by Bella Klaus
The cab slowed at the palace gates, where the guards peered through the windows and waved us through. I dabbed my damp hands on my pants, sending out a silent prayer that Caiman could access Valentine’s vaults. Failing that, I hoped one of the princes was around to take pity on Valentine’s soon-to-be-devoured fiancée.
The pristine white building glowed in the light of the moon as the vehicle slowed down the driveway. Even the water spouting from fountains we passed turned silver in the majesty of our surroundings, but I could barely appreciate the view with the threat of Nut and Geb.
“Here we are,” said the driver. “Lamia Palace. Mind how you go.”
One of the footmen rushed down the external steps, opened the door, and bowed. “Good evening, My Lady.”
“Could you find Caiman, please?”
With a nod, he hurried up the steps and through the line of guards securing the door.
Geb stepped out, and Nut wrapped a meaty hand around my bicep, making me freeze. I turned to my former bodyguard and frowned. “It’s not like I can run away.”
“No,” she said in the voice that made the lining of my stomach rumble.
Not bothering to ask for clarification, I scooted across the seat and stepped out with the demoness clamped around me like a vise.
Caiman appeared at the top of the stairs, clad in his usual black jacket, burgundy waistcoat, and a broadsword hanging from his belt. “Nut and Geb?” he asked. “His Majesty informed me that you might return to the palace for payment. Please, follow me.”
The tension melted off my muscles, and I sagged against Nut. Valentine had thought of everything. When the demoness released my bicep and patted me on the head with her large palm, all I could feel was a relief deeper than the ocean. At least now I could focus on finding a way to destroy Kresnik with Valentine behind bars.
The butler led us through a darkened hallway that reminded me of the special viewing rooms of museums. Ancient weapons hung suspended within glass displays. Each was labelled with a description of which duel or battle it was last used.
On the other side were items fashioned in precious metals, ranging from antique teapots to headgear to jewelry. We passed crowns and pendants. We passed amulets and armlets, bracelets and breastplates, coronets and circlets, each studded with an array of precious gems.
A pair of guards stood at the end of the displays, in front of a door marked PRIVATE.
A female vampire sat behind a white desk within a white room, wearing a black coat that wrapped around her body like a straitjacket. From her expressionless, pale, and unlined features, she looked as ancient as Caiman, but warmth shone from her chocolate brown eyes.
“It is a pleasure to meet His Majesty’s fiancée, the Lady Phoenix.” She rose from her seat. “I am the royal treasurer, Atalia Sargon de Akkadian.”
I froze, not knowing if I should bow or curtsey, but in the end, I inclined my head. “I’m pleased to meet you. Please call me Mera.”
“Then you must call me Talia.” The treasurer’s gaze remained fixed on me, even after Geb cleared his throat.
“Valentine hired these bodyguards a couple of months ago, and they’d like to be paid,” I said.
Talia held out a hand. “Invoice, please.”
Geb stepped forward and handed her the scroll. As she unrolled it, Geb spoke in the archaic language, making her frown as she scanned its contents. I chewed the inside of my cheek, waiting for her to turn to me and confirm that I had indeed offered to pay them double the amount on the contract.
When she turned to him and shook her head with a few harsh words, Nut wrapped her fingers around my forearm and snarled.
My heart made its slow descent down my lungs, picking up speed as it raced past my plummeting stomach. I could barely croak out the words, “What’s happening?”
Talia lowered her gaze and said something so quickly it was hard to tell which language she had spoken. I turned pleading eyes to Caiman, who stiffened.
“My Lady,” he said in halting words. “Unfortunately, His Majesty only has enough gold to fulfill his original contract.”
Chapter Fifteen
As though connected by magic, both Nut and Geb turned to me and grinned, their teeth sharpening into points.
I stepped back from the counter with my palms out. “Wait a minute,” I snapped. “You just got a third of your money. We can give you the rest as soon as the bank opens.”
“No.”
Nut’s deep voice resonated through my entire body, a bone-deep shudder that also reached the lining of my stomach. I clenched my teeth. This was the female who took my place when I’d refused that naked sushi dinner. What on earth had he ever seen in her?
“Listen,” I hissed. “You both know I’m capable of defending myself. The moment you so much as touch me with a claw, I’ll turn into a phoenix and burn you both to ash.”
Neither twin made a move toward me, but I wasn’t naive enough to think that my words would have any effect. Somehow, I needed to keep them at bay until Caiman or whoever else was authorized to go to the bank on Valentine’s behalf could get their money.
Geb turned to Caiman and said something in that ancient language. The butler’s features turned pinched, and he shook his head.
“What did he ask?”
“Such a request does not warrant translation,” he said.
“Caiman, please,” I said.
His lips formed a disapproving line, and he lowered his gaze to the counter. After taking in a sharp breath, he spoke. “Mister Geb said he would accept an alternative form of payment.”
“What?” I asked, raising my palm.
“Your firstborn.”
Nut said something next.
“Mistress Nut says she will consider your second should you lay a clutch of eggs.”
I clenched my teeth, glowering from one twin to the other, who still hadn’t put away their sharp teeth. It was no wonder the butler refused them outright. Maybe this was what they’d wanted all along—an opportunity to get a baby phoenix.
Ages had passed since they’d been attacked by November in the slaughterhouse. They could have come to the palace at any time to collect their payment, but they’d waited until now. After I’d returned from being abducted to the Realm of the Gods, while Valentine was behind bars and incapable of paying my debt, and while I was alone and without wealthy allies.
Geb said something else to Caiman and flicked his head toward me as though demanding that the butler translate.
“What did he say?” I asked.
Caiman’s nostrils flared. “No force in this realm could make me relay such an indecent proposal.”
“Isn’t there something else they’ll accept?” I glanced around the room. “Precious gems? Antiques? Weapons?”
Nut said something and gestured at me with a thick finger. Caiman turned to me and said, “The contract states that payment comes in the form of gold or organs.”
“But I don’t have a contract.”
Both twins laughed. It was a harsh sound that grated on my every nerve. Geb spoke a string of words and then stepped back to make Caiman relay them to me in English.
“Master Geb says that you have a verbal contract which was witnessed by the King of Demons himself.” Caiman held his elbows close to his sides, looking like he was trying not to cringe. “He also suggests that you refrain from rehashing this line of conversation, or else.”
I clenched my teeth, meeting the demon’s hard eyes. How much did I want to bet that he hadn’t delivered his message so politely.
The door behind us opened, accompanied by the squeaking of a trolley and the clinking of fine china.
“Tea’s up,” said a voice from behind us.
I would have turned around if it wasn’t for the hungry demons salivating at the prospect of eating my organs.
A fruity scent filled the air. It was sweet and floral and familiar. It caressed my sinuses, curled around my senses, and cajoled me to slumber. My arms became as heav
y as my eyelids, and I swayed on my feet.
My nostrils flared. This had to be Mrs. Meg’s sleepy tea, but what was the old faerie doing here now of all times? I blinked hard, clenched my teeth, rolled my shoulders, and tried to resist the lure of sleep.
The twins opened their mouths with identical yawns, their shoulders drooping. Geb asked Caiman a question, but his words slowed and slurred.
The urge to sleep dragged on my consciousness with thick claws, pulling down on me with an irresistible weight. I shook my head from side to side, trying to resist, but my eyes fluttered shut, and I lost consciousness before I hit the floor.
Warm breath fanned across my skin, and a rough tongue slid down one side of my face. I cracked open an eye to meet the jewel-green gaze of a concerned-looking leopard.
Sunlight streamed in from a window behind us, making the ends of his fur shine like spun gold. He hovered over me like a sphinx, resting his weight on his haunches and with his front legs on either side of my body. If this wasn’t the hellcat I knew and loved, it would look like I’d become a leopard’s latest chew toy.
“Macavity?” I croaked.
He parted his jaws and made a rumbling sound that I think might have been a meow.
“Where are we?”
Macavity rose to his feet and stepped away, revealing the rest of our surroundings. I lay atop a super-king-size bed surrounded by thick gold drapes which had been left open to let in the light.
I rose onto my elbows and peered out through the bed curtains, finding a matching sofa opposite. Next to it was a wooden box of toys large enough for an oversized leopard.
“Is this your bedroom?” I swung my legs off the side of the mattress, stood on a deep-pile rug, and stretched.
Instead of answering, Macavity bounded across the room to the door, which swung open to let in a trolley pulled by Mrs. Meg.
“It’s good to see you survived the night.” She stopped at a low table and set down a large plate of chopped meat.
The leopard advanced toward the faerie, shaking his head from side to side, and snarled. Macavity was nearly twice her size and looked like he could swallow her in a single bite.
Mrs. Meg turned to the leopard and placed her hands on her hips. “Now, see here, Mr. Macavity. You will not bully me into dragging a carcass into the living quarters.”
Macavity roared.
She pursed her lips and wagged her finger up at the snarling beast. “You know the rules. If you wish to eat as a full-sized hellcat, you go to the kennels with the Inferno hounds. Now, shrink down and eat your breakfast like a good hellcat, while I tend to the Lady Phoenix.”
With one last roar, Macavity transformed into a Bengal and ran around her feet.
I shook my head. “How do you get him to listen to you?”
“After having a hundred and twelve children of my own and nannying four times that amount, I know my way around a belligerent little mister. If you don’t set the rules from day one, they’ll take advantage.”
“So that’s where I went wrong?” I turned to the low table, where Macavity had already buried his head in a heaping pile of cut meat.
As the effects of the sleepy tea faded, memories from the day before drifted back into my consciousness. Valentine’s arrest, Kresnik’s televised return, the bizarre bargain I’d made with the Council of Ministers, rejecting Hades and then seeing him take pleasure in Nut and Geb coming to collect my organs.
I ran trembling fingers through my hair and exhaled a ragged breath. “What’s happened—”
“The terrible twins should be waking from their sleepy tea in the pocket dimension,” said Mrs. Meg. “We’ve left them with enough cattle to eviscerate.”
“Poor cattle,” I muttered under my breath. “Thanks for coming to my rescue.”
She picked up a tray, bustled toward a small dining table with it, and set it down. “I’m still under contract with His Majesty to keep you safe and fed.” She pulled back a chair and turned to me with a frown. “What are you still doing sitting on the floor? Breakfast is ready.”
I rose to my feet, rubbing at my temples with a frown. “There’s no time to eat. Valentine’s—”
“His Majesty is safe behind bars, and Kresnik’s too busy gathering his flock to come after anyone just yet.”
I padded toward the old faerie. She must have changed me last night while I was slumbering under the effects of her narcotic tea, because I wore a Mina Harcourt-style nightgown. It was long and white and frilly around the top, showing just enough neck to entice a lecherous vampire.
I shook off those thoughts, letting her words sink in. “How do you know about Kresnik?”
“It’s all over the papers.” She patted the back of the chair. “Turns out he was the ifrit who abducted you, and the Supernatural Council suppressed that information.”
“And they didn’t suppress the press?” I slipped into the seat, letting the mingled scents of cooked meat fill my nostrils.
Sitting in front of me was a full English breakfast with sausage and bacon and scrambled eggs. It was served with grilled mushrooms, tomatoes, and baked beans with a dollop of tomato ketchup on the side.
The old faerie patted me on the back. “Eat up, and I’ll fill you in on the news.”
While I cut into the sausage and bacon, Mrs. Meg poured me a generous serving of tea. “Kresnik’s appearance on human television has plunged both worlds into panic,” she said. “Humans are rallying around him to hunt down their demon enemies, and supernaturals are clogging the escape routes.”
“They’re running away?” I chewed on my mouthful.
She sighed. “Everyone knows someone who was affected by Kresnik’s last reign of terror. Even though he never reached Elphame, he still managed to hurt a good number of faeries living in this realm.”
“Maybe that’s why the Council wanted to keep news of his resurrection a secret,” I said around a mouthful of scrambled eggs.
“It’s terrible,” she said. “Enforcers are leaving their stations, as are ward masters. All modes of transport are already fully booked. At this rate, there’ll be nobody left to protect Logris.”
“Why don’t they all work together against him?” I asked.
“Humans have the sheer numbers to overwhelm us,” she replied. “What with their automatic weapons and long-distance methods of annihilation, supernaturals don’t stand a chance.”
“Why haven’t we developed a way to fight back?”
“And have other supernatural nations rise to the humans’ defense?” she asked. “Angels wouldn’t lash out against humans, and neither will those who rely on them for sustenance. It’s best for all to stay alive and out of their way.”
My stomach clenched with a touch of trepidation, but I continued my breakfast, trying to work out how we were going to stop Kresnik before he amassed a human army large enough to destroy Logris and every other supernatural enclave in Great Britain.
Mrs. Meg placed a glass of orange juice in front of me, and I took several long sips, letting the sweet liquid slide down my throat. As my energy levels returned to normal and I shook off the last vestiges of sleep, my mind drifted to Valentine, who was probably still sitting in that luxury cell, wondering what on earth had happened with Kain and me.
“Are you going to keep me confined in this room?” I asked.
“When His Majesty let you out of the pocket dimension, I assumed he’d changed his mind about keeping you.”
“Like a kept woman?” I asked.
“Most young women would kill to be the plaything of a rich and handsome monarch,” she said.
“I’m…” I shook my head and reached for a steaming cup of breakfast tea. What did it matter if people thought I was Valentine’s plaything? He was stuck behind bars. “Can I pay for faerie services with a credit card?”
Her eyes narrowed. “That depends on what kind.”
“I need a shapeshifter faerie to sit in Valentine’s cell while I sneak him out. Is that possible?”
Mrs. Meg stroked the hairs on her chin, her lips twisting with a look of concentration. “There’s an agency that takes credit, but they’re not cheap.”
I nodded. “And would they take the place of a prisoner?”
“The penalty for getting caught is death,” she said. “Do you really want to risk a faerie’s life to break out someone who’s going to be released in six days?”
My shoulders sagged, and I shook my head. “A lot can happen in a few days,” I murmured. “Valentine’s uncle is plotting to take his throne, and Kresnik’s recruiting humans to stand against us.”
Macavity leaped onto my lap and climbed up to the table, his paws reaching for the edges of my plate.
“No.” Mrs. Meg reached for the cat.
I raised a hand. “He stood guard over me while I slept, so he’s earned a little reward.”
“Meow.” Macavity nodded.
I picked up the sausage and held it to the cat’s mouth, watching him devour it in a few enthusiastic bites. Macavity’s happy purr reverberated against my stomach and chest, easing some of my tension. Now that Mrs. Meg had explained the consequences of involving a third party in breaking Valentine out of prison, I couldn’t move ahead with that plan.
“Alright then.” I picked up the bacon and waved it in front of Macavity, whose head swished from side to side. “Is there a glamor I can use to make me look and smell like Valentine?”
“Not one that can fool a supernatural’s nose, but you could take a corpusverto pill.”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“It’s a concentrated elixir that allows the drinker to steal a person’s physical form,” she said.
“How does it work?”
“You know the tale of the Clever Princess and the Frog?”
“Where a girl tries to escape a forced wedding by transforming into a frog?” I asked.
Aunt Arianna had told me the story a few times when I was little. The princess’s father somehow got swindled by an ogre into promising his daughter’s hand in marriage, and she swapped bodies with a frog just before the wedding. When the ogre married a frog in her body and they exchanged a kiss, the ogre turned into a frog and the frog turned into the ogre.