by Beth Wiseman
“Don’t panic.” Lydia spoke firmly, but Beverly heard the shakiness still in her voice. “She’s not dangerous. Like everyone says, she’s a fixture here. If she were dangerous, something would have already happened, or she’d be in jail. Besides, we could have just made a wrong turn and been coming out of her driveway to get back on the road. There’s no way for her to know we were in her haus.”
Beverly’s nerves tensed as she swallowed with difficulty, struggling to find her voice. “Except . . .” She paused to slow her breathing. “I put the key to the nursery back, but . . .” She turned to Lydia, who was looking at her with questioning eyes. “I didn’t lock the door.”
* * *
Lydia just wanted to get home and forget about this day, but the expression on Margaret’s face was etched into her mind. As the old woman slowed her truck and scowled, she might as well have said I know you were in my house. And the way she’d extended her arm as though she wanted to touch the buggy—or her—was unnerving.
“Are you going to tell Samuel about this?”
Beverly looked a mess. Her prayer covering had slipped to one side, strands of hair blew loose in the breeze, and she had a smudge of dirt on her cheek.
Lydia thought about it. “I don’t want to lie to him, but if I tell him we went into Margaret’s haus, he’ll be angry.” She paused, sighing, as she brushed back her own wild strands of hair from across her face. Avoiding the entire truth also wasn’t going to bring her closer to Samuel, and she knew she wouldn’t feel good about keeping this from him, but . . .
“I really want our date Saturday night to go well. We don’t get to go out by ourselves much.” Actually, never. She clicked her tongue and gave Chester a gentle flick of the reins to pick up the pace a little more.
“Then I won’t say anything to Joseph.” Beverly put her sunglasses on now that the sun’s rays were back in full force. “I don’t want to lie, either, so I’ll just tell him we got something to eat and drove by Margaret’s house.” She flinched. “That much is true.”
“I think I’ll always wonder about Margaret, and I really did hope we could find a way to help her.” She turned to Beverly. “But did you see the way she looked at us?”
“And the way she reached out toward us?” Beverly shook her head. “It was unsettling, to say the least.”
The women were quiet for a while.
“We should forget about what we saw and stay away from Margaret,” Lydia finally said. “We’re bound to see her from afar every now and then, like we did at the school, but I don’t think we can help her.”
“Maybe she is mentally ill.” Beverly rubbed her forehead. “Or maybe she never got past her bereavement. I understand about grief. But Margaret’s situation is bizarre.”
“Ya, we’ll just leave her alone to live her life the way she’s chosen.” Lydia breathed a sigh of convicted relief. “We’ll let it go.”
Beverly nodded. “Ya, agreed.”
They rode in silence until they reached Lydia’s house. After they’d given Chester a sufficient amount of water, they readied Beverly’s horse for travel.
“I’d ask you to come in for a while, but I need to pick up Mattie at mei mamm’s haus.”
“Nee, I need to get home as well, but I’ll see you Saturday.” Beverly put a finger to her lips. “Seeing Margaret and going inside her haus can be our secret.” She gave Lydia a long hug, the kind of embrace you give someone you haven’t seen in a long time. An unspoken sisterhood had bonded them today. Lydia just wished that bond wasn’t based on a secret they’d vowed to keep.
Lydia wasn’t fond of secrets, especially when it meant keeping something else from Samuel. It seemed like she withheld enough from her husband, but those were feelings she didn’t share. This was a tangible event he wouldn’t approve of. As she recalled their blowup the night before, she was even more sure he’d be angry if he learned she and Beverly had gone into Margaret’s house.
Sighing, she prepared for the shame she could feel coming. And this time, what she’d done to earn it had been premeditated, which made her feel even worse.
* * *
Samuel was anxious to hear about Lydia’s day, if not a little wary. He wasn’t crazy about the idea of her and Beverly searching out Margaret’s house, but he refused to let anything get under his skin this evening. He had a big night planned for Lydia on Saturday, and he didn’t want anything to hamper their pending date. The closer it got to Saturday, the more excited he was to have a proper date with his wife. Each day, he felt more and more like a giddy teenager.
When he walked inside the house, he breathed in the smell of oregano and garlic, savoring the fragrant aromas that signaled spaghetti for supper. Maybe even garlic bread with Parmesan cheese sprinkled on top. His mouth watered as he slipped out of his shoes and hung his hat on the rack in the living room.
“It smells gut,” he said as he walked into the kitchen. Lydia stirred the simmering spaghetti sauce as Samuel pulled out a chair and sat down. Her hair was wet and fell past her waist.
She turned around and smiled. “Danki.”
Mattie was already in her high chair. “Wie bischt, mei maedel?” Samuel leaned over and kissed the baby on the cheek, then he looked at the clock on the wall. “You showered early.”
“Ya. Beverly and I got caught in the rain, and I felt sticky, so when I got home, I showered while Mattie was napping.”
Samuel took a deep breath. “Did you see Margaret’s haus?”
Lydia carried the pot of sauce to the table. “Ya, we did.” She returned to the stove to drain some noodles in the sink. “I’m not sure how Beverly even spotted it. The haus sits way back from the road. It’s like your daed said. It seems the haus is more or less abandoned. Vines have overtaken it, windows are broken, and it was just sad to think Margaret used to live there.” She came to the table with the noodles in a large bowl.
Samuel bowed his head when she did. Then when she started feeding Mattie tiny bites of noodles, he dug in and filled his plate. Lydia’s spaghetti sauce was even better than his mother’s. “Did you eat out?”
“Ya.” Lydia offered Mattie apple juice from a sippy cup, but when their daughter’s face twisted into the expression she had right before she wailed, his wife quickly gave her the bottle she’d had sitting nearby. “We got fish sandwiches at Stop N Sea.”
Samuel wanted to ask if Lydia was done trying to gather information about Margaret, but he didn’t want to come across as too overbearing, the way he had last night. “They have gut sandwiches,” he said between mouthfuls.
He’d been planning their date every chance he had. As badly as he wanted to tell Lydia what he had lined up, he’d rather she be surprised. He’d had help from Joseph, but also from his other Englisch coworkers. It might not be the most traditional and sanctioned date for an Amish man and woman, but if a few rules were broken along the way, Samuel hoped God would be forgiving. They hadn’t had much of a rumschpringe.
Besides, more than once he’d heard that a woman needs romance in a relationship, and he was determined to sweep his wife off her feet, to woo her. And if their date went well, maybe they could finally work their way to a more intimate relationship. He would also be patient—not like he’d been in the beginning when Lydia was pregnant. This time would be different.
After they ate, Samuel played with Mattie in the living room while Lydia cleared the kitchen table. He looked forward to holding his wife as they drifted off to sleep tonight. These days, no one was pretending to be asleep, which eased the tension in the evenings.
After they went through their nightly devotions, he excused himself to take a shower.
* * *
Lydia shuffled into the bedroom holding Mattie, who seemed to get a burst of energy after her bottle instead of getting sleepy.
Samuel was propped up in bed, where he’d been reading a book. But now he lowered it.
“Can Mattie lie here with you while I finish cleaning the kitchen? I let her nap too late
this afternoon.” Lydia kissed her baby on the cheek. “But she’s all smiles, and I suppose I should be thankful for that. Her first tooth finally pushed through the surface.”
Samuel marked his place, closed the book, and held out his arms. “Ya, sure. Come here mei sweet maedel.”
She handed Mattie to Samuel as the baby flapped her arms and smiled. Mattie loved her daddy, and a special kind of love was at play when father and daughter were together. A deep and fulfilling sensation warmed her heart, and she allowed herself a few more moments to watch them before she scooted off to the kitchen.
As she washed and rinsed dishes, she thought about her day, glad Samuel hadn’t pushed her for more details, making it easier to avoid lying to him. It might be a while before she didn’t think about the perfectly clean and decorated nursery at Margaret’s house, but she was glad Beverly wanted to put the matter to rest too.
The familiar shame had tried to force itself into her heart, but she’d fought back and relied on God’s grace. He wouldn’t appreciate her not telling Samuel the entire truth, and for that she asked for forgiveness. She also promised she would earnestly try to avoid situations that would put her in a position to feel shame.
As her thoughts wound back to Margaret, she recalled the way the older woman had looked at them today. Lydia tried to discern why it had been so unsettling. Guilt from trespassing in the woman’s house seemed to be the logical answer.
In the past, she’d gone months without seeing Margaret. Maybe the older woman would retreat to wherever she went for a while—maybe to that nursery—and stay out of sight. Meanwhile, Lydia could do only one thing for Margaret—pray for her.
As the sun began its descent, Lydia finished putting the last of the dishes in the drainboard, then wiped down the table. Yawning, she hoped it wouldn’t be too long before Mattie was tired enough to sleep. Lydia was having a more restful sleep these days. Curled up in Samuel’s arms gave her a sense of calm that they’d both settled into. During supper, she’d asked him what he had planned for their date on Saturday, but he’d only grinned and said it was a surprise. She loved that he was trying to make it special.
She took the kitchen towel from over her shoulder and hung it on the rack by the sink, then turned to join her husband. But something between the fading sunbeams streaming through the window caught her eye. She allowed her gaze to unwillingly trail to the end of their long driveway.
Her breath seized in her lungs when she saw a blue pickup truck parked at the side of the road. It was too far to tell if someone was in the vehicle, but there was no denying whose truck it was. Lydia could see red balls attached to green stems swaying in the gentle breeze.
She put a hand to her mouth as her heart pumped at a furious rate. What had she and Beverly stirred up? And what should she do now? Glancing toward the bedroom, she heard Mattie giggling as Samuel spoke baby talk to her. If Lydia was forced to tell him the whole truth about today, he’d be angry. But if he knew Margaret was lurking near their house, he’d be furious.
Was Samuel right about her? Was Margaret dangerous and not just a harmless old woman? Or was she purposefully letting Lydia know she knew she’d been in her house today and warning her to stay away?
If only Margaret didn’t know where she lived. Their home was tucked away, out of sight of neighbors, but since they knew almost everyone in their community, they rarely locked their doors. Lydia checked both outer doors and made sure they were locked. Then she checked the windows, ensuring they were also shut and locked despite the warm weather.
By the time she was done, the blue truck was gone. But Lydia didn’t think sleep would come easily tonight—or be peaceful.
Chapter 13
Beverly had been looking forward to Saturday evening and spending time with Joseph. As she pulled into Lydia and Samuel’s driveway with Susan late in the afternoon, she recalled the quick kiss she and Joseph shared in the darkness of the railroad tunnel. Beverly wasn’t going to consider it their first kiss; it was fast and clumsy. Hopefully tonight, after the babies were asleep, Joseph would kiss her again. She wanted to see his expression, for him to cradle her face in his hands. Maybe he would see in her eyes how much she’d already come to care about him.
Joseph was a grown man who had managed to hold on to his boyish looks, and Beverly loved that about him. And he made her laugh, which was high on her list of dating qualifications. She’d spent time grieving for her husband, as was expected, but she’d spent too much time pining over the loss of her relationship with Chriss. She was ready to get on with her life, and she wanted it filled with joy and laughter.
“Are you ready for a playdate with Mattie this evening?” After she tethered her horse, she carried Susan across the yard with the diaper bag draped over her shoulder. Joseph wasn’t here yet, but she’d barely made it to the top porch step when Lydia met her and grabbed her arm.
“I have to be quick. Samuel will be out of the shower any second.” Lydia was breathing so hard that Beverly worried something awful had happened.
“What’s wrong?” She hoisted Susan onto her hip and adjusted the diaper bag.
“Margaret parked at the end of our driveway Wednesday night.” She shook her head, cringing. “Well, not really on the driveway, but on the road right by our driveway. Why would she do that? And how did she know where I live?”
“I don’t know. What did Samuel say?” Beverly had tried to forget about Margaret and her perfectly decorated baby nursery inside the crumbling house.
“I didn’t tell him.” Lydia straightened. “Like we agreed, I didn’t tell him about going in the haus. And I didn’t tell him about Margaret parking on the road.”
“Was she there the last two nights too?”
Lydia shook her head. “Nee. She didn’t stay long Wednesday night, almost like she just wanted me to know she knew we’d been in her haus. I don’t know . . .” She pressed a hand to her forehead. “Maybe I’m making too much of it, but I wanted you to know, so I’m glad you got here before Joseph so I could tell you.”
“Ya, okay.” Beverly’s chest tightened. She wasn’t sure how much of it was from concern about Margaret or from anticipating being alone with Joseph.
Lydia blew out a long breath, and Beverly could see the relief on her friend’s face. Maybe she just needed someone to know, and Beverly was the only person she could tell.
“Samuel has a special night planned.” Lydia switched gears before Beverly had time to fully process what she’d told her. “And I’m so excited to see what he has in store for us.” She finally acknowledged Susan by kissing the baby on her cheek.
“He hasn’t told you what you’ll be doing?” Grinning, Beverly sighed. “That’s so romantic, that he wants to surprise you.”
“I’m a little nervous.” Lydia’s face turned a light shade of pink.
“Why? He’s your husband. I’m sure he’s planned something you’ll enjoy.”
Lydia waved her off as she let out a nervous laugh. “Ya, I’m sure he has.” She stepped aside. “Come in, come in. I set up Mattie’s playpen in the living room. I know she’s going to be happy to see Susan.”
“I’ve been looking forward to this all week.” Once inside, Beverly set Susan in the playpen with Mattie, along with a few toys from the bag she’d brought.
“Are you comfortable being alone with Joseph? I mean, I know you’ve been married, and I’m sure you know to be . . . um, careful?” Lydia raised her eyebrows as she offered a tentative smile. It seemed an odd thing to say, but Beverly reminded herself that Lydia was only seventeen.
“No worries, mei friend.” She touched Lydia on the arm. “Nothing inappropriate will happen in your haus while you’re gone. Just plan to have a gut time this evening.”
“Ach, I don’t even know what I’m talking about.” Lydia chuckled.
Beverly’s friend seemed unusually nervous for a woman going on a date with her husband. Maybe she just wanted it to be special since they rarely got to go out by themselves.<
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* * *
Joseph arrived at Samuel and Lydia’s toting a dozen red roses, as he’d been instructed, and he placed them on the rocking chair on the porch like Samuel asked him to do. Then behind his back, he held a dozen yellow roses. He’d bought them for Beverly. He hoped the gift wasn’t overkill, but he wanted her to have flowers too.
Samuel pushed open the screen door before Joseph had time to knock. He peered around the corner at the roses.
“Danki, mei friend.” Samuel put a hand on Joseph’s shoulder. “I’ve never given Lydia flowers, so I thought it would be a nice gesture.”
Joseph eyed his friend up and down. His black slacks were pressed, along with his dark-blue shirt. “Ach, you clean up well.” Joseph scowled. “But I can’t believe you’ve never given your fraa flowers.”
“I’m going to make up for it tonight.” Samuel winked as he craned his neck to see what Joseph had behind his back. “Beverly is getting roses, too, I see.”
“Ya, I can’t let you one-up me.” Joseph chuckled. He was eager to have some alone time with Beverly, and he hoped the flowers would help set the mood. His awkward kiss in the dark railroad tunnel could be improved upon. He wanted to kiss her properly tonight, without slamming his nose into hers.
Samuel rubbed his hands together, grinning. “Lydia and Beverly are inside feeding the bopplis, and then we’ll be ready to go.”
Joseph laughed again. “Relax, Samuel. You act like this is your first date with your fraa.” He’d never seen a fellow so nervous about taking his wife out.
Samuel actually blushed. “Ya, well . . .” He shrugged before he motioned for Joseph to follow him inside.
Beverly and Lydia were lowering the babies into the playpen. When Beverly looked up, Joseph smiled and brought the roses from behind his back. “These are for you.”
Beverly brought a hand to her chest and gasped a little. “Danki.” She batted her eyes at him, and Joseph didn’t think he’d ever made a wiser investment. He’d also bought the red roses. Samuel promised to reimburse him on payday. Joseph didn’t mind fronting the money for the purchase. He knew his friend helped his parents with health-care expenses.