by J Bree
I glance over at Avery and find the whole lot of them are watching our every move. This sibling rivalry was dangerous, best to steer clear of it. “I'm fine. It takes a lot to bother me.”
Joseph smiles again and stands up.
“Oh, I'm counting on it.” he says with a wink then leaves me alone.
What a dramatic asshole, I think as I tuck back into my food.
He's true to his word. I can feel the eyes of the other students on me but no one approaches me for the rest of the day.
I'm not looking forward to my tutoring session with Ash after my conversation with his brother. I still meet with him three times a week for an hour, though I have no idea how much I'm actually helping him. He's an infuriating student, we go around and around in circles and when I'm ready to strangle the life from him he writes out the answers perfectly as if he's known all along.
I arrive early to set up, like I always do, but this time Ash has beaten me there. He's brooding, all dark and frowning, and when he sees me coming he crosses his arms and glares at me.
“If you're going to be like this the whole hour I'm just going to go study if my room.”
“If you think my brother wants to be your friend then you are a dense Mounty slut.” he snaps at me.
Oh the ways I would break this boy if I didn't desperately need my scholarship. I sit, because I also need the credits I get for these sessions, and then I fold my own arms to mirror him.
“It is such a joy to spend this time with you. Rest assured that I don't trust a single hair on the heads of any human bearing the name Beaumont.”
His eyes narrow and he leans in towards me. “Then why did you agree to go to his party?”
I roll my eyes at him and start setting up my books. I have assignments due in every damn class so I don't have the time to explain myself to this ass. “What do you need help with today? I know you must have the same economics stuff due so let's work on that.”
“Fuck economics, why did you agree?”
He is the single most infuriating human I had ever met. Even Avery is easier to deal with, all smiles and knives in the back. How do you inform the privileged that you're just trying to survive when they can't see the danger from their vantage point? I want to kick him under the table.
“Maybe I don't enjoy having guys follow me around all day begging me for sex. Maybe I'm starting to get worried I'll have to fight one of them off who won't take no for an answer. Maybe it's easier to go to a party than be on my guard all the fucking time, now do you want to do the assignment or not?”
We were starting to attract the attention of the other students around us. I'd rather not be at the centre of another Hannaford scandal but Ash is oblivious. “Go to the school staff then. Go tell your student advisor. Do anything else.”
“Why do you care? Your sister has been my biggest torturer so why are you telling me to stay away from Joseph and not Avery?” I hiss at him, all my patience gone.
The glare he levels at me is his best yet. A shiver runs down my spine but I refuse to back down. “Don't ever compare them.”
“Why not, she's just as cruel as he is.”
He snaps forward in his chair and grabs my tie to yank me forward. Our faces are so close together I can feel his breath on my lips and I fight the urge to lick them. Or lick his lips. God I need some serious therapy. I wonder if my scholarship covers that?
“My sister is perfect. She is selfless, smart, and the kindest person I know. Joey is a sociopath. Don’t you ever forget it.” he whispers and I feel the words on my skin.
He doesn't let me go. If anything he pulls me closer and I can feel the heat of his lips on my own. My face flushes. My legs are trembling and he smells unbelievably good. Maybe all my time spent with the Jackal has damaged me permanently because lusting after a guy who despises me so deeply must mean I’m irreparably broken.
“Don't go to the party, Mounty.”
I roll my eyes and he lets me go suddenly. I slump back into my seat like a rag doll and try not to think about how hard my nipples are underneath my thin blouse. I straighten up and roll my shoulders. I glance over to see the librarians eyeing us both but they don't approach. How easy life must be with Beaumont as your last name.
Ash looks completely unaffected and just opens up his text books. He's starting with history because he's a pompous brat who won't do anything I ask him to. He's pulling out his notes when I finally snap. “You know he tells people you're fucking Avery. He's told half the school that you four are having some big orgy every night and someday he’ll be an uncle to a deformed incestuous child.”
Ash stops and grins. I think it's the first true smile I've ever seen on him. Clearly he has a twisted sense of humor if he finds that funny.
“And you believe him? Are you asking me if I'm fucking my own sister.” His voice is sultry and seductive and promises dark things. I swear he can see how hard my nipples are and he's messing with me.
“No. I just thought you should know.”
Ash doesn't look up from his notes. “I'm well aware of the depths of Joey’s depravity. I do have to live him occasionally.”
It’s hard to choose between the Beaumont boys. Which devil should I trust? Neither of them is the obvious answer but I have to make a decision on whether or not to go to the party. What’s the worst that can happen to me there? A lot of things but how many of those could actually break me? Very little.
I feel like no matter what I choose, I'm going to get burned.
The rest of the week is so blissfully quiet that I should have known something was up.
Harley doesn't speak to me in class, Ash is quiet and studious during our library sessions, I barely see Avery, and I manage to completely avoid seeing Blaise altogether. If I could keep this up I would have a great year.
I eat dinner by myself, reading the Iliad for Lit while I chew. I can zone the entire room out that way and get ahead with my homework for the weekend. I might even be able to take a day off and sleep for the whole day.
That would be incredible.
I make it to my room with no interruptions and I grab my pajamas to head in to have a shower before bed. The group bathroom is empty and I feel as though I've won the lottery. I take my time, washing my hair and shaving every inch of unwanted hair until I'm feeling like a smooth goddess. When I still lived with my mom we never had hot water so showers were rare and quick. During winter I'd only really shower at school after gym. It was gross to think about now but it was all I could do at the time. Once I got moved to the group house showers were hot but on timers so the water would shut off after two minutes. Still, it felt like a luxury to me to have those two minutes every day.
Most of the girls in my dorm shower twice a day and can easily spend twenty minutes under the hot spray. I find it shocking and wasteful but none of them even realize the small luxuries they have.
After the fourth passover with the soap I know I'm just lingering to enjoy the warmth soaking through my skin into my bones. I'm as clean as I'm ever going to get. I reach for my towel and find it's not in the stall with me. I frown because I'm pretty sure I brought it in with me but I open the door anyway.
My bag is gone.
I have no towel, no clothes, absolutely nothing to dry myself with or to cover my naked body.
Fucking Avery, I think but there's nothing I can do about it. I start to shiver now I'm out of the heat of the water. This is bad.
I can feel tears prickling at the corners of my eyes but I refuse to cry. Losing my clothes and having to walk back to my room naked isn't great but I've survived worse. I can feel the panic start in my chest and I count backwards from a hundred. In French, just to really keep my mind busy.
This isn't so bad. Foster care meant I was forced to shower around other girls all of the time. It's practically the same thing, except the other girls will probably be standing around laughing. Oh god.
Cent, quatre-vingt-dix-neuf, quatre-vingt-dix-huit,
I’m
not ashamed or embarrassed by my body. I used to be scrawny, too thin and lanky for my frame, but the months here at Hannaford have put some meat on my bones. I have boobs for the first time in my life too, nice ones and big enough that they would hide the scars on the left side. I didn't need Avery seeing that and digging around in my past. I am more than a little shy about how many scars I have. My leg is mottled with red and white raised skin after all of the operations to put it back together. I have a burn on my hip that I can't think about without triggering my PTSD and then there's the two perfect circles on my shoulder. Bullet in, bullet out. Would these girls know what a healed bullet wound looks like? Would they question me about it?
Could I handle them asking without lashing out?
When I'm sure I won't cry or scream at these rich bitches I open the bathroom door and start walking back to my room. It's maybe thirty steps and I force myself not to run.
The giggling starts the second the door opens.
I don't look down at myself, I don't look over at the giggling to see which girls are watching, don't cross my arms over my boobs.
Head held high, looking straight ahead, fuck the lot of them.
The giggles sputter out. I'm not doing what they expect me to. I'm not crying or breaking down. I'm not screaming at them.
I make it to my door and find my bag sitting on the floor. I bend down to pick it up and then I catch Avery’s eye as I straighten. She's not laughing or smiling. She's just watching me. Her eyes are cold on mine and I think about how Ash described her.
She doesn't seem very kind to me.
I lock my door behind me and throw my clothes on with trembling hands. It takes me a minute to realize Avery must have had the opportunity to case my room while I was in the shower if she had my bag and my key and I rip the loose board up to check my safe is still there untouched. Once I’m sure it hasn’t been tampered with I spend two hours pulling everything else apart in my room until I'm sure there isn't anything missing or a hidden camera planted. That's all I need, that girl having video of me drooling in my sleep. Or dancing around with my headphones in listening to Blaise’s crooning. I shudder at the thought.
When I finally put my room back together I climb between my sheets and text Matteo. I need something, anything, from someone who cares about me and, in his own twisted way, Matteo does.
Do you remember when I drank for the first time and you told me I was too good for that kind of thing? I think I'm going to go out next week and I think I may end up in a fight.
If I see Avery while I'm drinking she may not walk out of it alive.
You could call in a favor. There are many people that would take care of your problems for you.
I could.
But I won't.
Chapter Six
By the time I make it to breakfast on Monday the photos, yes photos, of my naked walk have been seen by the entire school.
The first guy to approach me about it gets ignored but the second guy gets a bloody nose. He made the mistake of telling me how much he wanted to watch my tits bounce while he fucked me and I take note of his name when his friend calls out to him while he slinks away. Spencer Hillsong is a dick.
I don't get approached after that. I eat breakfast in my usual spot and there's a three chair buffer on every side of me, like no one is willing to risk my violence.
That is until Joseph Beaumont sits across from me again.
“I hope you're not embarrassed, Mounty. I'm actually impressed with what you've got going on under the uniform, I didn't realize your rack was so big.”
I don't even glance up at him. I'm reading the last book I need to for Lit for the year, having spent the entire weekend studying like a fiend to keep myself distracted. I hadn't gone to the dining hall to eat so I'm starving and my plate is overflowing with eggs and bacon.
“Aww, don’t be like that Mounty. Nudes are an everyday thing here at Hannaford. I can show you mine if you want, I'm quite the photographer.”
I would rather gouge my eyeballs out than see Joeys dick. I think about telling him that but it's more appealing to ignore him until he fucks off.
“Cold shoulder and I'm trying so hard. You're a hard girl to befriend. I could deal with Avery for you, you know. Would that win me your trust?” he coos at me.
“No.” I look up at his cold, blue eyes. The colour and shape is identical to his siblings but they don’t feel the same. Looking into Joseph Beaumont’s eyes was like staring into a void.
I get the impression that this boy tortures his siblings for the simple pleasure of it and I have no interest in being dragged into it. Besides, I was starting to get ideas of what I would do to Avery senior year when graduation came closer and my chances of being expelled were drastically reduced.
I'd destroy that girl.
But I'd do it myself, I wouldn't hide behind her evil brother.
“She speaks! Are we talking now or are you insisting on freezing me out?”
“What exactly would you like to talk about, Joseph?” I put down my book and fold my arms. His eyes trace over my chest and I clench my jaw because I know he's thinking about the damned photos.
“Call me Joey, my father is Joseph. Let’s talk about my party. We're going to the edge of the school boundaries, there's a small woodland area that I've made my own. I'll pick you up after curfew and personally walk you down there so you don’t run into any trouble.”
I didn't want to go to the damned party at all. How many of the guys would proposition me there? Would Avery and the boys be there and would I get drunk and confront her? It was a recipe for disaster. I open my mouth to say so when Harley sits down next to me.
I glance around but he's alone.
“What the fuck do you want, degenerate?” Joey sneers at him. Harley looks at him the same way you would look at dog shit you've just stepped in. His uniform is crisp and new so I guess Avery finally wore him down enough for him to replace his older one. He looks hot but then he always does.
“Lips and I have a Chemistry assignment to discuss.” True but we had already finished the assignment. Neither of us leave things to the last minute.
“Well, fuck off and talk to her about it later. We're busy.”
A slow smile works it's way across Harley's face and he starts to eat his eggs. His plate is even bigger than mine. He’s a solid guy but I get the impression it’s all muscle so he must spend serious time in the gym. The image of him in a tank and gym shorts flits into my head and I lock the image down fast. I do not need to get turned on surrounded by these assholes.
“I'm good here. Lips and I are regular desk buddies. She enjoys my company, you know. I don’t have to taunt her to get her to speak to me.”
Joey scowls at him but I refuse to speak to either of them. Instead I pick my book back up and zone their bullshit out. Joey finally gets up and storms off. Harley doesn't say a word, just eats his eggs and smells delicious.
“I don't need rescuing.” I say as I turn the page. He snorts at me.
“Everyone needs rescuing from Joey Beaumont. You shouldn't be speaking to him, if he sits here again get up and walk away.”
“Oh yeah, and what should I do if Avery sits here?” Harley pauses and then puts his fork down. I watch as his face does a complicated dance before settling into what I think is an attempt at a sincere look.
“I know you won't believe me but Avery didn't set you up and she definitely didn't take the photos.”
It's my turn to snort. I give up on my eggs and start in on my apple instead. I kind of want to vomit thinking about how many people were looking and laughing at the photos. It's bad enough that I have to put down the apple too.
“Think about it. Plus, I haven't looked at them. If Joey actually gave a shit about your feelings he wouldn't have looked at them either. He's a snake in the grass.”
No, he’s not in the grass. He’s a snake that’s wrapped around your throat. “You expect me to believe you care about my feelings?”
; He pauses shoveling his food into his mouth and says, “Nah. I just don't find naked photos all that great without consent. I have enough sent to me from willing partners that I don't feel the need to look at yours.”
That's…really decent. Like, a really human and empathetic thing to say. I have to fight back tears. This place was making me soft.
I sniff and say, “You're not missing much, I'm just a scrawny Mounty.”
He laughs but it's not as cruel as it usually sounds.
My go-to reaction to the gossip and whispers from other students is to stare at them like they're stupid until they get uncomfortable and leave me alone.
It works well and by the time I get to the library for my tutoring I've used this against a decent enough amount of people that now everywhere I walk the other students clear a path. I think they're waiting for me to snap. I kind of am too.
I sit at my usual table and get started on my assignments. I'm now five weeks ahead of schedule in every class except choir.
Ash walks in ten minutes later and joins me, sitting at his usual seat across from me. He doesn't speak while he gets out his textbooks and notes.
“Do you need help today?” I say without looking up.
“I'll ask if I do.” He replies and I give him a curt nod.
We work in silence and I enjoy the time to just focus on what I need to get done. For once it doesn't feel hostile, more companionable. When the bell goes I stay put. I'm only half way through a Math worksheet and to my surprise Ash does too. The rest of the library starts to empty and a girl from our year comes to lean against the table, twirling a strand of her long russet hair around her finger. She's gorgeous but she was also present for my walk so I throw her a filthy look before turning back to my work.
“Hey. You didn't come out last night, I was waiting for you.” The girl, no idea what her name is, says in a seductive tone. I try not to gag. Ash doesn't look very impressed. I try not to feel pleased about that but I fail miserably.