by Sara Ney
Me: Because I’m being an asshole—WHY WOULDN’T YOU UNMATCH WITH ME?
RexG: Why are you yelling?
Me: Have some standards. All you have in your profile is that you’re looking for someone over the age of 18. WTH?
RexG: Age ain’t nothin’ but a numba.
Me: So…what are you actually doing here if you’re not a student? Are you a TA?
RexG: No, I’m helping out with the athletics. Mostly with the wrestling team, I used to be their manager.
Me: My roommate’s boyfriend is a wrestler. Maybe you know him?
RexG: What’s his name?
Me: Abe Davis.
RexG: He was a freshman I think the year I left the team; don’t know him that well. He decent?
Me: He’s awesome.
RexG: Cool.
Me: So you’re on campus for how long?
RexG: Rest of this semester, summer, first term of fall.
Me: And you’re looking to hook-up with someone?
RexG: Sure. If that’s what you want.
Me: It’s not.
RexG: Okay.
Me: That’s it? Okay? You’re not going to try and change my mind?
RexG: Do you want me to?
Me: Uh, NO.
RexG: LOL then I won’t.
Me: It’s really shitty that you’re just here looking to get laid. Some of us are looking for the real deal.
RexG: I never said all I wanted was an easy lay. You did.
Me: Well, COME ON. Let’s get real here. You won’t even be here the entire year.
RexG: Says you’re a junior. 22. You won’t be there long either.
Me: But I’m here NOW.
RexG: So am I.
Me: Is this an athlete thing? Are you all just douchebags who sleep around?
RexG: I don’t know, is that how Abe Davis acts?
Me: No.
RexG: Wanna throw some sweats on tomorrow and meet me for coffee?
Me: How early?
RexG: Whatever works for you.
Me: How tired do you want me to look?
RexG: How will you look at 9?
Me: Horrible.
RexG: LOL
Me: Why the hell are we even talking about this, I DON’T WANT TO MEET YOU.
RexG: That’s fine.
Me: Stop doing that.
RexG: What am I doing, I’m agreeing with you.
Me: I REFUSE to fall for your jedi-mind tricks.
RexG: Listen, I don’t know what I did or what I said, but you’re kind of scary.
Me: WHY DOES EVERY GUY KEEP SAYING THAT?
RexG: Because you yell a lot. Guys don’t like that.
RexG: And you keep putting words in my mouth, and making assumptions.
Me: Thanks, I got it.
RexG: And that part in your profile about “no shave November” and always being hangry? Also scary and confusing.
Me: I am who I am.
RexG: Hairy, hungry, and scary?
Me: Yes?
RexG: I don’t know what to tell you, Bianca.
Me: Um, about that...Bianca isn’t my name.
RexG: Okayyyyy… What is it then?
Me: Hannah
RexG: That’s pretty, why did you use a different name? Didn’t want any creepers messaging you?
Me: I just like the name. It sounds sexy.
RexG: Little liar, aren’t you.
Me: NO! Just about that one thing…The rest is all me. I’m just—I can’t help it if I’m awkward, and I say stupid shit, and I make inappropriate comments at inappropriate times.
RexG: You know—I could help you with that.
Me: Help me with what?
RexG: Help you date. While I’m here. I can teach you some shit, like how to talk to dudes and shit.
Me: This isn’t a trick to try and sleep with me?
RexG: Nope. Twenty-six chicks have swiped on me in the time we’ve been talking. I’ll be fine.
RexG: Do you want my help or not?
RexG: Hello? You still there?
Me: I’m thinking…
RexG: Don’t think too long, I might change my mind.
Me: Fine.
RexG: Great.
Me: Okay.
RexG: LOL here’s my number. Message me when you get the courage.
It takes me two days.
The Teaching Hours
a HOW TO DATE A DOUCHEBAG novella.
August, 2019
OTHER TITLES BY SARA NEY
The Kiss and Make Up Series
Kissing in Cars
He Kissed Me First
A Kiss Like This
#ThreeLittleLies Series
Things Liars Say
Things Liars Hide
Things Liars Fake
How to Date a Douchebag Series
The Studying Hours
The Failing Hours
The Learning Hours
The Coaching Hours
The Lying Hours
Jock Hard Series
Switch Hitter
Jock Row
For a complete updated list visit: https://authorsaraney.com/books/
ABOUT SARA NEY
Sara Ney is the USA Today Bestselling Author of the How to Date a Douchebag series, and is best known for her sexy, laugh-out-loud New Adult romances. Among her favorite vices, she includes: iced latte’s, historical architecture and well-placed sarcasm. She lives colorfully, collects vintage books, art, loves flea markets, and fancies herself British.
For more information about Sara Ney and her books, visit:
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