by Ivy Smoak
“Tell me you haven’t thrown me away!” Matt sang as he ran across the field, picking up his pace. “You’re not a game and I’m sorry. You are the only one. I love you, Brooklyn.” He chucked the mic on the field and sprinted toward the gym, Coach Carter hot on his trail. The principal had stopped at the 30 yard line, panting hard, his hands on his knees.
The stadium erupted in cheers that were just as loud as when the Eagles had scored a touchdown.
“If that’s not an apology I don’t know what is,” Kennedy said.
It was a grand gesture, just like she’d said. Matt was not a good singer. Or dancer. And he’d just done both in front of the biggest crowd I could imagine, despite the fact that the principal was pissed. What was more public than that? I wasn’t his dirty little secret anymore. He wanted me back. I wasn’t sure if he had up until this point, but it was pretty clear now.
I felt Miller’s eyes on the back of my neck, pricking my skin. The question was…did I want Matt back? The smile on my face screamed yes. My heart that was still in pieces? That was a different story.
“That was seriously the most amazing thing ever,” Kennedy said. She snapped a picture of me and pulled the camera away from her face. “I haven’t seen you this happy in forever. This is going to be the best homecoming ever. Do you think he has anything else planned for the dance? Can you even imagine how he’d top that?”
I nodded, but I wasn’t really listening. I was doing my best not to look over to see if Mrs. Caldwell was staring at me. Or the Pruitts for that matter.
I watched as things calmed down on the field and the homecoming king and queen were crowned. James Hunter and Isabella Pruitt. Figures. I stared at the two of them. James looked so drunk I doubted he’d remember a minute of this. Did no one else notice? And then there was Isabella, who looked…furious. We locked eyes for a second and I felt myself sinking. She was definitely upset. And it was directed fully on me. Why was she mad at me?
Her anger slowly shifted to a smile as pictures started to snap. She flipped her hair over her shoulder and jutted out her hip like she hadn’t just given me a death stare. She even leaned over and kissed James on the cheek, much to his dismay. He looked like he was going to be sick. I would have maxed out my untouched credit card to see him throw up on her cheerleading outfit. But he didn’t. He just looked so freaking sad. Like his heart had been stomped on too.
I didn’t want their life. I wanted a little house in Delaware with a yellow kitchen. I didn’t want to be Untouchable. I just wanted to be loved. And Matt had just sung about loving me. I pictured him and his friends thrusting again and I laughed out loud. What the hell had he been thinking?
Chapter 23
Saturday
We were stuck in traffic in the small parking lot at Empire High for what seemed like centuries. And sitting in the car with Miller after Matt’s performance wasn’t exactly fun. I breathed a sigh of relief when Miller was finally able to pull the car out of the parking lot.
Kennedy was busy going through pictures on her camera. I turned to look out the window and could still see the team celebrating in the distance. They’d sat Matt for the third quarter, but let him play again in the fourth. Empire High had lost the lead while he was benched. I was pretty sure that was the only reason they let Matt back on the field. But we’d ended up winning by a landslide.
The game was a great distraction. It was easy to get caught up in the cheers, which were surprisingly easy to learn. And Kennedy filled me in about some things I didn’t know about the game, like being offsides. Starting too soon…maybe that’s what I’d done with Matt. I started something with him too soon after I lost my mom. I needed more time to heal. That’s why my heart was so confused. Because it was still broken.
“Check this one out,” Kennedy said and showed me the display on her camera. It was an image of Matt thrusting.
I couldn’t help but laugh. It was ridiculous. The smile on Matt’s face was contagious and my cheeks hurt from all the pictures she kept showing me. But I could feel Miller’s eyes on me in the rearview mirror. And the awkward tension in the air seemed to grow with each laugh.
Miller had been so professional since walking us down the stands. Not one personal comment even though the three of us had talked the whole car ride to the game. I knew Kennedy felt the awkwardness too. But she was trying to drown it out with funny pictures. It was homecoming. We were supposed to be laughing and having fun. The twisted feeling in my stomach seemed like all I ever felt anymore. And I was so tired of it.
“I’m really sorry, Miller,” I said. “That was so awkward. Can we just pretend that didn’t happen?”
He let his eyes travel to the rearview mirror for a second before looking back at the road. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for. Consider it forgotten if that’s what you want.”
“Are you planning on serenading Brooklyn now?” Kennedy asked. “To level the playing field?”
“Brooklyn knows how I feel,” he said and hit the turn signal.
I absolutely did not know how he felt. Most nights when he held me he’d just let me talk about my awful day. He was really good at listening. Not so much at sharing. He was literally my shoulder to cry on. And I hadn’t been very good at returning the favor. If I really thought about it, I barely knew him at all. How had that happened? I was pretty sure he knew everything about me.
“And how do you feel, Miller?” Kennedy asked, as if she could read my mind.
“Right this second?” He focused on the road. “I feel like my patience is wearing thin.”
Kennedy laughed.
I didn’t. It had to have been hard to watch Matt sing to me.
“I really think a grand romantic gesture would do you well after that performance,” Kennedy said. “Maybe you could choreograph a dance with the other security guards! That would be so much fun.”
“Actually bothering to show up is the best gesture,” Miller said.
I jumped in, hoping to end the awkwardness. “Agreed.”
“Sick burn on Matt,” Kennedy said.
I saw a hint of a smile on Miller’s face at my agreement. He was right. Matt dancing was wonderfully public and hilarious. But it didn’t really change anything. He had still slept with his best friend’s girlfriend. And yes, he still tried to call and text me, but he stopped showing up to school. He stopped showing up for me. He’d never shown up for me before that either. I was a dirty little secret, despite what he sang. Miller, on the other hand, was always there. He was solid like a rock. Literally. I stared at the way his muscles bulged beneath his suit jacket. He’d never let anything bad ever happen to me again. All Matt did was make bad things happen to me, sprinkled with moments that tricked my mind into forgetting. But I wasn’t an idiot.
“Well, if you can really sneak me into the Pruitt’s apartment, that’s a pretty grand gesture all by itself,” Kennedy said. “This is going to be so much fun.” She elbowed me in the ribcage.
This really was going to be fun. I took a deep breath. Tonight was going to be the best night ever.
***
Sneaking in turned out to not be hard. At all. Despite the traffic, we’d beaten Mr. and Mrs. Pruitt back in record time. All we had to do now was get safely to my room. Sneaking back out would be harder, but we’d deal with that little hiccup later.
I tried to pull Kennedy through the foyer but her feet had frozen in place.
“This place is…” her voice trailed off as she turned in a circle.
“Cold? Over the top? Massive? Vulgar?”
She laughed. “No. It’s…haunting,” she finally said as she eyed a portrait of the Pruitt family above a vase Mrs. Pruitt hadn’t gotten a chance to smash yet.
Her words sent a chill down my spine. Or maybe it was just the dead look in Isabella’s eyes when they were so blown up. Or maybe it was because it felt like someone was watching me.
“You two should get up to Brooklyn’s room before they come back,” Miller said. He handed
Kennedy her homecoming dress.
Kennedy folded her dress over her arm. “Yeah, I really don’t want to run into Isabella outside of school if I can help it.”
Welcome to my new life. “Her bedroom is on the other wing upstairs. I actually run into her less here than at school.” Now that I thought about it, that was pretty weird. It was like she avoided me here but sought me out in public. A game she played for her father, I guessed. Our father. You’d think she’d pretend to like me here right in front of him. And the more I thought about it, the less any of it made sense. I’d never understand Isabella. And I never wanted to, because if I did I was worried it meant I was truly becoming one of them.
“But you see her at family dinners,” Kennedy said. “I love those stories. I can’t believe your life now.”
“Oh God, don’t get me started on family dinners,” I said with a laugh.
“Can I see the dining room real quick? I want to be able to picture your epic stories of the upper class better.”
“The Pruitts just pulled up,” Miller said as he looked down at something on his phone. “You have about three and a half minutes until they come in. Make it fast and I’ll go get your dress from my room.” He walked away without waiting for a response, suddenly all business.
I wasn’t sure if he was upset with me or not. Maybe he was just tense because he was putting his neck on the line by letting me sneak Kennedy in.
“The dining room is this way.” I grabbed Kennedy’s hand so she wouldn’t keep stopping and staring at everything along the way.
“Why is your dress in Miller’s room?” she asked as we stopped outside the dining room.
“It’s silly. I thought maybe Isabella was trying to sabotage me or something. But maybe she really was worried we’d be wearing the same color.” The feeling of being watched all the time was getting to me. I was even making up evil moves by Isabella. She was horrible. But it didn’t mean she was out to get me all the time. Surely she had other people she had to harass. Her list of enemies was probably quite long.
“The same color dress for homecoming? Oh the horror,” Kennedy said with a laugh. “Which wall did Satan throw the wine on when he got mad?”
I laughed and pointed to the far wall. Kennedy loved hearing stories about Mr. Pruitt, and I loved reenacting all of it for her. I’m pretty sure hearing about my horrid living situation was the highlight of her day. And I was happy to give her all the dirty details because they distracted her from Cupcake. And his assholery.
“He seems legit crazy,” she said.
“Yeah, and you legit don’t want to run into him. I have no idea what his reaction would be. He pretty much banned me from seeing you. And I signed all these papers agreeing to it.” I think. I really should have read that contract.
She rolled her eyes. “How can I hate someone that I don’t even know?”
“Easily when it’s a Pruitt,” I said with a laugh. “But come on, let’s get upstairs. The last thing I need is to get Miller fired.”
She followed me up the ornate staircase. “This place is seriously insane. I can’t believe you live around all this gold.” She ran her index finger along the gold trim of the railing.
“Isn’t that just paint?”
She leaned down and tapped it with her finger. “I don’t think so.”
The sound of locks clicking open echoed around us.
“Hurry,” I whispered and sprinted up the stairs with Kennedy hot on my trail. But when I reached my room I realized that Kennedy wasn’t with me. She had stopped in front of the door down the hall with the new security system.
“What the hell is in there?” she asked as she stared at the keypad.
“I have no idea.”
“You haven’t asked? It’s right by your room.”
“Miller said not to go in. Which I promptly ignored,” I said with a laugh. “But it was locked when I tried to open it. And the next thing I knew there was all this,” I said and pointed to the display.
“That’s really freaking creepy, Brooklyn. What do you think is in there that they don’t want you to see?”
I shrugged. “I’m sure Miller would warn me if it was something really bad.”
“Yeah. You’re probably right.” But she didn’t look that convinced.
I didn’t have time to think about what was behind that door right now. All I could think about was the fact that I couldn’t get Miller fired. I’d never be able to forgive myself. Especially because my heart was still so stupidly confused.
This time when I pulled Kennedy to my room she didn’t protest. I practically pushed her in when I heard the sound of footsteps on the stairs. I was about to close and lock my door, but I heard her gasp.
I turned around to see what she was upset about. My heart dropped to the floor.
“What the hell happened in here?” asked Kennedy.
My clothes. All the beautiful clothes that Justin had organized for me were on the floor in shreds. Thousands and thousands of dollars worth of clothes that were so nice that I hadn’t even touched them. I swallowed hard. It wasn’t just all my new clothes. No. I took a few steps into my room and I felt like I was about to burst into tears. The few outfits that I’d owned were ruined too. The sundress my mom had always complimented. Her old riding boots. My favorite pajamas. Even my black dress shoes that hurt my feet. Everything. It was all torn to pieces.
All I could think about was how lucky I was to have been wearing my Keds. I was never going to take them off again.
“Seriously, what the hell happened?” Kennedy asked as she wandered toward the mess. She lifted up a pair of designer jeans. “They look like they were cut with scissors.”
“What?” I walked up and looked down at the mess. The rips were precise. Perfect. Planned.
“Oh no, Sissy,” Isabella said from behind us with zero shock in her voice.
Kennedy and I both spun around to look at her.
She was holding a tiny, fluffy white dog in her arms. The smile on her face was eerily calm. She slowly stroked the fluffy dog like a psychopath as her smile grew. “Sir Wilfred must have accidentally gotten into your room.”
“Sir Wilfred?” I asked. Had she had a secret dog this whole time? I hadn’t heard a single bark.
“Yes, isn’t he such a cutie pie?” She scratched behind his ears.
“When did you get a dog?”
“I got him this morning as a reward for my good behavior. Daddy always lets me get whatever I want when I’m good. Because he loves me the most.”
I was going to be sick.
Isabella walked farther into my room. Just her standing here made the room feel less safe. She was invading my space. And I knew for a fact it wasn’t the first time. A dog didn’t do this. Like Kennedy had said, it looked like my clothes had been cut into perfect pieces with scissors. They hadn’t been shredded by dog claws and teeth. I’d been right. Isabella was trying to sabotage me. But why’d she even bother asking what dress I was wearing when she was planning on ruining everything and blaming it on an innocent dog?
Isabella lifted up what was left of the emerald green dress I’d described to her the other day at dinner. “Sissy, your homecoming dress is ruined. And all your other dresses too.” She dropped the dress on top of my other shredded clothes. “I guess you can’t go to homecoming after all.” She shook her head like she was actually upset. The smile on her face was proof that she wasn’t. “What. A. Shame. Oh well.” She turned to walk away.
“You’re such a bitch,” Kennedy said. “These clothes were cut with scissors. Obviously.” She picked up a shirt that was cut in half. “You did this.”
“Are you calling me a liar?”
“If the shoe fits.”
Isabella continued to pet her dog. “At least I have shoes. It looks like Sir Wilfred got to all of Brooklyn’s.” She stifled a laugh. “Such a shame. Wait, what are you even doing here, Kennedy?” A vicious smile spread across her face. “Daddy!” she screamed at the top of her
lungs. “Daddy there’s an intruder!”
“Stop yelling,” I hissed. I could handle all my clothes being destroyed by a monster. What I couldn’t handle was getting Kennedy kicked out and Miller fired. What the hell had I been thinking bringing Kennedy here? Of course we’d be caught. “Please, Isabella, I’ll do whatever you want. Go tell your dad that everything’s fine. Tell him not to come up.”
“Whatever I want?” she asked.
“Anything. Please.”
But it was too late.
Mr. Pruitt was standing at the door with a frown on his face.
Chapter 24
Saturday
“Sorry, Daddy,” Isabella said with a smile. “Everything’s fine. It’s just Brooklyn’s friend. I was mistaken.”
He didn’t seem to care what she said. “Where is Miller?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” I said. “I snuck Kennedy in on my own though. It wasn’t his fault.” I stepped in front of Kennedy as if that would save her from his wrath.
“Not his fault? It’s his job to watch you 24/7.”
Miller was watching me 24/7? What? I tried to shake away his comment. That wasn’t important right now. “I’m sorry I snuck her in,” I said. “But…”
“Did your little friend do this?” he asked and gestured to my destroyed clothes.
“What? Of course Kennedy didn’t do this. It was like this when we got here. It was…”
“It was Sir Wilfred,” Isabella said, cutting me off. She gave me a death stare. I didn’t dare contradict her when she was staring at me like that. I’d heard Mr. Pruitt loud and clear the other day. Isabella had murdered people before. I think. And I just wanted to go to homecoming, not land six feet under.
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure it was Sir Wilfred,” I said.
Mr. Pruitt shook his head. “Isabella, I told you that you had to keep him in your room while he’s being trained. We talked about this.”
“I’m sorry, Daddy. He must have slipped out when Anderson came in to clean. I told you we should fire her. She’s horrid help. This is all her fault. Not mine. And not poor Sir Wilfred’s. He didn’t know any better. But Anderson did.”