Lilyanna's brows raised with surprise as she continued to listen.
"I have a terrible habit, you see," Hazel continued, looking down at the floor as she finally relaxed, "of listening through doors. I have done so since I was a child, and I am afraid I have yet to conquer the habit. At any rate, I must admit how glad I am to have overheard your apology to my mother."
Lilyanna blushed. "I am only glad your mother allowed me to express my regret."
"You have quite impressed me, as well as, I daresay, my parents. I do hope your mother will soon change her mind so that we may see more of each other."
"For how long were you perched on the other side of that door, Mrs. Godfrey?" Lilyanna asked with a laugh.
"I am sorry," Hazel said with a guilty smile. "I told you it was a terrible habit. I left as soon as I heard you stand, running upstairs to avoid being caught, but I decided then I could not let you leave without speaking to you first."
"Well, I am glad you did."
"As am I."
Lilyanna watched as Hazel hesitated again. "Miss Crosgrove," she began, wringing her hands, "I would like to apologize for something else I have done. I am afraid I was not receptive of you when we first met. Elijah has been hurt by unkind people, and I was simply being protective of him."
Thinking of their first meeting and all the scrupulous stares sent her way, Lilyanna nodded.
"When Mother spoke of Mrs. Crosgrove's actions last evening, I believed my suspicions to be confirmed, thinking you shared the same disposition as your mother. However, I have come to regret my hasty opinion, as I see now how kind you truly are."
"Thank you for thinking of me as such, Mrs. Godfrey," Lilyanna said, humbled yet again with the Bainbridge family. "I only hope I can make it up to you and your family for such unkindness."
Hazel shook her head. "You have already done so much by coming directly to Mother. So many people are cruel toward her, yet you are the first to have apologized."
Lilyanna felt ashamed again for having taken part in such heartlessness, but she pushed it aside, trying to believe Hazel's words. "Thank you, Mrs. Godfrey. I do wish I could stay longer, but I am afraid I must be on my way."
"Of course," Hazel said, moving to walk alongside Lilyanna. "I apologize for taking your time."
"Not at all," Lilyanna said.
She paused when she reached the door, her hand resting on the handle. "I have already spoken my wish with your parents," she said, "but may I ask you to please inform your brother of my desire to speak with him?"
"Certainly, Miss Crosgrove," Hazel said. "Only I…"
"What is it?" Lilyanna asked.
"I feel I should warn you," Hazel continued, her brown eyes filled with concern. "Elijah is even more protective of his family than myself, and last night, he, well, he seemed out of sorts."
Lilyanna's heart squeezed with pain. "I expected such a reaction," she said. "I saw the anger and hurt in his eyes after he overheard the words spoken to Mrs. Bainbridge."
Hazel nodded. "But please, Miss Crosgrove, though he may be angry now, do not give up on him. He is as kind a gentleman as any. And the way you simply denied the rumors surrounding his name was noble, indeed. Not many women could do so. I find it difficult he should forget that or your true nature."
"I only hope he will be so gracious as all you have been toward me."
"I am sure he will be," Hazel nodded, smiling.
They said their goodbyes, and Lilyanna made her way down the front steps, walking slowly along the path of the crescent-shaped building deep in thought.
She prayed she would be able to speak with Elijah soon, having had the opportunity to apologize to his mother first, yet, when she saw the very man walking in her direction, his gaze looking straight past her, her heart lurched forth in her chest.
She frantically searched for words, caught unaware at seeing him so suddenly, but her scrambling proved in vain, for when they reached each other, the man simply walked past her without so much as a glance.
Turning around, Lilyanna called after him. "Mr. Bainbridge? Mr. Bainbridge, please. Please, wait."
She felt some sort of relief when he paused, though his back was still turned.
Taking a deep breath, she said, "If you would not mind, I would like to speak with you. I have something I need to say."
Elijah looked over his shoulder, a deep scowl Lilyanna had never before seen on his brow. "You have said all you could to my mother last evening, Miss Crosgrove. I will hear no more. Good day."
She watched, tears welling in her eyes, as Elijah walked the rest of the way to the Godfrey's house, climbing the stairs and closing the door firmly behind him.
She thought of how foolish she had been to think he would so easily forgive her. She did not blame him, for she found it difficult to even forgive herself.
Turning on her heel, Lilyanna made her way down the road, no longer bothering to quell the aching in her heart.
Elijah walked across the entryway, his boots stomping angrily across the floor until his mother's voice stopped him.
"Elijah, is that you?" she called from within the parlor.
"Yes," he said simply, remaining where he stood.
"Will you come here for a moment, please?"
Elijah scowled, not wanting to hear his family inform him of Lilyanna's search for him.
He had spent most of the previous night awake, deciding to go on a walk in the early morning hours to clear his mind, but after nearly two hours of walking, he had felt little better. When he had finally decided to return home, therefore happening upon Lilyanna, his frustration with being betrayed had increased tenfold, even when he had seen her beautiful, tear-stained face.
Tear-stained, he thought, pausing as he accepted what he had seen.
He attempted to push aside the guilt riddling his mind as he thought of her red eyes and splotchy cheeks.
"Are you coming, Elijah?" Mrs. Bainbridge called again.
"Yes, Mother," he said, walking begrudgingly to the parlor, all the while attempting to convince himself of Lilyanna deserving her tears.
He entered the room where he saw his mother, father, and sister sitting. "Good morning," he said flatly.
"Elijah," Mrs. Bainbridge said, "your walk must have left you famished. Do come and enjoy something to eat while we tell you all about our visitor who has only left moments ago."
"No, thank you, Mother," Elijah said, curious to note her smile had returned. "I have some urgent business to take care of."
"So urgent you could set it aside for a two-hour walk this morning?" Hazel piped in. "Surely not."
Elijah bit back a retort as he scowled at his sister.
"At any rate, wait a moment, Elijah," Mrs. Bainbridge said, "for you must want to hear of who has come calling."
"I know Miss Crosgrove called for me, Mother" he said, staring out the window and looking at nothing in particular.
"No, no, no, she did not call upon you," Mrs. Bainbridge said, a smile upon her lips, "she came to speak with me."
As Elijah's brows raised in surprise, Hazel said, "You see, Father? It is as I said. Your son has so much pride he is shocked a woman could come calling for anyone but himself."
He scowled again at Hazel's teasing grin, walking near his mother to where a tray filled with pastries was positioned.
"And what did Miss Crosgrove have to say for herself?" he asked as he shoved a small cake in his mouth, nearly swallowing it in a single gulp. "Did she take responsibility for her actions, or did she merely come to finish what her mother began at the assembly? Who did she criticize this time? Father, was it? Or Hazel? She is an easy target."
He grabbed another cake, looking to see each member of his family staring at him in shock.
"Why, Elijah," Mrs. Bainbridge said, "what on earth has come over you to say such a thing?"
He looked down at the cake in his hands before dropping it back on the tray, his stomach's churning causing him to lose his appetite.
Pride flared in his heart at Hazel's comment. "And what would you know about it, Hazel?"
"Elijah," came Mr. Bainbridge's warning tone, and Elijah looked over to see his father looking at him with a stern gaze.
Elijah suddenly felt like a child again. "I am sorry," he said slowly, "but we all know Lilyanna's true character now."
"We certainly do," Mr. Bainbridge said, "but you, however, do not."
Elijah looked to his father. "What do you mean?"
"Miss Crosgrove came to apologize directly to your mother for her behavior."
"You mean she blamed her own behavior on—"
His father's raised hand caused him to pause. "Quite the contrary, son," he continued. "She, in fact, took full responsibility for both her and her mother's actions and expressed her utmost regret and apologies."
"Yes," Mrs. Bainbridge said, "but she did not stay for long, for she came without the approval of her mother, so determined she had been to make the apology."
Elijah remained still and silent, an unchanging scowl upon his face.
Mrs. Bainbridge added, "She also wished for us to inform you of her desire to speak with you, but she could not be certain where or how soon, for her mother had forbidden it, as well."
Looking to the floor, Elijah tried to regain some of the justification he had come up with previously in his resentment of Lilyanna, but only guilt entered his mind.
"Her character, Elijah," Mr. Bainbridge said, "is filled with the same kindness we have all known her to have from the very beginning."
All eyes focused on Elijah as he scrambled to reclaim his pride. "Well, she may have apologized to you, but what about the rest of us? What about me?"
"Oh, Elijah, really," Mrs. Bainbridge said sharply.
He looked up, surprised to see a rare frown upon his mother's face. He knew his words had sounded childish, especially when he thought of Lilyanna's attempt to speak with him earlier, but nothing could stop his bitterness.
"Why ever should Miss Crosgrove apologize to you?" she continued. "She hardly needed to say sorry to me!"
"Surely you jest, Mother," he said. "She has offended you in the highest degree."
"No, she has not," she said. "Mrs. Crosgrove was the one who spoke unkindly, not her daughter."
"Then Miss Crosgrove, had she been as good a person as you say she is, should have been there to speak in your defense."
"Perhaps that is true," Mr. Bainbridge added calmly, "but we do not understand what pressure she was under to do as her mother advised."
Elijah looked away, careful not to reveal what he already knew of the way Mrs. Crosgrove treated her daughter. Still, his pride would not let him accept defeat.
"It does not matter," he continued, as he walked to the room's large window. "Miss Crosgrove has misled me in every way, exactly as Miss Billings had done. Again, I have been made the fool."
"Miss Crosgrove has partaken in no such deception, Elijah," Hazel said, her own sharp tone surprising him as much as his mother's had. "No matter what your wounded mind creates, you know she will never have so deceitful a mind as Miss Billings's."
As Elijah looked out the window, he knew Hazel spoke truthfully. From the moment he had first seen Lilyanna, he knew she differed greatly from any woman he had known before. Her kind, blue eyes and ready smile had instantly revealed as much. Still, fear told him to keep his wounded soul strong in order to protect himself.
"And this is coming from you who has warned me to stay away from Miss Crosgrove," he said, scoffing.
Hazel raised her chin. "I do not deny my wariness toward Miss Crosgrove in the beginning, as I have mentioned to her already, but I would never be so daft as to not admit I have been utterly wrong in my initial impression of her. You know as well as I how amiable she is, if only by witnessing her actions. You would do well to remember, brother, how she acted when first hearing the rumors surrounding your name."
Elijah felt a twinge of humility as he thought of how Lilyanna had come directly to him before ever sending a condemning thought his way.
"You may have seen her remain silent at the ball last night, Elijah," she said, "but you should allow Miss Crosgrove the same courtesy she has shown you. Give her the chance to speak with you. Listen to what she has to say."
Silence ensued amongst their group as Elijah's mind raced, a small dash of hope budding within his chest.
"You have heard our opinions, Elijah," Mrs. Bainbridge said as she made her way to him, putting a hand on his arm, "and now you must make your choice on what to do with the information you have received."
After a few moments of silence, Elijah said quietly, "If you will excuse me."
With a nod of his head, he left the room, his mind filled with so many conflicting thoughts he did not notice the hopeful glances shared between each member of his family.
Chapter Thirteen
After her encounter with Elijah, Lilyanna did not go home, instead letting her feet take her through the busy, city streets until they found their way to vacant, green fields.
The thought of returning home to face her mother caused her great distress, so she headed the opposite direction of Heatherhill, toward Solsbury Hill, longing to put off her inevitable future as long as possible as she knew it held no sign of Elijah Bainbridge.
Thunder rumbled overhead, and she looked up to see clouds once again gathering above her. The rain had come and gone repeatedly since she had left the Godfrey's home, her gown and shawl having already been soaked through, so the sign of more rain did nothing to hinder her progress across the dark green countryside.
As her mind continued to mull over the regret she felt for her actions, she suddenly lost her footing, slipping on the slick grass until she landed on her backside.
The pain began to throb throughout her body seconds after the initial shock of falling wore off, but instead of standing up, she remained where she sat, pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs. She cried bitterly into the folds of her gown, all the while wishing she could change the past and future, if only to be with Elijah again.
She thought of his handsome, smiling face, his compassion and understanding, his ability to listen to her whenever she needed to be heard, and her heart swelled with agony and love.
Removing her bonnet and lifting her face up to the sky, she let the soft splatter of raindrops run down her cheeks, no longer denying her true feelings. She loved Elijah, and the thought of being parted from him forever, the thought of him not returning her love, caused an ache she had never known to pierce her heart.
After a few moments, she breathed in the cool air the storm had brought in, managing to calm her sobs until they disappeared altogether. The peaceful rain falling to the grass around was the only noise she heard until the sudden beating of horse hooves somewhere in the distance caught her attention.
She stood, embarrassed at having been caught in such a state, and prayed the horse and rider would continue past without noticing her.
She turned toward the approaching sound and gasped, a bolt of shock running through her limbs as she saw the tall, broad-figured man riding his large, black stallion commandingly in her direction.
Her stomach churned with fear and anxiety as she watched Elijah draw closer and closer, his black jacket flapping in the wind, his top hat placed securely upon his head, and his horse's coat glistening with moisture.
She wiped away her spare tears and smoothed down her wet, soiled gown that clung to her calves. Securing a few stray pins in her hair, she hoped the strands were not too sodden from her exposure to the weather.
Her appearance left her mind not long after as she wondered how Elijah had found her so far off the path.
Within a few more moments, Elijah reined in his horse, stopping a few lengths away from Lilyanna and dismounting, the reins remaining in his hand. She noted his dark, disheveled hair when he took off his hat, and
she averted her gaze when she noticed his untied cravat and the top buttons of his shirt open to reveal his neck and the smallest portion of his chest.
"Mr. Bainbridge," she finally said only after ensuring herself no emotion would be heard in her voice, "whatever are you doing out here?"
"I could ask you the same question, Miss Crosgrove," Elijah replied, his voice raspy.
"Well, I…" Lilyanna hesitated, playing with the ribbons of the bonnet she held in her hands, "I suppose I needed some time to think."
"So you chose to walk unaccompanied and so far off the trail there would be no chance of any society coming upon you? And you have been in the rain all day long, no doubt, from the look of your gown. You can practically see straight through to—"
Grateful she had her dark shawl around her shoulders to maintain some shred of decency, Lilyanna watched closely as Elijah abruptly stopped and looked away, a scowl still upon his face.
She wondered why her walking on her own annoyed him so, but she responded simply, saying, "Yes, Mr. Bainbridge."
"Why ever would you do such a thing?" he growled, looking back at her.
Her blue eyes, wide and innocent, stared at his untidy demeanor. "I simply did not know where else to go after our encounter."
Elijah's scowl slowly disappeared. "I am sorry, Miss Crosgrove," he said as he moved to place his hat atop his horse's saddle. "I only meant…I am only concerned for your well-being. You should not be out here on your own."
Lilyanna knew his words to be true, but before she could agree with him, the questions she wanted answered swarmed in her mind.
"May I ask what you are doing out here so far away from society?" she questioned.
He looked to the ground. "I needed some time to think, as well, so I set upon Solsbury Hill. I did not want to be where people might stop me from having time to myself."
She swallowed hard and took a step back. "I am sorry to have interrupted your thoughts then, Mr. Bainbridge. I will go at once and leave you be."
"No, please," he said instantly, and Lilyanna turned back to face him, surprised with his insistence.
When Two Rivers Meet (Regency Romance) Page 18