by TARA GALLINA
"Happy to have helped." He chugs more beer and turns away again.
Not good. He's still mad even after my compliment. I don't know how to fix this, and I need to or risk him firing me. "Sebastian. I'm sorry." I touch his arm.
He flinches away.
Because he's my boss and I shouldn’t be touching him at all. "I think I screwed things up here, and I want to fix them. Please."
"Worried you'll get fired?" He turns his head to the side but not enough to glance at me standing behind him. "I shouldn’t have hired you anyway. But I’m not going to fire you over this. It's not my style. We had fun. You got off, and I'll get off in the shower as soon as you leave."
Ouch. I wince, his words hurting me in a way I hadn't expected. "Why are you being like this?" Don't I know? I had it right the first time. He's untouchable. Not for me. This was a moment. My hookup. For whatever reason—the alcohol, the shock, the fight with Evan, or just the sexual attraction between us—he wanted me for a night, and he didn't assume I'd have sex with him or try to force me. He's the first guy who never has and that makes him special. Also, because he found my pleasure button, which makes him extra special.
With his back still to me, he finishes off his beer and lowers his hand, the neck of the bottle caught between his finger and thumb.
"I don't regret this Sebastian," I say. "But I think you do and I'm sorry for that. I won't do anything like it again. I'll keep things professional, friendly. I feel like this is my fault, and I don’t want you to hate me because of it. If you're worried I'll pressure you into being my boyfriend or something, you can relax. I wouldn’t do that. I know you're not available, and even if you were, I know I'm not your type."
He turns to me, his head high, his expression guarded. "No. You're nothing like my type." Conviction rings in his tone.
I stumble back a step, reeling with a fresh wave of hurt. This one strong enough to bring tears to my eyes. I blink them back and nod. "I should go."
"You were leaving anyway." He shrugs then strolls to the dresser near the bed and opens a drawer.
I continue to the stairs but stop before going down. Leaving like this seems wrong, but what else can I do? I try one last time to make things right. "For what it's worth, I think what we did was amazing. I'll never forget it. But I'll never bring it up again. I promise."
Before he can respond, I get out of dodge, racing down the steps so quickly, I’m surprised I don't trip. Outside his room, music thumps through the house, jarring me back to reality.
I glance to the hallway on the right where Evan had—what—almost attacked me? If it weren't for Sebastian, he would have. I shouldn't be mad at him for rejecting me—if that's what he did. I'm not even sure what happened.
What's worse, I don't know how to fix it. I don't know if it can be fixed.
A girl shrieks from somewhere nearby and then laughs. I flinch and press my back against Sebastian's door. Below, a guy traipses through the foyer with a girl slung over his shoulder, caveman-style.
My hand covers my racing heart. I'm too on edge to stay here. Sebastian's room was nice and quiet, away from all the glowing lights and chaos.
Good thing, I drove my car. I text Harper.
Not up for sleeping here tonight after what happened. Heading home. I'm fine, just tired. Please don’t worry. Stay with Nathan. We can talk tomorrow. Have fun.
Chapter 4
I SHAKE THE bottle of pineapple-banana smoothie and drink some before stuffing it into my laptop bag. Sebastian should be here in ten minutes. If he comes. He hasn't texted me since I left his room Friday night, and I haven't bothered to contact him.
Harper lumbers into the room, yawning and rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
"What are you doing here?" I ask, confused. "I thought you stayed at Nathan's."
"You do know today is Sunday, and the party was Friday night? I've had a day to recuperate. I'm fine. Really. Go back to sleep."
Ignoring me, she plops down on the white couch and curls up on her side, her head resting on a fluffy pillow. "Is that what you're wearing?"
Now she has a problem with how I’m dressed? I stop in front of the long mirror by the entrance and give myself a once-over. My blue button-down shirt ties at the waist, showing only a little skin. I paired it with preppy black shorts and nude wedges. My hair hangs in a thick ponytail near the top of my head. Black painted lashes frame my green eyes that have a bluish tint today thanks to my shirt color. Pink gloss coats my lips, and a hint of blush colors my cheeks.
"What's wrong with my outfit?" I face her. "I'm going for business casual. It's not like anyone will see me. I'm doing inventory all day."
She stuffs a pillow between her knees. "It's kinda sexy, shows off your legs. I guess I thought you'd be more professional, like heels and a long skirt. But don't listen to me. I'm sleepy."
"Which is why you should have stayed in bed or at Nathan's. You don't do mornings."
"Relax. I was already awake."
I give her an incredulous look.
"I was. I slept all day yesterday or else I would've come home then, but every time I moved, I felt like barfing. Remind me not to drink so much." She yawns and stretches. "Tell me about this guy who attacked you? Do I know him?"
"No. You don't know him, and he didn't attack me. He might have but Sebastian showed up and stopped him."
"Yeah. I heard, but no one was clear about what happened. Did the guy hurt you?"
"He pulled my hair and started to chase me but then Sebastian got there and scared him." I'm tired of saying his name. Tired of remembering what it felt like in his arms, his taste, and touch, and everything else he's capable of doing.
Harper sits up. "Your cheeks are turning bright red. Shit. Are you having a flashback? What if he did stuff you don't remember and your brain blocked it? I should call my mom. She has a friend who does meditation therapy to help people remem—"
"Please don't," I interrupt her, "I don't want to think about it, okay?"
"Okay." She scratches her head and sinks into the cushions. "It's a good thing Sebastian showed up when he did, don't you think?"
I nod, not wanting to talk about him either, and rifle through my bag making sure I have everything I need.
"He didn't come to the house to save you," Harper adds. "He saw the guys smoking in the game room on their security cameras and showed up to kick them out. He just happened to run into you and that guy on the way. You were lucky."
I pause. "Funny, I don't feel lucky."
"I'm sorry your hookup was a bust."
"Hookup?" My shoulders tense. Did she hear about me messing around with Sebastian?
"Wait. You didn't make out with him, did you?"
"Who?"
"The guy. The one who attacked you."
"Oh." I exhale with relief. "No. Not at all."
Her gray eyes narrow. "Who did you think I was talking about?"
Uh? "No one. I was confused."
"Good. Because there's something else I need to tell you."
I lower onto one of the dining room chairs, my back stiff as I wait for her to continue.
She straightens her legs and rests her feet on the furry ottoman coffee table. "I heard a bunch of stuff about Sebastian last night. Bad stuff."
I stiffen even more. "Like?"
"I met this girl, Sera, it's short for Seraphina. Isn't that pretty? She's from India or something. Anyway. She used to date Riley."
"Riley has an ex-girlfriend?" I don't know why I latch onto that.
"Right?" Her eyes bug. "I was shocked too. I thought he was a wham-bam-thank-you-mam kind of guy. I've seen him hook-up with different girls at the house, but nothing more than that. Maybe because he and Sera dated for so long. Anyway, when they were a couple, they used to double date with Marina and Sebastian."
"Oh?" I lean forward.
"She said Marina is spoiled and used to getting her way about everything. She also said Marina and Sebastian fucked like all the time and were into really kinky shit,"
I know her well enough to know it's meant to intimidate me, the virgin twenty-year-old who never opened the vibrator Harper bought me last Christmas.
"But that's not the worst part," she goes on. "One night Marina got drunk and told Sera Sebastian is in the mafia and she is too, and their parents are making them get married old-school style to join the families. He's not engaged. He's betrothed." She puts her hands to her head and pushes them off with an explosive sound. "Mind blown. Right?"
"Betrothed? How is that any different? It's just a medieval word for engaged." And he's been lying to me about it this whole time. Why? Because he knew I wanted him? Because he wanted to see how far I'd go but knew I wouldn't touch him if he was engaged?
"You're missing the most important part, like him being in the mafia. If he's in the mafia, then his business is, the business you work for, ergo, you are now connected to the mafia."
I jump up from the chair and almost knock it over. "No I'm not. I can't be. It's just a rumor. The mafia isn't real. Not anymore, and certainly not here."
"Think about it," she says. "He's got a shitton of money. Comes from New York. He's super secretive and he's paying you a hellava lot more than minimum wage to answer phones that barely ring. Whose cars do you think he works on? Anyone ever call to repair a bullet hole?"
"No." My pulse hammers. I pace the space between the dining table and couch. "The calls seem random and harmless, and yes, he pays me a lot, but I finagled it out of him. He thinks I made that before." The part that really bothers me is that he's engaged. He was engaged when he was licking and sucking my—don't go there. Now is not the time.
"You're going to quit, right?" Harper crosses one ankle over the other. "You'd be a fool to stay working for him knowing this."
"I'd be a failure like my mom has always predicted if I don’t work for him. Money doesn't grow on trees. Great. Now I'm quoting her. I can't quit. Not yet, anyway." I pace faster and trip over a bump in the living room rug.
"I think you should, and you should cut Sebastian out of your life entirely."
"Wait." I stop and face her. "Did you ask Nathan about this?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Sera told me not to tell anyone."
"But Nathan is your boyfriend. You could talk to him about this." Unless she's telling me for other reasons. Like she thinks I want Sebastian and she wants me away from him. This theory would make her uber selfish, but I can't bring myself to believe Sebastian would drag me into a dirty business. Or, she's telling the truth because everything she says makes a little sense. "Nathan is friends with Sebastian and Nathan is a good guy. You trust his judgment, right?"
She nods. "I'm sleeping with him, so I must."
Interesting logic. Arguable, but for another time. "My point is, if Nathan thought Sebastian was bad, or Riley for that matter, I don't think they'd be friends with Sebastian let alone live with him."
Riley did mention dirty politicians to me though and they could be dirty because they're getting money from the mob.
Sweat beads above my lip. This is not good. I only stress-sweat when I'm on the verge of freaking out. Gah! I tug my ponytail until it hurts.
"Stop it," Harper shouts and lurches forward but doesn't get off the couch. "What are you doing?"
My phone chimes with a text. I dig it out of my bag. It's Sebastian.
I'm downstairs parked in front.
"Shit, shit, shit."
Harper gasps. "You're swearing."
"I swear." Why does everyone act like that's a big deal?
"You tween swear. Crap. Damn. Teenagers have a bigger cuss vocabulary."
She may have a point. I hold back because of my mother. The woman despises swearing yet she'll shred you apart with a look.
I need to calm down and stop thinking about her. That won't help my anger, and I'm angry at Sebastian for lying to me. If I could quit, I would. But I have bills and I will not mooch money from my friends.
"Sebastian is downstairs. I have to go."
"No, you don't." She fans her hair above the back of the couch. "Going is stupid."
"You wouldn’t understand." I stop at the door. "Thank you for telling me this. I will be careful, and I will also look for a new job today."
"You're making a mistake," she calls out as I close the door behind me.
Wouldn't be the first time.
More sweat beads across my skin as I approach Sebastian's car. Dark tinted windows make it hard to see inside. Sebastian's hand grips the steering wheel, his silver watch shining through the front windshield.
I clutch the passenger door handle and pause. I don’t want to go with him, but I need the money. I could grill him here in the parking lot. He could also fire me for digging into his private business. Friday night might have pushed him too far, and even though he said he wouldn’t fire me over what we did, who's to say he won't about this?
The window rolls down. "Is there a problem?" he asks in his deep, raspy voice.
"I’m nervous." It's an honest response.
"That's my fault. If you get in, we can talk, and I will try to fix it." He sounds sincere.
"I didn't even know if you were coming this morning, and then you were late, and I thought … maybe I should look for another job." What does it matter? I'm not keeping this one.
His door opens, and he walks around to my side of the car. As usual, he looks amazing. Silver aviator sunglasses shield his eyes. His hair tousles in the breeze, messier than its usual perfect style. A white button-down shirt, with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows, tucks into pants made of light gray canvas-type material. They too are more casual than his usual fitted dress pants.
Everything hugs his sculpted physique, making the outfit sexy.
"You're looking at me like you want a repeat of Friday night." The reminder jolts me like a bucket of cold water.
I lift my chin and focus on his left ear, refusing to connect with his eyes even behind sunglasses. "I don't want to talk about that. Ever again. I wish I could forget it happened."
He rubs his chest over his heart. "That hurts, Ainsley."
My gaze jumps to his. "Like you care."
He slides off his glasses and pins me with those unique eyes, the blue beaming against the brown in the bright sun. "I shouldn't have let you run off. You were confused, and sweet, and I was a dick. I should have explained myself better." He steps toward me.
I move back and glance up at the window to Harper's apartment. "Maybe we should talk in the car."
"If that's what you want."
"I do."
The engine is still running with his door wide open, letting out the cool air.
He opens the door for me. I lower onto the cool leather seat and set my bag on the floor. A moment later, he slides behind the wheel and seals us inside. Leather and his cologne perfume the air. Everything is dark, sleek, and sporty. The vehicle version of Sebastian.
"You look beautiful," he says to my shock.
"Don't say that," I snap. "Just, let’s go. We're already late."
"Tell me what I can do to fix this?" He rests his hand on the stick shift, his fingers twitching like he wants to touch my leg.
"You can't. It's done. I get it, or I don't, but I will. I'm good at pretending." I spent years perfecting it with my mother.
He doesn't put the car in reverse.
"Can we go, please? I don’t want Harper to see us."
"Why are you so concerned about her? She's with Nathan. They're exclusive now in case you didn't know. I wouldn't touch her anyway. Not before she was with Nathan and not after. I explained this to you already."
I cross my arms over my chest, attempting to contain my anger or else I might explode.
"Hey?" He slides his finger across my bare thigh. Yeah, these shorts are way too short.
I smack his hand away and glare at him.
"There are those pretty eyes."
"What is wrong with you? You mess around with me, get pissed at me afterward, ignore me, leaving me to wonder if I have a job—which you know I need—and then show up here like everything is fine between us. In case you didn't know, Harper is home and she told me a bunch of crap about you that I'm wondering is true. For example, she said you are betrothed to Marina, which would make you a liar. She also said, both your families are in the mafia. Is your business illegal? Is your family really a part of that? Your dad sounds like he could be. Am I caught up in this now?"
I didn't mean to say all that, but now that it's out, I think I did the right thing.
He stiffens then puts the car in reverse. "You're right. We can't talk here."
Chapter 5
"WHERE ARE WE going?" I clutch my armrest as he backs out of the spot and drives to the complex exit.
"There is work to do at the body shop but first we need to talk."
"Where?"
He pulls onto Denning, headed south.
"I don’t want to go to Nathan's. I don’t want to go there ever again."
"Okay," he grinds out, his jaw tight. "Why not?"
I glance out the passenger side window, watching the park and playground as we go by. "Bad things happen there."
"Evan was the first bad event in a long time."
"I’m not talking about him." I shudder at what might have happened had Sebastian not shown up and made things amazing before making them worse. To know all this time, he's been lying about his engagement. Hurt invades me like a poison and my eyes fill with tears. Have I ever cried this much in my life? Geez. This is pathetic.
I keep my head turned to hide my tears and sniffle. "Can you pull over? Please. I need to get out."
"Hang on." He turns onto Fairbanks, toward Nathan's house.
I clutch the door handle. "Pull over, or I'll jump out."
He grabs my arm. "Dammit, Ainsley. Just wait a minute." He steers the car to the right and pulls into an RV dealership.
Oddly, I've always wanted to stop here and tour the fancy RV's, curious about what they're like on the inside. But not now, and not with him.
Sebastian parks by the office.
I shove open the door, jump out, and stalk across the lot toward the road, intent on walking home.
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