“You said your place was close.”
“Not that close.” Alex took off her coat and held it out. “Here. Take mine. You’ll freeze in that.”
“You’ll freeze without a coat at all.”
Alex held the coat out an inch higher. “Take it and we can pretend you think I’m chivalrous.”
Emily rolled her eyes but reached for the coat anyway. “What would I do without someone to take care of me?”
“Nice sarcasm. And here I was about to say it’s nice to know that you can do as you’re told.” Alex enjoyed Emily’s feigned glare. After their earlier conversation, she wasn’t certain what the vibe would be between them. Playful teasing felt exactly right. “But I won’t. Unless you’re into that.”
“I’m not saying one way or the other.”
Emily’s glare turned into a coy look that brought a lot of questions to Alex’s mind. Questions for later.
Alex shuffled through the coats on the rack until she found a fluorescent pink ski parka with a fake fur trim. It belonged to Katherine and was completely not her style—in addition to being too tight—but she pulled it on anyway and flipped up the hood. “Ready?”
“You look ridiculous.”
“I know. And you feel more comfortable with me looking silly.”
Emily narrowed her eyes. “You’re right.”
“Gotta watch out for the smart ones.” Alex tapped her temple and then opened the back door. “After you.”
Emily stepped past, yelping as the wind blasted her with a flurry of snow. She turned around to face Alex and quickly zipped the coat. Snowflakes dotted her dark hair and tipped her eyelashes.
“Holy hell! It’s too cold to even breathe out here. Why do people live in places like this?”
“It’s a real struggle living in Aspen,” Alex joked.
“Seriously, why freeze?”
“Because it’s also beautiful.” Almost as beautiful as you, Alex silently added. She knew that comment would only come across as cheesy, but it was true. Too damn true. Pushing away the wish that tonight could be a date, she pointed at two trees covered in snow. “Path’s right through those pines. I don’t recommend talking much. The ice goes right to your chest as soon as you open your mouth.”
Emily squinted and then shook her head. “I can’t see any path. We’re stuck in the middle of a snow globe.”
Alex stepped in front of her and stomped her feet to pack down the snow. “Follow me.”
The wind gusted again, and Emily reached for Alex’s hand. “Don’t lose me.” When Alex glanced over her shoulder, Emily only tightened her grip. “Dying of frostbite the first time I go to a sex party would be a real bummer.”
Before Alex came up with something witty to say in response, another gust sent more snow swirling. She trained her gaze back to the pine trees that marked the boundary between her property and Katherine’s and marched ahead. Focusing on the trees and the path did not, however, stop her from thinking about Emily’s hand and how good it felt nestled in hers. Her heart had lodged in her throat the moment Emily had reached for her, and it seemed intent on setting up residence there. Emily hadn’t meant anything romantic by saying, “Don’t lose me.” And yet Alex couldn’t help wanting to believe the words were about more than a walk through a snowstorm.
When they reached her front door, she reluctantly let go of Emily’s hand to find her keys. Despite the cold, she wished the walk had been longer. Or that she had some excuse to go back to holding hands.
They shook off snow and then hurried into the warm foyer. Alex hung their coats in the otherwise empty closet, making a mental note to return Katherine’s old parka. When she turned around, Emily was rubbing her hands together and blowing on her fingers.
“I’ll get a fire going,” Alex said. “We’ll warm up quick. And then hot cocoa?”
“That’s why I’m here.”
The flight and the offer for cocoa seemed like a week ago. It wasn’t the date she’d imagined, but she was happy Emily was here all the same and she intended to make the best of it. A little part of her still hoped that by the end of it, Emily would want more than one night.
Emily walked into the living room and looked around. “This place fits you.”
“How so?”
“It’s nice, but not lavish. And not a mansion like Katherine’s. More comfortable. More you, I guess.”
“I like comfortable.” Alex liked even more that Emily felt that way. “Wouldn’t want to be a mansion.”
“You’re not a mansion. I mean, if someone described you to me, I’d probably think that you were fancy enough to be one. But you’re…” Emily seemed to search for a word as she walked from the living room through the dining area to the kitchen and then circled back, stopping at the couch. “You’re oddly cozy. Like a ski cabin.”
Alex laughed. “Never got that compliment before.”
“You’re welcome.” Emily ran her hand over the back of the leather couch. “I’m sure this place still cost a bazillion dollars.”
“Not quite a bazillion, but close. It is Aspen, after all.” Alex felt a little sheepish for how much she’d spent, but the prices had gone up in the area even more since she’d bought and she didn’t regret the decision. “I had my eye on this cabin for years. Finally made an offer to the family who owned it. It wasn’t on the market, but I knew they were thinking of selling.”
Emily nodded at the fireplace and the rug in front of it. “And the rug seriously hasn’t seen any action? After what I saw in Katherine’s private room, that surprises me.”
“No action. I swear.” More than ever Alex wished she could turn back the clock on the day and say no to Katherine and Madison. But like TJ had said, Emily might as well know the truth going in. “I don’t usually bring anyone here. Actually, you’re the first.”
Emily’s look was one part surprise and one part something Alex couldn’t quite place. Was she pleased to know she was an exception, or did she not believe Alex?
“I appreciate that you offered your place this time. Especially now that I know it’s not your usual.”
She was still nervous, clearly, and Alex had to stop herself from again suggesting that they didn’t have to have sex. Emily had made it clear that was all she wanted, but Alex also knew they needed to take baby steps regardless. “I wanted you to feel like you could relax and have a good time.”
“I believe you. In fact, I’m starting to think the chivalry thing isn’t only an act.”
“Don’t let the secret out.” Alex joked again, but the note of trust in Emily’s voice was more than she’d hoped for.
“I have to give you props, too, for being dorky on my behalf. That fluorescent pink jacket with the fake fur collar is so not you.”
“Being dorky on your behalf?” Alex held out her arms. “This is me all the time.”
Emily laughed and the warm sound filled Alex’s chest. The wide smile on her face, the first real smile Alex had seen all night, made her all the more gorgeous. Resisting her was going to be hard. But Alex wanted to resist—for a while, at least. They couldn’t only have sex. She’d regret it too much if that was all that happened.
After all the highs she’d gotten from pleasuring women who simply wanted to be cherished for one night, she wondered why she needed more this time. Why did she want Emily to actually be into her as a person? Was it only her own ego saying that sex wasn’t enough for her anymore?
Alex pointed to the record player in the living room. “If you want to pick out some music, go for it. You can tease me later about the number of Journey albums I own. I’ll grab some wood and get the fire started.”
It didn’t take long to get the wood—Jorie had left a good stock in the garage—but she came back to find Emily sitting cross-legged on the rug with the box of records spilling out all around her. “Find anything you like?”
“Are these all yours?”
“Most of them are. A few belonged to my dad. He gave me some of his favorites af
ter he went digital.”
Emily held up Bob Dylan’s Blonde on Blonde. “I listened to this album in middle school. Every day for months.”
“That’s from the sixties, isn’t it?”
“And it’s a great album,” Emily said. “I take it this is one of your dad’s?”
Alex nodded.
“Can we play it?”
“Knock yourself out. I’m still trying to wrap my head around you being a Dylan fan.”
“He’s an amazing songwriter.”
“Yeah, maybe, but his voice—”
“Nope. Don’t even go there. Not if you want to get laid tonight.”
Alex laughed. “Fair enough. I’ll stick to making a fire.”
Once the fire was going, Alex left Emily sorting through the rest of the records and went to the kitchen to start the hot cocoa. With Dylan playing in the background, she couldn’t help but think of her dad. He was a big Dylan fan, although as far as she could tell, that’s where the similarities between Emily and her father ended. She missed him suddenly and resolved to give him a call. He wasn’t the only one she needed to catch up with, and she felt a wave of guilt realizing how bad she was at keeping in touch with her family. Maybe if she paid more attention to the people who already loved her, she wouldn’t feel like she needed anyone else to love.
Chapter Seventeen
Quieting the worries in her head didn’t seem possible, but Dylan had magic powers. Emily couldn’t remember the last time she’d simply sat and listened to a record, and it had been even longer since Dylan was her musician of choice.
The fire warmed the room, crackling as if in testament to Alex’s butch capabilities and giving her something to focus on besides alphabetizing the records. She finished her sorting and placed all the records back in the box, in order now, and moved from the floor to the couch. The smooth leather caressed her skin and made her wonder if Alex’s tastes were always expensive. Then she remembered French fries and pie. Alex seemed to have two sides: one with tailored suits and polished pickup lines, the other unapologetically dorky and sincere.
Emily shook her head. It didn’t matter how much she was drawn to Alex, even to the quirks of her personality. It didn’t matter how much she wanted Alex to be someone she could know in real life. Alex was a fantasy. One night in her cabin and then the fantasy would be over.
“Here’s your cocoa. Careful, it’s hot.”
Alex handed her the mug and then settled in on the sofa leaving at least a foot between them. She stared at the fire for a moment, holding her dark blue mug close to her chin but not drinking yet. Emily wondered what she was thinking. She hesitated asking what might seem too personal, but Alex was the one who wanted to talk. And maybe it would help her relax too.
“What are you thinking about?”
“That I don’t do this enough.” Alex sighed softly and brought the cocoa up to her lips.
“Have sex with random women you meet at a sex party?” Emily teased. “I don’t buy it.”
“You shouldn’t.” Alex chuckled. “What I meant was sit in front of a fire with no other agenda.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t slow down a lot to enjoy the little things.” Alex took another sip of her cocoa and then shifted back on the sofa. “I know you didn’t want to talk, but would it be a problem if we sit together for a while?”
“This is your fantasy. I’m here for whatever you want to do.” Emily immediately regretted her words. She felt the heat of a blush start racing up her neck as she added, “Well, maybe not whatever you want.”
“Noted.” Alex nodded at Emily’s mug. “Nervous about trying my cocoa?”
“More distracted than nervous.” Emily raised the mug and breathed in the steam. “It smells delicious.”
“Tastes even better.”
“Is that what you say to all the women?” Emily laughed when Alex rolled her eyes.
“Go on, try it. You’re killing me over here making me wait this long to find out if you like it.”
“I’m killing you? You’re the one who’s making me wait for sex in front of a fire.” Emily loved the way Alex was looking at her with a mix of desire and playful frustration. She wanted to prolong the moment, but the cocoa did smell good and her taste buds were getting impatient. She took the smallest of sips, letting only a little of the warm chocolate roll over her tongue. Closing her eyes, she savored the rich chocolate blending with a hint of Kahlua.
“So?”
Emily opened her eyes and met Alex’s gaze. “Earlier I was wondering what you would taste like, but now I’m thinking you’re going to have a hard time living up to this.” She took another sip, enjoying the smile she’d put on Alex’s face. “Kahlua and a little whipping cream?”
“You think I’m gonna give out my secrets that easy?”
Emily took a bigger sip, knowing she’d guessed at least partly right. “If I tell you this is the best cocoa I’ve ever had in my entire life, what do I get?”
“Keep stroking my ego and we’ll see.”
Emily felt a buzz that had nothing to do with the sugar—or the Kahlua. She knew she’d missed sex, but she realized now that it was foreplay she’d missed even more. The flirting that had an ulterior motive. The getting to know the someone who would later undress her. Someone whose desires openly matched hers. She gave her mug a swirl, sending the white foam on the top of the deep brown into a spin, then took another sip.
“Where do you hide the recipe?”
“You could search me for it. I wouldn’t stop you.”
Alex’s tone suggested she was only joking, but the thought of a strip search made Emily feel hot all over. She couldn’t imagine being brave enough to even unbutton Alex’s shirt. But what if she went for it?
“Are we listening to this dude all night?”
“This dude?” Emily tilted her head. “You got a problem with Dylan?”
Alex laughed. “Apparently not.”
“Good. Because, as I said, he’s an amazing songwriter and his music is classic.”
“And here I thought you liked his sexy voice.”
“Maybe I like that too.”
Alex cleared her throat and lowered her voice. “Hey. Wanna hang out with me?” She’d added a gravelly sound that was completely ridiculous, but the arched eyebrow topped the act.
Emily burst out laughing.
“So, I should keep talking like this?”
“How much do I have to pay you to stop?”
“A lot,” Alex said, still in the fake Dylan voice. She fell back on the couch cushions, laughing too.
“I may have to move some nonexistent money from my savings account into checking, but it’ll be worth it. How much?”
Alex stopped laughing but her smile didn’t fade. She met Emily’s gaze. “I like you.”
“So you’ve said. And I appreciate how honest and open you are with your…hmm…are they feelings or cravings?”
“Feelings,” Alex said. A moment later, she added, “And cravings.”
“Whatever it is, it’s good for me. It’s been a while since someone has looked at me the way you do.”
Alex seemed about to ask Emily to explain, but she only held her gaze. “Thank you for volunteering.”
“You’re welcome. Did you pick this fantasy because you thought I’d say yes?”
“Yes,” Alex said. “Well, I hoped you’d say yes. After dinner, I didn’t know about my chances with you. You’re a bit of a puzzle. One minute I think you want to jump my bones, and the next I think you hate me.”
“Pretty much, yeah.”
Alex shook her head. “What am I going to do with you?”
“I could give you some suggestions, but I think you’ll have even better ideas than I could come up with.”
“Is that so? Hmm. Maybe later we should compare notes.”
Emily smiled at the thought. She leaned back and took another sip of her cocoa. It hardly seemed possible, but she felt relaxed now. Sitting and
talking with Alex was more than nice. Her desire hadn’t changed—in fact her clit pulsed impatiently whenever she looked at Alex for long—but she was also okay waiting for what she knew would come soon. Besides, once they had sex, the fantasy would be over.
Hopefully she wouldn’t freeze up. Or be terrible. God, it had been so long since she’d gone down on a woman. She slid her tongue over her lips. The longing for that salty musky taste mixed with a plain old-fashioned fear of failure.
“Since you asked me, I’m gonna put you on the spot too. What are you thinking?”
“Right now?” Emily stalled.
Alex nodded. “I dare you not to lie.”
“I’m worried that I’m not going to be good. I’d like to knock your socks off, not because I think I’ll have any chance at being memorable, but…” She swallowed against the sudden lump in her throat. “I need a good memory to fall back on in case I’m celibate for another seven years. Vibrators only get you so far.”
Alex didn’t laugh at the joke. She set her mug down on the coffee table and turned sideways on the couch to face Emily. “Your music choice alone would make you memorable.”
“Great. Now I’ll be the Bob Dylan Girl, won’t I?” Emily joked again but she couldn’t believe Alex was unfazed by her comment about it being seven years since she’d had sex. Did she miss that part?
Alex continued. “You already knocked my socks off yesterday at the café. I’ll admit at first I was only thinking about how good-looking you were. You have a gorgeous smile and…other gorgeous things.”
Emily laughed. “Maybe I won’t ask what things you mean so we can keep pretending you’re chivalrous.”
“My point is there’s a lot more to you than the fact that you’re beautiful. You’re smart and you’re funny but you don’t tolerate bullshit. The way you put me in my place is so damn hot. At dinner and then when you volunteered even after I told you not to…” Alex hesitated like she wasn’t sure how to finish the sentence. After a moment, she said, “You make me want to earn taking you all the way. I’m the one who should be worrying about being memorable. I can already tell you’re not easy to impress.”
Emily felt shaky and hot all at the same time. She was turned on more than ever with Alex’s eyes holding hers, and the tension only seemed to build between them. If only Alex would kiss her. She needed her to make the first move. But Alex didn’t shift any closer and didn’t seem in a hurry to stop talking.
One Weekend in Aspen Page 13