Martha captured one of my hands between both of hers. “You won’t ever measure up to Luke because you aren’t Luke,” she said. “The only person you have to live up to, Ainsley, is yourself. I’ve had one Luke as a son-in-law, and he was an amazing person, much like Will. But, so are you. In a completely different way, yes, but the result is the same. You make my son happy. You make him laugh, something that’s been missing from him all these years. So, I don’t want you to be a Luke, because right now that’s not what he needs. Right now, he needs you. His beautiful, smart, funny, heart-of-a-gold boy who puts on his brave face, when I can tell you’re bottling up a lot of hurt.”
Chapter Fourteen
Will
“What's taking her so long?” I paced the length of the living room before turning to peer back at the entrance, hoping to see Mama. She had been up there far too long with Ainsley. I could have kicked myself in the rear for my reaction, or lack thereof in the truck. He had ended up with the wrong conclusion. I had just been caught off guard. After telling him about my intimate relationship with Luke, I had regretted it. What if he thought I wasn't adventurous enough for him? When he'd later decided we needed to talk, I had been worried he was about to say exactly that, call off our attempt to fool my family and leave me brokenhearted.
I never expected the words that came out of his mouth. His misconception of how I viewed him reminded me that despite the passion that blazed between us, there was still so much we didn't know about each other. There was still much about Ainsley I needed to unwrap.
“Patience, son,” Dad said from his position on the couch. “Your mother is good at this sort of stuff as I'm quite certain you recall.”
I passed a hand over my face, the five-o’clock shadow prickling my palm. “I know. I know. It's just that I don't want to screw this up.” I had that overwhelming feeling that if things didn't work out okay between Ainsley and me, I would never find happiness again. Not like this. The way we hit it off was unique. This sort of connection with someone did not happen every day.
“Son?” Dad's enquiring tone had me focusing on him and the serious expression he wore. “Do you see Ainsley?”
I groaned at him. “I'm not sure I understand the question.”
“It's quite simple really. Do you see his heart, the person he really is? Oh, he's a fun guy and all that, but your mother and I hope you see his vulnerable heart. It will be so easy for you to hurt him. Be sure that you don't.”
I shook my head slowly in wonder. My parents continued to amaze me so much. “Only you and Mama would worry about the other person in the relationship and not your kid. You guys are amazing.”
His face turned red under the compliment, and he waved a hand at me. “We taught you how to take care of yourself. You'll be fine.”
Just then Mama walked into the living room, Ainsley beside her. My heart skipped a beat at the red puffiness of his eyes. I was gutted I had made him cry. I hated seeing this vulnerable side of him, the way he held his knapsack by the straps in front him almost defensively. Didn't he know how I felt about him? That I would never intentionally hurt him? How would he know when you've never told him? I needed to get him alone so we could talk. Better yet, I could show him how much I wanted him, how much he didn't have to worry about me thinking badly of him?
“We won't see you again until after Christmas,” Mama said. “So Merry Christmas to you two, and drive safely tomorrow.”
I ended up hugging Dad and Mama, wishing them a Merry Christmas since I wouldn't be spending it with them this year. I had spent every Christmas with them since Luke's death.
“You take care of that boy,” Mama whispered in my ear as she hugged me. She pulled back and patted my cheek. “Be good to him. Do you hear me?”
I closed my eyes briefly, feeling grateful that they were in my life, and that Ainsley had them in his court. He looked like he had more need of my parents than I did. “Yes, ma’am. I will.”
I turned to Ainsley who still held his defensive stance. The distance between us was just a few steps, yet walking toward him felt like a thousand miles. I stopped before him, aware that my parents were probably watching us, but feeling like we were the only two people in the room. I reached for his hand. At first, I felt a little tug as he attempted to pull away, but at that second before I lost his touch, he reached across and grabbed onto my fingers like they were his lifeline. Only then did he raise his eyes, and I saw the spunk. My Ainsley had returned.
“Let’s go home,” I told him.
“Okay.”
We didn’t need words as we returned to my truck. I opened the door for him, and when he sat, I cupped the back of his head and kissed him softly. He dropped his bag, and pressed his hands to my chest, his heavy breathing turning into moans and pants.
I pulled back but remained standing outside the truck, my thumb tracing the outline of his perfect lips. I studied his face, the gentle slope of his jawline, the tilt of his nose, the blueness of his eyes, and his long lashes. I actually did a double take to check if his lashes were fake. They weren’t. He was nothing like Luke, and that was okay. Now I needed him to know that there was no way I would ever expect him to be someone he wasn’t. It was this Ainsley that attracted me.
After another brief kiss, I locked his door and went around to get in the vehicle. Once we were inside, I couldn't make a move without ensuring he understood what he meant to me and what I wanted from him.
“The only thing that matters right now, Ainsley, is right here and now with me,” I whispered. “I don’t expect you to be anybody else but who you are. I saw you for the first time, dashing across to the charging port at the airport in your heels, and I was crazy impressed. Then I spoke to you, and you made that ridiculous proposition that I couldn’t say no to. I know we started this off as a fake relationship, but I do believe that we have made this into something more. I’m willing to go all in with you if you want.”
When he didn't respond immediately, I backed out of the driveway and decided to give him some time to think about what I had said.
“I want to go all in,” he answered, licking his bottom lip. “In fact, I nearly came clean to your mother about us just now.”
I reached across his lap to grip his hand nearest to me and intertwined our fingers. “Let’s just enjoy the moment right now. When we get back from visiting your family, then we can tell them.”
He shifted closer to me to lay his head on my shoulder. “Your mom’s gonna chew us out for lying to her.”
I chuckled, feeling at ease once more with him so close to me. “Yes, and the worst part of it is that we’ll have to take everything she dishes us.”
“I can probably bribe her into forgiving us by gifting her with tickets to one of my fashion shows.” He raised his head from my shoulder. “In fact, there’s something I need to talk to you about. My agent called me today before I visited the clinic.”
“Yes?” Unlike earlier, I didn’t want to jump to conclusions about what that discussion had been about, so I waited for him to fill me in.
“I told him about you,” he admitted which took me by surprise. “Thomas got me this gig to walk the runway in a Paris fashion show for men. It’s a huge deal, and it’s one of those events I’ve been dreaming about since I started modeling.”
“Nice. Congrats.” I was happy for him. Really happy that he got to live his dreams. A part of me couldn’t help being wary too. What if when he left, he never returned? What if as soon as he got to New York, he returned to his life in the city as normal and forgot what we shared here? I pushed out the anxiety, determined to think positively about us. He could pursue his dreams within the parameters of our relationship, and I would be supportive.
“Thanks. I can’t believe he pulled it off.”
“When do you have to go?” I asked him, trying to go for a flippant tone so he didn’t realize my slight worry.
“He wanted me to return to New York immediately,” he answered. “But I told him I couldn’
t. Not yet. I already made a commitment to my parents. And also to you.”
“But you can’t give up this opportunity,” I said on a frown. “You’ve worked too hard for this Ainsley, and I can see you enjoy what you do. You deserve to explore your dreams to the fullest.”
I turned onto my street and then we were driving up the driveway to my house. I released Ainsley’s hand and punched the button to open the garage door. Luke’s car which I never bothered to sell was still in the garage. As I saw it, I wondered why I had insisted on keeping it. I could have given it to someone who had more use for it, but I had clung to it as I had almost every little piece of him that I could have salvaged.
“I’m glad you feel that way because I’m not giving up my career,” he remarked. “I think we can find our way around it, don’t you?”
I parked beside the car in the garage and shut off the ignition. “Sure, we will. You’ll have your career in modeling and me.”
“And you’ll have me,” he answered, wrinkling his nose. ‘I think you got the better deal.”
Ah, it was good to see my Ainsley back. I unlocked my door and went around to open up for him. He grabbed his knapsack and slid out of the van. Before I could fathom what scheme he had up his sleeves, he jumped at me. I caught him automatically, and he wrapped his legs around my waist, wearing a suggestive smile on his lips that made my cock swell.
“You’re right,” I told him, my eyes zeroed in on his lips. “I did get the better end of the deal.”
Ainsley wrapped his arms around my neck, and we kissed. I was slightly taken aback by the aggressiveness in him, but I loved it. His throaty moans and pants stoked my desire for him. With a groan, I spun with him in my arms and grasped his shapely buns. I squeezed and released, and his head fell back, lips glistening wet from our kisses.
“Willy,” he moaned, burying his face into my neck and kissing my skin.
I wanted to bury my cock deep inside him, and given his confession, I knew he wouldn’t mind, which only served to make the desire more acute. But I had spent all day around animals, and when I was deep inside him, it should just be us. Our kisses. Our touches. Our scents. Our sounds that kept us in the moment.
I tore my lips away from his, and with Ainsley still in my arms, headed for the door which led to the house.
Chapter Fifteen
Will
“You can put me down now,” Ainsley said, squirming as I walked through the hall with him still in my arms. He was a featherweight, and I had no intention of letting him go until we were in my bathroom.
“Soon enough,” I promised him, then pinched his ass when he continued to squirm.
“Oww!” he cried, and I rubbed my hand over the area to smooth the sting. “What did you do that for?”
“For you to stop wiggling.”
“I do not wiggle!” Yet, he chose that exact moment to wiggle in my arms again. “I may sashay on occasion and strut, but I never wiggle!”
Instead of pinching him this time, I changed the way I held him, tossing him over my shoulder as I started to climb the stairs. “Maybe now you'll behave?”
“Me behave? Should you be so lucky.” He made an oooh sound and then his hands were on my ass, feeling me up. “Hmm, I want a taste of these. Do you enjoy rimming?”
I missed a step at his question but corrected the mishap before I could do damage. “I enjoy giving it,” I answered.
“And receiving?”
I was glad he was upside down so I didn't have to watch his reaction at my answer. “I've never been on the receiving end.”
He went quiet and still in my arms. I carried him effortlessly into the master bedroom which seemed a bit odd with the photos of Luke put away. I had done it this morning when I got home from spending the night with Ainsley. I didn't remove them all. Our wedding portrait was still on the wall in the hall and there was another of us on the mantle in the living room. I had no intention of forgetting my late husband, but it was about time I stopped making the place a shrine.
I didn't pause inside the bedroom but went through the adjoining door to the bathroom.
“Holy crap!” Ainsley cried as I set him back on his feet. His eyes were wide as he took in the luxury bathroom. Then he giggled and clapped his hands to his mouth.
“I knew you had a decadent side. Apparently, this is it.”
I glanced at the bathroom and smiled. “Yeah. I've always wanted a luxury bathroom so the moment we could afford it, we got it redone.”
My eyes flickered to him to see if he was offended by me including Luke in the conversation. He didn't seem to mind. He was still enraptured at the sight of the bathroom.
“Oh my God, Willy, I love your parents to death, but I'm not staying with them anymore when I know you have this. No freaking way!”
I laughed at his excitement, then the laughter got stuck in my throat as he started ripping off his clothes. With his back to me, I got a healthy view of his rear as he shimmied his hips out of his jeans and underwear. I forgot how to breathe. His buns were perfect round globes that had me itching to get grabby with him. He hadn’t mentioned that he also had a tat of the word queer written in the colors of the pride flag smack on his ass. I wanted to use my tongue to trace each letter of the word before I made my way to his crack.
As if what he was doing wasn’t tempting enough, Ainsley bent from the waist to remove his high-tops. I gasped and almost choked on the sudden spurt of air flying down my windpipe. Given the way he was bent over, I could see just a hint of pink puckered flesh between his cheeks teasing me. He was clean-shaved and opened for viewing, an art piece on exhibition, and I’d buy out the entire gallery just to keep going back alone.
My cock sprung a hardon, tenting my jeans as I continued to watch Ainsley undress without misgiving. He gave off the nonchalant air of a guy who was comfortable with his body. With his jeans off, he finally straightened and tugged his shirt over his head. That tat of the poison ivy running down his spine was the coolest thing I ever saw. Until he turned to face me, and I checked out the rest of his body.
Ainsley was svelte perfection, his pale skin, unblemished. Small flat nipples formed points in his slender chest void of hair. His stomach was flat with just the slightest hint of muscles beneath. He had a small waist, narrow hips, and lanky legs. I finally allowed my gaze to land on his erect cock he was gently stroking. His hand ran down his shaft revealing the silver piercings at the tip of his cock.
“Ainsley,” I choked out his name. “Holy fuck, Ainsley.”
“Glad to know the striptease worked,” he said on a smirk. “But you have way too much on. I want you to be entirely naked when you’re deep inside me.”
His words conjured up all sorts of imagery, but I wanted the real thing. “The condom and lube?” I croaked out. If he didn’t have them still, we would be screwed. I didn’t have any at the house since I hadn't been with anyone in so long.
“Get undressed,” he remarked, snagging his jeans from the floor to rifle through the pocket for the condom and lube. “When you’re ready to get naughty then you can join me.”
He didn’t head for the Jacuzzi but the ceiling to floor glass shower. He disappeared inside, placed the condom and lube on a shelf of the shower caddy and adjusted the temperature of the showerhead. I reached for my shirt and tugged over my head while I continued watching him. He didn’t look at me any at all but reached for the bar of soap to get lathered. I removed my shoes and socks slowly, reaching for the buckle of my belt to finish undressing. I was in no haste as I watched him rubbing his hands over his body. My jeans were at my knees when he slipped a hand backward to wash his ass. He moved toward the shower bench, one leg perched on top of it as he reached back to rub soapy fingers over his crack. A finger disappeared into his hole, his head rolled back, his body bowing and beckoning to me.
The rest of my clothes flew off in a flash. Completely naked, I entered the shower after him.
“Have you come to watch or to play?” he purred at
me.
“Both,” I answered, reaching for the soap from him. “Don’t stop on my account.”
I didn’t take my eyes off him as I washed up in record timing. I wasn’t the only one checking him out either. His eyes were fastened on my hands washing my cock. I lingered over my flesh, stroking even when I knew I was squeaky clean.
“You're a helluva tease, Willy,” he said, licking his lips. “You know where I want it, don't you?”
The raw hunger with which he observed me did crazy things to my insides. Desiring him made sense. Ainsley was just one of those guys who could tempt a straight man to experiment. He could drive a saint to their knees. But the open desire in his eyes for me was unexpected. Seeing it so raw and blatant on his face only magnified my own desire.
“Show me,” I challenged him.
Turning his back to me, Ainsley showed me his ass. There was no shyness in him, only wanton abandon as he reached back to cup his round cheeks. My cock throbbed at his playfulness, squeezing, lifting and releasing his cheeks. His buns jiggled just a bit when he released, and my mouth went dry. He bit his lower lip, a smirk on his face as he lifted his cheeks again. This time he spread them apart and squeezed.
I nearly jizzed just from staring at Ainsley's puckered entrance. His really puckered entrance. And for all my intentions of not comparing, I couldn't help it. Because of the lack of frequency of penetrative sex with Luke, he had always been tight to the point of discomfort for him and torture for me. Ainsley hadn't been kidding about enjoying penetrating sex. My balls tightened as my cock took over from my brain. All I wanted was to be deep inside him, but for a fleeting second, I also experienced the terror of never wanting to let him go afterward.
“Don’t move,” I rasped at him. With two strides I was behind him, but I didn't touch him. I had no idea where to begin. He inclined his head toward me and the smirk on his face died.
Unwrapping Ainsley Page 10