by Chloe Morgan
I cleaned myself up and washed my hands. I watched as the pregnancy test slowly came to fruition. And when that plus sign glared at me from the second test in that damn box, tears filled my eyes.
Could my life suck any more than it did right now?
I had been so sick these past few weeks. Vomiting constantly. Dealing with headaches. Navigating painful boobs and an exhaustion that made winter break exams almost impossible. I still don’t know how I’d passed them all with A’s.
And now, I knew why I’d felt so shitty.
I hadn’t just been miserable with the pregnancy, though. My heart ached. My soul ached. I fell asleep every night wishing Nathan was with me. Wrapped around me. There to greet me in the morning before sending me off to school.
Nathan, the father of my child.
“Oh, no,” I said, whimpering.
He was supposed to be a weekend hookup. Nothing else. I shouldn’t have fallen for him. That wasn’t the plan. And now, I was in love with a ghost and carrying his child. A temporary moment in my life came with permanent consequences.
Ones that would derail my entire life’s plan.
“Shit,” I hissed.
“Jenny! You here?” Sara called out.
My hands scrambled as quickly as they could. Sara had walked back into our dorm room, and I tried my best to clean everything up. I tossed the pregnancy tests into the sink and poured the urine into the toilet. I tossed the cup away and flushed the toilet as Sara’s footsteps grew closer. Panic clutched my chest. I reached for the sticks in the sink, ready to toss them in the trash as well.
“Oh. My. Gosh,” Sara said.
I whipped around and saw her staring into the sink with her jaw hanging open. Her eyes slowly raked up to mine, and I felt tears rush down my cheeks. My hands trembled and my knees felt weak. My stomach rolled with nausea that forced me to my knees and put my head in the toilet.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. I’ve got you. Come here,” Sara said soothingly.
I vomited my breakfast into the toilet as she held my hair back. She breathed cool breath onto the back of my neck as I emptied my body. I reached up and flushed it down, then sat back onto my ass. I wiped at my mouth and gazed tiredly into Sara’s eyes that were filled with so many questions.
“What the hell just happened?” she asked.
“I’m so sorry, Sara,” I whispered.
“Why? Why are you sorry?”
I was so tired, and so scared, and so exhausted.
“I slept with Nathan at the lodge. I know you told me not to. I know you told me to stay away. I’m so sorry, Sara. I just couldn’t help it. I don’t know what happened, and now this is all happening and I don’t know what to do and I don’t want you to hate me and I just want everything to be okay and nothing is okay right now and I can’t lose my best friend and—”
She threw her arms around me, and I held her close. I sobbed into her shoulder, feeling her slide her fingers through my hair. She rocked me side to side as my crying subsided, and then she gripped my shoulders and looked into my eyes.
“It’s okay. I get it,” she said.
“Wh—what?” I asked breathlessly.
“My thing with Luke has kind of… changed my perspective on things like this.”
“So you’re… you’re not mad?”
“I’m worried about you. I’m very worried about you. But no. I’m not upset with you,” she said.
She took me back into her arms, and I sighed. I let my mind bounce around as the panic engulfed me. I didn’t know what to do. My plans for my future had been tossed out the window, and my wish for a stable life had come to an end. I was about to be a single mother with no job, trying to raise a baby and pay off the debt I accrued for college. Even with the scholarships I obtained, I’d still had to take some out. And now, I’d have no way of paying those back.
I felt doomed to live the life I had growing up. I felt guilty, making my unborn child live the life I had lived growing up.
“I think you need to get out of here for a few days,” Sara said.
I shook my head. “I just want to stay here and sleep.”
“I know you took out a loan to stay here over Christmas break. But I really think you should come to the lodge with me. Luke’s picking me up tonight to take me there for the holiday. It might not be too late to back out and recoup the payment you just paid.”
“I really don’t need to be there,” I said, snickering.
“I’ll be there. You know, to help sort out your thoughts. And with everything that’s happening, any sort of money you can save is a good thing. Even if it simply means not taking out a loan for a food plan to stay on campus for winter break,” she said.
And I knew she was right.
“You know I don’t really deserve a holiday. Not after the mistake I’ve made. I have too many plans to make now. I have too many things to figure out,” I said.
“And you don’t have to figure it out alone. I’m your best friend, Jenny. Let me help you,” Sara said.
“I don’t know…”
“I mean, technically? I’m the aunt. So, you kind of have to let me help.”
I laid my head on Sara’s shoulder and wondered if she’d tell her brother. I didn’t want Nathan to know. At least, not yet. Not until I had a plan in place. I finally gave in to Sara’s demands and nodded against her shoulder, agreeing to go with her to the lodge.
Clearing my head and getting away sounded like a good idea, anyway.
“All right. Come on. I’ll help you pack,” Sara said.
“Just my pajamas and my robe will be fine,” I said.
“And your fuzzy socks. Can’t forget those.”
Chapter 13
Nathan
Christmas Eve
I pulled my car into the Winter Moon Lodge, my heart beating so quickly it felt like it was fluttering. I knew this was crazy. I knew I was taking a massive risk. But I couldn’t help it. I wanted to see Jenny again, and after calling my sister last night to check on her, I got the surprise of my life.
As we talked and caught up on her and her winter vacation plans, I heard a familiar laugh in the background.
I’d never forget that laugh. The innocence of that sound. I called to make sure Sara had gotten to the lodge okay and that Luke was taking care of her, then figured out Jenny was with her. Her laughter was like the tinkling of small Christmas bells.
Jenny was staying at the lodge with Sara, and just like that I’d made the decision to put in for a long weekend.
Getting back to work at the lodge had been hard. We checked people in and out of that house, but every time I stepped foot in it I felt Jenny’s presence. It had been cleaned down by the maid staff numerous times, and yet I still smelled her whenever I walked through the front doors to make sure things were squared away for our elite guests.
Now, I was booking the same hotel room I’d had over Thanksgiving break in the hopes of spending time with Jenny.
Alone.
With her in my arms as I gazed into her eyes.
I pulled my car up to the valet and got out. I slipped my bag out of the trunk and tossed the man my keys. I checked in and set my stuff down in my room, but I didn’t bother making myself comfortable.
I was on a mission.
I walked down to the front desk and procured one of the computers. I used my credentials to figure out where Luke had put Sara up for the winter break. It shouldn’t have shocked me that he’d used his discount to put them in that house again. I grinned as I stepped out from behind the desk.
At least Luke was treating my sister the way she deserved.
I hopped into a golf cart and drove to the house. I didn’t stop for anyone or anything, despite the guests wanting rides. I was on a miniature vacation. One that I hoped was spent with Jenny at my side. I pulled into the small driveway and walked up to the door, knocking on it with fervor and anticipation.
When Sara answered it, she looked shocked.
But not surpr
ised.
“Nathan, what are you doing—?”
“Where’s Jenny?” I asked.
Her face fell, but I ignored it. I pushed past her and found Luke in the living room, sipping on a beer. His eyes fell beyond my shoulder to look at my sister, but I didn’t think anything of it.
“Sara, would you like to take a tour of the kitchens to see how dinner’s prepared in the restaurant?” Luke asked.
I stopped in my tracks. That caught my attention.
“Sure. That sounds fun,” Sara said.
“Why are you two leaving?” I asked.
Luke and Sara looked at one another before I heard the sweetest voice alive.
“Nathan?”
I whipped my head around and saw her standing there. In the hallway on the lower level outside of the only bedroom on the main floor. Jenny looked… tired. Worn down. Like life had beaten her to her very core. Worry wafted through my veins. I saw the shock on her face as her lips parted and her eyes bulged.
“Do you want us to stay?” Sara asked.
Relief flooded my veins when Jenny shook her head.
I dismissed the awkwardness of the situation. Sara and Luke left, leaving me standing there, staring at Jenny. We were alone, and the second the front door closed I made my way for her.
I took her hand within mine and felt it trembling.
“How’ve you been?” I asked.
Jenny looked down at our hands before shrugging.
“From the sound of things, I think things could be better,” I said.
Jenny lifted her eyes to mine, and I saw all the pain in the world behind them.
“I think I have an idea of how to improve things,” I said, grinning.
I pulled her softly into me and cupped her cheek with my free hand. I guided her lips to mine, tasting a mixture of mouthwash and crackers on her breath. I slid my fingers into her hair and gripped her tendrils softly, feeling her fall into me.
Then, she pulled away quickly.
“Jenny?” I asked.
She shook out her hair and pressed herself against the hallway wall.
“Jenny, what is it?” I asked as I stood in front of her.
“We can’t keep doing this,” she said breathlessly.
“Doing what?”
“This!” she exclaimed.
Her entire body trembled, and I watched her face pale.
“Are you feeling okay?” I asked.
“We can’t keep hooking up, Nathan. I’m not the hookup type. So, we have to stop, okay?” Jenny asked.
My heart stopped in my chest as I took a small step forward.
“What do you mean, you aren’t the hookup type?” I asked.
Jenny scoffed and shook her head.
“It means I can’t do this anymore because I feel things,” she said softly.
“Well, then it should ease your mind to know that I’ve reached a similar conclusion about myself.”
She rolled her eyes. “And what conclusion is that?”
“I’m serious, Jenny. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”
Her eyes fluttered up to mine. “You haven’t?”
“No. Not since the first time I met you, and not since I learned of your quick return home a few weeks ago.”
“Nathan, I—”
“This isn’t a hookup to me, Jenny. It wasn’t after our second encounter. In fact, I don’t think it even was after our first encounter. This is real for me. For the first time in my life, this is real. Raw. Vulnerable. True. And I want it. I’m ready for it. But only with you. I’m ready for this new beginning, with us at the helm.”
She fell silent as I moved for her. As I took her hands within mine. As I slipped her arms around my neck and let my hands fall to her hips.
“I only want this with you,” I whispered.
I slipped my arms around her back and pulled her away from the wall. I pressed my lips against hers tightly, feeling Jenny moan. I covered her back with my arms as her hips rolled into mine. Her entire body blanketed me in a comfort I hadn’t felt since fucking Thanksgiving.
Since the last time I felt her against me.
“Oh, Nathan,” she moaned.
“I’ve got you, Jenny. I’ve got you,” I whispered.
I walked her down the hallway and back into the bedroom. I closed the door with my foot, listening as it shut softly into place. My hands roamed her back, slipping my fingertips underneath the hem of her pajama shirt. Her skin electrified me. It ignited a fire in my gut as her tongue slipped across the slit of my lips. I parted them for her, allowing her to taste me. To mark me. To memorize me the way I had memorized every part of her.
I slipped her shirt over her head and pulled her back to me, my lips falling to her ear.
“I want all of you,” I whispered.
And I felt the goose bumps rise against her skin as her breath shuddered in the crook of my neck.
Chapter 14
Jenny
We fell into the bed, a tangled mess of limbs and kisses. We somehow got out of our clothes, and the warmth of his body ripped me underneath his tide. I kissed his neck and nibbled along his bare shoulder. I rolled him over and straddled him, spreading my hands out over his chest. I felt his strength. I felt his heart beating against the palms of my hands.
“I don’t want you this way,” Nathan murmured.
His body shot up and our lips crashed together. He scooted himself back, placing his body against the headboard of the bed. His arms wrapped around me as I ground against him. I felt his cock throbbing between my pussy lips as his hands slid through my hair. Every action was soft, yet commanding. Tender, yet guiding. Our tongues collided as I rose up, allowing his cock to slide deep against my swollen walls.
We groaned together, shivering against one another as our tides met.
Tears rushed my eyes as he lifted his hips to fill me. His cock pulsed. My walls massaged him. My body spiraled over the deep end as his hand twisted up into my hair. He pulled my lips back to his, pulling my head off to the side. And as my arms threaded around his neck, he moved quicker than lightning.
He moved me until I was on my back again, gazing into his beautiful hazel eyes.
“My Beautiful Jenny,” he murmured.
My heart stopped in my chest. My pussy clamped down around his cock. My limbs clung to him as the words fell effortlessly off his tongue. He smiled at me, solidifying the dark truth I had plunged into four weeks ago.
The dark truth of my love for Nathan Winston.
I fisted his hair and crashed his lips back to mine. Tears ran down the sides of my face as our bodies moved as one. Juices dripped down my ass crack. My toes slid up and down the backs of his legs. His hands found mine as he threaded our fingers together, then he pressed my arms out and pinned them to the bed.
Gazing down at me with a heated stare filled with…
Was that love I saw in his eyes?
“Nathan?” I whispered.
Our hips sat together as his eyes danced between mine.
“Nathan,” I said softly.
His head shook. As if I had ripped him from a trance with my voice.
“Oh, Nathan,” I whispered.
His forehead fell against mine, and he slammed into me. My fingernails curled into the tops of his hands as my tits bounced against his chest. I was overwhelmed by him. By the fire he shot through my veins. By the way his cock stretched me to limits I’d never experienced. I breathed in the air he allowed me as he panted against my lips, our bodies sweating and gyrating and trembling against the other.
“Jenny. My Jenny. My beautiful, wonderful Jenny.”
“Nathan. I’m so close. Please. Don’t stop.”
“I don’t plan on it. Never, with you,” he murmured.
He rolled deeper. He ground harder against my clit. My aching breasts cried out for attention as they raked against his chest. He fell into me, sliding his hands down my arms. And when I locked myself around him, the coil in my gut popped.
“Nathan!”
My sounds were muffled as he encompassed my lips. His tongue filled my mouth, tasting me and muting me at the same time. My nails raked down his back. His hips locked against mine. He paused, his cock throbbing endlessly before painting the walls of my body with his mark.
He growled down my throat, and I was all too eager to swallow it whole.
I collapsed against the bed, but he didn’t follow me. Instead, he slipped quickly off my body and pulled me into his arms. Our intermingled arousal dripped from between my legs as he captured my thigh between his. He held me close to him, surrounding me in his strong, pulsing arms.
I pulled the covers over us and sank willingly into his heat.
“Are you serious about this?” I asked softly.
He kissed my forehead before nodding.
“I am,” Nathan murmured.
“So, you’re serious about this being a new beginning?”
“For us both. I want a relationship with you, Jenny. No matter how difficult it might be.”
Well, it was now or never.
“It might be more difficult than you think,” I said softly.
He crooked his finger underneath my chin and pulled my gaze up to his.
“Why is that?” he asked.
I drew in a deep breath. “Because I’m pregnant.”
I expected many things when I saw the shock roll over his face. I expected anger. Resentment. Accusations. I expected him to get out of bed and leave me there. At the very least, I expected him to tell me he couldn’t do that. That he could do us, but not that.
Instead, however, I watched his hand disappear underneath the covers. And it didn’t resurface until I felt him pressing it against my stomach.
“You’re pregnant?” he asked.
I nodded slowly, and his eyes fell down. He shifted the blanket off me just enough so he could see his hand against my stomach. I wasn’t sure what to think. I didn’t know what was going on in his head.
Until…
“I’m the luckiest man alive,” Nathan whispered.
I didn’t think I’d heard him right until his eyes came up to meet mine.