Despite the vow to make their last day fun, a cloud seemed to hang over their table as they ate in near silence.
“Do you think you’ll ever come back to Africa?” Addison asked as they walked back to their room.
“It’s funny you ask. I was thinking this afternoon about how I imagined this would be the trip of a lifetime for me. Now I feel like it’s just the beginning.”
“What else is on your list?”
“Lots of things. Maybe London.”
Addison grinned. “I would love to show you London.”
“It’ll take me at least a year to save up the money.”
“Unless you take me up on my offer of frequent flyer miles. Then you could come at Christmas.”
That actually sounded workable.
“And if you get this hiking bug again, there’s always Machu Picchu. We could tie that in to going down to visit my mom.”
Mary Kate chuckled at the invitation. “We can’t even agree on when to visit each other at home, and now you have me meeting your mother.”
Addison slid the key in their door. “I’m just throwing out ideas, hoping you’ll bite on something.”
“Lock the door, and I’ll give you something else to bite on.”
They quickly undressed and climbed into one of the beds, sealing the net behind them.
Mary Kate assumed the position that had grown so familiar in only a few days, on her back with Addison’s leg draped between hers. Solemn brown eyes seemed to pin her in place.
A warm hand began a gentle caress of her skin from thigh to breast and back again. “I want to memorize you.”
She closed her eyes and gave up her body to a near-torturous exploration that finally culminated in an intimate touch. Though wet and ready, she had learned to temper her need to make it last.
“You need this, Mary Kate,” Addison whispered as she stroked her deep inside. “It’s who you are.”
She lay awake long after they made love, studying Addison as she slept. Nothing in her whole life had felt as good to her as the love they shared. Now their time was slipping away. No matter how much either of them wanted it, a life together with Addison in London and her in Georgia seemed impossible, even if she somehow found the courage to try.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Addison sighed as she watched the passengers from Johannesburg make their way down the staircase and through the door marked Arrivals. Who would have guessed that flights into such an out of the way place would be on time? That meant Mary Kate would be leaving right on schedule, in less than an hour.
It was probably just as well. She had run out of things to say once they reached a point where everything made Mary Kate cry. Both of them had slept poorly after the tacit suggestion that the Sopa Lodge might be their last night as lovers. As she lay awake, she played out their parting in her mind’s eye, vowing to remain upbeat and hopeful, regardless of her sense of dread. As much as she hated to admit it, she understood Mary Kate’s doubts about trying to turn this chance meeting into a relationship. It was a lot to ask of someone who had discovered only days ago that she wasn’t the woman she had lived her whole life to be.
“I wonder how long it’ll be before we board,” Mary Kate said, grasping Addison’s hand beneath the jacket that spread across their laps.
“Are you ready?”
She shook her head. “No, I could sit here like this all day.”
Addison knew she didn’t mean it, but she appreciated the sentiment. Once they parted, the pressure about their future would be off. “What? You aren’t looking forward to spending the next twenty hours in a space smaller than a sleeping bag?”
Mary Kate chuckled. “As long as we don’t bounce around, I’ll survive.”
“You’ll be home this time tomorrow.”
“I know. I bet I sleep for three days.”
For conversation’s sake, she thought about asking if Bobby was picking her up at the airport, but Bobby was the last thing she wanted to hear about. “I’ll probably sleep all the way home.”
“I would too if I were flying first class like you.”
“Yeah, having Reginald Falk for a father comes with a few advantages. But I won’t get back to Miami until late tomorrow afternoon.” The way her life was going right this minute, she expected to find a Sold sign in the yard and a pile of rejection letters on the floor behind the mail slot.
Her stomach knotted as the operations crew gathered at the podium. It appeared their boarding announcement was only minutes away.
She touched her booted foot to Mary Kate’s as they both stared at the floor. “I miss you already.”
“You’re going to make me cry again.”
“We certainly don’t need any more of that.”
Obviously fighting tears, Mary Kate leaned close so that only Addison could hear. “I want you to know that I love you, and that this has been the most wonderful two weeks of my life. If I can find a way to do this, Addison, I will. But if I can’t…”
Addison felt her own tears welling and remembered her vow to leave things upbeat. “Don’t think about your family or Bobby or me. Just decide what’s best for you and be proud of yourself for taking charge. That’s the whole reason you came on this trip.”
Mary Kate wiped her cheeks and nodded grimly.
Addison shuddered as the boarding announcement came. “You have my phone number, right?” It was the third time she had asked.
“Yes.”
The line had shortened to only a few people, prompting the hostess to make a second call.
“You have to go.”
Mary Kate pulled her to her feet and they hugged each other tightly. “I miss you already too.”
Addison drew in a deep breath to stifle her tears. “I love you. Don’t forget.”
Mary Kate planted a quick kiss on her lips and whispered, “I love you too.” She looked over her shoulder and waved twice before exiting, and once more when she reached the top of the stairs.
Addison slumped back in her chair and watched as the door closed, the stairs were hauled away, and the plane rolled away from the window toward the end of the runway. Like Mary Kate, she was saying goodbye to the best two weeks she had ever spent. If she managed not to cry any more today, it would be a miracle.
“Addison!”
She turned to see Ann and Nikki coming through the security station. Nikki darted off to the restroom, while Ann came to take the seat Mary Kate had just vacated.
“You ready to go home?”
“Hardly,” Addison said. “I don’t even know where home is anymore.”
“Oh, that’s right. You’re moving to London.”
“Looks that way.” With thoughts of working for her father, her day just kept getting worse. “Off to be Reginald’s lackey.”
“Where’s Mary Kate?”
“You just missed her.” Though a part of her wanted to wallow in her misery, another part welcomed a distraction from the empty feeling of watching Mary Kate leave.
“Did you two have a good time?”
“Yeah, we did. How about you?”
“Mostly okay. Nikki got food poisoning on the second night, so she missed a day on safari. But we saw a lot.”
“Food poisoning,” she said, shaking her head. “You know, considering the odds, it’s kind of amazing more of us didn’t get sick.”
“Yeah, but who knows what parasites we’re carrying home? Three weeks from now we could all be hospitalized.”
“Oh, that reminds me. It’s Larium day.” Addison reached into her backpack for her pills and bottle of water. “I hope Mary Kate remembers hers.”
“When will you two get to see each other again?”
Addison was surprised by the question, since she thought they had been relatively discreet. Maybe someone had seen her coming from Mary Kate’s room after all. “We talked about a visit, but nothing for sure.”
“I got the idea it was working out pretty well,” she said, patting Addison’s hand.r />
Addison momentarily debated deflecting the remark, but her curiosity got the best of her. “How did you know?”
“Are you kidding? The sparks were flying off both of you that first day at breakfast.”
“No way.”
“Way,” she said, nodding emphatically.
“Jeez!” She covered her face with her hands. “Did everybody know?”
“I don’t think Brad did, but Nikki told him.”
“So much for privacy.”
“Look, you can’t spend eight days as close as we all were and not notice things like that. You two were always hanging back or running off together. That’s what people do when they fall in love.”
Addison could feel her face growing red.
“My oldest son was the same way with his”—she made quote marks in the air—“best friend. I knew they were in love with each other before they did.”
“Your son is gay?”
“Yep.”
Nikki joined them, but buried her nose in a paperback.
“I don’t know what’s going to happen, Ann. This is all new for Mary Kate, and her family might not be able to handle it. It isn’t exactly what they had planned.”
“Pffft. Hardly anybody gets what they plan. Besides, it’s not their life.”
“I know. I told her all those things, but she’s worried about disappointing them.”
“Jumping out of the nest is hard enough without having your parents hold on to you. But you’ll both have to do it eventually if you’re going to be your own person.” She pulled off her vest and dropped it on her seat. “Watch my stuff. I have to find a bush.”
Addison chuckled at her reference to the trail. She wished Ann had gotten here sooner so Mary Kate could have heard her talk about loving her gay son. And that leaving the nest part, if Mary Kate wanted to be her own person…
“…you’ll both have to do it.” That’s what Ann had said, that it wasn’t just Mary Kate. She too had to jump out of her father’s nest to be her own person.
Another plane came to rest on the tarmac where Mary Kate’s had been. This one was Kenya Airways, Addison’s flight to Nairobi. It was going to be a long, miserable trip, and there was nothing to look forward to at home.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Mary Kate closed her window shade to block the morning sun from her personal entertainment screen. She had been tracking their progress on the plane’s global positioning system for the past four hours as they approached the east coast of Georgia. She was cramped and cranky, and anxious about what the next few days would bring. One thing was certain, and that was that she couldn’t go back to the way things were. She had reached a decision—probably the most important one in her life—and would set it in motion the moment she stepped off the plane.
Her flight out of Kilimanjaro Airport had been the exclamation point on her trip. When they cleared the cloud cover, the majestic summit came into view once again, riveting her thoughts to the enormity of what she had accomplished. Just as when she first saw the peak below their plane, Mary Kate was awed. But this time, she was not intimidated. This time, she owned that mountain, and had proven to herself that no goal, no matter how difficult, was beyond her reach. She didn’t have to blindly follow Bobby’s dreams, or those of her family. She had stood up to them, and could do it again with confidence.
Ironically, she had given the trek to Uhuru barely a thought since exiting the park at Millennium Gate. It was peculiar that something which had been essential to her sense of self for the past six months had moved so quickly from her consciousness. In her two weeks in Africa, she had conquered the summit, yet it was not what she would remember most about her trip. That distinction belonged to Addison Falk.
She ached to think her first real glimpse of love was over, that the one thing she really wanted was something she couldn’t have. In the first place, women from Mooresville, Georgia, didn’t just up and run off to London, or anywhere else. Her newfound confidence was about asserting herself to be her own woman among her family and friends, not to be someone else entirely.
In the second place—the most important place—Addison would never be accepted by her family as the person she loved and wanted to build a life with. After the initial disappointment and shame, there would be an agreement by all to pretend things weren’t really as they were. Mary Kate would go to Sunday dinner less often, and always alone. Every visit would be a painful reminder that going against the grain in pursuit of her personal happiness had consequences.
Making a life with Addison was impossible without her family’s support. To do so, she needed a single-minded determination that being together was worth the cost. If she was wrong—if she and Addison were to fall apart down the road—she would never fully recover the trust of her family, or the respect of the community.
Addison loved her, and she would always cherish that. She, too, loved Addison, but there was nowhere for that love to go.
Addison had awakened her body, and had taught her things about herself that Bobby would never have known. More important, she had stirred the kind of passion that had always been missing in her life, where fascination and desire came together to yield perfect physical expression. Now that she understood her sexuality, she wanted control of it, and would teach Bobby to give her those sensations.
Bobby had other virtues, even if they were tied to a predictable life that felt suffocating at times. He would be principal when Warner Hughes retired, a job that would take him to retirement. Her family had welcomed him without reservation. Their life was perfectly scripted—a church wedding, three children. Bobby would be a good provider, a family man. Their children would play with Carol Lee’s, and their house would have an in ground pool. Like the generation before them, the women would sit in the kitchen and talk while the men watched football in the other room.
“Ladies and gentlemen, in preparation for landing, please bring seat backs and tray tables to their upright and locked positions. Putaway all…”
She tipped her seat forward and closed her video screen as the big plane lumbered through its descent. A loud vibration signaled the drop of the landing gear, and she willed herself a dose of courage for what she knew she had to do.
This was the crossroads of her life, and only one path would lead to happiness. She would marry Bobby, probably during the Christmas break so they could have a honeymoon.
Addison was right that she would feel proud of herself for working it through. She would never have to look back on her life with regrets about not trying something different. She had, and it wasn’t right for her. This was. She knew because every time she thought of choosing Addison, her anxiety became almost unbearable. Choosing Bobby quieted that.
Numb from her exhausting physical and emotional journeys, she mindlessly followed her fellow passengers through passport control and into the baggage claim area. Balancing her Summit bag and duffel, she walked through the exit marked Nothing to Declare and turned over her form to the customs agent. As she snaked through the hallway toward the arrivals area, she envisioned Bobby’s handsome face lighting up with recognition as she emerged. Would he be able to tell that she had been unfaithful?
“Mary Kate!”
She spun in the direction of his voice and immediately found herself enveloped in his strong arms. The kiss that followed surprised her, and she turned her head at the last second to receive it on the cheek.
“I’m so glad you’re home. I missed you so bad, I’m not ever going to let you out of my sight again.”
She bristled at the possessive inference before accepting it as his way of showing affection. She had intended to accept his proposal in a grand gesture the instant she got off the plane, but this didn’t feel like the time. “I’ve missed you too.”
Bobby picked up both bags. “I got here early and got a parking place right by the elevator so we wouldn’t have to walk far.” All business now, he proceeded toward the elevator. “Everybody’s going to be really glad to se
e you.”
“I’ll be glad to see them too.” It felt good to stretch her legs, but the long walk through the terminal had sapped her strength. When they finally reached the car, all she wanted was to collapse.
Bobby tossed the bags into the trunk while she got into the passenger seat.
“Was it as hard as you thought it would be?”
“Yeah, some parts were a lot tougher than I expected, but I was ready. There were three people in our group who didn’t train enough and they had to turn back.” That was her way of telling him he might not have made it. “But it was so incredible to be up on top of it all.”
“Well, that’s what you went for. Did you see lions and stuff?”
“We saw everything. I bet I saw twenty or thirty lions, just out in the wild. And a cheetah with two—”
“We had a little incident with wild animals too.” Bobby chuckled as he remembered the tale. “The State Patrol called out to the school on Wednesday morning and told Warner that his fence was down, and he had three bulls running up and down Wilson Mill Road. So me and him jumped in his truck and drove out there. You should have seen us, Mary Kate, waving our arms to get those bulls to go back into the pasture. It was a sight, I tell you.”
Stung by his interruption, she leaned back against the headrest and closed her eyes. It didn’t surprise her that, where Bobby was concerned, a mother cheetah and her cubs were nothing compared to bulls running loose on the highway. In fact, he was probably no more interested in her trip now than he was before she left.
He drove through the parking garage, winding down several levels until he got into the long line to pay. “I always manage to pick the line that moves the slowest,” he grumbled. They were gridlocked in the middle of the garage.
“So what did Mom and Dad say when you told them I made it to the top?” After sitting upright for so long, it felt good to lie back with her feet stretched out.
“You know, I’m not sure I told them about that part. All anybody cared about was you getting down off that mountain okay.” He fumbled in the glove compartment for his cell phone. “You ought to call and tell them your plane got here.”
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