing me up, judging me. I went to school with girls like her. The ones who always had the perfect pony tail, and bright pink toes and fingers. She was flawless.
“My name is Maryann, and I'll be your consultant today. First things first, what's your name sweetheart?”
“Haylee.” I said with a forced smile.
“Wonderful Haylee! Do you have anything in mind? Any specific cuts, or lengths? Beads, sequins? If you want it I'll make it happen, as long as it's within budget of course. What is the budget, if you don't mind me asking?”
“Uh-” I started, but Angie placed her hand on my leg stopping me.
“No budget.” She interrupted. “My only son is getting married, and his bride to be is worth every penny.”
“Angie, can I talk to you for a moment? In private?”
“Y'all can use the dressing room to your right.” Maryann helpfully butted in.
“Thank you.” I said, as Angie and I stood together.
After securing the door shut behind us, I turned to face my future mother in law. “Angie, while I appreciate the offer I can't accept it. Noah, and I have already talked about it, and set our own budget. The bride's father usually handles these kinds of things, and I wouldn't feel right asking you to-”
“Let me stop you right there Haylee James.” She interrupted once again. “I have known you for eight years, and loved you as a daughter for the past two. I don't want you and Noah to worry about money. Use what you've saved to go on your honeymoon. Let me do this for you, for the both of you. Please.” She said softly.
I
sighed, pulling her into a warm hug. “Thank you.” I whispered.
“You're welcome.” She whispered back, before pulling away. “Now, can we please start getting you into some gowns!”
I laughed, nodding my head and we returned to the others. Once again Maryann asked about my style, and if I had anything in mind. The truth was, I didn't. “I know this is a little unorthodox-ed, but I have an idea.” I said, biting my bottom lip.
Maryann's ears literally perked up, and I had to try and stifle my laughter. “If you guys don't mind.. could you each pick something out for me to try?”
Ben was the first on his feet. “On it!” He said, and before anyone else could speak he was making a mad dash for the racks. I couldn't help but laugh, as I watched Angie, and Erin try and catch up with him.
“What about you?” Maryann asked. “Aren't you going to chose something?”
“I know I'll probably regret saying this Maryann, but I absolutely hate dresses.”
Instead of cringing, her eyes lit up. “Please go wait in the dressing room.”
“What about-”
“Don't worry about them, they'll be a while. Besides, this is for your day. Trust me, this is what I do Haylee.”
Throwing my hands up in defeat I did as she asked, and plopped down onto the soft lounge chair in the dressing room, while I watched her disappear down a long hall. I pulled my phone from my pocket and sent Noah a quick text. This is torture.
It cant be that bad.
I asked them to pick dresses for me, also my 'consultant' seems to be made of sugar, spice, and everything nice.
LOL you'll be fine Sugar. We can always elope...
Promise?
Promise.
When I noticed Maryann walking towards me, I put my phone away and gave her a soft smile. “I see you've found something.” I said skeptically.
She laughed, placing the garment bag on the hook. “I think that you'll be pleasantly surprised by this one.” She added, before shutting us both into the dressing room together. “Ready?”