by Katy Kaylee
I still didn’t know how talking to other vets would help me, but Gavin and Summer had invested a lot of time and energy into me and I felt I owed it to them to give it a go. So, this morning, I followed through on what I told Summer I’d do and called the counselor she referred me to. He couldn’t see me alone today, but he did get me in a group. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, and I figured the visit could be made better with a visit to Summer’s office.
I wasn’t disappointed. After bringing her to cum on my tongue, I was straining against my pants.
I undid my jeans and shoved them down. “See what you do to me, Summer?”
Her eyes flashed with heated desire as she reached out to stroke my thickness. I closed my eyes and let her touch me for a moment.
“I wish you saw you the way I see you.”
My eyes flew open. “What do you mean?”
“Beautiful. Kind. Gentle. Strong.”
I smirked. “I’m not strong.” A strong man wouldn’t be so afraid all the time, waiting for a world of doom to envelop him. A strong man would be able to do what was best for Summer and her child and stay out of their lives. But I didn’t say any of this because I didn’t want to talk. I wanted to slide into Summer’s slick heat and lose myself there.
Thankfully, she decided not to fight me on that and instead sighed. Just to make sure, I kissed her, unzipping the back of her dress and pulling it down. “I want to see your breasts, Summer.”
Her dress was bunched at her waist as she removed her bra and let those glorious globes go free. I sucked on one and then the other, moaning at their softness, at her sweet scent.
Then I kissed her lips again, and once I’d done so thoroughly, I pushed her back until she was against the desk. I lifted her, pushing her legs open.
“Your pussy is so fucking hot.” I took my cock and ran the head through her folds.
“Rafe,” she gasped.
“Yes.” I ran it over her again, teasing her clit with the head of my dick.
“Fuck me. God, I need you inside me.”
Hearing Summer ask me to fuck her, hear her desperate plea, was like music. It made my ego swell that I could make this angelic, sexy woman beg me.
I indulged her, but only a little bit. I pushed the head of my cock inside her. “Is that what you want, Summer.”
“Yes. More. Please more, Rafe.”
I withdrew and she swore. I laughed. “My sweet Summer.” I pushed in again, this time going deeper. Her legs wrapped around my ass and used them to pull me closer. “So greedy.”
“Don’t tease me, Rafe.”
I lay her back on her desk, hoping the files under her back and ass weren’t too important. I kissed her hard and then straightened. Holding her hips, I began to thrust, in and out, in a strong steady pace.
Her hips lifted and her head tilted back. “Yes, God yes. I love how you fill me. So good…”
I watched her as I continued to fuck her. Her breasts swayed with each thrust. I reached out, taking those massive globes in my hands, kneading and tweaking her nipples as I continued to fuck her.
Her breathing quickened, and her pussy started pulsing around my dick. “You going to come, baby?”
“Yes.” Her fingers clutched the end of the desk and her hips lifted faster and faster.
I licked my thumb and rubbed her hard clit as I picked up the pace, surging inside her. My own release was on the edge, but I held it at bay, wanting to watch as pleasure swept through my sweet Summer.
“Yes, yes, yes... “ she chanted. And then her body arched, her mouth formed a perfect O and her pussy gripped my dick so hard I thought she’d never let go.
“Ah fuck, Summer…” I gritted my teeth to keep from coming. Not yet, I told myself over and over as Summer’s pussy massaged my cock until I thought I saw stars.
Finally, her body softened. She lay on her desk, completely spent, but with a satisfied smile.
Then she frowned. “Something wrong? You haven’t come.”
I smiled as I thought about the orgasm I would eventually have. “Not yet. One more, Summer, and then I’ll blast my cum inside you. Do you want that?”
Her hazel eyes flashed with heat. “Yes.”
I helped her up, kissing her as I thrust in short strokes inside her. Then I withdrew, hating the loss of contact, but wanting to change things up. I helped her down from the desk, and I was thankful she was letting me direct this sexual play. I turned her so she was facing the desk and her back was to me.
I lifted her skirt up to her waist revealing her fantastic round behind, “I love your ass, Summer.” I squeezed each cheek as I leaned forward and kissed the back of her neck.
She responded by wiggling her ass against my hard cock. Taking him in my hand, I maneuvered him to her wet pussy entrance. In one hard thrust, I entered her and held us still as sensation washed over my body. I imagined it was like what a junkie felt when he first shot up. A rush of elation and sweet satisfaction. This was all the therapy I needed.
I withdrew and thrust in again, loving her soft moans as she leaned forward with her hands on her desk. I reached around her, massaging her tits.
“Someday, I want to fuck these,” I whispered in her ear.
“Perhaps you could finish fucking my pussy first.”
I chuckled. “Yes, ma’am.” I gripped her hips and began to move steadily in and out of her. Each time, the sweet friction built until I couldn’t control the pace or force. I let go and let my base needs take over. I rammed into her, my hips making a slapping sound on her backside each time I filled her to the hilt.
“Oh God, Rafe.”
“Tell me you’re there, baby.”
She moaned. “So close…ooh…” Her body clamped down around my cock and my orgasm slammed into me rushing through my body like a tidal wave.
I pressed my lips to her shoulder to keep from yelling out as I continued to move in her, drawing out both our pleasure until my dick slipped from her completely used up. I held her there for a moment as my breathing returned to normal, but also, to stay close to her before our lives had to go back to normal.
“Can I see you and Emma later? I can bring pizza or stop by Nellie Mae’s for barbecue,” I asked. It was becoming more and more apparent that I needed to be near this woman.
Summer turned in my arms. “I can cook if you’d like to have dinner with us.”
“I’d like that.” I fucking needed it, which was terrifying and yet, filled me with hope too. Hope that maybe I’d be able to have a normal life.
“We won’t be able to do this.” She eyed my dick. “Not while Emma is there.”
I nodded. “That’s not what all this is about, Summer. Not for me.”
She smiled, and it was like the sun. “Me neither.” She grabbed some tissue, handing me some to clean up as she cleaned herself up. “But right now, I have to get ready for a client.”
I put myself back together, gave her another kiss, and then headed out.
On the way home, I reflected on my group session that morning. Because I’d decided I had to commit to trying counseling, I shared about my episode with the helicopter and Lester Smalls. The other members nodded, clearly having had similar incidents. The leader asked if I was transported to a specific time during my episodes, and while I hated going back to it, I told them about the day I lost many of my brothers, my dog, and nearly my life.
“War is fucked up,” one member said. “They don’t tell you that part at the recruiting office.”
“No, they don’t,” I agreed.
“Have you considered getting a dog now that you’re home?” Another member asked.
I flinched, thinking it was a ridiculous idea. You can’t replace someone or something as important as your partner.
“They do have specifically trained dogs to help with PTSD,” the leader said. “Or you can get one just as a pet.”
As I drove home, I began to wonder if maybe they were on to something. It might be good to be respons
ible for something else simply to help me get out of my own head sometimes. The idea of a service dog for PTSD intrigued me, not so much for myself, although perhaps I could benefit from that. As a former dog handler, I was curious about how those dogs were trained. My own experience taught me that dogs could be highly sensitive to their handlers’ state of mind and the environment around them.
Like kismet, I saw a sign for an animal shelter when I changed lanes to get off the interstate to head to Hope. I decided to stop in.
The scent of the shelter reminded me of the kennel the military service dogs lived in when they weren’t with their handlers. It brought back both grief and good memories.
“Hello, can I help you?” A young woman behind the counter asked me. Another middle age woman was filing papers behind her.
“I wanted to find out about adopting a dog.”
She smiled. “Great. We have many dogs. Do you have experience with dogs?”
“I was a dog handler in the military.”
“Wow, that sounds so interesting.”
The middle-aged woman turned to look at me. “Thank you for your service.”
I mustered a smile, wanting to accept the gratitude even though it always annoyed me.
“Is there a type of dog you’re looking for?” The young woman asked.
“It would need to be good with kids. I live along the river, so enjoying the water would be nice.”
“We have a couple of dogs that fit the bill.” The young woman came around the desk, her gray eyes sizing me up appreciatively. She was pretty, and perhaps in another time in my life, if I’d never met Summer, I might have been interested. “Would you like to see them?”
I nodded. I followed her out a side door where there was a line of large cages offering homes to abandoned and unwanted dogs. I was shown a couple of dogs that seemed fine but didn’t really reach out to me.
“Back here we have Maisy. We got her from a kill-shelter where a family had left her when they moved. I don’t know why they didn’t take her, she’s really a great dog. She’s a hound-lab-bully mix.”
I looked into the large cage at the cream-colored dog with the bright eyes. Her head cocked to the side as she looked at me, and then she got up and trotted to me.
“Maisy is the dog I’d bring home if I had space and landlord that would allow it,” the woman said. “She’s sweet and always so happy. She’s leash trained and when we take her for walks, she never tries to run off after squirrels.”
Maisy looked at me and, oddly enough, I thought the dog could see into my soul. I stood there and looked at her without saying anything.
“Do you want to spend some time with her?”
I shrugged, but inside, I really did. “Sure.”
The woman grabbed a leash and then opened the cage. “Come on Maisy.”
Maisy’s tail wagged furiously, but she sat patiently while the woman put the leash on and led her out.
“This is …” the woman looked at me. “I’m sorry, I didn’t get your name.”
“Rafe.”
“Maisy, meet Rafe, Rafe, meet Maisy.”
I held out my hand to let the dog sniff me. Then I squatted down to pet the dog, again looking into its eyes. Generally, it’s not a good idea to look animals eyes, especially dogs, unless you know they don’t view it as aggression, so it was really odd that I felt drawn to her that way.
She butted my hand with her head, seeking more affection.
“I think she likes you.”
“She’s good with kids?” I could already see Emma and Maisy having tea parties and swimming in the river.
“Yes. She’s pretty docile.”
I spent a little more time with Maisy, before checking out a few other dogs.
“So, what do you think?” The young woman asked as we went back to the main building.
“I need to think on it a little bit. Do you do any training here?”
“Like obedience?”
“Yes or service?”
“Not really. We try to make sure the dogs are adoption ready, but that’s about it. Most of our dogs probably aren’t up to service training, but I think they could be trained in basic obedience.” She stepped behind the counter again.
“Do you know of any service trainers around here?”
“Are you looking for a service dog?” The middle-aged woman asked.
“Not necessarily. I was just curious.”
“There are a couple of service training organizations in the state, but none in the area,” the other woman said. “If you’d like, I can give you their information.”
I nodded. “Yes.” I wanted to know more about service training dogs for vets.
“Do you want to fill out the adoption paperwork now? That way if you decide to come back for Maisy, that part will be done.”
I looked at her with an eyebrow quirked. I hadn’t said I was interested in Maisy.
The girl shrugged. “It was clear that of all the dogs, she was the one that captured your interest.”
“Maisy is a lovely dog,” the other woman said.
I went ahead and filled out the paperwork, just in case. It could be they wouldn’t accept me, but if they did, and if I decided on a dog, Maisy seemed like a good choice.
Once I returned home, I turned on my computer and began to research information about service dogs for vets.
11
Summer
There was something seriously wrong with me. I’d just let Rafe fuck me senseless in my office during work hours. If that wasn’t a breach of ethics, as well as a fireable offense, I didn’t know what was. But it was hard to regret it because it was fantastic. I felt sexy and wanton as he bent me forward over my desk and took me from behind.
Beyond sexual satisfaction, I was proud of him for following through and taking counseling seriously. He deserved to have a life filled with love and happiness. For a long time, I’d wanted to be the woman that helped with that. I couldn’t deny that a part of me still wanted that. But now I had Emma to worry about. Before I could tell him about her, I had to be sure he was ready, willing and able to be a father to her.
He has to be told regardless, the social worker part of my brain told me. She was right. But the mother in me was stronger. My first responsibility was to Emma. With him coming to dinner, and spending time with Emma and me, I’d be able to better assess his intentions and plans.
After work, I picked up Emma and we went home.
“Rafe is coming for dinner.”
“Yay. Can we go to the river?”
“Not tonight, baby, but maybe soon.”
“I hope the helicopter doesn’t come. I don’t think he liked that.”
I smiled at her for being so perceptive. “No, I don’t think he did.”
Emma and I put our aprons on and started cooking. I figured spaghetti was safe. Everyone liked spaghetti. I whipped up some sauce with Italian sausage and put the noodles on. Emma helped with the salad and set the table. I also made garlic bread.
A knock on the door interrupted me mid-stir of my sauce. I checked my watch. “He’s early.”
“I’ll get it.” Emma jumped down from her stool and ran to the door. “Uncle Gavin.”
Oh crap. I forced a smile and met Gavin in the living room. “What’s up. Everything okay?”
“Yeah.” He picked up Emma. “Lainey and I wanted to invite this little rugrat over tomorrow for a sleepover.”
I arched a brow.
He shrugged. “Lainey says she wants all the practice she can get before the baby comes.”
“She does know that babies aren’t born as four-year-olds, right? Her experience with Emma isn’t like having a baby.”
“Yeah, but we like having the kid around.”
“Can we make cookies?” Emma asked Gavin.
“Sure thing.”
“Can I do your hair?”
Like Rafe, Gavin had let his hair grow out more since he left the military.
“Men don’t wear hair
stuff.”
Emma pursed her lips. “Yes, they do. Rafe let me do his hair.”
I winced. Gavin looked at me, with one brow arched. “You’ve been spending time with Rafe?”
“He’s my friend too.” I hoped my voice was calm. I knew I’d have to tell Gavin about Rafe if we were going to have a full-fledged relationship, but I didn’t know if that’s what was going to happen. So for now, he didn’t need to know. Besides, I wasn’t ready to have whatever discussion Gavin might want to have about it.
“Since when?” he asked.
“Since for a long time.”
He shook his head. “You’re not…”
He let the statement hang. I didn’t want to lie, but neither did I want to have this conversation.
“What time do you want Emma tomorrow?”
He stared at me for a moment, and then thankfully moved on. “Six? Or whenever is good for you. Lainey can keep her during the next day too if you want. Give Jess some time off.”
“I’ll let her know.”
There was a knock at the door, and my heart skipped in my chest.
“I’ll get it.” Emma squirmed from Gavin’s hold and ran to the door. “Rafe.”
“Hey, Emma.” Rafe smiled at her, and it made my heart full. He looked up, smiled at me, and then his smile faltered. “Gavin.”
“Rafe.” Gavin’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Rafe and then me, and then back at the flowers and stuffed animal in Rafe’s hands. Rafe cleared his throat. “I wanted to thank you for all your help the other day.”
I wondered if Gavin would buy that. “Thank you. Come in.”
“What’s that?” Emma pointed to the stuffed animal.
Rafe squatted down but appeared to keep one eye on Gavin. I couldn’t blame him. “This is a husky. He’s a toy dog that I bet your mom would be okay with you having.”
Emma took him and squeezed it closed her body. “My own doggy.”
“What do you say, Em?” I prodded her.
“Thank you.” She wrapped one arm around Rafe’s neck and gave him a hug. My heart swelled in my chest.