“Okay.” I nodded.
Adam held the back of my neck and gently wiped the alcohol along the edge of my lips. It burned, but not nearly as bad as what I was already enduring—and after he was done, the burning didn’t immediately come back like it had before, but there was a lingering ache. Adam pulled off more toilet paper, led me to the kitchen, and poured some milk in a bowl. He used it to wipe away the rubbing alcohol, and it started to soothe some of the burning. After a couple of minutes, it was completely gone, but my lips felt puffy. I touched them a couple of times and could tell they were definitely swollen.
“Thank you.” I looked up at him. “They are a couple of evil little bitches.”
“I hope you told your foster parents what they did…” He narrowed his eyes.
“Yeah.” I nodded. “They’re grounded.”
“Grounded? That’s pretty light…” He shook his head back and forth. “Where I’m from, they’d get some leather marks on their ass.”
“That’s not really acceptable here.” I chuckled under my breath. “Not anymore, at least. Maybe New York hasn’t caught up to the times yet.”
“I’m not from New York…” His voice trailed off, and he walked into the living room.
“Oh? I just assumed—you said your grandparents live there.” I followed behind him.
“On my mother’s side.” He nodded. “I grew up around my father’s side of the family—somewhere far away from America.”
“Your accent doesn’t sound foreign…” I raised an eyebrow.
“I studied many different languages in my younger years. They kind of blend together, which is what most people call an American accent—this country is a melting pot of dialects as well as people.” He sat down on the couch.
“You’re not going to tell me where you’re from, are you?” I sat down on the couch and turned towards him.
“It’s not important. I’m here now—with you. That’s all that matters.” He smiled and nodded.
I guess I haven’t earned all of his trust quite yet…
“Well now that I’m here, I believe you promised me a movie.” I forced a smile, even though my lips felt weird.
“Yes, that I did.” He chuckled and reached for the remote.
We decided to watch the newest remake of The Time Machine, which was interesting after seeing the original the previous night. It had been a few years since I saw the second one, so I didn’t notice how much was basically changed entirely. They did pull in some details that didn’t make it into the original movie, but they also added stuff that wasn’t even in the novel. I could tell that seeing the newer version bothered Adam. One major difference between the movies was that the main character tried to save a loved one by revisiting the past, but he was denied every time because someone’s fate couldn’t be changed. It was a theme in the original movie and surmised in the book, but the romantic elements didn’t exist. By the time the movie was over, Adam just kind of stared ahead with a blank look on his face.
“Was that not a good movie choice?” I moved closer to him.
“It’s fine,” he sighed. “Obviously you can’t change the past or what fate has in store for someone—that was the part of the book that I connected with. No matter what happens, the world always burns…”
“You lost someone didn’t you?” I tilted my head to the side. “Someone you loved…”
“Yes.” He nodded. “My wife.”
“Oh my god!” My eyes opened wide. “I’m so sorry! This was a terrible option for a movie!”
“It really wasn’t. The book helped at one time. I would have still liked it if it hit closer to home.” He turned towards me. “My wife—meant everything to me, but it’s been ten years.”
“Losing her…” I immediately made the connection. “That’s why you’re here—why you turned your back on the world.”
“It is.” He nodded. “Now you know my secret…”
“That’s heartbreaking, but it’s beautiful.” I felt tears welling up in the corner of my eyes. “That kind of love and devotion…”
“Some would call it foolish I suppose, but people find different ways to cope with loss. This became mine…” He nodded.
“Then I stomped all over your world,” I sighed.
“I think you came along at the right time, or maybe I was finally starting to heal. I felt a connection, and it gets stronger every time I see you.” He reached over and took my hand. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to compete with a memory—that will never be the case, regardless of what happens between us.”
“I would never try.” I shook my head back and forth. “Obviously you loved her very much.”
“Yes.” He nodded. “But it is time to move on. I can’t live in the past forever—I see that the future actually could offer me another chance at happiness, and I want to take the chance.”
“I do too.” I forced a smile, which was a little easier after some of the swelling went down, but it wasn’t completely normal.
I slid over into Adam’s arms and laid my head on his chest. I couldn’t imagine what he had gone through—to love someone with that much ferocity and then have them taken away. I assumed, based on the look in his eyes, that she had passed away. It didn’t look like the kind of sadness someone would hold onto because they had their heart broken by something other than a permanent end to what they shared. If he had that much love inside him and it broke him, then he was definitely worth saving. The ghost of his wife had a grip on him, but there was still a man beneath the beast, and that man didn’t need to be lost forever. He was too kind and generous to hide from the world—his heart needed to beat, and if there was a chance that I could earn even a piece of that heart, then it would be worth the fight.
“How are your lips feeling?” He looked down at me.
“They’re okay.” I smiled. “They feel good enough to be kissed…”
I begged for it—and I got it. Oh my god did I get it. I might have wanted the man beneath the beast, but I loved the way the beast kissed—there was so much ferocity and fire—it burned hotter than the ghost pepper in all the right ways. His kiss made my body warm, my head spin, and sent a tingle through my body that teased urges I had never explored with a man. I moved closer to him—put my hand on his hair and slid it down to his beard. It was tangled and unkempt, but it was clean. I don’t know if I would have cared either way. There was a wildness to him, an animal caged that needed to be released, and a man that held onto enough of his sanity to find his way to me in the darkness. When he finally pulled away from my lips, I had to remember how to breathe, but I would have gladly passed out in his arms to feel his lips crushing mine.
“Will I ever get to see the man underneath this?” I moved my hand along his chin and down the length of his beard.
“Are you sure you really want to?” He looked down. “I don’t even remember his face anymore—this might be an improvement.”
“When you’re ready…” I smiled. “But not until you are.”
I didn’t think there was any hint of ugliness underneath the grotesque visage he allowed to grow into a beast. Truthfully, it wasn’t even that grotesque, because I could see the soul lingering behind his eyes—his gentleness and kindness pierced the veil. We shared a few more fiery, ferocious kisses, and then we stayed intertwined in our embrace for some time. When it started to get dark, we ate and then returned to the couch. I suggested another movie—something that was a lot lighter than the one we watched. I stayed in his arms the entire time, cherishing the moment we shared. I wouldn’t have traded a minute of it for the world, but eventually it got late, and I knew I needed to go home or else my foster parents would complain about my late arrival.
“This is the part where you ask me to come back tomorrow—if you want…” I looked up at him and smiled.
“You no longer need an invitation to walk through my door.” He wrapped his arms around me.
“Then I’ll see you tomorrow.” I leaned against his
shoulder.
I stayed in his embrace for a few more minutes and then walked outside to my car. I felt a sense of separation the moment I was sitting behind the wheel and looking towards the house. I didn’t want to be with my foster parents or my two evil foster sisters; I just wanted to be behind those walls with the man I was falling for. I wouldn’t be gone long. I just had to go home and sleep away the hours that we would spend apart. I hoped those hours would be free of shenanigans from my evil foster sisters—maybe Adam was right, and they needed some leather on their asses to straighten them out. Then again—I wasn’t much better in the grand scheme of things. They were just playing pranks. I resulted to criminal behavior to get what I wanted. It worked out in the end, but only because I was lucky.
I would have gotten a lot worse than leather—in my world and probably in his.
Ten
Adam
My beauty was gone, and I felt an ache in my heart when she drove away. I didn’t hide the secret about my wife from her when she asked. I wondered how I would react if the moment came—I was afraid I would lie just to avoid telling her the truth. I felt like the bond growing between us was strong enough to endure finding out that my heart once belonged to someone else. I no longer felt that pull towards the one that had been laid to rest. The future called out to me in a voice so loud that it silenced the past. I didn’t have to betray a memory to walk into the future, because it was mine to grasp while I cherished what I lost. The pocket watch was in the case where it belonged. The beast was a shell that I no longer needed. It was time to shed it.
She wants to see the man that is underneath this monster—I’ll show her his face.
I normally had my groceries delivered early on Sunday morning. Jon often called the night before to see if there was anything else that I needed, so when the phone rang, I knew it was him. I added a few more items to the list, and he asked questions about the girl that had walked into my life. He cautioned me—a warning that was well placed because he knew the risk that would never go away—one secret that would haunt me regardless of how much I tried to let go of the past. I could show my face to Anabelle, but she was the only one that could see it—the world could not. Maybe I would tell her why if she asked, or maybe the truth in that confession would be strong enough to summon a lie. I just wasn’t sure…
“I’ll be careful. You’re a good friend…” I sighed and put down the phone.
I walked to the mirror and stared at the face I had worn for almost ten years. There was a man underneath it. I could almost see him when I closed my eyes, but it wasn’t the one I would see when the shell of the beast was shed. I was older—ten years was a long time. The boy that wore a prince’s crown—the man that didn’t take the one that was offered when he was supposed to be king—they were gone. Thirty-two wasn’t supposed to be old, but I felt ancient. Every year that passed had taken a toll. People called me the pretty prince when I was a boy. I hated that name. I did everything I could to outgrow it, but all of that was for nothing—their words meant nothing the moment I realized I didn’t want my crown.
I may be hideous under this shell—I’ll find out tomorrow. If Anabelle can kiss a beast, hopefully she can kiss the man underneath.
* * *
The next day
“You’re smiling.” I opened my door when Anabelle approached. “No more run-ins with your awful siblings?”
“Foster sibling and no—they were tame today.” She shrugged. “They’re probably plotting something even worse than ghost pepper juice in my lip gloss.”
“Hopefully not.” I chuckled and pulled her into my arms. “I missed you…”
“I missed you too.” She sighed as she stepped into my embrace.
We stayed locked in that tender moment. I didn’t let go of her immediately because I was starting to get nervous, but my choice had already been made. The beast was going to become a memory and fade away. I hoped I wouldn’t regret it. I bought more time with a kiss, although I definitely wanted to taste her lips again. There were no ill-effects from the prank that her awful siblings played on her—those lips were soft and gentle just like they were the first time I kissed her. I finally pulled away and led her to the kitchen. Each step felt heavier than the one before it, but I kept putting one foot in front of the other.
“I had my groceries delivered today—and I added popcorn to the list.” I looked back at her and smiled.
“Very nice.” She grinned. “Maybe we can have some with our movie?”
“Of course.” I nodded. “But there’s something we need to take care of first…”
“Oh?” She looked up at me.
“Yes.” I stepped to the side and showed her the scissors, razors, shaving cream, and clippers that arrived with my groceries. “If you’ll help…”
“You’re sure?” She walked up to the table and looked at them.
“I’m ready.” I pulled a chair out. “But I don’t think I can do it alone…”
“I should warn you—I’m no beautician.” She picked up the scissors and held them in her hand.
“That’s fine.” I sat down. “You can shave it all off you want—it’ll grow back.”
“I don’t know.” She narrowed her eyes and ran her fingers along the length of my hair. “I think a little hair would be nice.”
“I’m your canvas.” I sighed.
“I might leave a little bit of this too—or at least some stubble.” She touched my beard and nodded.
She wrapped her fingers around a chunk of my hair and pulled it into the scissors. The chunk hit the floor, and there was no turning back. She took care of my hair first, and when she trimmed off enough of the length, it started to curl—I forgot that it used to do that when there wasn’t much weight on it. She trimmed it until the only thing left was enough to hang past my ears. It was long enough to hang in front of my eyes, but too short to pull behind my ears. The scissors started to move through my beard, and a few matted chunks fell in my lap. I gave up trying to comb those out long ago. I still bathed regularly, but style wasn’t important. Once most of the beard was gone, she picked up the clippers and did some trimming—then she followed that with a little shaving cream and a razor.
“Hmm.” She took a step back.
“Horrible?” I looked up at her.
“No, there’s just so much hair. It would probably be easier to wash it off.” She twisted her lip into a perplexed look. “The sink maybe?”
“That’s fine.” I nodded and put my hand to my face—the worst of it was gone, but there were clumps of hair hanging to what remained.
I walked over to the sink and leaned forward. She warmed it up, and then used the spray faucet to wash away the debris left behind from shedding the beast. It felt strange to be free of that. I used my hands to wipe away what was left, and then reached for one of the kitchen towels. It would have never been big enough to dry the mane I wore for so long, but my trimmed one didn’t hold much water. I rubbed it across my face, and then let the towel fall away. She was finally able to see the man underneath—and I wasn’t sure what he looked like. I didn’t even have a mirror around to get a glimpse.
“Wow…” She blinked and nodded.
If she says I’m pretty, I might actually go crazy.
“Bad wow?” I raised an eyebrow.
“No.” She shook her head back and forth. “Definitely a good wow. You are—quite attractive.”
“You’re not so bad yourself.” I smirked and chuckled.
“You totally have the Daddy look going on…” Her lips spread into a grin. “It’s a good thing none of my foster fathers looked like you—I might have given them a good reason to throw me out.”
“Now you’re just being silly…” I shook my head back and forth. “I’m going to go look in the mirror.”
I walked into the bathroom and stared at the face I hadn’t seen in almost ten years. It wasn’t as hideous as I expected it to be. The boy had definitely aged, and the man had too. I had a few gray
strands in the beard beneath my bottom lip, but none in my hair. My face resembled my father’s when he was my age—from the pictures I remembered. I wasn’t sure about the whole Daddy thing, but it was certainly more distinguished and bold than the face I wore when I was a younger man—and I didn’t think anyone would dare call me pretty. I wiped off a few stray strands, and Anabelle walked into the bathroom beside me.
“Your shirt is soaked—I’m sorry.” She ran her fingers along the back. “Want me to grab you another one?”
“I—think I’ll be fine.” I tilted to the side and looked in the mirror.
“There’s no reason to wear one that’s wet.” She gave my shirt a tug—and it slid down a little on the back of my neck.
“No!” I pulled my shirt away from her grasp and shook my head, but I could already tell it was too late—she saw them.
“Are those—scars?” She blinked a couple of times in confusion.
“Yes.” I looked down and sighed.
“What happened?” She put her hand on my shirt, and her fingers traced along the edge of a scar.
“My wife died in an accident.” I exhaled sharply. “There was a fire—I tried to save her, but it was too late.”
“Oh god…” She leaned her head against my back.
“The hair and beard aren’t the only things that made me a beast.” I closed my eyes. “But the scars on my back can’t be trimmed.”
“It doesn’t matter.” She moved her hand down to the bottom of my shirt. “I wouldn’t have cared if you had scars on your face—your heart is more important than your appearance.”
“It’s trying to beat…” I sighed.
“Let’s get you a clean shirt. You don’t have to hide your scars from me.” She moved her hand to mine and squeezed it.
“Okay.” I nodded and let her lead me towards the stairs.
She was going to be the first person to ever see the scars except for the people at the hospital who treated my burns. They said a plastic surgeon might be able to fix them, but I didn’t care enough to try. I didn’t even take care of them while they healed. The moment I was able to leave the hospital, I retreated to my family home and disappeared into the darkness. It wasn’t the palace I grew up in, but it was mostly forgotten, and there was no way anyone would think that I was there—especially after Jon arranged to purchase it through a shell company that he set up for me. I liked it when the wounds hurt. It was a physical reminder of the pain in my heart. Once they healed to the point that the pain faded, the numbness was all that lingered in my soul.
Beast Daddy: Once Upon A Daddy Page 7