by Di Jones
She nodded, her eyes serious and fathomless. He couldn’t tell what her answer would be so his heart beat in anticipation. “I won’t keep you waiting too long. There’s a lot to think about.”
His breath came out in a whoosh, and his heart rate plummeted. He was keenly disappointed, but didn’t want to show her how much. “Take as long as you need, so long as the answer is yes.” He grinned, took her hands, and squeezed them, hoping that somehow his touch would instill confidence in her.
She blushed and he signaled for the check. Then he helped her on with her coat, and they left for the Town Square, where the annual pre-concert festivities were underway.
Andy took a deep breath, taking in the smell of hot chocolate and cinnamon donuts. “If I hadn’t just eaten I’d definitely be having one of those donuts.”
“Let’s have one anyway. We didn’t have dessert.” When he nodded, Elizabeth made her way over to the stand and bought two.
“The Mayor’s already started his annual Christmas speech,” Andy said when Elizabeth returned, leading her to a vantage point near the rotunda where the Mayor was speaking. They listened to the remainder of it, eating the freshly made, soft, sugary treats. “His wife, Gladys, will turn on the lights for the big Christmas tree when he’s finished.” When she did there was clapping as the thirty-foot tree was lit with silver and gold lights.
“Come here, beautiful.” Andy pulled her to him and kissed her gently on the lips.
As they pulled apart, a young woman hurried past them, pulling her cherry red coat tight around her. “There’s Harmony,” Elizabeth said, waving to her. “She looks pretty stressed, doesn’t she?”
“Wouldn’t you be if you were organizing a concert like this? Especially with a major star in it like Emery Dante.”
“Yeah, I guess, but she shouldn’t be. This concert is going to be a huge success. And for sure, this town needs something to get excited about.”
“I do, too.” He grinned, pulled her in to his side, and kissed her deeply this time, ignoring everyone around them.
She pushed him away playfully but blushed with pleasure. “So no pressure for me, then?” She went back in for a hug.
“Maybe a little. But for tonight we’ll focus on enjoying the concert.”
“Okay, deal. No drama tonight. Just plain fun.”
They left the square and joined the line outside the Town Hall and then once inside they found their seats. Sitting close together, hand in hand, they chatted while waiting for it to start. The excitement in the air was infectious, and Andy couldn’t help but wish he had something tangible to celebrate. But although Elizabeth hadn’t yet agreed to join him on his travels, he was sure she would.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many single women in a Christmas concert featuring school kids,” Andy said, looking around the hall. “Having said that I’ve never been to a Christmas concert with kids…not since I was young, anyway.”
“Nothing like a rock star to get every woman in town out. Hopefully Emery doesn’t overshadow the children.” Elizabeth knew how excited the kids would be about their performances—it didn’t seem like so long ago she’d been performing in these events herself.
He kissed her on the cheek. “Thank you for coming with me. I’m so glad I get to do this with you.”
She turned to him, and they shared a quick kiss on the lips before she answered. “Me too. This is going to be the most unforgettable Christmas concert ever.”
Seventeen
Elizabeth
While she’d been thrilled that Andy had asked her to join him on his once-in-a-lifetime cross-country road trip, Elizabeth felt subtle pressure to say yes. It wasn’t because he’d pushed her—apart from his comment that he needed something to be excited about—it was more about his eager expression and his body language. The set of his shoulders hinted at his tension over her lack of a decision, despite his otherwise open posture. She acknowledged the experience would be an amazing opportunity for her, but honestly, when she thought about it in a clear headed and logical way, it was so foolish she almost felt embarrassed giving it serious consideration. Although the idea of leaving town with a charming and good looking man seemed an exciting idea, why would she tie herself to a guy who would tire of her before they made it a couple of hundred miles? He was used to an exciting life in the military and he was a free spirit, yet she was a little nobody from a small town who had a predictable and narrow life. Okay, so they’d worked together in the bookstore for a few weeks now and they might have had tons of fun and totally amazing sex, but they barely knew each other. And what did she really know about his life, beyond the fact he’d been in the army? She loved what they had—it was an exhilarating change from her dull existence, but it wasn’t reality at all.
In fact, as she’d sat at the dinner table giving it logical thought, the more reasons came to her that she shouldn’t do this. While she could do her transcription work from any location, how easy would it be to focus and put the time in when they were traveling? And what about her house? The idea of giving it up was terrifying. While it might be modest and not in the best part of town, her little home was her much-loved sanctuary. Lewiston itself was a cocoon. All her friends were here and if something went wrong with her relationship with Andy she’d be isolated until she could get back home.
Her gut swam with adrenaline, making her feel sick with apprehension, and yet when she thought about telling him that she wasn’t going, she froze up. Everything he did demonstrated how much he cared for her and wanted to make her happy. She could see the way he felt about her, so how could she disappoint him like this? It would ruin their evening and anyway, she wanted him to be happy.
Despite the festivities in the town square, she’d been distracted, but now she was relieved to be in their seats, waiting for the show to start.
As the lights dimmed and the first performer came on, she started to relax. During the first three acts, she became aware of people around her shifting in their seats.
She leaned over to Andy. “What’s happening? Everyone seems unsettled.”
“They’re probably waiting for Emery Dante to come on.”
“It’s more than that. I have this feeling that things are unraveling. Something’s going on.”
Trisha Bell and the Mayor were huddled together at the end of the aisle, just to the side of the stage, and their voices were rising in pitch. Harmony was at the side of the curtain wringing her hands, her mother Gladys by her side. A group of kids were running around below the stage with no one to corral them as Harmony’s attention wasn’t on them, unusual for a teacher who was usually so organized and diligent. The other adults, most of them volunteers, seemed confused and had no idea what to do. Was everyone so overwhelmed at the idea of Emery being in the show that things had fallen apart even before he’d come on stage?
“Listen to those kids,” Andy stage whispered, as if no one else had noticed. A group of boys were now whooping and screeching, which would have put off eighty six year old Mr. Brown, who was attempting to sing a song from last century. He carried on valiantly—because of his deafness—although it would have put off a better man. “What the hell’s going on?”
“I don’t know, but they need someone to sort it out,” she whispered back. She went to get up from her seat but Andy pulled her back down.
“It’s not your problem.”
It was her problem, because she knew what to do. She’d been a volunteer more times than she could count and she understood how things should run. She couldn’t sit here and do nothing…none of this would’ve happened if she had just agreed to fall in line and do what Trisha asked when she came into the bookstore to ask her to volunteer. If she had agreed, and was backstage helping, rather than sitting here in the audience with Andy, the holiday concert wouldn’t be a mess. This was all her fault.
She looked around and shrank back into her seat as acquaintances’ eyes met hers. Were they judging her, wondering why she was selfishly sitting
in the audience while the production was falling apart? Behind her, a woman leaned forward. “Wow, they really needed you this year.”
“It’s not Elizabeth’s fault.” Andy turned around, springing to her defense. “It’s not her problem either.”
“It’s the town’s problem,” she said, pulling him to turn back to her, “and I’m not going to sit here and watch the concert fall apart.”
“Do you want to leave?” Andy asked. “I can see you’re uncomfortable. Come on, let’s go.” He urged her out of her seat.
She ignored him, instead turning her attention back to the stage. The Mayor was speaking, and a gasp went up from the audience as he told them there was a change to the main act as Emery had left town.
She turned to Andy, and he looked as shocked as she felt.
Harmony trudged on stage, looking as if she was about to cry.
Elizabeth brought her hand across her mouth…she hadn’t seen Harmony on stage singing for years, not since the incident when she’d embarrassingly frozen as she was about to perform. What on the earth was going on?
“Let’s get out of here,” Andy said. He stood, again taking her hand and pulling her up from her seat. “Look, we’re not the only ones leaving.”
A large number of people had left their seats and were now fighting for position to exit the building and get back to their homes.
Harmony’s singing voice cut through the chatter that was now threatening to shut down the event. Her sweet voice wavered—her lack of confidence was painfully apparent. The children, who’d already gotten out of control, paid no attention to their teacher singing and their laughter, screams and chatter became louder, threatening to drown her out completely. Harmony was aware of it too, and she turned back toward the curtain, and stopped singing.
Elizabeth froze, her heart filling with sympathy, and Andy tried to pull her to the aisle. “I can’t do this,” she grumbled, pulling against him.
“What?” He frowned, his forehead riveted with lines. “Come on, let’s go.” His tone was impatient, rankling her.
“I can’t leave now. Look at Harmony up there. She needs help.”
“Don’t be silly, there’s nothing you can do to help her. Everyone’s upset about Emery Dante. It’s to be expected.”
The feelings she’d been battling overwhelmed her. “I can’t leave, Andy…not just this concert, but this town. Ever. But you...should go.” She pulled away from his hand, and squeezed past him before he could stop her. Then she climbed backstage to help out, like she should’ve done all along.
Eighteen
Andy
Andy sat out in the car waiting for Elizabeth, his heart tearing apart. Were her harsh words due to the stress of the situation, or were they a reflection of her true feelings? He suspected the latter, and because of this he knew he should leave, but if he left, how would she get home? Whatever she’d said to him, he wouldn’t leave her stuck at night. While he sat there, he tried to figure out what had made her react the way she had. Guilt was his best guess. He’d seen similar reactions during his time in the military.
He thought she’d been making progress standing up for herself but he was wrong. Maybe he’d pushed her too hard. After all, the habits of a lifetime were hard to break, and the small steps she’d taken might have scared her. Small, sustained change was only usually successful after a long period of time, and it had only been a few weeks since he’d been challenging her to break out of her old ways. He examined everything he’d done, hoping his approach hadn’t seemed confronting to her, but he couldn’t find anything in his conscience that made him uncomfortable. Within minutes of reaching this conclusion he exited the vehicle and made his way back inside.
Inside the Town Hall the crowds were re-congregating and he made his way forward to see why. Harmony was on stage singing, to his surprise with Emery Dante. Their voices soared in beautiful harmony and peoples’ faces were rapt. But Andy had more important things to attend to, and he made his way backstage to see what was going on with Elizabeth.
It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure it out. There were three women surrounding Elizabeth as she struggled to calm the children, encouraging them back out front. One of the women was berating her and he recognized Trisha, the woman who’d tried to push Elizabeth into volunteering. He remembered that Elizabeth had told him that Trisha had been a schoolyard bully, sometimes making Elizabeth’s life difficult at high school. Now it looked to him as if she was in the same mode, and determined to prove her power.
Not tonight, not with Elizabeth…and certainly not with me here. No one messes with my girl.
He vaulted up onto the stage. “Hey, babe. Let’s get going.” He took hold of her hand, putting light pressure on her to join him. “They’ve got this.”
“Actually, we could do with her help.”
He whipped around, having recognized the voice. “Mona, what are you doing here?”
“I came back a few days ago. I decided I didn't want to miss the concert. Although as I told Harmony, it didn’t seem like it was going to happen, because I saw Emery Dante flying back out to LA as we arrived back. But all’s well that ends well, isn’t it?”
“You didn’t think to tell Elizabeth and I that you were back? We’ve opened the store for you the past two days.”
“I wanted to get ready for Christmas.”
He didn’t have the time to argue with Mona, not now, although he was aghast at her lack of manners. For the moment, though, his priority was his girl. He grabbed her hand again. “Come on.”
Trisha whipped around and glared at him. “She’s not going anywhere.”
The hairs on the back of his neck stood up and his hands clenched with anger, but he wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, in case he’d misunderstood what she was saying. “I beg your pardon?”
“I said she has to stay here. She’s not done cleaning up yet.”
He took a step closer to her, and staggered at her nerve, made his words plain. “Actually, Trisha, she is finished here. And grow up, please. You might have done it to her back at school, but you can’t keep pushing people around forever. This was your thing, so you clean up. You’re lucky Elizabeth came back to help out at all with the kids. She didn’t have to, you know. We were on a date.”
Trisha bristled with indignation, the same way she had that day she’d tried to push Elizabeth to volunteer back in the bookstore. She opened her mouth, wanting to say more, but before she could he turned his back on her, scooped up Elizabeth in his arms and carried her away.
He felt like a knight saving a damsel in distress from her captor, but to his surprise Elizabeth wasn’t impressed. She wriggled in his arms, and when he put her down outside she looked even more upset than she had before, although he’d rescued her. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
“I have to live here,” she whimpered as he led her to the car. “And this is embarrassing.”
“But you don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Have to live here. You could come away with me. This town’s not your problem. You don’t have to take care of everything and everyone. When are you going to get that, Elizabeth? No one here even appreciates you. They use you, they disrespect you, and they abuse you.” He could’ve gone on forever, but she turned away, tears in her eyes.
“Just drive,” she grumbled, and he put the car into gear and drove toward her house.
When they reached her place and he thought that they might finally have a talk or get to finish off their date, she jumped out of the car, strode up the path and into the house, not even waiting for him. He sat there a moment, composing his thoughts, wanting to start a fresh conversation on a better footing.
She’d left the front door open for him, but once inside, he saw she was standing at her bedroom door. The anger had left her face and his heart lifted.
“I’m going to sleep. I don’t want to talk about any of this.” She shut the door firmly behind her, and the sound of the lock t
urning tore at his heart.
He slumped on the couch in the living room, hoping she’d come out again, but after an hour when she hadn’t, he knew he was on his own. With a sigh, he made his way to the spare room and settled in for the night. This was not how any of this was supposed to go. He thought women liked to be saved…where had he gone wrong?
As he tossed and turned sleepless in bed, he knew he should retreat. If Elizabeth wasn’t going to go traveling with him, he might as well put this behind him and get going on his own. The town had left such a sour taste in his mouth that he might never choose to return. As he acknowledged this truth, his gut swam with toxins, but his heart told him he was right. Since Elizabeth didn’t want to see him, it would be better for him to stay away. If he ever saw her again, it might hurt so much the pain would never stop.
Nineteen
Elizabeth
Alone in her bed, Elizabeth cried herself to sleep. Her emotions were mixed, leaving her exhausted. On the one hand, she wanted to be with Andy, but her heart couldn’t believe that a relationship with this man would work out. He’d get bored with her, wonder why he’d asked her to join him on his travels, and she’d be isolated far from home. Then there was what he’d done tonight—embarrassed her in front of others, and called Trisha out. Yes, he was right to do so, and nothing he’d said was untrue, but still, for someone as accommodating as her, the situation had been uncomfortable. Maybe she wasn’t ready to learn to stand up for herself, or have someone else do so. Possibly the role of doormat was what suited her, and what she deserved.
Eventually she fell asleep, but her slumber was shallow and she tossed and turned, lost in a myriad of otherworldly dreams. She woke slowly the next morning, lying in bed wondering how she was going to face Andy. Somehow she would, because she had to. She couldn’t stay in her room all day. Even if she wanted to, she had to eat.