by Sue Grafton
It wasn't his age so much as his aura of formality. I couldn't find a way to reconcile his respectability with his (alleged) sexual proclivities. He'd probably been married to Serena's mother for fifty years or more. This all must have happened before Mrs. Esselmann died.
I made a six-block detour to Short's Drugs, where I purchased four eight-by-ten picture frames to replace the broken frames I'd brought with me from Danielle's. Lorna and Clark Esselmann, what an odd combination. The drugstore seemed filled with the same conflicting images: arthritis remedies and condoms, bedpans and birth control. While I was at it, I picked up a couple of packs of index cards, and then I went back to my place, trying to think about something else.
I parked, flipped the driver's seat forward, and hauled the banker's box full of Lorna's papers from under Danielle's blood-spattered bedclothes. For someone obsessive about the tidiness in my apartment, I seem to have no compunction at all about the state of my car. I piled my purchases on the box and anchored the load with my chin while I let myself in.
I settled in at my desk. I hadn't transcribed and consolidated my notes since the second day I was on the job, and the index cards I'd filled then seemed both scanty and inept. Information accumulates and compounds, layer upon layer, each affecting perception. Using my notebook, my calendar, gas slips, receipts, and plane ticket, I began to reconstruct the events between Tuesday and today, detailing my interviews with Lorna's boss, Roger Bonney, Joseph Ayers and Russell Turpin up in San Francisco, Trinny, Serena, Clark Esselmann, and the (alleged) attorney in the limo. Now I had to add Danielle's contention about Lorna's involvement with Clark Esselmann. That one I'd have to check out if I could figure out how. I could hardly ask Serena.
Actually, it cheered me to see how much ground I'd covered. In five days I'd constructed a fairly comprehensive picture of Lorna's lifestyle. I found myself getting absorbed in my recollections. As fast as I filled cards, I'd tack them on the board, a hodgepodge of miscellaneous facts and impressions. It was when I went back through Lorna's finances, transferring data from the schedule of assets, that I caught something I'd missed. Tucked into the file with her stock certificates was the itemized list of the jewelry she'd insured. There were four pieces listed – a necklace of matched garnets, a matching garnet bracelet, a pair of earrings, and a diamond watch – the appraised value totaling twenty-eight thousand dollars. The earrings were described as graduated stones, one-half – to one-carat diamonds, set in double hoops. I'd seen them before, only Berlyn had been wearing them, and I'd assumed they were rhinestones. I checked the time. It was nearly eleven, and I was startled to discover I'd been working for almost two hours. I picked up the phone and called the Keplers' house, hoping it wasn't too late. Mace answered. What a dick. I hated talking to him. I could hear some kind of televised sporting event blasting away in the background. Probably a prizefight, from the sound of the crowd. I stuck a finger up one nostril to disguise my voice. "Hi, Mr. Kepler, is Berlyn there, please?"
"Who's this?
"Marcy. I'm a friend. I was over there last week."
"Yeah, well, she's out. Her and Trinny both."
"You know where she's at? We were supposed to meet up, but I forgot where she said."
"What'd you say your name was?"
"Marcy. Is she over at the Palace?"
There was an ominous silence from him while in the background someone was really getting pounded. "I'll tell you this, Marcy, she better not be over there. She's over at the Palace, she's in big trouble with her dad. Is that where she said to meet?"
"Uh, no." But I was willing to bet money that's where she was. I hung up. I pushed the paperwork aside, shrugged into my jacket, and found my bag, pausing only long enough to run a comb through my hair.
When I opened my front door, a man was standing just outside.
I leapt back, shrieking, before I saw who it was. "Shit J.D.! What are you doing out here? You scared the hell out of me!"
He'd jumped, too, about the same time I had, and he now sagged against the door frame. "Well, damn. You scared me, I was all set to knock when you came flying out." He had a hand to his chest. "Hang on. My heart's pounding. Sorry if I scared you. I know I should have called. I just took a chance you'd be here."
"How'd you find out where I live?"
"You gave Leda this card and wrote it right here on the back. You mind if I come in?"
"All right, if you can keep it brief," I said. "I was on my way out. I've got something to take care of." I moved back from the door and watched him edge his way in. I don't like the idea of just anyone waltzing through my place. If I hadn't had some questions for him, I might have left him on the doorstep. His outfit looked like the one I'd seen him in before, but then again, so did mine. Both of us wore faded jeans and blue denim jackets. He still sported cowboy boots to my running shoes. I closed the door behind him and moved to the kitchen counter, hoping to keep him away from my desk.
Like most people who see my apartment for the first time, he looked around with interest. "Pretty slick," he said.
I indicated a stool, sneaking a look at my watch. "Have a seat."
"This is okay. I can't stay long anyway."
"I'd offer you something, but about all I've got is uncooked pasta. You like rotelli, by any chance?"
"Don't worry about it. I'm fine," he said.
I perched on one stool and left the other for him, in case he changed his mind. He seemed ill at ease, standing there with both hands stuck in the back pockets of his jeans. His gaze would hit mine and then flicker off. The light in my living room wasn't as kind to his face as the light in his own kitchen. Or maybe the unfamiliar surroundings had created new lines of tension.
I got tired of waiting to hear what he had to say. "Can I help you with something?"
"Yeah, well, Leda said you stopped by. I got home around seven, and she's pretty upset."
"Really," I said, giving it no inflection. "I wonder why."
"It's this business about the tape. She'd like to have it back, if you don't mind."
"I don't mind a bit." I moved over to the desk and removed it from the manila envelope Hector had tucked it in. I passed it over to J.D., and he put it in his jacket pocket without really looking at it.
"You have a chance to listen?" he asked. He was being way too casual.
"Briefly. What about you?"
"Well, I know pretty much what's in it. I mean, I knew what she was doing."
I said, "Ah," with a noncommittal nod. Inside, a little voice was going, Wow, what's this about? This is interesting. "Why was she upset?"
"I guess because she doesn't want the police to find out."
"I told her I wouldn't take it to them."
"She's not very trusting. You know, she's kind of insecure."
"That much I get, J.D.," I said. "I'm just wondering what's got her so uneasy she'd send you all the way over here."
"She's not uneasy. She doesn't want you thinking it was me." He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, smiling with embarrassment, using his very best "aw, shucks" routine. "Didn't want you puttin' the hairy eyeball on me. Scrutinizing." If there'd been a little dirt on the floor, he'd have stubbed the toe of his boot in it.
"I scrutinize everyone. It's nothing personal," I said. "In fact, since you're here, I have a question for you."
"Hey, you go right ahead. I got nothing to hide."
"Someone mentioned you went into Lorna's cabin before the cops showed up."
He frowned. "Somebody said that? Wonder who?"
"I don't think it's any secret. Serena Bonney," I said.
He nodded. "Well. That's right. See, I knew Leda'd put the mike in there. I knew about the tape, and I didn't want the cops to spot it, so what I did, I opened the door, leaned down, and clipped the mike off the wire. I wasn't even in there a minute, which is why I never thought to mention it."
"Did Lorna know she was being taped?"
"I never said anything. Tell you the truth, I w
as embarrassed by Leda's behavior. You know, by her attitude. She treated Lorna kind of snippy. She's young and immature, and Lorna's already giving me a hard time about her. It I told her Leda was spying on us, she'd have either laughed her butt off or gotten pissed, and I didn't think it would help their relationship."
"They had a bad relationship?"
"Well, no. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't that good."
"Leda was jealous," I suggested.
"She might have been a little jealous, I guess."
"So what are you here to tell me? That really everything's all right between you and Leda, and neither one of you had any reason to want Lorna out of the way, right?"
"It's the truth. I know you think somehow I had something to do with Lorna's death...."
"How could I think that? You told me you were out of town."
"That's right. And she was, too. I was set to go fishing with my brother-in-law, and at the last minute she decided to go up to Santa Maria with me while I picked him up. Said she'd rather hang out with her sister than stay here by herself."
"Why are you repeating all this stuff? I don't get it."
"Because you act like you don't believe us."
"Gosh, J.D., how could I fail to believe you when you provide such nice alibis for each other?"
"It's not an alibi. Now, goddamn it. How can it be an alibi when all I'm doing is telling you where we were?"
"Whose vehicle did you take to go to Lake Nacimiento?"
He hesitated. "My brother-in-law has a truck. We took that."
"Santa Maria's an hour away. How do you know Leda didn't drive back in your car?"
"I don't for sure, but you could ask her sister. She'd tell you."
"Right."
"No, she would."
"Oh, come on. If you'd lie for Leda, why wouldn't her sister lie, too?"
"Somebody else must have seen her on Saturday. I think she said they had a makeup party that morning. You know, where some cosmetic saleslady comes and does facials on everyone so they'll buy Mary Jane products or whatever it is. You don't have to get mad."
"Mary Kay. But you're right. I shouldn't get mad. I told Leda I'd verify all of this. I haven't had a chance to do it, so it's my fault, not yours."
"Now see? I don't know how you do that. Even when you apologize, you make it sound like you don't mean it. Why are you being so cranky with me?"
"J.D., I'm cranky because I'm in a hurry and I don't understand what you're up to."
"I'm not up to anything. I just came to get the tape. I thought while I was here, I'd... you know, discuss it. Anyway, you're the one that asked me. I didn't volunteer. Now it seems like I made it worse."
"Okay. I accept that. Let's let it go at that. Otherwise we'll be standing around all night explaining ourselves to one another."
"Okay. As long as you're not mad."
"Not a bit."
"And you believe me."
"I never said that. I said I accept it."
"Oh. Well, okay, then. I guess that's okay."
I could feel my eyes begin to cross.
It was twenty after eleven when I pushed my way through the crowd at Neptune's Palace. The illusion of the ocean depths was profound that night. Watery blue lights shaded down to black. A pattern of light played across the dance floor like the shimmer at the bottom of a pool. I raised my gaze to the ceiling, where a storm at sea was being projected. Lightning forked in a faux sky, and an unseen wind whipped across the ocean's surface. I could hear the cracking of the ship's timbers as the rain lashed the mast, the screams of drowning men set against a rock-and-roll backdrop.
Dancers swayed back and forth, their arms undulating in the smoke-heavy air. The music was so loud, it was almost like no sound, like silence, in the same way that black is every color intensified into nothing.
I found a perch at the bar and bought myself a beer while I scanned the crowd. The boys wore mascara and black lipstick while the girls sported punk haircuts and elaborate tattoos. I kept my gaze carefully averted. The music stopped abruptly, and the dance floor began to clear. I caught a glimpse of a familiar blond head I could have sworn was Berlyn's. She disappeared from view. I eased off the bar stool and circled to the right, peering over the roiling mob to the point where I thought I'd seen her. She was nowhere in sight, but I didn't think I was mistaken.
I lingered near a massive saltwater tank where a flat eel with vicious teeth was devouring a hapless fish. Suddenly I spotted her, sitting at a table with a beefy guy in a tank top, fatigue pants, and heavy army boots. His head had been shaved bald, but his shoulders and forearms were still thick with fur. Any body part not covered with hair seemed to be adorned with some kind of tattoo, dragons and snakes. I could see the ridges in his skull and rolls of flesh along his neck. I've often thought of fat backs as the portion of the human body that aliens would most prefer to eat.
Berlyn sat in profile. She'd shrugged off her leather jacket, which was now hanging over the back of her chair, anchored by her shoulder bag. She was wearing the earrings, two diamond-encrusted hoops dangling down on either side. Her skirt was green satin and, like her black one, short and tight. While she talked, she made frequent reference to the earrings, touching first one and then the other, reassuring herself that both were still in place. She seemed self-conscious, perhaps unaccustomed to wearing such ornate jewelry. The light from the candle in the middle of her table caught the myriad facets of the stones.
Booming music broke the air, and the two got up to dance again. Berlyn wore the same high, spiky heels, perhaps in hopes of lending grace to ankles that were otherwise as shapeless as porch posts. She had a butt on her like a loaded backpack tied around her waist. The table next to theirs had emptied, and I slid onto the chair next to hers.
Trinny suddenly appeared to my right. I'd have avoided the contact, but I knew she'd already spotted me.
"Hi, Trinny. How're you? I didn't know you came here."
"Everybody comes here. This is hot." She was glancing around as she spoke, snapping her fingers while she did some kind of chin thrust in time to the music. I wondered if this was mating behavior.
"You here by yourself?"
"Nuh-uhn, I came with Berl. She has a boyfriend she meets here because Daddy dudn't like him."
"Really, Berlyn's here, too? Where'd she go?"
"Right out on the dance floor. She was sitting right here."
She pointed in the general direction of the dance floor, and I peered dutifully. Berlyn was doing a bump-and-grind number with the beefy boyfriend. I could see his shaved head towering above the other heads bobbing on the dance floor.
"That's the guy your dad dudn't like? I can't imagine."
Trinny shrugged. "It's his hair, I think. Daddy's kind of conservative. He doesn't think guys should shave their heads."
"Yeah, but what difference could it make when he's got so much hair everywhere else?" I said.
Trinny made a face. "I don't like guys with hairy backs."
"Nice earrings Berlyn's wearing. Where'd she get 'em? I wouldn't mind a pair of those myself."
"They're just rhinestones."
"Rhinestones? That's cool. They look like real diamonds from here, don't you think?"
"Oh, right. Like she's really going to wear diamonds."
"Maybe she got 'em at one of those stores that sells look-alike jewels. You know, emeralds and rubies and like that. I look at that stuff and I can't tell the difference."
"Yeah, maybe."
I looked up. A fellow doing chin thrusts and a lot of finger popping was standing near Trinny's chair. She got up and started bumping and grinding on the spot. I waved at the air, trying to watch the dance floor around their flailing arms. "Do you mind?"
The two of them began to bebop in the direction of the dance floor. I found Berlyn again with her beau. I kept my eyes pinned on their heads bobbing on the dance floor. I leaned over as if to tie my shoe and slid my hand down into her purse. I felt her wallet, cosmetic bag, h
airbrush. I sat up again and then simply extracted the handbag from the back of the chair where she'd hung it, leaving mine in its place. I hefted the strap across one shoulder and moved off to the ladies' room.
There were five or six women at the basins, makeup paraphernalia scattered across the shelving provided. All were engaged in a frenzy of hair ratting, blusher brushes, and lip pencils, not even looking up as I went into a stall and slid the bolt across. I hung the bag over a hook that had been thoughtfully provided by the management and began to search in earnest.
Berlyn's wallet was not that educational: driver's license, a couple of credit cards, a few folded credit card receipts shoved down among the currency. Her checkbook showed a series of deposits at weekly intervals, which I assumed represented paychecks from Kepler Plumbing, Inc. Chick was seriously underpaid. Scanning back over the last several months, I spotted an occasional deposit of twenty-five hundred dollars, usually followed by checks made out to Holiday Travel. That was interesting. I found the small velvet jeweler's box in which the earrings were probably kept.
I tried the interior zippered compartment, sorting through old grocery lists, Thrifty drugstore receipts, deposit slips. I pulled out passbooks for two different savings accounts. The first had been opened with a nine-thousand-dollar deposit about a month after Lorna's death. I could see intermittent withdrawals of twenty-five hundred dollars, bringing the current balance down to fifteen hundred. The second account held another six thousand dollars. There was probably a third account somewhere else. Berlyn had tucked the carbons of her deposit and withdrawal slips in the back of one passbook – information she didn't dare leave at home. If Janice had discovered her cache of hidden funds, sticky questions would arise. I lifted a carboned slip from each passbook.
Someone knocked on the stall. "Are you dead in there?"
"Just a minute," I called.
I depressed the toilet handle, letting the toilet flush noisily while I shoved everything back in the handbag. I emerged from the stall with the bag over my shoulder. A black girl with a seventies Afro moved into the stall I'd vacated. I found an empty basin and gave my hands a vigorous scrub, feeling like they needed it. I left the restroom and returned to the table in haste just as the dance music came to a blasting finale. There was tumultuous applause from the dance floor, complete with piercing whistles and foot stompings. I slid onto my chair, snagged my bag from Berlyn's chair, and slipped hers into place.