by Lauren Smith
She stepped into the lodge and was definitely pleased with what she saw. There was heat, which was crucial given that it was winter. They were lucky they didn’t have any snow on the ground yet. Plus, there was electricity and indoor plumbing—all the hallmarks of civilization and what she needed to function. The bedrooms were all cozy and cute. She chose the master bedroom, which had a queen-size bed. If Dimitri kept his promise, they would be sleeping nice and snug together in that bed. She stared at it, imagining being held close in his arms.
“Well, kiska, what do you think?” Dimitri’s Russian accent was back.
“So we’re the Smiths?”
He nodded. “For today.”
“You do realize that Mr. & Mrs. Smith was a movie about a couple of spies on opposites sides who married each other? You’re not exactly disproving my theory that you’re some kind of spy.”
Dimitri grinned and pulled her body back against his. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the shell of her ear.
“Be a good kiska and I will show you what I am tonight.”
The way he spoke, teasing her to be a good kitten, sent shivers of desire through her so strong that she almost gasped. Being with him had made it so easy to find the old Elena, the one who had craved passion and romance. The one who’d wanted to find a Dom of her very own someday. She had spent two months believing that Elena was dead, but she wasn’t. It was as though part of her had been trapped in a deep slumber, like Snow White frozen beneath a glass coffin. Now, after Dimitri’s kiss, she was coming back to life. She closed her eyes and embraced the heady sensation of his mouth as it explored her neck.
“How does one become a good kiska?” she asked between sighs.
“A good kiska will eat dinner with me and then sit beneath the stars . . . After that, she will tell me one fantasy she’s had about sex.”
“Just one?” She was somewhat disappointed at the thought of only sharing one fantasy with him.
“For tonight.” He nibbled her earlobe and she moaned, helpless to stop the wetness growing between her thighs.
For the first time in what felt like forever, her fantasies seemed like just that, a beautiful fantasy and not a distorted nightmare that would leave her screaming herself hoarse.
“Now, if you want to shower, go ahead. I will prepare dinner.”
“What are we having?”
He trailed a fingertip down the length of her nose. “It’s a surprise.”
Her heart swelled with a flood of warmth that was too wonderful to name.
He left her alone and headed toward the kitchen. Elena sank onto the bed and took a few deep breaths. Ever since the attack in Malibu, she had been coiled tight like a spring, almost crushed to the point where she might snap rather than spring back. But now they were far away from that house and the dead body. They were in a state park, with their path almost untraceable—at least she hoped it was. Dimitri seemed to have relaxed as well, and that made her feel even more safe. They had escaped. They were on the run, yes, but it was okay, at least for now, and now was all she could focus on.
After she freshened up in the shower and changed into some warm clothes, she followed the delicious smells to the kitchen. Dimitri was removing something from the oven, and she had a moment to admire his backside in the jeans he wore. He had donned a fisherman’s sweater and now looked like he belonged in Maine. The thought of him looking so like he belonged where she’d grown up made something stir inside her.
A deep longing for a quiet life by the sea washed over her, with endless sunsets on a rocking sailboat, or snowy winters and warm fires. It was a life she’d never truly considered before. She’d been so focused on exploring the world, but in just a few months, all of that had changed. She’d changed. Elena wanted what her parents had. She wanted a future with Dimitri. That realization stunned her. It took her a moment to gather her thoughts, and she swallowed past the sudden lump in her throat.
“What’s for dinner?” She used her most casual voice as she sat on a stool facing the bar that overlooked the kitchen.
He shot her a sexy look that flared with such intensity that she felt like she was standing in front of an open oven.
“Lasagna. One of my specialties.”
“A Russian who likes Italian food?”
“You like pizza. That’s Italian.” He winked at her, and she laughed.
“You got me there.” She loved the way the loose sweater hung off his muscled form. She fantasized slowly pulling that soft sweater off his body, making love to him, and then wearing it and nothing else . . .
Elena jerked her thoughts back. Damn, the man was dangerous.
“Wait, how did you make lasagna? There’s not exactly a grocery store nearby.”
“I purchased groceries this morning right before I snuck into the Bellagio and got you a cinnamon roll. I stored them in the large cooler in the back of the Range Rover.”
“Oh . . .” She had totally missed the cooler. Well, she had seen it, but she hadn’t given it any thought.
“You are still too skinny. Meat and carbs are what you need.” He set the pan on the kitchen island to let it cool, then turned back to the oven and pulled out a bit of wrapped foil.
“Garlic bread?” she asked. The smell made her mouth water.
He grinned and gave her a wink.
“You are some sort of evil genius. Garlic bread is one of my weaknesses.”
“I know,” he chuckled.
She froze. “What do you mean, you know?”
Dimitri removed the oven mitts and retrieved his briefcase from the kitchen table. He pulled out his tablet, logged on, and then opened something up on the screen and handed it to her.
“We have traveled too far together for this to be a secret.” He let her turn the tablet around so she could see what was on the screen.
She stared at the dozens of photos of herself at various ages. Everything about her life was there—down to her favorite foods and even her grade school report cards. “This . . . this is my life . . .”
“This is only a piece of you,” Dimitri said, as if it absolved him.
She could barely breathe. It felt like a betrayal. “Why do you have this?”
“When I learned of your escape from Vadym, I told Leo to work up a dossier on you. That was when I knew I wanted to take care of you. I wanted to know everything about you so that I can give you what you need.”
It took a long moment for her to process that. He’d been keeping a file of everything about her? Was she okay with this?
“These are only simple facts, kiska. They don’t tell me who you really are.”
“They don’t?”
He smiled, but it was a sorrowful expression. “Childhood report cards don’t tell me anything. I would rather have you tell me what subjects you loved, who your favorite teacher was—the things that matter.” He nodded at the tablet. “The things that define you aren’t in there.”
The old Elena would not have listened to this, but the person she was now had aged a century in the last two months. She could see his side as to why he’d wanted this information and how it wasn’t enough to truly know someone. It was so clear that he was from a vastly different world than she was, where invasions of privacy were seemingly commonplace. She was going to have to get used to that.
“Would you give me one of these dossiers about you?” she asked after a moment.
That mischievous twinkle was back in his blue eyes. “You would like one?”
“Seems only fair. Text that Leo guy and have him make one of you for me.”
“Consider it done. Now, sit and we’ll eat.” He gestured to the table, and she waited for him to bring her a plate. She realized that despite him being a Dom in the bedroom, he loved to serve and care for her. She certainly didn’t mind if a man opened the door for her or brought her food. It was Dimitri’s way of showing respect and affection. That only made him infinitely more irresistible.
She thought back to the dossier, and w
hat he knew about her, while they ate the perfectly cooked lasagna.
“What is your favorite color?” she asked. “And your favorite foods?”
“Orange, the color of a burning flame. And my favorite food is beef stroganoff.”
The mention of the flame reminded her about his ring.
“And the bird on your ring? It looks like a phoenix. Is it?” she asked.
He leaned back in his chair, his hand raised above the table as he stared at the gold signet ring on his finger. He removed it and leaned forward, handing it to her. It was heavier than she expected as it landed in her palm, and she closed her fingers around it protectively. The gold was warm to the touch, and when she opened her hand again, the phoenix emblem seemed almost alive. A hint of letters carved on the inside of the band caught her attention.
“What does it say?” She angled the ring to better read the words. It wasn’t written in Cyrillic, but she didn’t recognize the language, either.
“Luceo non uro. It’s Latin for ‘I shine, not burn.’”
“What does that mean?”
“It means that I do not let the fires of tribulation burn all-consuming—I shine through. And if I must burn, I become reborn into the flames.”
The hair on the back of her neck rose, and Elena shivered as she handed it back to him. “So it is a phoenix. Is that a family motto?”
“In a way,” he replied.
“One of those things you can’t tell me?”
“I’m sorry, kiska.” He pointed at her plate. “Finish, so we can go stargazing.”
“Stargazing?”
He smiled. “It’s part of why I chose this place. It is a remote location, but this state park is also designated an International Dark Sky Park. The high plateau and the distance from city light pollution makes it an ideal place to view the celestial sphere.”
Elena had never stargazed before, but it sounded fun.
“Dress warmly. Meet me at the front door in a few minutes.” Dimitri collected their plates and headed back to the kitchen.
She retrieved a dark-blue peacoat, mittens, and a white knit cap, then met Dimitri at the door. He carried a thick picnic blanket under one arm and two pillows under the other. He was dressed in a long black wool coat.
“Let me get the door for you.” She opened the door, and they walked outside. She closed the door behind them, and they were swallowed up in darkness. The lights from the lodge were completely hidden by blackout curtains.
As her eyes adjusted, she saw Dimitri stride ahead of her toward a distant spot on the ground. She followed him as he unfurled the picnic blanket and laid it down. He eased onto the blanket, and she did the same. They were close, almost touching. The night air was clear and a little cold around them. Elena wanted to curl into him and absorb his warmth. After a moment he stretched out flat on his back, cushioning his head with a pillow.
She joined him. It was just the two of them now, a night sky horizon all around them and quiet stars above. It was like they were the only two people left in the universe, and the thought sent a strange wave of peace through her.
“Tell me what you see,” Dimitri said as he pointed up at the night sky.
Thousands—no, hundreds of thousands, perhaps millions of stars covered the sky so perfectly that all she could see were celestial objects. Straight above them was a thick band of gold-and-purple clouds that seemed to glow.
“Is that the Milky Way?” she gasped. It was so clear, so visible. She had only ever seen pictures of it that looked like this in books. There was always too much light pollution where she lived. Only a fraction of these stars would have been visible, and certainly not the Milky Way. Yet here it was, far more vast, infinite, and wondrous than she could have imagined.
“They say not all wonders are endless, but I believe this one is.” Dimitri’s voice was so gentle that her heart quivered.
He was right—the beauty above was infinite. Her eyes burned with tears as she took in the enormity of that thought . . . a beauty that was never-ending. Stars died and new ones were born, but there would always be celestial objects glowing in the night sky visible from somewhere in the universe.
Her mother had said once that thinking about the stars and the universe made her feel small, that she didn’t like to think about it. But for Elena, it was different. Especially tonight.
The endless beauty of the heavens made her feel like she was a part of something greater, something more powerful than anything here on earth. What Vadym had done to her, what he’d made her feel . . . none of that mattered, not when she looked up at that sky. He was a tiny, inconsequential thing. She wasn’t. She was a part of the stars, a part of the mysterious beauty above her. After all, she was made of stardust, just like everything else in the universe.
She let out a sigh. So much of her fear and anger from the last few months bled away into the night. “It is endless . . .”
“Endless and precious beyond imagining,” he agreed.
She turned to him and saw his gaze was on her, not the heavens. She stared back at him, aware of what he was really saying to her. She wanted more than anything to tell him that he had given her a gift. He’d helped her to see her value in the world, to feel like she belonged and that she was in charge of her fate again. Not only that, but she felt wanted and desired by a man she wanted and desired back. It left her almost dizzy with optimism.
“Dimitri . . . ,” she whispered and reached out to touch him. He rolled onto his side to face her, and she slid closer to him, tugging herself into his arms.
“You shine, not burn, Elena. Never forget that.”
The funny thing was, she believed him. For the first time since Vadym had taken her, she felt the power of her life was back in her hands. Even though they were on the run, she felt hope for the first time in what felt like forever.
She lifted her head a little so that it rested on his pillow beside him, then touched his full lips with her fingertips and briefly lost herself in dreams of kissing him.
“You saved me,” she said as she traced a finger over his mouth and then caressed his jaw.
“You saved yourself, kiska.” As he spoke, his voice was slightly rough with emotion.
“I didn’t.”
“You did. You stayed alive, lasted longer than any other woman in your situation and had the strength to get free, to fight.”
“It doesn’t feel like I did anything.”
He placed a hand on her hip, the gentle but firm grip grounding her. “Every day you draw breath is a day you have saved yourself, a day you have won by living your life.”
She sighed and closed her eyes before she kissed him. Was it possible for a man to taste like darkness and light all at once? Because Dimitri did. He tasted like everything she’d always dreamed of in her perfect fantasies. But he wasn’t a fantasy. He was real.
She rolled onto her back as he came on top of her. They continued to kiss while he captured her hands and pinned them on either side of her head. The weight of him on top of her felt so good. She had forgotten this feeling, the feeling of safety beneath a man. The only thing he would do was devastate her senses with pleasure. He owned every part of her, yet she felt strangely free at the same time. Elena trusted him with her body, and now her heart and soul were his too.
He slowed his sensual, playful kisses and looked down at her. “You’re thinking too much again, kiska.” He used that teasing Dom tone that sounded disapproving but really wasn’t.
“I wasn’t thinking,” she argued with a smile. “I was feeling.” She lifted her head up to his and bit his bottom lip. He groaned and lowered his face back down, ruthlessly claiming her mouth. She adored the way he kissed. One minute it was all sweetness and gentle courtship, and the next he was nearly savage in the way he seemed desperate to devour her. She wanted all of it, all of him.
She gasped for breath as he moved his mouth to her throat. “Dimitri.”
“Yes?”
“I want it all with you.”
She hoped he understood. She was ready to try going all the way this time.
“Not yet. We don’t need to. We have all the time we need.” He kissed her throat again, pressing his teeth against her flesh in a way that sent pangs of lust through her.
She moaned. “Please, I need this. I’m ready. Be my Dom, not a gentleman.”
He raised his head and looked down at her. “If I sense for one moment you aren’t ready, we will stop. Understood?”
Her heart swelled. “You really are a gentleman, aren’t you?”
“Only with you, kiska. Only with you.” But as he said it, she knew that wasn’t true. He was a gentleman in every sense of the word. Then he stole her lips in a kiss that seemed to send every star above them into a heavenly blaze of brilliant light.
Elena parted her thighs, wanting him to take her right there beneath the stars.
He growled, the sound encouraging rather than reprimanding. “Kiska.”
Dimitri suddenly stiffened, his head jerking up. The soft, indulgent expression on his face vanished, and the man who had a thousand secrets was back. She heard the hum of a car engine, and the beams of headlights cut through their perfect night.
“Get up. Run. Head for the riverbank. Do not stop until you reach that bank. Stay down, no matter what you hear, and take this.” He was already off her body and had pressed a small handgun into her palms.
“Dimitri . . .”
“There’s no time.” He dragged her to him for one last kiss that stole the breath from her before she was pulled to her feet and shoved in the direction of the riverbank.
When she reached it, she slid off the steep ridge and down about six feet into a hollowed-out bank that hid her from view. Then she held her breath. Her blood roared in her ears as she waited for any sound, anything at all. But it was quiet and dark. She prayed that Dimitri would be okay. If anything happened to him . . . No, she wouldn’t think that. He would be okay—he had to be.