by Snow, Jenika
“Devon,” I whispered his name, surprised I’d been able to get even that out.
“I don’t want to lose the best thing that has ever happened to me.” God, his anxious eyes were killing me. “And that’s you.”
I wanted to reach out and embrace him. I wanted that desperately. But I was afraid.
“But I don’t just want my best friend back, Leila.” Confusion settled in me. What did he mean? There was a long pause before he continued, and I saw his throat work as he swallowed, his nervousness very clear now. “I want to be the man you turn to as more than just a friend.”
The world stopped.
“Do you understand me?”
I shook my head as if I were on autopilot. I knew what I wanted it to mean but didn’t want to say it in case I was so, so wrong.
“I’m in love with you, Leila. So in love with you I can’t even picture a life without you in it.”
My heart jumped to my throat at his confession. It was what I’d been wanting to hear for so long, and here he was confiding in me, telling me how he felt… that he was in love with me.
And as much as I wanted to tell him I was in love with him as well, the words were lodged in my throat. The silence that stretched between us was suffocating. He watched me so intently, and I felt like fear of the unknown had me frozen, unable to speak, unable to be honest too.
“I’m in love with you too.” I finally said the words that had been stuck in my throat. His eyes widened a second as if he were truly surprised I felt the same way, and then his grin spread across his face.
“God, Leila,” he murmured. “I’ve been dreaming of hearing you say that for so long.” He pulled me in for an embrace, and I closed my eyes, letting this feeling consume me. I loved him so much, but I wasn’t done being honest.
“I’m pregnant.” Those two words were whispered, but I knew he heard me. His body tightened as if he were stone, and he slowly pulled back to stare into my eyes.
And now this was where shit would hit the fan.
When those words left my mouth, everything around me seemed to still. I watched as the surprise on Devon’s face turned to an array of emotions, but I couldn’t grasp which ones they were, which one was strongest.
“Devon?” My heart was in my throat again. “Please, say something.” I couldn’t stand this silence.
His eyes dropped to my belly, and I involuntarily placed my hand over it, even though it was flat and I was obviously not showing yet.
For several long, tense moments, he did nothing but stare at my stomach, his entire body so tense he seemed unmovable.
“Leila?” He finally looked up at me, his voice cracking as he said my name.
“I—” I didn’t know what to say now.
“How long have you known?” His expression seemed so… earnest.
I swallowed down my fear, glad this was finally being discussed and out in the open.
“I confirmed at the doctor today,” I muttered. “It’s yours,” I said, really wanting him to know. “You were...” God, should I tell him I’d been a virgin? Might as well get all the truths out there. “You were the first and only guy I’ve ever been with, Devon.” I swore the air grew thick, thick enough a knife could have sliced right through it.
He stared at me, not speaking, and I couldn’t read his expression.
“It’s mine.” He didn’t phrase it like a question, and thank God for that. “I’m going to be a father.” He sounded so… mesmerized.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I was afraid to say anything. I was afraid of all the unknowns and if this would push us away even more. I was already feeling so unsure about the night we were together, and this just set me over the edge, and I retreated.”
He was shaking his head. “Leila, I understand. I might not have then, but I do now, baby. I understand, and it’s okay. God, it’s okay. I’m here now. You’re here now. That’s all that matters.”
Before I could say anything or even contemplate what he was about to do, Devon had his hands on my waist and hauled me onto his lap. I was so stunned by the sudden, jarring movement that I couldn’t do anything but grip his wide, powerful shoulders and hold on.
He stared into my eyes, and I sucked in a breath at what I saw on his face.
Happiness.
“Be with me. Be mine, Leila.” There was so much need in his voice. “Move in with me. Let me take care of you and our baby.”
I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt the hot tears track down my cheeks, until Devon lifted his hand and smoothed his thumb over my flesh, wiping them away.
“I love you, Leila,” he said as he leaned in, peppering my face with kisses. “I’m so in love with you that hearing this news, hearing you say you’re in love with me too, is like I’ve won the fucking lottery.”
I was bawling now, not even trying to hide it or stop myself. I cupped his cheeks, the days’ worth of stubble along his skin soft against my palms.
“Thank you,” I whispered.
His brows knitted in confusion. “For what, baby?”
“For being a good guy.”
He gave me a small smile. “That’s never something you have to thank me for. Being a good guy comes naturally when you’re in my life. You make me want to be a better person.” He pulled me in closer and kissed me, and as our lips pressed together, as the comfort and affection started growing into something more passionate, all I could think about was how I needed Devon.
I needed him now, and it looked—felt—like he needed me too.
18
Devon
I should’ve been gentle with her, but there was no fucking way I could control myself, not when emotions were high, the truth out in the open now.
My self-control was slowly waning. I couldn’t breathe, felt dizzy, insane with lust, with need. I was ravenous for Leila, starved for her. I desperately wanted to hear Leila calling out my name over and over again when the ecstasy became too much.
“Leila,” I groaned, trying to rein in my desire, but I felt like I was standing on a razor’s edge.
We all but tore off each other’s clothing, both of us having this frantic need to be with the other. It was like a current moving between us, back and forth, over and over again. I was so far gone in my need, in my love for this woman, there was no stopping this, no stopping me.
She laid back fully, and I shifted so I could really look at her. Despite the shadows in the room, I saw every perfect inch of her. I lifted my hand and ran it over my mouth, a deep groan being ripped from me as I stared at her body, as I looked at her spread out for me.
She was my offering.
I shouldn’t be filthy, but fuck if I could help myself. “Spread your legs for me.”
“Touch yourself,” she ordered in return, and I growled, loving how my girl was making demands.
I reached for my cock, stroking myself from root to tip, showing her exactly what was hers, just like she did for me right now as she spread those pretty thighs of hers.
I reminded myself to breathe. There was no way I could be slow and gentle. No fucking way. And when she slipped her hand over her belly and between her thighs, I snapped. I was on top of her a second later, using my body to spread her legs even more, feeling her heat and wetness. God, she was primed for me.
She reached up and held me to her, pulling me closer so my upper body was pressed to hers, my lower body cradled between her legs.
“I need you, need to be inside you,” I murmured against her throat, and she speared her fingers through my hair, tugging at the strands. I should have made love to her after the revelation she told me, after we professed our love, but I snapped. I needed to claim her, plain and simple.
“I need you inside me, Devon.”
“Leila,” I groaned and moved my mouth to hers, let my lips trail over hers a second before I speared my tongue into the hot recesses of what she offered.
She writhed beneath me, her pussy rubbing along my cock as she ground herself agai
nst me, as she tried to fuck herself on me.
“God.” I broke the kiss and moved down the length of her body, trailing kisses on her skin, paying extra attention to her belly, feeling weak and helpless but so fucking happy that she was pregnant.
And then I had my face between her thighs, my breath moving along the most intimate part of her. With my hands on her inner thighs, I kept her legs spread for me and stared at her pussy.
I dragged my tongue through her slit, licking up her cream, swallowing it, and taking a part of her into my body. I held her in place as I ate her out, as I fucked her with my lips and tongue. I became a beast then, digging my fingers into the soft flesh of her inner thighs, knowing I’d leave marks on her.
She was smooth and silky against my tongue, and I couldn’t get enough. I was drunk off the flavor and feel of her, how she tugged at my hair, rubbed her pussy against my mouth for more. I wanted to have my face buried between her thighs until every part of me was numb, until all I could feel, smell, taste was Leila.
I started dry humping the mattress, grinding my cock against the bed, needing to relieve the pressure. And when I felt her body tense and knew she was coming, I sucked her clit into my mouth and let her give me her climax.
When she started to come down from her high, when her body stopped quivering, I moved up her body and claimed her mouth, plunging my tongue between her lips and forcing her to taste her sweet, musky flavor.
My dick was pressed between her slick folds, her cunt framing my cock perfectly. She opened her mouth wider and dueled her tongue with mine. I pressed my hips against hers, my cock sliding right between the center of her, gathering her wetness, moving fluidly against her.
Leila made a soft sound in the back of her throat, and I leaned back, bracing my hands beside her, looking down at her body, taking in every inch, every curve. I grew harder, needier for her. My cock was a steel rod between my legs, pre-cum dotting the tip.
“Christ.” I glanced up at her face. “I love you.” I wanted her as my wife, the mother of my children… as my everything.
I needed to be inside her. I stroked my cock again, the pleasure consuming me.
“Be with me,” she whispered, and I was right there with her, placing the tip of my dick at her entrance and praying to God I held out long enough for her to get off for me.
While staring into her eyes, I buried my cock in her wet, tight pussy. She gasped, and I stilled, letting her get accustomed to my size, my girth. Her pussy muscles contracted around me, and I grunted.
I started pulling out and pushing back into her. I felt how wet she was getting for me, how she was losing control.
Just like me.
In and out. Faster. Harder. I fucked her good and thorough.
My heart raced. I wanted to come so badly, to give her that part of myself. I pushed in deep and stilled, feeling my muscles relax and contract. Her pussy milked me for my cum, and I grunted. I wasn’t going to last even if I wanted this to go on all damn night.
“I’m going to—” She mewled then came for me.
I started slamming in and out of her then, fucking her so we could both go over the edge together.
“Devon!” she cried out, her pussy rhythmically clenching around me.
I reached between us and started rubbing her clit.
“Yes,” she whispered.
Back and forth, I rubbed that little bundle of nerves until she dug her nails into my skin, tore at my flesh so the pleasure and pain coexisted. And when she tensed beneath me, moaning softly, her voice rising higher, I knew she was going over the edge once again.
“Fuck yes,” I groaned.
“Devon,” she cried out, and the sound of my name spilling from her lips had never sounded sweeter.
My orgasm rose up like a beast. Just before I came inside her, filling her up with my cum, I pulled out. I grabbed my cock and stroked my hand over my length, my balls drawn up tight. The pleasure consumed me, controlled me. My orgasm washed through me, claimed me. It was never-ending. It was uncontrollable.
I covered her smooth, flawless skin with my seed, white ropes of my desire painting her like a canvas and I was the artist.
I forced my eyes to stay open as I came. I needed to stare at her, to watch her, to make her see I was right here with her. And when the pleasure started to fade, only then did I collapse on top of her, breathing out, my chest rising and falling harshly, sweat covering my body.
Leila was mine. All mine.
I felt even more territorial of her now.
And when I rose up slightly, I looked into her face. For a long time, we didn’t speak, but nothing needed to be said.
“Devon,” she whispered, and everything in me clenched with need. “I’ve always been yours, Devon. Always.”
Pleasure slammed into me. This raw, powerful sound of need and desperation came from me almost violently.
It was primal.
I was primal.
“I can’t ever let you go, baby. I don’t have it in me. I’m far too selfish, far too obsessed with the love I have for you.” I pulled her in close and buried my nose in her hair, inhaling, groaning. “My life goal is to have you as mine always. Always, Leila.” I had never considered myself a gentle man, one who let his emotions consume him. But with Leila, she changed all that. But only for her. Only ever for her. “Knowing you love me has changed everything.”
She’d never know how deep my love for her ran, how it consumed me, shaped the person I was… made me crazed for more time with her.
We’d always been meant to be together, and I’d make sure that was always our reality, our future.
19
Devon
I held her. I never wanted to let her go. Tightening my arms around Leila, I felt the way her breathing changed to a more even pace, knew she would fall asleep within minutes.
Never in my life had I envisioned this would be the outcome. I sure as hell hoped for it many times over the years, fantasized about her being mine, but that was all it had been… a dream. But it wasn’t just wishful thinking anymore.
It was my reality.
It was ours.
“I really hope my parents didn’t hear us.” There was amusement in her voice, and I couldn’t help but smile. “I feel like I’m a teenager all over again, sneaking a boy into my room and praying my folks don’t hear.”
Although I obviously knew she’d been a virgin when we’d been together, the very thought of her having any boys in here at any point in her life had possessive jealousy moving through me. She must’ve sensed it, felt the tightening of my body, which was an involuntary reaction, because she shifted a little bit so she could look into my face.
I saw a little smirk curving her full, bow-like lips. “Does that make you jealous, thinking about me having boys down here?” The amusement and teasing lacing her voice had me leaning down and kissing her. I just couldn’t help myself.
“You know damn well it makes me jealous,” I growled but had a grin on my face. I pulled back, her scent enveloping me, this sweet, lemony aroma I’d never get enough of. Her face took on a somber expression, and she rested her head on my chest, her hand on my abdomen. “Hey, what’s wrong?” I noticed the change in her instantly. It was like a frigid blast surrounded us.
“Are you afraid?” Leila whispered so low I almost didn’t hear.
I started running the pads of my fingers along her side, up and down, gently stroking her, feeling goosebumps move along her flesh. The sheet was pooled down around her waist, and although she was petite, she still had very womanly curves.
“No,” I said adamantly. “This is all I’ve ever wanted, Leila. You, a future together, a family.” She tipped her head back so she could look into my face, and I saw she was smiling, that she loved my answer. “And it’s all coming true,” I added. “My regret is that I never told you sooner, that it took a night of drinking for us to experience our first time together, that it made you uncomfortable.” I stared right into her eyes. “I�
�m sorry you felt the need to put this wall between us because you were that afraid.” I slowly shook my head. “I don’t ever want you to be afraid to tell me anything, Leila. I want to not only be yours, but I want you to be mine. I want us to be able to share everything, the good things, the bad, the things that terrify us.” She smiled and nodded. “I want to be your rock, the person you lean on.” I willed her to feel how real those words were. “Do you understand?”
She slowly nodded and then shifted so she was now sitting up on the bed. The sheet dropped lower around her hips, her upper body gloriously naked, the feminine slopes of her breasts on full display. I could’ve taken her again right then and there, but that wasn’t what this moment was about. Instead, I let my gaze linger over her breasts, along her ribs, and stopped at her stomach. She was tiny, and I imagined the swell of her belly getting bigger, our child growing within it.
I reached out and placed my palm on her belly, closing my eyes and having a very vivid picture of being able to feel my baby kick when she is further along. It had me smiling. And when I looked into her face again, it was to see that those tears were back in her eyes. But I knew they were happy ones.
“I love you,” she said.
I slid both hands to her waist and hauled her on top of me, her legs on either side of my hips. I lifted my upper body a little bit and slammed my mouth on hers, kissing her, claiming those lush lips, stroking her tongue with mine. “I love you more than I can ever tell you,” I murmured against her mouth.
I meant every single word of that. I meant it so much that love wasn’t even a strong enough word to describe what I felt for her.
But it would do… for now.
20
Leila
“Are you sure about this?” Devon tightened his hand on mine as we ascended the basement steps.