He was grinning at Curtis, “Congratulations for making a fool of yourself. I heard that your brother didn’t even bother paying to change the match. I guess he wanted some fun but I don’t blame him, it was starting to get dull around here,” he laughed at his own ridicule.
“Be careful with your words Stephen or I’ll….” Curtis angrily warned him. I could see that he was furious and almost lost his temper until Ambrose hurriedly stepped in between them.
“He’s not worth it Curtis,” Ambrose spoke trying to calm him down.
Stephen continued to laugh and was looking at my direction like a predator stalking its prey. He circled me and was examining from head to toe and I suddenly started feeling afraid by his intimidating presence. He became serious while staring directly at me face to face, “But I have to hand it you Curtis, you have a very beautiful specimen here. Who would have thought they have such beauty in the lower stations. Too bad you could have been mine if you were an Elite,” he insinuated with such inappropriate desire by the sound of his voice.
“Enough Stephen,” Ambrose commanded forcefully this time.
Stephen conceded unwillingly. The way he talked made me feel that I was not a person but a piece of property, someone to be used for the envy of others. He was the worse of them lot. He stood beside me and whispered something in my ear, “You see that Lord and the Lady not far from him?” he spoke in a hushed and disturbing way referring to the middle aged Lord who was talking loudly in front of us at a distance, and a tall Lady who was having a conversation with the other Ladies but looked bored.
“They’ve been married for more than thirty years,” he said while briefly glancing at Curtis, “yet they have never slept together in the same room since they got married, never ate at the same table except on social occasions, and never talked to each other when at home. If they do talk, it only ends up one insulting the other. Your life is going to end up like that, with no sense of direction or a future. What a waste would that be for someone as pretty as you,” he sounded contented with his threats.
Tears were starting to form and it was getting harder to breath but I told myself not to cry trying to keep the tears from falling. I stared back at Stephen hoping that he would see that his words didn’t affect me and at the same time trying to keep myself together not to break down in front of him.
“It was nice meeting you my Lord. I am sure you have far more better ways to spend your time than talking to a low birth like me who obviously does not deserve your presence. Good evening,” I politely spoke hoping that he didn’t notice my difficulty saying those words. I curtsied wishing he understood that I wanted him to leave. It was the first time I spoke to him that night and it made Stephen laughed then he slowly bowed, I was relieved he took the hint, and then he finally left us without saying another word. Curtis and Ambrose still wore their angry faces. Anguish overcame me and I suddenly felt exhausted that my strength started to faltered.
“I apologized for Stephen. His manner was inexcusable; I hope you won’t pay much attention to him,” Ambrose spoke and had a look of concern.
Curtis remained silent showing no signs of remorse. Does he loathe me as much as Stephen or the other Elites? But what could I expect from him? He was the same as the rest of them; they have no regard for stations beneath them, and even though I was Elite through marriage they would never see me as their equals. I realized that I would never be capable of loving Curtis and he was incapable of such affections as well. The night was late and the guest finally started to leave, and I saw Andrew walking towards us.
“Say your goodbyes now Lord Ambrose,” Andrew commanded looking bored.
Ambrose could not refuse the Duke so he nodded and briefly whispered something in Curtis’ ear then patted his shoulder before he solemnly took his leave. Andrew waited until he left then he tiredly smiled at us and said, “Well, it’s time to do your duty my brother. Sharing the bed with your mate is customary on the first night after the ceremony,” he spoke with a sheepish grin then added, “Seal the bond,” it sounded more like a command when he left us in our awkwardness.
I was terrified when we left the banquet hall. We made our way through the large hallway as I silently followed Curtis. Seal the bond, it was not required by law but was it expected with the Elites on their first night? The white hallway was elegant and the walls were designed with artistic carvings that only skillful hands could do, and the wall lamps were lit and they looked like dancing fires burning brightly along the hallway. The night was beautiful and peaceful but when you are with a stranger then this was not a night of sweet dreams, no passionate lovers, no affection or devotion; these simply did not exist in my own story. We stopped at a large door where a footman who was standing guard opened it. We entered in which I assumed was our bed chamber, then the door closed after. The room was dimly lit, and was ten times larger than my own bedroom back home. It had a large balcony with glass doors overlooking the gardens outside. The chamber had its own living room with a couch and a table, and a soft blue carpet laid on the marble floor. The windows were draped with sophisticated blue curtains, and the large bed with white sheets and pillows, and the blanket covered by blue linen was on the center against the wall with classic mounted lamps placed on each side of the bed. Curtis went inside a room within the chamber, and I went to explore the other room opposite to where he was, and when I entered, it was not as small as I thought it would be, it was brighter inside with white lights illuminating the entire ceiling and walls and even the floor. It was full of expensive female wardrobes that only a Lady Elite would wear, long fine dresses with wide skirts for daily use either long sleeved or without, some showed bare shoulder and the chest while some covered the neck, and banquet gowns with elegant and extravagant designs all hanged neatly and organized according to color. There were boots, shoes, heels and sandals also organized by color and type and displayed like they do on the shops. Hand bags of the most expensive kind where placed inside glass cases according to colors and types, and I was amazed when I saw a bag glittered with what I thought were real diamonds, and large clear mirrors were placed on each side of the walls. I wearily looked around and thought I only needed something comfortable to wear for sleeping. I found a white silk short nightgown, I never wore this kind of clothes when I sleep but it was all that was there. I covered myself with a white soft robe uncomfortable that I had to wear something revealing.
Then I heard a soft knock outside the main door.
“Yes?” I overheard Curtis say and it seemed that he was already in the bedroom.
Then the door slowly creaked and I heard a woman spoke kindly, “Pardon me my Lord for intruding but I was wondering if the Lady needed any assistance?”
“You may come in Miss Pattilyn,” Curtis gave permission.
Then I heard footsteps approaching the room where I was and then she appeared with a pleasant smile.
“My Lady,” she curtsied, “May I congratulate you on your marriage. I am here to convey my assistance my Lady, if you need any,” she offered pleasantly.
I couldn’t help but smile back, “Thank you but none at the moment.”
“Well then… Oh!” she saw my gown lying on the floor, “I can take that for you my Lady.” She picks up the gown and slings it over her arm.
“Can I keep it?” I quickly pleaded, “My mom bought it for me.” It was the only thing I had from back home I thought.
“Certainly my Lady, let me just have someone wash it for you and I’ll return it when it is done.”
“Thank you,” I spoke feeling grateful.
“Is there anything else my Lady?”
“No, that would be all.” But in the back of my mind I was thinking if she could take me far away from here.
“I’ll take my leave then, good night my Lady,” she curtsied then I followed her to the bedroom.
“Good night my Lord,” she curtsied and then left us.
We were alone again. Curtis was on the couch and I was on my side of th
e chamber. For once, he looked at me but I couldn’t make out what he was thinking in the dim room and it made me so uneasy that I quickly tightly closed the robe I was wearing. There was no sound except for my heavy breathing. Was this really happening? I prayed that it wouldn’t, not with him. It took all of my strength whatever was left to stop myself from trembling. He was my mate and a Lord so he can do whatever he wanted should he decide to take me tonight. He overpowered me, and what I wanted had nothing to do here and it didn’t matter. He suddenly moved then stood up which startled me. I thought he was coming towards where I was but he went to the bed instead, and took a pillow, and for the first time that night he spoke to me with a somber manner, “You can take the bed,” and he went back to the couch and placed the pillow then lay down. I was so relieved and it felt like something heavy was lifted from me. I was grateful that he decided not to do anything tonight. I went to the bed and settled under the comfortable blanket while still wearing my robe. I turned off the lamps with the switch on my side of the bed. I was still awake thinking of what had just happened. I miss mom and dad, I miss our home, and I even miss the man from across the street. I wondered what he was doing, was he thinking of me? Then I didn’t realize that I was crying, I was holding back tears the entire night that it all finally came streaming down my face. I was tired of being strong that it was time to let the tears go, and I didn’t even care if Curtis heard. There was clearly no connection between us, not like what mom and dad had. He despises me as much as I do him. Although this was a foolish thought, but I blamed him for everything because if it wasn’t for him, if only he didn’t existed then I wouldn’t be here in this miserable place away from home. Suddenly I felt exhausted; the day had worn me out. I finally closed my eyes. My only desire was to sleep and dream of nothing but home and those dreams would be the closest thing I had left of the place.
CHAPTER 5: Lost Souls
CURTIS
I knew my matched with a Beta was the worst thing that could happen to me; being the topic of gossip, their fake smiles, and the whispers behind my back. I was disgraced when my own brother didn’t fix the match when he could. I was furious at Andrew, I still believed he did this on purpose just his way of making my life miserable for disappointing him or even father. I wanted revenge but it would be treason which was punishable by death so that was pointless.
It had been a month since the ceremony and nothing was getting any better. Even before the ceremony, things began to stir among the Elites and among the household staff that a Lord was matched with a Beta. The news was like a disease with the Elites that they thought it was contagious as they looked at me with revolting expression. They thought I wouldn’t notice but their inconspicuous behavior made it hard to miss. The arrival of Elaine was most anticipated and Andrew was having fun with the unconventional event. Everybody was curious who she was but I was probably the only one who was not. They saw her as some kind of bizarre new species that they can’t wait to be entertained. I must admit though, she was very alluring at the ceremony, like a rare creature, different in a captivating way but still she only reminded me of how Andrew was turning my life upside down. I was silently begging for her to not go through with the Pledge, sparing me from this doomed life. Ambrose as usual, always found kind words to say, such as, it could have been worst at least she was not bad looking, or, maybe you’ll learn to love her, but I was not paying much attention to him. I commend her for her strength though; she was definitely a strong woman. She was bold enough to face everybody at the banquet hall but I thought she was about to break down any moment. Then came Stephen, I knew his family was invited but he just couldn’t resist coming over and rubbing more insult to my face. I almost lost my temper back then, I could have made a spectacle if Ambrose didn’t intervene but I was more surprise at Elaine and how she handled herself. Stephen was cruel to her, yet she managed not to falter. Yes I admit she was strong but all strength had its limits. On our first night though, I couldn’t help being mesmerized by her beauty, her auburn hair shone when it rested on her white robe, and her emerald green eyes glimmered even in the dark. It was my first time alone with a woman, I was nervous at first then I suddenly felt lonely, after I realized that physical attraction was never enough when there was nothing in the heart. After that night, I decided to sleep on a separate chamber.
The next few days had not been easy. I spent most of my time avoiding Elaine and Andrew but I was glad she had her lessons which seemed to take most of her time so I didn’t see her often. I thought she needed the lessons desperately if she was to keep up at being an Elite. The only time we saw each other was when I decide to dine at the dining room, and sometimes Lady Katherine would join but it didn’t improve the mood. I spied on Elaine once when we were having our dinner, she seemed to have difficulty with which utensils to use that were laid on the table for her but she eventually improved over time, I guess the lessons were effective after all. Andrew had not joined us at the dining room ever since but he was not missed. I could also tell that the staff in the manor took a liking to Elaine, they seem always extra friendly with her. By then, everybody in Pinewood knew that a Beta was living as a Lady among the Elites, and I imagined the villagers talking about her when they gather at their own dinner tables, and I was certain some were enthusiastic of the news that someone from the lower station was elevated to the Elites. They may be celebrating but soon as time goes by, she would probably be forgotten, and then she would be just another pretentious Lady to them.
I was out on the grounds with Peter. Eager for the day to start, I wanted to get out of the manor because it had been a long time since I visited the villages once more and explored Pinewood. We made our way to the stables and I requested Mr. Witherson to ready the horses. While I waited, I observed that Protectors were arriving in groups all in their black and red uniforms. It was strange that they were here and Andrew never mentioned about them. We were about to leave on horseback through the main gate when two Protectors guarding the gate suddenly stopped us.
“Halt! No one is allowed to leave without authority from His Grace.”
We reined our horses to a stop.
“This is Lord Curtis of House Bermule, brother to His Grace, let us through,” Peter announced.
“My apologies my Lord but we have orders not to let anyone pass unless ordered by His Grace.”
“What’s going on here?” I demanded.
“I do not have clearance to answer that my Lord.”
I had a feeling that the only one who had explanation to all this was Andrew. I turned the horse around frustrated that this had to happen today.
In the dining room, Lady Katherine decided to join us for dinner. The sound of our utensils can be heard as the three of us ate in silence. I usually preoccupied myself with my thoughts to make this more bearable. I was chewing my food when I suddenly choked so I cleared my throat and drank my wine. Lady Katherine and Elaine stared silently at me probably startled by my sudden sound.
“My apologies,” I said, and then we continued eating as if nothing had happened.
Suddenly Andrew entered the dining room indiscreetly and decided to join us.
“I’m starving,” he declared, and he sat on his chair at head of the table and Mr. Thistle immediately served him his first course then Andrew gobbled it down without paying much attention to us. I was staring at him, and knew that this was my only chance to ask but I was reluctant because I was not sure what mood he was in but I took the opportunity anyway.
“I was wondering brother if you could tell us what the Protectors are doing in Pinewood,” I asked politely careful not to tread on his mood. The two Ladies glanced at me with uncertainty in their eyes.
“Them? It’s nothing to be concerned about,” he replied without looking up from his plate but I wasn’t satisfied with his answer so I pursued further.
“If it’s nothing to be concerned about then you could tell us why,” I reluctantly asked.
“For protection and I don
’t want to hear another word about it,” he commanded sounding annoyed.
There was more silence as he continued to eat.
“I have your leave then to visit the nearby villages,” I implied nervously.
“No, not this time,” he declined.
“When then?” I insisted.
Andrew banged his hand on the table loudly that it startled the Ladies. There it was, I crossed the line again.
“When I say when. Why do you want to go there anyway?” he angrily questioned but I just sat there unmoved by his sudden outburst that sometimes I think I was getting used to it.
“Because they need help, and I promised that I would,” I explained then I took a sip from my wine.
Andrew stopped eating then glared at me then I noticed Lady Katherine shifted nervously on her seat.
“You want to help?” he angrily asked, “Fine! Help all you want just as long as you get out of my way and stop annoying me. I’ll give you leave if you bring your mate of yours with you and make her useful for once. Her sulking is getting on my nerves as well; the two of you could sulk together outside the manor.”
That was not what I had in mind because I wanted to leave the manor to stay away from him and Elaine.
“The road is no place for a Lady brother,” I reminded him trying to get out of this.
Andrew had an evil grin and retorted, “Either she comes along or no one leaves. Anyway, she is no real Lady so I am sure she is used to the inconvenience. I’ll even put the two of you in charge of the farms if you like.”
Nobody said a word.
Andrew smirked, “That’s settled! So keep your mouth shut and don’t bother me again.”
Fine! I thought, if this was the only way for me to leave the manor then I would take it, and I just hoped Elaine won’t be a nuisance.
ELAINE
I couldn’t take another hour in that dining room. It was bad enough that I had to eat in silence but dining with Andrew was awful. Last night with him was the first and I feared would not be the last. I thought he was too proud to dine in my presence but I was wrong, he liked to lavish on the thought of torturing me. I preferred Lady Katherine’s company though even if we hadn’t exchange words since I arrived, but she gives warm smiles every time our path would cross. I thought at first she was like any other Elite Lady, vain and formal but she seemed nice. I was glad that Andrew didn’t paid much attention to me yesterday but from what I saw, Curtis and Andrew were not the best of bothers one would hope for belonging to one family. The way they looked at each other, they loathed the other. I didn’t know much about their family but it was not hard to decipher that they clearly had issues. Then Curtis brought up about going to the villages. I groaned deep inside when Andrew commanded that I should come along. It was not at the top of my list that I considered to be enjoyable. I wanted to refuse but I knew I couldn’t, and then I hoped that leaving the manor was going to be more pleasant than staying here and do more of those lessons. Learning how to be a Lady was boring. My instructor, an old strict woman clearly a Delta who probably served many Lords and Ladies, even the Emperor and the Empress as she claims. She taught me nothing meaningful or significant except on how to be superficial, or how to act when dining in a formal setting and what proper utensils to use which according to her, tells a lot about a Lady especially on how she holds them. It was infuriating that you were being judged by how you hold a certain fork or knife. She would tap my hand with her stick whenever I did something improper or when she catches me rolling my eyes. She continued to instruct me on how to present myself if I run into another Lord or Lady or even Royalty. She would make a displeased face when I do or say something wrong. I knew she was not fond of me, and she thought I didn’t deserve the promotion but I didn’t care. One thing also that I was having a hard time adjusting was when the staff would bow or curtsied me; I tried telling them that it was not necessary but I think it became their habit so I left them to it.
The Premortals (The Premortals Series Book 1) Page 10