by LJ Swallow
We choose to set up a small camp in a clearing hidden as far as we could within the woods without the trees encroaching on us. Animal howls close by worry me, but this way there’s space between us and the woods. We can see if anyone or anything approaches. One of us needs to stay on watch. We take a calculated risk—the Ebon may not want to meet these beasts either. We deal with the animals instead.
I watch Calla who stares into the campfire flames, and my heart can't accept this girl has any evil intent. Yes, I saw her tricked into performing her magic by the Relinquished, but despite the shadow around her, she wasn't completely out of control. Can we harness this and control her?
Calla's arms are wrapped around her knees as she remains lost in her own world; Galen and Rohan sit either side of her, close enough that their bodies touch her too, but she's oblivious. Rohan pokes at the fire with a stick, brow tugged together. I understand his reluctance to help, and know how taking her shadow would have affected him. But I also sense he feels the same and how this feeling confuses him. Despite his protests, Rohan is protective and sees her as a young girl who needs his help.
Not a daughter of shadow.
We were right to remove our clothes. Our hope we'd find somewhere safe to wash them fell away as the material disintegrated like the blood is acid. As we rode here, Calla sat side-saddle in my arms, I fought the images invading my mind. The girl is almost naked beneath her cloak, save a thin slip my hands could easily find their way beneath.
My arms surrounded her slim waist and she lay her head against my chest. Her closeness sends a desire I can’t explain to myself. Most girls need little persuasion to spend time naked with me, and I never need to fight how the arousal makes me feel. I barely pay attention because not one of those girls has aroused more than physical interest in me.
I always know I’ll win them over in the end: the High Lord and his status are intoxicating. As intoxicating as Calla is to me. The cloak around her slipped a couple of times as she dozed, and I pulled the thick material closer. Once, as I did, my fingers brushed her soft skin, and I ached to touch her further. I would never touch a woman without her consent, but I can't stop my imagination running wild. I imagined myself cupping her breasts the way I did her face before and kissing away the sorrow I saw back then.
Naked. In my bed.
Calla shifts and breaks her trance-like state, tipping her head to the nearby trees, which rustle in the breeze. "I saw Luin."
Rohan glances at me. We're both convinced he died at the hands of the Ebon elves who ambushed us. The girl is exhausted, likely hallucinating again. He whispers something to Calla who ignores him and continues to twist her head from tree to tree.
"No. I did, Rohan. He's here." Calla stands and in her haste and distraction, the cloak falls open.
Her back is to the other two men, but I'm blessed with the sight of Calla's body by firelight. Earlier, I saw her in damp clothes hugging her curves with a teasing outline of what’s beneath. This time, the slip has dropped from her shoulder in her haste to stand, revealing half of her chest.
I glimpse everything I imagined about Calla when we rode.
My eyes are drawn to the rounded breasts stroked by the firelight and another fleeting image of my mouth teasing her nipples crosses my mind. The slip has been ripped above her knees, leaving mere centimetres between the material edge and her backside. Her curved hips and the pleasure I know I could give her add to the ball-aching vision in front of me. Before I can turn my eyes away, Calla seizes the edges of the cloak and pulls it tight.
I give an apologetic smile as she bores an unimpressed look into my face before striding to a nearby tree and looking up. "Luin!"
Shit. No. I rush after Calla and grab her arm. "Please don't shout."
"Sorry. I forgot. I'm not used to hiding from people who want to capture or kill me." She shakes her head at the sarcasm. "But Luin is here, Leander. I can feel him."
I take hold of her cloak, still loose and likely to fall open again, and draw it tighter around her body. "Hold." She obeys as I unpin the clasp that has slipped and gather the material tighter still, repinning. My seal attached to a shadowmancer; I’d laugh if the situation weren't unfunny. Shadowmancers who killed my father and corrupted my family.
"And I'm sorry I looked at your nakedness.”
Her mouth quirks into a smile. "I wasn’t completely naked. And you're not sorry, are you?"
I focus on fastening the pin and my pulse races at how close her body is to mine. I tell myself, adjusting her cloak is to stop myself seeing her again, but know it's an excuse to get close. Not just to lie with her, but hold to make her feel my affection. To soothe her fear.
I don't respond but look up to meet her gaze, and in the dim light, I can see the pink tingeing Calla’s cheeks. Her mouth is parted, large eyes on mine and soft fingers reach out to touch my face.
"You're kind to me, Leander. Thank you."
"Surely Galen is too?”
Calla bites on the edge of her lip. Did something happen? "Yes. He is, but I think Galen has secrets."
"Everybody has secrets, Calla."
She doesn’t look away from me. "I don't."
"Not ones you understand."
This time she casts her eyes down. "Oh. Right. The evil shadowmancer Calla. The one Rohan detests."
I tip her chin. "He doesn't detest you. He fears you. And you're not evil."
"Do you fear me?" she whispers.
“No.”
“Detest me?” Her voice is meek, and my desire to take away the pain gathering in her eyes intensifies.
"No. Not at all." In a weak moment of wanting to prove my words, I move my mouth towards Calla's. The space between our lips feels charged by an eternity we haven’t lived yet; not magic but shared desire that would take us away from all this. I pull her closer, resting my hand in her lower back. Calla's mouth brushes mine, plump and soft. There’s an eagerness in her response as she sinks deeper into me, mouth parting.
Just as something brushes my head with a squawk.
"Luin!" Calla withdraws from my embrace and looks up, mouth parting further. Should I be jealous of how her eyes shine as she sees him?
I can't see the dragonkin, but his wings flap around my head sending cool air across my skin and into my hair. As he perches on Calla’s shoulder and nuzzles her cheek I give a wry smile. Her pinched face from the last few hours has transformed into a shining-eyed joy. This dragonkin pet of hers offers more comfort than I ever could.
Rohan appears at my shoulder, his hand on the sword hilt. "What's the commotion?"
His gaze lands on Luin who's now in Calla's arms, being lavished with the kisses she almost gave me. The love she exudes and excitement at his return are enough for me to accept I’m second best to a lizard. A memory of the fairy tale about princesses and frogs crosses my mind. I suppose Luin can't be a hidden man summoned back to life by a girl's kiss.
Even though all male dragons are also men.
21
CALLA
Luin’s return turned my day around. I sit by the fire and scold him, demanding to know where he’s been. The men watch me in amusement—the girl talking to her dragonkin, who has no chance of responding. I don’t care. Even if he can’t reply, I’m positive Luin understands some of what I say, and more than a dog knowing commands.
Galen offers Luin some of the dried meat from our dwindling food rations and he refuses. I explained that Luin probably caught something to eat if he’s been on his own a while. Luin prefers home cooking, especially my mother’s spiced meats, but I’ve seen him catch mice and other small rodents.
Or maybe the reason he won’t accept is because mutual distrust continues.
Despite the warm fire, I shiver beneath Leander’s cloak. Leander is distant now, across the fire from me, and I catch him watching my every move. He almost kissed me, and the thrill of a man such as him wanting me still runs through, as my body pulses with a need he aroused in me. I touch my mouth wonderin
g how his kiss would have felt.
The other men must be cold too, especially Galen who’s semi-naked beneath his cloak also. He sits beside me and I shuffle closer to his warmth. I haven’t asked him how he saved me earlier; I swear he used a magic I’m unaware exists. But I’m trying to understand my own first. There is so much I can’t comprehend, and I don’t know where to start.
“How are you?” he asks.
“Cold,” I admit.
“Would you like me to warm you up?”
I turn my eyes to his in surprise, before glancing at the others. Is he suggesting we continue from our kiss earlier? Here I am, fantasising about the man sitting across the fire from me, when the other who I did kiss might suggest we continue with more. My blood heats, and due to more than the fire close by.
“You can sleep close to me,” he continues. “I’m a little cold too.”
“Oh.” I look to where Rohan now snores nearby, his cloak wrapped around him and a pack beneath his head. The horses are tethered close by and Leander sits on watch opposite us, the flames flickering patterns across his face.
“If your dragon will allow me.” Galen laughs and points at where Luin is curled up asleep on my lap.
Leander interrupts our quiet conversation. “Personally, I think Luin would make a good look out. He can climb the tall trees nearby, and he’s loud enough to alert us.”
Is Leander annoyed because Luin interrupted our almost kiss? My stomach flips again at the memory, how his lips almost touched mine. At the possessive strength he held back and that I wish I’d felt.
“You’re right.” But I don’t want to disturb him. “Luin?” He doesn’t move so I poke his back. “Luin. Can you help us?”
As I speak, Galen stares down at the creature, nose wrinkled.
Luin shifts and looks at me. “We think Ebon are following us again. Could you keep a look out?” I ask.
He curls back up again and turns his back. I sigh.
“Dragon,” says Galen. Luin raises his head. Again, Galen speaks words in Elvish, his voice sounds stranger and sonorous in that tongue.
I’m surprised when Luin flits into the sky, and I watch his figure, shrouded by dark, disappear into a treetop.
“Are you a dragonkin whisperer?” I say with a laugh.
Galen takes a nearby stick and pokes at the fire. Embers glow brighter for a moment. “Dragons understand Elvish as well as Common.”
“You told me that elves have stronger connections to dragons than humans do.”
“We used to.” He stares at the fire. “The world is very different now, as you know.”
“Because the dragons are dead?”
“Or hidden, remember?” puts in Leander. “I don’t blame the dragons for exiling themselves after accusations all worked with the Ebon.”
“Again, a complicated story?” I ask with a light laugh.
“I told you some, but you will learn the full story about everything once you begin training.” Galen smiles at me. “When you’re less exhausted.”
There are no more cloaks to lie on over the rough ground and I long for a bed. Galen holds his arms out. “Here. We have some hours before sunrise. I’ll wrap you in my cloak too.”
“I might need to ask for my cloak back later,” says Leander from across the fire. “I’m bloody cold.”
“Not used to roughing it,” murmurs Rohan, opening an eye. He yawns and turns onto his side. “I’ll take over from your watch later and you can borrow my cloak then. Just let me sleep for a while.”
I remember the day I was lost in the woods near my house. Upset after a bad day at school, I persuaded two of my few friends to run away with me on an adventure. I was only ten and ignorant about the surroundings. Getting lost in the middle of the confusing trees in autumn wasn’t fun, especially when night fell.
Only one of us had a cloak and our attempt at making a fire resulted in a pathetic flame or two before it snuffed out. We ended the evening huddled together for warmth beneath the cloak and dozed until angry adults found us. Luin didn’t talk to me for two days when I returned home, outdoing my mother’s disgust.
There was something strange about how badly she reacted, and I remember a conversation I didn’t understand, one that strikes me now as strange. She thought someone had taken me from the shire. Children do go missing, and I knew I’d been scolded for that, but this felt harsher. Shouldn’t a mother be pleased when her daughter returns?
But I was ten years old. My companions were female. Even though the same tactic makes sense here, I’m worried about how they’ll react when the tension from attraction radiates to each man. The fact some of us are half-dressed and sharing cloaks makes this sharing body heat a sensible idea, but also more awkward.
“Sit with us, Leander,” I say. “You can still watch from here.”
I pat the ground beside me and he stands, crosses around to us before sitting. This is the closest we’ve been since Luin reappeared and he watches me with a mixture of wariness and the same desire from before.
He reaches out to hold my hand, his soft fingers curling around mine. “I was joking. I won’t take my cloak from you.”
Leander’s hand in mine sets a new shiver through me, and I picture myself in his arms between Galen and him. Warm. But beneath that is a different desire—not for warmth but for more.
“Then you must share,” I say quietly.
“Share my cloak?” His eyes glisten in the fire. “Or are you suggesting something else?”
“My warmth.”
“This makes sense.” I glance at Galen who’s smiling and poking at the fire again. He continues, “Calla needs sleep to prepare for her arrival at the stronghold. I think she’ll need to be well rested.”
“I doubt I’ll rest much sleeping here.” I run a hand across the uneven ground covered in stones and sticks.
Leander kneels and brushes at the surroundings, throwing debris to one side. “I will find you a better bed for tomorrow.”
“I bet you will,” chuckles Galen. “Leander has a fine bed, Calla.”
I stare at the flames, and my stomach fills with a fluttering sensation. Maybe my suggestion wasn’t smart. Of course, he’s a nobleman and would expect a girl to do as he says.
That thought also wanders in lustful directions. Leander’s domineering nature attracts me—a little too much.
“Perhaps when Rohan takes over I might join you?” Leander arches a brow. “In sleep.”
Hesitantly, I move closer to Galen and he shrouds us both in his cloak. His chest is still bare beneath and as my skin presses against his, I’m relieved I’m wearing something. Not that the slip I wear is much of a barrier. He lies down and curls a hand around my waist and I’m unable to forget how long it's been since I lay next to a man. I wrap an arm across his bare chest and place my cheek on the hard muscle.
Galen takes a sharp intake of breath. “Your hands are cold, Calla.”
I murmur an apology into his skin.
He smells the way I probably do— of salt and seaweed. I can’t resist playing my fingers along the muscle pushing into my cheek. Galen adjusts my cloak so it covers us like a blanket and strokes my hair. The soothing gesture has the opposite effect and my heart thumps against where I feel his speeding against my cheek too.
The warmth inside rises back to heat. I shift to bury my head beneath his neck wishing I had more cover to warm my back. My mind drifts to Leander whose hip rests against my backside as I’m curled up on my side. We fall into silence. The crackling fire fills my mind, and my closeness to the two men triggers more aching heat inside me.
I drift to sleep, my sore body eased by the comfort Galen wraps around me. I’m roused by a low conversation and open an eye. Rohan sits beside Leander, awake and alert. Unpinning his cloak, Rohan offers it to Leander and nods at me and Galen. He takes his sword from the ground, stands and tramps towards the edge of the clearing,
I close my eye and Leander moves. His warm, muscular body curls around mine
and a strong arm wraps around my waist, pulling me closer. I hold onto his forearm, aware how much more powerful and possessive he feels compared to Galen’s tender embrace.
I shift against him and my body is flush with his the way it is when we ride. Only this time there’s more. Leander’s soft breath in my hair shallows and his large hand rests on my hip. I squeeze my thighs together ignoring the insistent ache growing.
I’ve never been more aware of my body before, every place my skin meets the men lights up. Almost every inch of my skin is surrounded and I’m engulfed between them in a way I never have been.
Should the power in these men scare me? No, they mean me no harm. They have done everything possible to keep me safe. My feelings here waver between gratitude and a friendly affection for them all, including gruff Rohan, and a desire that’s grown the longer we’ve spent together.
Desire compounded by imagining the hands around my body exploring further. I never have this much attention from men, and I’m shocked that I greedily want more.
“Are you okay?” Galen whispers into my ear. “Are you having a nightmare?”
I’m confused by his words until I notice how my breath comes quicker with my racing pulse.
“No. I mean, yes. I’m okay.”
Galen dips his head so his lips reach my forehead. His lithe body is beneath my hands and the draw to him from before takes over. I wriggle upwards and kiss the hollow of his neck. His hand remains on the back of my head, and I grow in boldness, moving my lips along Galen’s skin towards his mouth, aching for another kiss like the one we shared earlier.
As my lips touch Galen’s, I’m equally aware of Leander when his hand resting on me tightens. The kiss I share with Galen is soft at first but grows in an urgency we’re unable to hide from the man who holds my hips against him.