by Karen Singer
“No! I’ve told you that before. It’s nothing like that.”
“Then what is it?”
“No!”
Sally shook her head. “Earth to Jenni. This is your mother speaking. Who do you work for?”
Jenni couldn’t help herself. She laughed at that. “Sorry, Aunt Sally…Mom!” She laughed. “I’d rather not tell you.”
Sally hadn’t wanted to do it, but she was tired of Jenni not telling her. “Jenni, earlier today, I saw you talking to that detective.”
“You did?”
“Yes! And I heard a little of what you two said together too.”
“You did?” Jenni said again, totally shocked.
“Yes! And it didn’t sound to me like he was exactly accusing you of murdering Grandpa.”
“He didn’t…at least not this time,” Jenni told her.
“It sounded more to me like you and he are working together.”
Jenni’s jaw dropped. “What gave you that impression?”
“Things I heard him say. Things I heard you say. Jenni, are you working as some kind of undercover agent for the police?”
Jenni’s jaw dropped again. “No! Definitely not! It’s just that…” She stopped right there.
“Jenni, what else am I supposed to think? From what I heard it sounded like you work for the police too, and he knows it, and he asked you to help him find out who did it.”
Jenni stared at her for a moment, not knowing what to say.
“So you do work for the police,” Sally concluded when Jenni didn’t reply.
“No. I don’t.”
“But you are working with that detective now.”
It was a moment before Jenni could answer. “Um…not really, but…kind of.”
“FBI?” Sally asked.
“Me?”
“Yes. If you don’t work for the police, then do you work for the FBI?”
“Aunt Sally, I get paid in cash for what I do. Don’t you think the FBI would at least give me a paycheck?”
“I don’t know what kind of arrangements you’ve made Jenni. You’re so determined to not have anything with your old name on it anymore, and since you can’t get any valid ID’s that say Jenni, who knows what kind of things you’ve come up with and arranged. Until a little while ago, I didn’t even know what you were wearing to make yourself look so good!”
Jenni didn’t say anything.
“I’m tired of playing twenty questions with you Jenni. I’m tired of not knowing how you bring home the money that you do. I worry about things like that, especially since I love you…more than ever. I told you earlier that I keep thinking of you as my own daughter lately. So that means I worry even more.”
She looked at Jenni for a moment, but neither of them said anything. Finally, she shook her head. “We know you do something that the police want your help with.” Sally finally said. “So it’s got to be either the police or something like them.”
Jenni looked down at her plate. “I work for a private investigation agency,” she said, not wanting to look up at her aunt.
“A private investigation agency?”
“Yeah,” Jenni replied, still looking down. She pulled her head up. “I do research for them.”
“Research?”
“Yes, research!” Jenni emphasized. “He pays me to research things.”
“Why are you so determined that nobody knows that?” Sally asked. “I don’t know for sure, but I would think there’s any number of people who do things like that for a living. I’m sure there’s all kinds of things that people ask researchers to do. I think a lot of people make their entire living doing that. I would think it’s something that you would be proud of.”
“I am proud of it,” Jenni replied. “I’m proud, because I not only like it, but I think I’ve gotten pretty darn good at it now.”
“So why are you so determined that nobody knows?”
“Because….” But what Jenni needed to say was hard to put into words. “Aunt Sally, look at it from my point of view. I don’t research just things. Most of what I research is people. I look deeply into the lives of whoever Mr. B wants me to. And I mean deeply. How would you feel about just talking to me, if you knew that I can go out there and find out tons of things about you that you never thought I possibly could? Wouldn’t you feel nervous about that?”
Sally was surprised to hear that. “Have you?” she asked tentatively. “Have you looked into me?”
“No! I haven’t. And I wouldn’t! But see, already you’re afraid of what I might have dug up about you…that I haven’t! Now add in that I’m a boy trying to become a woman. That means that everyone will already have even more concerns about me. Put all that together, and nobody will want to be around me. Ever!”
She stopped for a moment and saw her aunt just looking at her. “See,” Jenni said sadly. “Even now you don’t like it. Even now I…” She paused a moment. “I…already feel like you’re suspicious of me. I already feel like I’ve…lost your love.”
Jenni suddenly got up from the table. She grabbed her purse and hurried toward the door. “I’m sorry Aunt Sally,” she said as the tears started to fall. “That’s why I didn’t want you to know.”
“Jenni!” Sally called behind her as she too got up from the table. “Jenni, stop. Wait!”
Jenni stopped and Sally caught up with her. Jenni’s back was to her and she turned her around. The tears were already falling from Jenni’s eyes. Sally pulled her close and held her. “I’m sorry Jenni,” she said. “I didn’t mean to give you that impression. I just wanted to know, that’s all. Like I said, you feel like my own daughter to me, so I worry about you more. And Jenni, I don’t care if you dig into me. Dig all you want. I’ve got nothing at all to hide. In fact, I’ll be glad to sit down anytime and tell you all about anything you like. All you have to do is ask.” She continued to hold her for a few moments, listening to her soft crying. “I love you Jenni,” she said as she held her tighter. “I love you like my own daughter.”
Jenni cried harder, and hugged her aunt back. “I love you too, Aunt Sally. More than you know.”
The two held each other for a few moments. Sally finally pulled away. “Let’s go finish dinner. Okay?”
“Okay, Aunt Sally,” Jenni replied.
The two sat at the table again, but as Jenni forced herself to take another bite of her dinner, she noticed that her aunt was just looking at her. She set her fork down. “See,” she said, “Now that you know what I do, you’re even more uncertain of me. Don’t worry Aunt Sally, I promise, I’m not planning on looking into you at all. I know you didn’t do it.”
Sally smiled. “I’m glad you think so, but that’s not what I was thinking at all.”
“It wasn’t?”
“No. I’m trying to decide…” She shook her head. “Look, as long as we’re clearing the air about things, then maybe we should both be honest with each other.”
“What do you mean?”
“Jenni, I said you’re like a daughter to me. And one that I love very much.”
“Yeah? But?”
“But nothing! I meant it! And because of that, since we’re…talking about things now….” She sighed. “Jenni, something happened in my life that I haven’t told you about. Something that nobody but my mother knows. Nobody.”
Jenni was surprised. “What?”
“Promise you won’t tell anyone else.”
“Sure. No problem. Nobody talks to me anyway.”
“It’s just something that I’ve tried to keep hidden for many years now. Something I’ve spent most of my life trying to forget.”
Jenni could have asked what, but she sat there listening instead.
Sally looked at Jenni’s face. So…feminine…for a boy. Of course, all the makeup she wore helped. But beyond that, Jenni had been mentally female all her life. She seemed to understand things on a more feminine level than she guessed any man possibly could. Would Jenni understand? But then, she had already d
ecided to tell her. “Jenni, the summer after I graduated from high school. Daddy tried to rape me.”
Jenni’s jaw dropped. “He what?”
“He did. That was the first time Mom tried to divorce him.”
“Why didn’t she?”
Sally shook her head. “Despite the way everything seemed to look between them, the two of them really did love each other. They…worked it out I guess.”
“So what did you do?”
“Something I really shouldn’t have. I got married.”
“But it didn’t last.”
“No. You know that. I got married more as a way to run away from my father…or maybe as a way to run away from everyone in the whole house…or maybe run away from my entire life! Jenni, I didn’t let him get all the way, but he sure tried. He tried his best to pressure me into doing it. He even tried bribing me by offering to buy me a car.”
“Gee!”
“It was…pretty awful. I was a lot closer to my mother back then than I am now. I guess I’ve been closer to her than anyone except dad all my life. But when she didn’t do anything about it, I think I lost all my faith in her. I had more reason to get out of the house than ever. And so, I got married to my high school boyfriend, and what a mistake that was. Awful!”
“I think you told me it only lasted two years.”
“I tried to stick it out,” Sally explained. “But in the end, it just wasn’t worth it. I had a job by then, and I was able to just afford my own cheap apartment. So I divorced him and moved out. You know the rest.”
“And you never remarried,” Jenni noted.
“No. I think I’ve got too many bad memories of that marriage, and maybe a little bit of fear from my father as well.”
“You should find someone Aunt Sally. You deserve to be happy.”
Sally smiled. “I did find someone Jenni. Someone who made me very, very happy.”
“You did?”
“Yes. You! Jenni, you’re the best thing that ever happened to my life. The very best thing. I meant it when I said I think of you like my own daughter. I love you Jenni Finch. You’re the daughter I always wanted.”
Jenni got up from her seat and went to her aunt and hugged her. “I love you too…mom!” she said. “If only you really could have been my mother. I would have liked that so much.”
“Me too Jenni. Me too.”
Jenni took a big breath to clear her emotions and sat down again. “Thanks for telling me that,” she said. “And I promise, I won’t tell anyone!”
“Thanks, Jenni,” Sally replied. “I’m sure you won’t. But after all this time, It’s probably not really important anymore.”
“It is if you still feel that way.”
Sally smiled. “More coffee?”
“Sure, Aunt Sally.”
“So what are you doing for the detective?” Sally asked as she poured coffee for each of them.
“Just what I usually do for Mr. B,” Sally told her. “Look into everyone I can as thoroughly as I can.”
“Mr. B?”
“That’s Mr. Bosch. He’s my boss. I work for Bosch Investigating.”
“And you like working for him?”
“Yeah. A lot. He doesn’t pay me much, but he and his wife have been great.”
“His wife?”
“Yeah. It’s really just him and his wife that run the business. They just have me do research for them, and then he pays me in cash for whatever I put together.”
“And how long have you been working for them?”
“A long time now. Almost as long as I’ve been living with you.”
“And they hired you way back then? Even before you started looking so…good?”
Jenni chuckled. “Believe it or not. And trust me, even I couldn’t believe it.”
“How did you find the job? Did you answer an ad in the newspaper or something?”
“No. I was down at city hall, trying to find out what it would take for me to get new IDs with my Jenni name on them. Don’t ask!” Jenni added quickly. “If I could do it now, I’d already have done it. They require me to be under a doctor’s care first, and I need a verifying document from the doctor before they’ll do anything.”
Sally smiled, just happy to have Jenni finally telling her things. “So what happened?”
“Um…I kind of ran into Mr. B there. And he was complaining to the woman who runs the place that it took so long to find anything there that it was driving him crazy. So…um…I kind of opened my big mouth and told him I’d be glad to help him…if he’d pay me.”
“And he took you up on your offer?”
“Believe it or not. And since then, well, I’ve kind of gotten pretty good at it.”
“So you do all his looking up of things at city hall for him?”
“It’s a lot more than that. I do most of my research now on the internet first. Then I sometimes go to city hall or wherever I need to if I can’t find the records on the internet. Sometimes I do other things too.”
“Other things?”
Jenni shrugged. “Whatever he needs. It’s all part of the process.”
Sally thought about that for a moment, taking it all in. “And you’re looking into the family now?”
“Yeah. I just started. So far, I’ve found nothing, but all I’ve really done so far is to get organized. Mr. B…”
“That’s your boss.”
“Yeah. He says I need to talk to everyone in the family. Question them. But…I don’t want to talk to any of them.”
“I’m pretty sure that none of them will want to talk to you either. Why would your boss want you to talk to everyone, when you’re working with that detective now? Wouldn’t that be his job?”
“It is,” Jenni replied. “And I’m not really working for him. Mr. B just suggested I do whatever I can to help him solve this thing.” She looked directly at her aunt. “Aunt Sally, I didn’t kill Grandpa, but right now, all the evidence is pointing right at me. I’m his primary suspect! If I don’t help find who killed Grandpa, I could be the one to wind up in prison for it.”
The seriousness of that statement made Sally stare at Jenni for a moment. “But he’s accepting your help? That doesn’t sound like he’s considering you as a suspect at all.”
“I know, but I’m doing it. It’s…I don’t know. I’m going to keep sending him what I find whether he likes it or not. It’s the best I can do to clear myself…and find out who killed Grandpa. When I talked to him this morning, all I really wanted to do was get his email address so I could send him what I find.”
“I see,” Sally replied, realizing how serious this was. She had known that Jenni was being blamed for the murder by everyone in the family. She hadn’t known that Jenni was suspect number one for the police too. “Maybe, doing everything you can to clear your name wouldn’t be a bad idea at all.”
“That’s what Mr. B thinks.”
--- §§§§§§§§§§ ---
Jenni typed for a long time. She had spent much of the day trying to list what social media sites everyone in the family had. Then later, she had tried to make notes telling a little bit about everyone in the family from the things that she personally had known. She had only done that so that both Mr. B and Detective Pierce could have a better perspective of who each person was. It wasn’t until after she had finished typing her notes up that she realized that Pierce would get all the perspective he needed about each of them just from talking to them. But Mr. B wouldn’t be able to talk to any of them. He had been counting on her to do that for him. So far, she had only talked to her aunt, and that was it. She had more faith in Mr. B solving her Grandpa’s murder than she had in Detective Pierce.
She thought again about the fact that Mr. B had wanted her to talk to everyone in the family. She hadn’t. She hadn’t even been able to bring herself to try. And judging by what happened down in the restaurant earlier, it’s probably a good thing that she didn’t. Embarrassing! Why had she blown her top again? Someday, she was going t
o get that under control. Of course, if she could ever get a gender doctor, and if she could ever get on hormones, and if she could ever get the surgery she wanted so badly, she’d never have to worry about losing her temper over who and what she was again. There would never again be any question about it.
She read through her list of notes on the individual family members. She added in the list of every web address for their social media accounts she had been able to find. And finally, she spent a little while trying to type up her feelings, questions, and conclusions. Only…she didn’t have that many conclusions so far.
She didn’t forget to put in about seeing her grandfather kissing the woman from the hotel. While she mentioned nothing about her grandfather trying to rape Aunt Sally, she didn’t forget to add that her aunt had called him a letch…or the other things her aunt had told her about him, including all the possible divorce proceedings. She even added her own feelings that since she had seen her grandfather with the girl from the hotel, then maybe it was someone outside the family that had killed him. Revenge could be a powerful motive for murder.
Finally, she posed a question to both Mr. B and Detective Pierce. Since her grandfather had been stabbed in the back with a knife, was a crime like that something more like a man would do, or a woman?
With the click of a button, she emailed all of it off to both Mr. B, and Detective Pierce.
--- §§§§§§§§§§ ---
Pierce had been home for a while by the time he got Jenni’s email. He glanced briefly through what little she had mentioned about each family member. Why had she bothered? There was no useful information there, and much of it was things he already knew.
The list of media accounts could be helpful, but he wasn’t about to start spending hours on the internet looking at them. He “might” pass that on to someone else to do for him if he absolutely had to.
He was far more interested though in the things that Jenni said at the end. He was very interested in the fact that Judith Finch was once going to divorce her husband, and that her husband seemed to still have a very roving eye. Jenni had mentioned seeing her grandfather kissing one of the women who worked for the hotel. Information like that was usually nearly impossible to get. He wasn’t sure if it was the real motive behind the murder, but it was a valid possibility. He already knew that he would be looking into it further first thing tomorrow.