Alex tapped the eraser end of a pencil on the stack of papers before him. “That’s your imagination.”
“Don’t bullshit a bullshitter. This is me, and it’s not like you didn’t already tell me my absence at La Tavola got you laid.”
“That doesn’t change the fact that you owe me a steak dinner.”
“Come on, man. You should be taking me out to dinner, as a thank you.”
“Of course you’d see it that way,” Alex said dryly, though he didn’t completely disagree. If not for Rashad, he’d still be in the same work, home, hospital cycle before Sherry became a part of his life and changed his outlook.
Rashad had bailed on him after one of his out-of-town lady friends flew in unexpectedly and asked to see him. Over the years, Alex had come to realize the importance of women in Rashad’s life. Chocolate-skinned and with a smile worthy of a toothpaste ad, Rashad looked like the kind of guy who should be headlining movies. He parlayed his good looks and flamboyant dress—a diamond in each ear, and today a dark red pinstriped suit that only he could pull off—into the bedrooms of more women than Alex could keep track of.
“So the two of you still pretending you’re not together?” Rashad asked, as Alex stood.
“That’s the way she wants it.”
“You mean that’s the way you want it.”
Alex closed his computer and gave his friend his undivided attention. “It’s for the best, for both of us. For now.”
“And how long are you planning to keep this secret? The two of you have been running around town together, going on helicopter rides and hiking and shit, and then you come into the office and pretend there’s nothing going on.”
“It hasn’t been that long.”
“Your head’s been messed up since the first night you spent with her. Not to mention you’ve been carrying a boner for her ever since you hired her.”
“You’re exaggerating.” Alex went behind his desk and grabbed his jacket off the back of the chair. As he slipped his hands through the sleeves, Rashad crossed his arms and looked at him like a disapproving father.
“I have never seen you like this, not once, over any woman. Before you even slept with her, all you did was talk about how sweet she was and her smile and all that shit. Come on, Alex. How do you really feel about her? Because you’re right, she’s sweet. She’s a good woman. She’s not playing games, and you have to know that, because I can see it just by the way she carries herself in the office.”
Alex absorbed the truth of Rashad’s words and sank onto the edge of the desk.
“She’s the One,” he answered without reservation or embarrassment. He’d had plenty of time to consider his feelings, and he had no doubt that Sherry was the woman he’d been looking for all along. The reason every other relationship didn’t work. He wanted to lock her down. He wanted to make her his until the end of time.
Rashad’s eyebrows rose. He might have suspected that Alex had feelings for Sherry, but he didn’t expect them to run so deep.
“Tell me you’re kidding, bruh. The One? No such thing exists. That’s some nonsense women invented to tie us down. Besides”—his voice lowered—“there’s that little situation with you and Heather.”
Alex immediately sobered. “I know.” He ran a weary hand down his face.
“I can’t tell you what to do—”
“Since when?” They’d known each other since they were eighteen years old, and just like blood brothers behaved, neither was known for holding his tongue.
Rashad chuckled. “Okay, I can tell you what to do, but that doesn’t mean you’ll listen.” He stuffed his hands into his pockets again, a serious expression on his face. “Listen man, Sherry seems great, and maybe what you feel for her is genuine.”
“It is genuine,” Alex said firmly.
“Well, like I said, I’ve never seen you like this.”
“I’ve never felt like this.”
Rashad held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, fine. So if you really think she’s the One, you know what you need to do.”
“Yes. I know.” Alex rubbed the back of his neck.
He needed to be honest and upfront, but the situation had already gotten out of hand. Their relationship had been unexpected and moved so fast. How could he tell Sherry the truth now? Maybe he’d become too cynical, but she was the one bright spot in a world he sometimes wanted to burn to the ground.
“Bite the bullet,” Rashad advised. “She might understand.”
“Maybe.”
“You can’t not tell her.”
“You think I don’t know that?” Alex snapped.
“Then what are you doing?” Rashad snapped back. “You’ve always been honest and upfront with women, and most of them didn’t care. What’s different—”
“She is!” Alex glared at his friend. “She is,” he said in a calmer voice. “That’s the difference. It’s her. I don’t want to lose her if I tell her the truth. Because she might not understand.”
Whether she did or not, Alex couldn’t deny he needed to tell Sherry everything. Rashad was right that she deserved to know.
But if he told her, would she understand?
10
“You met someone.”
Alex stopped in the middle of fluffing the pillows behind Heather’s head. Her long blonde hair had long ago lost its luster, and her pale blue eyes no longer sparkled. Yet she managed a smile that gave him a small measure of hope that maybe all was not lost. That maybe everything the doctors had subjected her to over the past couple of years—the steroids, the surgery, the medicines and experimental drugs—was not in vain. He hoped that one day soon he’d be walking her out the exit doors, into the car, and away from this place for good.
“How did you know?”
“Aside from the fact that I don’t see you as often? Rashad.”
“Rashad talks too much.”
“Tell me about her.”
Alex hesitated. He no longer discussed his love life with Heather. He’d stopped because he didn’t want her to think the reason he hadn’t pursued a relationship with anyone else was because of her. She didn’t need that burden of guilt on top of everything else she had to deal with. He silently cursed at Rashad for even mentioning Sherry to Heather.
“It’s nothing,” he said.
“Well, if it’s nothing, then you should have no problem telling me about her.” Heather’s voice had grown firm, the way it always did when she pushed back against something he and Rashad thought was best for her.
He sat on the side of the bed. “My love life is none of your concern.”
“Since when?” she asked.
“You need to concentrate on getting better, so we can get you out of this—”
“Stop it.” She was no longer joking and took a tremulous breath. “You know that’s not going to happen.”
Her words gutted him. She couldn’t give up. Not when she’d managed to survive several near-death episodes with this dreaded disease. Eight months ago the doctors had told them to prepare for organ failure and death, but she’d proved them wrong and was still here. He couldn’t allow her to give up.
“Of course you’re going to get out of here. It’s only a matter of time. You have to have faith and stay positive.”
“It took them too long to figure out what was wrong with me,” Heather said.
Her first episode had occurred a couple of years ago, and Alex and Rashad had flown to Texas to find out what was going on. She’d responded well to steroids and was released from the hospital, but when the second episode hit only a month later, treatment by a drug used for leukemia had been the only way to save her.
By then, the damage had been done. She’d lost vision in one eye and suffered from kidney failure. Months later, she was in the hospital again, that episode making one of her lungs useless and causing a series of small strokes that made her more frail.
Alex took her hand and squeezed. “But now that we know what’s wrong, they can help you
. That’s why Rashad and I brought you here. So you can get the care of a doctor who specializes in this disease. Don’t you dare give up.”
Heather’s head lolled to the side so she could look out the window. He’d never seen her so despondent, and her lack of response ate at him. A few years ago she’d been energetic, fun-loving, and on top of the world. In a short time, she’d lost her enthusiasm, grown tired and lethargic. And there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.
Rashad walked in holding two cups of coffee. “This is pretty good coffee,” he said, handing one to Alex. “They’ve got a gourmet coffee shop down there, but I brought you a plain coffee.” He went to the other side of the bed and sat down.
“He won’t tell me about his new girlfriend,” Heather said. “So why don’t you tell me?”
Rashad glanced at Alex. “Oh, he’s a goner, Heather,” he said with a grin.
“You mean there’s a woman alive who has captured the heart of our brooding Colombian heartthrob?” she teased.
“You heard it here first,” Rashad said.
“Both of you can stop now, anytime you’re ready.” Alex sipped his coffee. Rashad was correct. The coffee wasn’t bad at all. He set the Styrofoam cup on the table beside the bed and listened to Rashad give a rundown of his relationship with Sherry.
Occasionally, Heather asked questions, and when Alex thought Rashad was exaggerating, he interjected a correction to the narrative. The three of them laughed and talked like they always did when they came together. Eventually, the conversation shifted to Rashad and the stream of women who went through the revolving door of his home. That gave Alex a chance to turn the tables and give him a hard time.
Finally, Heather shook her head and laughed. “You’re never going to change, are you?”
“Why change when nothing’s wrong?” Rashad asked.
Alex noted Heather’s tired expression. Her eyes drooped and she stifled a yawn. They’d worn her out. He stood. “Time for us to get out of here, Rashad.”
His friend nodded, getting to his feet, too.
“No, you guys can stay.” Heather reached out her hands to them.
“Nah, Alex is right. You look tired, babe. You know we’ll be back again in the next day or two.” Rashad bent down and kissed her on the forehead.
She took his hand in hers, and the mood in the room shifted. The air became heavy with regret and unspoken words.
Heather’s gaze connected with Alex’s, and she extended her hand to him as well. He took it but didn’t want to hear what she was about to say, yet knew he couldn’t stop her.
“I love you guys so much,” Heather said thickly.
Rashad glanced away out the window, as if he couldn’t bear to look at her.
Tears filled Heather’s eyes. “I couldn’t be loved more if you were actually my blood. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you, but know that I’ll do anything within my power that you ask me to do. If I can do it.”
“The only thing we want you to do is get better,” Alex said.
“I’ll do my best.” Her smile was wan and sad. “Any woman would be lucky to have either of you. But lucky me, I’m fortunate to have you both in my life. And for that, I’m forever thankful. Whatever happens moving forward, I want you to know how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. The sacrifices you’ve made.”
“It’s not over yet,” Alex said in a thick voice.
She didn’t respond, and the helplessness he always encountered whenever he contemplated her situation beat unrestricted inside his chest.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, or the next day. I’ll be happy whenever you come. But please don’t put your life on hold for me,” she said.
A tear slipped from the corner of her eye, and Alex swiped it away with his finger.
“Everything we’ve done, we’ve wanted to do. Willingly. Don’t you forget that.”
“I know. Just another reason for me to love you so much.”
Alex kissed her knuckles. “Get some rest.”
Moments later, he and Rashad left the room. Neither of them spoke as they walked quietly out of the building and stood under the overhang in silence.
“She’s going to make it, right?” Rashad turned to him, his eyes glistening with tears.
Alex stared across the parking lot, watching the people milling around. A steady flow of traffic exited and entered the building through the automatic doors.
He couldn’t answer Rashad’s question, because he didn’t know the answer.
And he didn’t want to lie.
11
Whenever Sunshine Volunteers chose the hospital as one of their locations to work, Sherry happily participated. Some of the volunteers didn’t like working at the hospital because of the antiseptic smell, and the sight of sick people depressed them. But Sherry saw the environment in a different way. Visiting the hospital was an opportunity to bring joy and positivity into the lives of people who were otherwise distressed by whatever illness forced them to be there.
Today they were delivering the flowers from a celebrity wedding. The bouquets had been table settings in the reception and all over the church, and instead of discarding them, the bride had donated every single one to the group. Taking them to the patients meant they could be reused to brighten someone’s day. They were also delivering toys, books, and coloring books to the kids in the children’s wing—all collected during a recent donation drive.
Sherry and Shawna covered the hospital, working two two-hour shifts, and Sherry started with the children. After the first two hours, they made their way to the cafeteria for lunch before getting back to work for the last two hours in the afternoon. At that point, they’d swap roles. Shawna would visit with the children, and Sherry would spend time with the adults.
After going through the cafeteria line and getting their food, they sat down across from each other.
“Hospital food has come a long way,” Shawna remarked.
“It has.” Sherry dipped her fork into a mountain of chicken-fried rice. Today’s theme was Chinese food. Shawna had chosen sweet and sour chicken.
“How were the kids?” Shawna asked.
“Wonderful, as usual. I’m always amazed at how much of a great attitude they have, you know? One little boy was so thankful for the coloring book I gave him, he insisted on giving me a hug. Even though he was in pain, poor baby. It broke my heart, but made me happy at the same time.”
She had been volunteering for years. Service had been instilled in her by her parents ever since she was little and joined them and other church members for the annual Thanksgiving food drive, serving meals to people who lived in the community surrounding the church. The bravery of the children Sherry met always amazed her, even back then, and how they managed to stay upbeat and keep a positive outlook in some of the most dire circumstances. They were her favorite group to work with because of how their little faces lit up when they received their gifts.
“Children are amazingly resilient,” Shawna agreed. “I’m genuinely surprised at how much strength they can have, but I think part of that strength is drawn from us, the adults. If they see that we’re positive, they feed off that energy. I’ve noticed it with my own kids. If Ryan and I are upset with each other or for whatever reason or not our usual affectionate selves, the kids notice. They’ll even try to cheer us up by climbing into our laps or doing something silly to make us laugh.”
Sherry listened intently to her friend, imagining the day when she and Alex would have children of their own. They weren’t long into their secret relationship, but it didn’t seem far-fetched to think about a future with him. She already imagined them married and sharing a bed every night.
They were in sync in every way, but at times she wondered if the speed with which they’d come together overwhelmed him. She wasn’t overwhelmed. She’d harbored feelings for him for a long time, so it was a relief to finally be open about it.
She suspected he felt some of what she did. At times she caught
him staring at her or sensed he wanted to say something but held back. One day he would reveal his innermost thoughts, and she would, too.
Her phone beeped, and when she checked the screen, she’d received a text.
Alex: Just left the hospital. Didn’t want to bother you. I’ll see you tonight.
She frowned. She’d wanted to see him because he told her he would be at the hospital to see his friend Heather.
“What’s wrong?” Shawna asked.
“It’s a text from Alex.”
“Oh, your new man?”
“Yes.” Sherry blushed. “I thought I’d see him before he left the hospital, but he’s already gone. I wanted to meet his friend, but I’ll have to do that another time, I guess.”
She’d broached the subject with him because he spent so much time at the hospital visiting Heather. She didn’t want to encroach on their relationship, but she’d followed through and prayed for her like she’d promised. For that reason, she wanted to at least meet the woman she prayed for regularly.
“Did he say why he had to leave suddenly?” Shawna sipped her water.
“He didn’t.”
They ate in silence for a bit.
“Can I ask you something?” Shawna asked.
“Sure.”
“If it’s none of my business, feel free to tell me. But you’ve spent a lot of time with Alex, at least based on our conversations.”
Sherry set down her fork. “I know where you’re going with this. You think we’re spending too much time together, that maybe I’m too into him.” Her parents had expressed the same concerns. Not only that she and Alex spent a lot of time together, but they worked together and saw each other every day. They worried that she was moving too fast.
“I’m not judging. I just don’t want you to get hurt again. How much do you really know about him?”
“Everything I need to know,” Sherry said, getting defensive, the way she did when her parents questioned the relationship. They thought this was a rebound thing from Stan, but it wasn’t. She took a deep breath and decided to share her feelings with her friend—feelings she hadn’t shared with anyone else and hardly wanted to acknowledge herself. “He’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a man. He’s kind, honest, sexy, smart, and we have fun together. I think…I think I’ve fallen in love with him.”
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