by Jen McIntosh
‘But the children—’
He cut her off. Gently, for once. Especially as he spotted her hand lingering on her stomach. Shame churned in his gut. He’d always been cunning – one didn’t survive long on the streets without a shrewd and devious mind – and a century serving the Shade King had honed his scheming to new heights. He hated it, but it was a necessary evil. Théon would never leave with him if he did not cleave her from Illyandi, and that wouldn’t happen on its own.
‘Not everyone has your kind heart, Princess. Mari and Ana will expect payment for their services, and it will not be cheap. As sad as it is, those people are stuck there until they can find the money to pay for passage.’
She hesitated. ‘What if I paid for their passage?’
‘And where would you find that kind of money?’
She reached inside the pocket of her dress and pulled out a necklace. A chain of gold, finer than gossamer silk, with a huge, leaf-shaped emerald set in golden vines. It was Elvish work. Caster-wrought. Some of the finest he’d ever seen.
It was also a priceless family heirloom.
She seemed to understand his hesitation. ‘It’s just a necklace. A trinket in exchange for dozens of innocent lives? I remember little about my mother, but I think she’d consider that a fair trade. Don’t you?’
He nodded. Of course she would. The first time he’d laid eyes on her, she’d been buying food for some beggar with a pair of her mother’s earrings. He’d assumed she’d stolen them. She hadn’t looked that dissimilar to him. Just another wide-eyed, hungry child. Another unwanted street urchin. She’d stolen his heart too before he’d found out the truth. Before he realised just how unattainable she was. But even as a girl, she’d valued life over any treasure. Guilt was a noose around his neck.
‘Does Théon know?’
‘Of course.’
‘And she supports this?’
‘Yes.’
He held out his hand. Shoved down the rising bile of self-loathing.
‘I’ll see what I can do.’
As expected, Mari and Ana seemed far more amenable to Illyandi’s proposal when he held the necklace up for them to see. Caster-wrought work of any kind, from broadswords to bracelets, had always fetched a good price, and now that it was a finite commodity, its worth had increased exponentially.
The ignorance of mortals had not improved over the last century. It was still easy to convince them that, should they renege on a bargain, he would not only learn of it but punish them, no matter how far they ran. The legends surrounding the Graced had only grown more ridiculous in their absence, so he could be confident Ana and Mari would stay true to their word.
Any expectation of gratitude he might receive from Illyandi was short-lived as she, Silvermane and Théon joined him on deck. The Princess hovered at her sister’s shoulder, shooting him looks of pure venom whenever he moved. Needlessly, of course – Théon was fine. Tired and a little pale, but otherwise unharmed. Just exasperated by Illyandi’s fussing, as far as he could tell. And though the look she gave him was less than pleasant, it wasn’t the pure loathing he’d expected. It did, however, promise that they would discuss all that had transpired later.
At length.
He was glad of their ire. It soothed the brittle edge of self-hatred for the seeds of strife he had sown.
They sailed most of the way up the narrow sea loch and dropped anchor close to land. They could disembark onto a craggy islet, but it would be a cold and wet journey across a half-submerged path of rock and reef to get onto the beach. The horses would not be happy. At least the shore was shingle and not the soft, golden sand he’d seen further up the coast. The cart would have never made it otherwise.
‘Do you know where you’re going from here?’ Ana asked as they readied to leave.
Alexan glanced over the hillside. ‘We’ll figure it out.’
Mari tutted in exasperation and held out an oiled map roll. ‘Here. This should keep you right.’
‘Thank you.’
She just nodded absently, watching Théon help the old man up into the wagon. Her gaze flickered to Illyandi, and she winked, grinning. ‘I’ll miss seeing your pretty face about the deck, sweetheart. If you’re ever feeling lonely, come find me.’
And with that she turned on her heel and sauntered back towards the stern, swearing at any sailor unfortunate to get in her way. Illyandi blushed and scarpered up into the wagon alongside Silvermane. Perhaps she was not so ignorant as he’d thought.
Beside him, Ana chuckled. ‘She’s a skittish one right enough. I hope, whoever he is, he treats her well. Does right by her.’ Alexan said nothing, praying his face did not betray him. She was observant, he’d give her that much. Turning, she smiled and extended her hand. ‘Forged in war.’
‘Tempered in blood.’ The customary response to the old Graced saying spilled from his lips before he could even register she’d said it. He took the offered hand and opened his mouth to question where she’d heard it. But she placed a finger on his lips and shook her head. Then, with an enigmatic smile, she turned to join her friend on the aft deck.
He was still mulling the exchange over in his mind, vaguely aware of the transition from the undulating grasses lining the beach to heather-coated moorland and barren rock, when Illyandi called an abrupt halt.
Just as he’d planned.
‘We need to talk,’ she announced, glaring at Alexan. Then she turned to her sister. ‘Théon, this has gone far enough. He can’t come with us. This place is a sanctuary, a haven from monsters like him. We were created to defend life from those who would try to steal it, not hand it to them on a silver platter.’
Théon blinked. ‘You’re the one who said he deserved a chance to earn our trust.’
‘And we gave him that chance. He spat on it the moment he decided to feed from you.’
‘Illyandi—’ Théon began.
But Illyandi cut her off. ‘No. I’ve had enough lies. The Shade King doesn’t just lose control of his Darkling general. He’s not here by accident. And I don’t know if it’s us he wants, or something else, but there are people on these islands relying on us to keep them safe. It is our duty to protect them, and the Darkling cannot be trusted. Nor can we allow him to live, not with the secrets he’s gleaned.’
Echoing silence followed.
Théon shifted uncomfortably. Unable or unwilling to admit the truth of their discussion.
Time to cleave that crack wide open.
‘You’re one to talk about lies and secrets, Princess,’ he murmured, a pointed look at her belly.
Her lovely face paled, hand flying to her stomach. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’
The old man’s gasp of horror was lost amongst the stream of curses that spewed from Théon’s mouth. Alexan resisted the urge to smirk. Easy. Too easy. He need do nothing more now. Instead, he just folded his arms and watched.
‘Tell me he’s wrong,’ Théon insisted, forcing her sister round to face her.
Illyandi blushed but, credit to her, raised her chin and looked her sister full in the face. ‘He’s not wrong. I’m with child.’
‘And the father?’
‘Faolin.’
An aura sparked to life around Théon. ‘I’ll kill him.’
‘He didn’t force me,’ Illyandi clarified. ‘I love him, Théon. I lay with him willingly.’
Alexan snorted. ‘That’s an understatement.’
‘You knew?’ demanded Théon, rounding on him.
He shrugged. Prodded the fracture a little further. ‘I was unfortunate enough to stumble across them in the act, so to speak. I didn’t know for sure she was pregnant until just now, though I’ve suspected for a while. I assumed she would tell you.’
Théon swore. Violently. Whirled back to her sister, aura crackling as she said, ‘What were you thinking? And don’t tell me it was an accident because you know fine well how to use a Casting to prevent it. How could you be so stupid? The Shade Court rules, and we�
��re hunted wherever we go, and you think it’s a good idea to bring a child into this world?’
Illyandi was crying now, tears streaming down her lovely face. Alexan had no sympathy for her. Even if he hated himself for what he was doing.
‘I love him,’ she sobbed, ‘and he loves me. We belong together. If he won’t stay for me, then at least he will stay for his child.’
Even the old man swore at that. ‘Foolish girl. A child will make him even less able to stay. He stays away to protect you. He will sacrifice far more to protect his heir. You may need to sacrifice far more.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘He means your child will be far safer away from you,’ Théon snapped. ‘Away from all of us. And even then, there’s no guarantee. You and Faolin hail from the most powerful Graced bloodlines in the world, and you’ve been hunted your whole lives because of it. How badly do you think the Shade will want your child when they learn of it? And, believe me, they will learn of it. A power like that does not go unnoticed. Gods, you fucking idiot!’
‘That’s enough,’ the old man murmured, putting an arm around the sobbing Princess, who buried her face in his shoulder. ‘We should discuss this later, when tempers have cooled.’
Théon’s lip curled in a silent snarl. ‘We could be waiting a while.’
‘Then so be it. But we should get moving – we should be able to cover a few miles at least before it gets dark.’
Illyandi looked up, eyes puffy and wide. ‘What about the Darkling? Just because I was keeping something from you, doesn’t mean he can be trusted. He’s a monster – I don’t want him around my baby!’
A terrible growl rippled up from Théon’s chest, and she placed herself between her sister and Alexan. His heart stuttered with triumph at the sudden display of loyalty, followed quickly by the queasy churning of shame in his gut. He didn’t deserve her. Not when he had shattered her world.
‘I don’t give a shit what you want,’ she snarled. ‘He’s not perfect, but at least he’s honest about what he is. With me and with himself. Which is more than I can say for you.’
And with that she wheeled her mount around and motioned for him to join her as she led the way across the purple moor.
Chapter Thirty-One
The wind was relentless. Not always a forceful battering, but still a never-ending draught that left his face and hands numb. It wasn’t surprising either, not when there was nothing between them and the raging ocean but open moor and barren hillside. The tallest tree he’d seen had been shorter than he was. Nothing bigger than a large bush would survive in these conditions, even with the long daylight hours through the summer. And winter … he shuddered to imagine how savage that would be.
He was trying hard not to notice how pretty Théon looked with her cheeks stained pink by the constant breeze. Or the tendrils of damp, raven hair pulled loose from her braid, coiling against her sea-kissed skin. Or the feral smile that touched her lips whenever she thought no one was looking. Despite what he’d told the old man, she was her father’s daughter. The wind and the wild were in her blood. Singing her home.
‘Where are we going?’ he asked, shoving down the feelings that rose in response.
‘There’s a Graced commune on one of the outlying islands. It’s heavily warded, so Illyandi should be safe there.’
He noted the emphasis of her words. ‘And what about you?’
‘If she decides to keep the child, I can’t be near them. Too much power in one place just draws unwanted attention.’
‘And Silvermane?’
She let out a bark of caustic laughter. ‘His magic is all but spent. Powerful, yes, but tired and weary. My father wouldn’t consider him a threat, even if he knew he was alive, which he doesn’t.’ He took a mental note of the information but said nothing as she blew out a breath and continued. ‘I just hope someone there can get word to Faolin, and that he’s not too far away. He’s the only one who can talk some sense into her.’
He didn’t need to ask – she meant the only one who stood any chance of convincing her to end the life growing in her womb. Most women had to rely on herbs for such a thing, and all the risks that came with them. But not the Elves. Not with the Casting power at their command. A single thought, a flutter of magic, and the problem would be resolved.
‘If she won’t even kill to defend herself, I doubt she’ll be keen for that,’ he pointed out.
Théon grimaced. ‘I know. Gods, what was she thinking? A child is a burden at the best of times and now is hardly that.’
‘Not a view I imagine she shares.’
‘No,’ she agreed. ‘She’s been desperate for a child for years. I’ve never understood it.’
He arched a brow, glancing at her sidelong. ‘Really?’
‘Do I look like mother material to you?’ she asked with a sardonic smile. The image of Théon, belly swollen with his child, flashed through his mind. He couldn’t deny it was an appealing thought – though dangerous enough to get him killed. Get them both killed.
He hedged his bets. ‘I reckon you’d do a better job than you think.’
She snorted and shook her head in disgust. ‘Hard to be a mother when you’ve never had one. Closest thing I had growing up was Jenia, at least until I was dragged back to Illyol. And my mother was a stranger to me for most of the time I knew her. I hated her for at least half of it. Besides, I swore a long time ago that my father’s line would end with me, and I have no intention of ever reconsidering that vow.’
They rode in silence for a while, her words echoing in his head. He didn’t blame her. Didn’t disagree with her choice either. It wasn’t an uncommon one in the Shade Court. Shade childbirth was unpredictable, the magic unstable and often deadly. Most Shade women didn’t want to risk it, and he’d known enough Graced women over the years who felt the same. As Théon had said, a child was a burden. One that many were not suited to carry, especially those with magic in their blood. For so many, that power was burden enough. Still, it made him sad to think Diathor’s line might end with her. Not that his opinion mattered; it was her body.
‘We should make camp soon,’ she said, glancing up at the darkening sky. ‘Then you and I need to have a chat.’
The slight depression in which they made their camp was the best shelter they could find from the incessant wind. Neither the shrubby heather nor gorse provided enough protection for a fire. And since no one was prepared to use a Casting, their meal was cold. Once the Princess and the old man were settled, huddled together in the relative shelter of the wagon beneath as many blankets as they could find, Alexan rose.
‘I’m going to scout ahead. Check there isn’t anyone too close who might stumble on us.’
Théon stood too. ‘I’ll come with you. I want to check the road ahead for tomorrow.’
Her tone brooked no discussion, and Silvermane had the sense to respect it. The Princess, however …
‘You’re just going to leave us here unprotected?’
Théon didn’t even turn. ‘You have magic. Protect yourself for once.’
They walked far enough that they wouldn’t be disturbed, but not too far that they wouldn’t hear any commotion if there was an attack. Not that Théon seemed inclined to save her sister if there was.
He perched on a rock and readied himself. ‘Come on then, let’s get this over with.’
Her expression was grim as she turned to face him, but it was not as enraged as he might have expected. She seemed more irked than incensed, and he found her irritation … arousing. She was frowning at him as she came nearer, and he waited for her reprimand. But when she spoke, her voice was surprisingly calm.
‘You took more from me than you needed,’ she said.
‘Darkling,’ he reminded her. ‘I told you never to trust one.’
‘You were in complete control. I think you took that much to teach me a lesson.’
‘Why would I do something like that?’
She shook her head in exasperation. �
��I honestly don’t know,’ she sighed. ‘You do the good-turned-evil act very well, but I don’t believe it for a second. You’re a good man, Alexan. I don’t know why you pretend otherwise.’
‘You don’t know me, Théon,’ he warned. ‘You don’t know what kind of man I am.’
‘I know you’re the kind of man who tried to scare me to protect me, even though that meant damaging your standing with me,’ she said.
‘What makes you think I care about my standing with you?’
‘Because you care about me,’ she said with a smirk. As he opened his mouth to respond she held up a hand to silence him. ‘Don’t bother denying it. I can see it written all over your face.’
He grinned then. Gods, the way she sassed him. ‘I wasn’t going to deny it.’
‘What then?’ she snapped. But her eyes were twinkling with mischief.
He sighed and leaned back against the rock, folding his hands behind his head. ‘What do you want, Théon?’
‘I want you to know why you did it,’ she said, folding her arms across her chest.
‘What makes you think I didn’t just like the taste?’ he asked with a cheeky smirk.
She grinned, his tone infectious. ‘Oh, I know you liked the taste,’ she said, ‘but you drained me to within an inch of my life, and I want to know why.’
‘Leave the dramatics to Illyandi, Théon – they don’t suit you,’ he said, rolling his eyes. ‘I didn’t drain you to within an inch of your life.’
She kicked him in the shin, hard. ‘Answer the damn question,’ she ordered.
He threw his hands up in defeat.
‘You were right. I did it to scare you. Offering yourself to me like that last night, when I was half-mad with bloodlust for you already, was a damn foolish thing to do. It’s like you’re daring me to kill you,’ he snapped. ‘You were stupid, and you needed to learn a lesson.’
‘Alright,’ she agreed. She knelt before him, and pulled her hair to one side, baring her throat to him. ‘Teach me a lesson.’
Alexan gawked at her. ‘What?’ he asked in a strangled voice. She was gazing wickedly at him from beneath her long, dark lashes, and it made his head spin.