by Kay Loren
Nikolai smiled as he thought about the baby inside of Audrina. It was his baby no matter what.
Audrina kissed Nikolai’s hand repeatedly and brought it up to her cheek. “I thought you were dead.”
Nikolai swallowed the lump in his throat. He didn’t want to admit that he felt the very same. “It would take more than two bullets to kill me.”
She chewed her bottom lip and looked up at him. “Everything was true.”
“What was true?”
She took in a deep breath before she began. “I went over to Steve’s office the other day and he told me all the details of my family’s past. Apparently my father, or grandfather, ordered your death but when he couldn’t reach you, he settled for your mother or Svetlana. He said my mother went over to his office and asked Steve’s father to talk to my father to stop the kill before it could happen but it was too late.
“My mother knew her father in law had messed up so she began the proceedings to have all traces of me erased. To protect me from you and your family and every other crime family in the East,” she shuddered before she continued. “You finding me and us together was never supposed to happen. Your dad thought he killed the Cathan heir too but it was actually a cousin of mine. That’s all I know.”
Nikolai swallowed the lump in is throat. Audrina was right. Because of their parents, their future together was potentially fucked up. He wondered if they could try to move past it someway… somehow.
She leaned over and placed her lips to his, consuming him completely. Despite his oncoming grogginess he kissed her back. The electricity between them two and the connection they shared was undeniable.
She sat back in her chair. “Nothing has changed. At least for me. I still love you.”
He sighed and squeezed her hand. From the blank look in his eyes there was no telling what he was thinking from where she sat, awaiting his response.
She placed her head in his hand and wept silently. “I know it must be hard to say it back to me, especially after all the revelations, but I’m so sick of the death, lies and everything else that I just want to be honest for once and say exactly how I’m feeling… I love you.”
He soaked up her heartfelt plea and after a few moments shook his head. Her eyes widened at his reaction but then sighed in relief when he offered her a small smile.
“I don’t want either of us to pay for our father’s mistakes,” he said. “What they did, we will never understand why.”
She wanted to speak but he silenced her with a shake of his head. After a deep breath he said, “I fell in love with Audrina Day. The girl who dances and makes love to me like no other. Not Juliette Cathan. I don’t know her and I can’t forgive a blameless child… I love you Audrina,” he whispered. “You… And I think we can take some sort of solace in the fact that despite their actions, fate for whatever reason, brought you and I together.”
She wept into the hand that now cradled her cheek and kissed his palm. “Does that mean you still feel the same about me?”
He smiled as wide as he could. “If it’s possible I love you even more… with my entire soul.”
She leaned over and kissed him again. He brought his hand to the back of her head and pressed her closer, deepening the kiss, feeling every bit of love he already had for her intensify. She gasped and put a hand to her belly, grinning.
“What is it?” he asked trying to sit up but she placed a hand on his shoulder to keep him laying down. She took his hand and placed it over her belly. He gasped when he too felt the baby kicking.
“What does it feel like?” he smiled.
“I don’t know how to describe it,” she smiled. “It’s like a flutter feeling.”
Just then, Sergei waltzed into the room and smiled gratefully seeing that Nikolai had finally woken up. He handed Audrina a cup which she took gratefully and sipped.
“Thank God you’re awake,” he said and came over to the side of the bed where Audrina sat on her chair. “I don’t know how you do it Nik, but I can’t stand taking over everything. We need you to hurry up and get better so you can come back and deal with everything.”
Audrina looked down at the floor and sipped her tea. She didn’t want no part in their talk but she didn’t want to leave Nikolai either. I may as well get used to it…
“Anything worth knowing?” Nikolai asked.
Sergei glanced over at Audrina for a quick moment and then said to Nikolai in Russian, “All your enemies are gone for the moment.”
“Good,” Nikolai nodded. He knew he had a few lurking in the shadows waiting for him but he didn’t want to entertain the thought now. He just wanted to hurry and get better and get out of the damned hospital.
Sergei reached inside his jacket and pulled out an envelope and handed it to Audrina. She smiled and took the paper and shoved it into her bag.
“What is that?” Nikolai asked.
“Nothing,” Sergei and her both shook their heads after giving each other a secret smile. Nikolai eyed her for a moment before she gave him a reassuring smile.
“How’s Alek?” Nikolai asked, the pain in his body subsiding a bit.
“He’s fine,” Sergei nodded. “He has three broken ribs and a broken arm but he’s great. Olga and Svetlana won’t let him out of their sight.”
Nikolai looked over to Audrina again who looked down at the floor with a frown. Something was eating away at her and he wanted to know what it was. He waved Sergei out and then reached his hand out for hers.
She still looked down at the floor with furrowed brows, lost in her thoughts.
“Audrina,” he whispered.
She turned to him with a small smile. “Yeah?”
“What is on your mind?”
“Nothing,” she shook her head after another sip of tea.
“Tell me.”
She played with the ring on her middle finger. Nikolai had never seen her wear any jewelry before apart from small earrings or a bracelet but she had on this shiny ring that caught his eye.
“Everyone who was after the stupid fortune is either dead or seriously injured because of it… If they would have really known what was actually left behind, this may have all been avoided,” she said.
“What are you talking about?”
She exhaled and pressed her lips together. Then she chuckled and looked to him with her mesmerizing gaze. "Diana, my mother, broke off pieces of the fortune in the last few months of her life in order to buy herself some time and assure herself some protection… after all that… all that was left was a few million and this,” she said and placed her hand closer for him to inspect.
He took her warm hand in his and looked at the brilliance of the round, ruby stone set on a gold band surrounded by diamonds. The ring looked vintage but shined like it had just been polished and crafted that very day.
“It is beautiful.”
She looked down at her hand and pressed her lips together. “But that’s all that was left… I just wish I knew sooner and maybe you wouldn’t have been hurt and everybody else would not have died.”
Nikolai squeezed her hand. “It doesn’t matter. It would have happened all the same.”
“It didn’t even matter who I was married to,” she whispered. “The fortune could only be released to me and me only… The things Michael made me sign… were declared invalid. I signed them as Audrina Daye, not Juliette Cathan.”
Thoughts of Carlo and Michael swarmed Nikolai’s mind. Dumb bastards.
“Something inside of me is just telling me that she did all this to make sure I stayed alive but I don’t know that for certain… I’ll never know…”
“I think your mother like mine did what they could do to protect their children,” he stated lowly. “Children shouldn’t have to pay in a man’s war.”
She stroked her belly and frowned. He may not have known what she was thinking half the time but he knew what thought crossed her mind now.
He put a hand to her belly again. “This is my child.”
He cut her off. “No more. I don’t want to talk nothing more of the past. What matters is right now.”
She smiled. “This moment… and this,” she placed her hand over his that still rested on her belly. He smiled remembering he had told her those exact same words many nights before.
She kissed him once more before settling in the chair once again. The morphine was making him sleepy now yet he had to tell her one last thing seeing her in that yellow dress.
“I never told you why yellow was my favorite color did I?”
“Never,” she shook her head with a small smile.
“My mother used to wear yellow a lot and she looked like the sun,” he whispered his eyes slowly closing. “Like you, she was dazzling.”
Chapter forty- one
One Year Later
The blue eyed baby with the dark hair slept peacefully in the car seat in between Nikolai and Audrina while Sergei drove them around. Audrina had never been more content than she was in that moment, in between her child and newly wed husband.
She looked down at her wedding ring, a gorgeous, oval diamond on a platinum band with a few sparkly diamonds on each side. Above that sat a lone diamond band, the one he placed around her finger the day he married her. She remembered her wedding day two months back vividly.
It was a small ceremony. Not many people. Nikki and Svetlana were her bridesmaids while Sergei and Alek served as Nikolai’s groomsmen. The only people in attendance were Olga, Jeana, her husband Jack, Konstantin, Dr. Jones, Emma, Valdik, a few security men that Nikolai heavily trusted, and their daughter, Anastasia.
The wedding was beautiful, simple and just the way Audrina wanted. They had married on Nikolai’s property in the lush garden of the backyard and feasted afterward on the dinner that Olga had insisted she specially prepare and cook for that day. Svetlana wanted to really party it up, so Nikolai hired a family DJ to turn the indoor pool room into a party room. Svetlana really made the night fun, getting everyone drunk and throwing them into the pool.
“You have to drink too Audri!” Svetlana said, shoving another glass of champagne into Audrina’s hand. “It’s your wedding day!”
“I am,” Audrina lied and secretly passed the glass to either Alek or Nikki. One glass was enough for her.
Svetlana pulled Audrina close to her ear and whispered, “I’m so happy everything is now as it should be… I just wish our parents could have been here though.”
Audrina could only agree with Svetlana. It was a sore in her heart that she could not tell her the whole truth. She had pressed Nikolai months before if they should tell everyone what truly happened and how their pasts were always tied together but he insisted that it did not matter.
“There is no use digging up past wounds my love,” he assured her a few nights before they wed. “Especially when there is so much to look forward to in the future.”
Alek had agreed and though he heard everything that had happened that night in the room while they were bound, he never mentioned one word. Audrina was glad that she shared a special bond with Alek. They never talked about what had happened that night but it brought them closer together. So close that Nikolai had made Alek head of Audrina and Anastasia’s security when Alek insisted that no one could do a better job.
But the most important thing of all to Audrina was that she had made sure everything was perfect and squared away right before they had gotten married. What was left of the fortune, she had put away and destroyed all documents with the Cathan name. All except the pictures of her mother that she had put away in a safe.
When it came to Michael, she had cut all ties and refused to attend his service although his nonna insisted she come. There was no one left of the Mancini crime family to mourn Michael, except for his nonna and Carmella who took care of her now that Michael was gone. Nikolai had attended under an alias and promised to help take care of Michael’s grandma financially, despite his bad blood with Michael but Carmella declined on her behalf and sent him off.
But when it came to Tatiana, Nikolai was a bit more harsh. He had her cremated and no one ever knew what he did with the remains. As soon as he was declared a widow, he proposed to Audrina and refused to ever bring up Tatiana again.
Audrina waited a few months after she gave birth to wed while giving Nikolai time to heal from his injuries. And even though in her heart she knew Anastasia was Nikolai’s, she wanted to make extra sure and get a test.
There was no denying those blue eyes on Anastasia’s chubby face nor the dark curls in her hair. The baby resembled Nikolai through and through although he always said that the baby inherited the beautiful outlines of Audrina’s face.
She remembered after a long labor of sixteen hours, they doctor opting for a C- section and her being terrified but Nikolai was right there every single minute and he held the baby for the very first time. She had never seen him happier than in that moment. And boy, was he the best father anyone could ask for.
He had his room remodeled two months before the baby arrived so that a door from their room would lead into the nursery he had specially built and Audrina would not have to worry so much. He did everything to make sure the baby’s needs as well as Audrina’s were met. When Audrina was tired he took over and when he got home from his day’s work he doted on the baby.
And as a husband, there was no comparison. He doted on Audrina just the same and while she healed from the c- section, he took care of her just like she did for him while he was recovering. The memory of when he had woken up early to make her breakfast while caring for the baby brought a smile to her face.
He had the baby in his arms, crying, while he expertly whisked batter into a silver bowl and moved around the kitchen all while holding the baby.
“What are you doing?” Audrina asked when she entered the kitchen.
“What are you doing,” he retorted with a bewildered expression. “Get back into bed! You need to rest!”
Audrina went up to him and took the baby from his arms. “All I’ve been doing is resting and breast feeding. I need to get out of bed. And you? What were you going to do? Cook and hold the baby at the same time?”
Nikolai looked over to the bassinet he had carried all the way down the stairs and shrugged. “No.”
Audrina followed his gaze and giggled. She knelt up on her tip toes and kissed him. “You’re not super man my love. And I’m not some fragile glass doll. And this baby is too spoiled already. She’s already having you picking her up every time she cries.”
“I don’t want to see her cry,” he explained.
“She’s a baby,” Audrina stated and sat on one of the stools at the counter, comforting the baby to sleep. “Babies cry. What is she going to learn from you picking her up every time she throws a fit? That daddy will come to her rescue?”
“Yes.”
Audrina shook her head. “She’s going to have you wrapped around her finger one day.”
“Her mother already has me like that,” he smiled as he fired up the stove.
“I’d like to have you wrapped around me another way,” she bit her lip.
His sharp inhale of breath could be heard clearly. “Believe me, after Dr. Jones gives the okay I’m locking both of us upstairs and sending Anastasia with Nikki and Sergei for a few days.”
“Just a few days?” she teased. “I was thinking much longer. A few days would not even be a fourth of what I require for my fill of you.”
He walked around the kitchen island and took her face in his hands, massaging his tongue against hers. With one hand she reached for his belt and tugged.
“No,” he pulled away, breathing heavily.
Audrina placed a sleeping Anastasia in the bassinet next to her and walked over to Nikolai who was trying hard to concentrate on dicing tomato’s. She got on her knees and turned his body towards her.
“Audrina,” he warned through gritted teeth.
She peeked up at him from her lashes and bit her lip. “The doctor said I can’t have sex. But she said nothing about giving my soon to be husband a blow job.”
He watched her as she unzipped his pants and gripped him firmly. She licked her lips when he moaned and placed him in her mouth, savoring the delicious taste of him once again.
“What are you thinking about Mrs. Stratauv?” he asked, knocking her from her thoughts with a stroke of his finger on her cheek.
She turned her head to hide her blush. The way he called her by her married name filled her with excitement. “Just what a wonderful husband and father you are.”
He narrowed his eyes at her and gave a knowing smirk her way. “There’s only one thing that makes you blush that way and I know very well what it is.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I think you do,” he said and reached over the car seat and placed a hand on her belly. “That is why we have another one of these on the way.”
Audrina smiled and placed her hand over his. She was pregnant again. Come to find out, she had gotten pregnant with Anastasia the first time she and Nikolai ever had sex back when they went to her apartment. The due date aligned perfectly with the time and it surprised them both that it happened so quickly. This time was no different.
As soon as Dr. Jones gave the okay, it was music to Audrina’ ears. Eight weeks without sex had her going mad especially with a man like Nikolai around. When he kissed her she craved him inside of her and when his naked skin touched her while they slept she had to stop herself from jumping on top of him and riding him before she healed.
To surprise him, she asked Nikki to stay the night at the main house while she high tailed it to his penthouse and texted him to meet her there after he finished his work. As soon as he stepped in around eight in the night she surprised him with his very own burlesque show, opting to wear the outfit she wore when he first visited her show. She was surprised she fit into it after eight weeks since she still carried a bit of baby weight but Nikolai did not notice. He was enthralled as she danced and teased him like she once did onstage.