by Lisa Kessler
She walked to the door, consciously placing one foot in front of the other, each step leading her further away from her loss.
Two black dresses were laid across her bed, waiting for her to select the one she would wear to Notre Dame. The sight brought a fresh wave of tears. She dressed quietly, not bothering to wear a corset. Her first black mourning dress had been for her mother, followed by another for her baby brother. Years later, she had found herself in black for her father.
And now Callia.
She had no one left.
With trembling hands, she pinned up her hair and placed the veiled mourning bonnet over her blond curls. Before lowering the veil, she closed her eyes, pulling in a long, slow breath. Centering herself, she opened her eyes and lowered the black veil. She would survive just as she always had.
After the evening vespers concluded, Marguerite wandered behind the main altar of Notre Dame. At the back of the cathedral, she stopped at the Apsidal chapel dedicated to Our Lady of Sorrows. She stared up at Mary’s serene face, wishing for peace and balm for her wounded heart.
Marguerite sighed and moved to the candles. Dropping in her coins, she lit a candle in Callia’s memory before kneeling to pray. While she poured out her pain and worry to God, she sensed someone beside her.
She peered to her right and recognized the open collar, tanned skin, and strong jaw. Turning toward him, she whispered, “How is this possible? You are on hallowed ground in the shadow of the cross.”
On his knees beside her, Kane leaned close to her ear.
“Your religion holds no power over me.” He straightened, but moved in close once more. “I am not a vampire, Rita.”
Hearing the agitation in his voice lifted her heavy spirit for a brief moment.
“What are you doing here?” She whispered without looking at him.
“I came when I heard.” His large hand covered hers. “I am sorry I could not save her for you.”
“I am grateful that you tried.” Marguerite swallowed the lump in her throat. “But why are you here? You are not a believer.”
“You are. I came because…” His voice trailed off until she turned and met his eyes. He reached up under the veil to slide his finger along her jaw. His touch comforted her more than she thought possible. “Because I wanted you to know you are not alone in this world.”
“Thank you.” A tear spilled down her cheek. Marguerite stared into the candle flame.
She bowed her head to pray, and Kane remained at her side in silent support while her world crumbled around her.
When she stood, he offered his arm. Kane guided Rita to an inn and seated her at a table in the corner by the fireplace.
She’d spent the past two weeks tending to her cousin, and he worried. She looked frail. He ordered her a bowl of stew and a glass of wine.
She lifted her veil and pulled it back over her hat while she stared at him. He could almost see her mind working and fought the urge to peer into her thoughts. After she enjoyed a sip of wine, she sat back in her chair. “Tell me how you entered Notre Dame and Antoine could not.”
Annoyance festered inside of him. “Why am I constantly compared to that worthless creature?”
“I am trying to understand who and what you are.”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “I tire of explaining that I am no monster.”
She lifted her glass, swirling the wine. “I did not call you one.”
“You saw me inside the cathedral, kneeling beside you.”
He tried to remind himself that Rita was in mourning, but remembering proved difficult when her needling continued.
“That is not enough for you?”
She swallowed a mouthful of stew and lifted her gaze to meet his. “Why are vampires cursed and Night Walkers are not?”
Kane sat back in his chair, trying not to admire her tenacity. “Humans are not the only intelligent race in this world, Rita. Spirits, demons, and immortals all dwell among you.”
Her spoon hovered over the bowl, suspended for a moment. “I suppose that makes sense.” He waited for the information to sink in and expected more questions, but she finally shook her head and reached for her wine. “Tell me why you can walk where vampires cannot.”
“Vlad started the vampire race by making contact with an immortal spirit that longed for flesh. He believed he sold his soul to the devil, but I will tell you there are many demons who would bargain with a mortal for use of his flesh.”
“So you do not believe the devil himself gave the vampires immortality?” She glanced around the inn keeping her voice low.
“I have never met the devil himself, so I doubt his existence. But the demon that Vlad offered entry into his bloodstream does have an aversion to religious symbols.”
“And you do not.”
The corner of his lip curved into a half smile. “I have no quarrel with a God who offers his people peace.” He reached across the table to take her free hand in his. “Finish your food. I have something to show you.”
He paid for her meal and took her hand, admiring the feel of her warm fingers entwining with his. Outside, Kukulkan pawed at the ground, shaking his head. Rita ran her hand down his neck, and Kane lifted her onto his back before climbing into the saddle behind her. With one arm around her waist, he grasped the reins and turned Kukulkan toward the hills outside of Paris.
When they arrived at the lake, Rita rested against Kane’s chest, and he bent to kiss her hair. Her scent calmed the jaguar inside of him.
“Is this what you wanted to show me?”
Kane dismounted and reached up to help Rita down from his horse. “Not exactly.”
He took her hand and walked her to a grassy area by the water’s edge. They sat down, and her gaze met his. It hurt him to see the pain in her features. “I do wish I could have saved Callia for you.”
Her eyes watered, but she blinked back her tears. “I know. You gave me more time with her.”
He nodded. “Perhaps.” His gaze wandered to the moonlight on the water. “Are you still going to the new world?”
She squeezed his hand, then pulled free from his grasp.
His heart burned like the vampire had staked him all over again.
“I wish I knew. The future I thought I wanted…
Everything has changed.”
Kane stood up and walked to the water, trying to clear his head. He didn’t want her to leave, but could he risk asking her to stay? He’d never felt this strange…insecure. Ever.
“Before you decide anything, there is something I want to share with you.” He turned to face her again. “I knew you would have too many questions. I thought showing you would be better.”
He took a deep breath, calling the energy around him while he welcomed the jaguar spirit to join with his own.
Marguerite frowned, hurrying to her feet. The air around Kane came alive, raising the fine hairs on her arms and neck. She rubbed her eyes, unable to process what she saw.
Kane’s body appeared to melt and shift from a man into a huge golden cat with black spots. The electricity in the air dissipated, leaving her staring at a massive feline with large, sharp teeth.
The cat paced along the water’s edge until it turned and met her gaze. She froze, unable to breathe. It took a silent step toward her. The sleek creature came closer, sniffing at her feet. Marguerite’s heart pounded in her ears, but she fought the urge to run. Somewhere deep inside, she knew this must be Kane. Impossible.
But she’d witnessed him change.
Fearing she might be sinking into hysteria, she reached out with a trembling hand. The cat sat in front of her, brushing its head against her hand. She’d never felt anything so soft and sleek. While it rubbed itself, she noticed he had deep blue eyes.
Kane’s eyes.
Marguerite knelt, face to face with a wild animal that could maul her to death. Perhaps she was closer to insanity than she realized.
Cautiously, she raised her other hand too, and rubbed behi
nd the cat’s ears. “Kane? Is it really you?”
The cat nudged her hands, chuffing air from its nose and mouth in answer. Laughter bubbled from her lips. “You are… Glorious.” She ran her hand down his spine, relishing the softness. “How is this possible?”
The cat froze, his ears twitching. Instinctively, Marguerite followed suit, staying low beside him, her hand steady along his ribs. She scanned the darkness. Movement by the trees caught her attention. Kukulkan nickered, pawing his large hoof into the dirt where he stood tied.
The large cat’s ears flattened, and his lips pulled back to expose formidable fangs. He roared, the sound echoing across the meadow, and Marguerite gasped when a gray wolf stepped out of the forest. The animal swished his tail, but turned and raced into the darkness.
Marguerite heaved a sigh of relief and sat down. “Can you become a man again?”
The cat licked his lips, watching the wolf run, before turning toward her. Sitting close to him, she felt the energy rise in waves from the cat’s large body, the air rippling until his form began to waver, almost liquid. Kane sat beside her fully clothed.
He gestured toward the trees. “Did you see the wolf run away?”
Marguerite did her best not to laugh and nodded. “I did.”
He grinned and shook his head. “Since I came to this country I have not taken the chance to shift outside my home. If a mortal saw a golden jaguar prowling in France, they would hunt it until I would be forced to find a new home.”
“And your clothes…”
Kane glanced down at his shirt and met her eyes again.
“When the animal takes over, we remain frozen within.
Once we regain our form, it is as if time stopped. I wore this before the jaguar took shape, and I am returned to myself in the same condition.”
She stared in wonder at his gorgeous smile, the sparkle in his eyes so full of…life. “Do all of you change into animals?”
“Every Night Walker has a spirit animal inside him. They are a part of us. And for centuries I have kept mine trapped within stone walls.” He stretched, his body rippling with power. “I knew the jaguar would not leave you unprotected, so I could risk shifting.”
“How did you know he would not attack me?”
Kane’s expression softened, his gaze locked on hers.
“Because I love you, Rita.” Her heart pounded. She opened her mouth to speak, but Kane pressed a gentle finger to her lips. “I wanted you to know me completely. No secrets.”
“I…” Her eyes burned with unshed tears. She shook her head, trying to gather her scattered thoughts. “Love will not change who and what we are.”
“I do not care what we are.” Kane took her hand. “My world is better with you in it.”
“For now, but your world is never-ending.” Her voice broke along with her heart. When had she gone from fearing to loving him? And worse yet, if she truly loved him, she couldn’t allow him to watch her fade away day by day, growing closer to a death he would never know.
She lifted his hand to her lips and kissed his fingers. “How will you feel when I am old and gray? Who will comfort you when I am gone?”
Kane stared at her for a moment. Without a word, he got to his feet and walked to the water’s edge. “You believe we would be better off running away than risking love.”
His words tempted her. He loved her, and she loved him.
But he would never be able to save her from time. Age would steal their love, and he would be alone again, and wounded.
Her fault.
The moonlight cast a long shadow of his broad shoulders thinning into a trim waist. She knew every inch of his muscled body, and she ached to go to him, to throw her arms around him and hold him tight.
But she forced herself to stay back. “A lifetime for me is a blink of time for you.”
He spun around. “That is my concern, not yours. It will hurt me more to know you live in this world, and I cannot touch you or hear your voice. Let me love you for whatever time we have together. It will be a cherished gift, not a burden.”
He came to her and knelt down, taking her face in his hands, his gaze demanding hers. “I want you to stay with me.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “Marry me, Rita.”
Warmth and love flooded her body, taking her resolve with it. “I do not wish to make eternity unbearable for you. I never want to hurt you.”
His lips curved into a sexy smile meant for her alone.
Kane cupped her neck, drawing her closer to him until he whispered against her lips, “Then say yes.”
Chapter Twelve
Kane claimed her lips, kissing, caressing, tasting, until she surrendered and returned his affection. His growl in response sent heat firing through her body. Marguerite slid her fingers back into his hair, bringing her arms up around his neck until her breasts pressed tightly against his chest.
His tongue caressed hers, making the rest of her body ache for his attention. How could she walk away? She would regret it for the rest of her life.
Unless.
Her cousin’s words echoed through her mind. You could love without ever having to say goodbye.
Marguerite pulled back from the kiss and whispered, “Make me like you.”
“What?” Kane frowned, taking a step back from her.
Her heart pounded with fear and…hope. “Vampires can make others. Make me a Night Walker like you.”
He looked stunned. She waited for him to answer. Finally, he took her hand, his thumb brushing over her knuckles.
“You do not understand what you are asking. You sat by and watched death come for your cousin. It is understandable that you would wish to escape the same fate.”
She yanked her hand free of his. Her fingers balled into fists at her sides.
“I may have lost my beautiful Callia, but I am not some weak-minded woman for you to coddle.” She huffed, shaking her head. “I am well aware of what I am asking. My cousin was my last tie to this world. Is it wrong that I wish to join yours? I would think you might be happy.”
“I love you as you are.” He started toward his horse. “I would not wish for you to give up your life without thinking it through.” Kane stopped and turned. “I heard you telling Antoine you did not fear growing old. He offered you immortality, and you shunned the inhumanity.”
“But now I have seen the inhumanity of death.”
He sighed and shook his head. “I will not lie to you, knowing that death would not steal you from my arms would comfort me, but for that reason, we should wait. Think this over, Rita.”
She bit back the urge to fight him. Now that she had made the decision, she wanted to act before she changed her mind.
Exactly the reason Kane wanted to wait.
She rolled her eyes at herself. “How long do we wait?”
“Mourn your cousin.” He lifted her up onto the saddle and climbed up behind her. He wrapped one strong arm around her waist, and his lips brushed her ear. “Take time to consider your choice. There is no going back.”
He launched his horse into a gallop before she pressed any further. Marguerite closed her eyes, replaying the evening in her mind. The pain of losing her cousin, the shock and disbelief of seeing Kane, first inside Notre Dame and then as a jungle cat, and the joy at hearing Kane profess his love for her all rattled in her mind with warring emotions.
Had she ever answered his proposal?
When they reached the stable, Kane jumped down and helped her down from the saddle. She stared up into his eyes, fatigue weighing on her shoulders. “I never gave you my answer.”
He bent to kiss her lips, tender, slow, and soft. “I will ask again. Later.”
“How much later?” She whispered into the kiss.
He swept her off her feet and into his arms. “Later.”
Marguerite slid her arms around his neck, kissing the exposed flesh of his tanned chest. He should never button his shirts. When her lips reached the base of his neck, Kane’s voice rumbled de
ep in his chest. “You are a dangerous temptation.”
She hummed against his skin, her lips curving, enjoying the knowledge that her touch affected him. Warmth filled her in spite of her exhaustion and the weight of sadness for Callia. His affection and support gave her strength.
Kane carried her into her room, laying her on the feather bed. “Rest well…”
She managed a drowsy smile. “You as well, mon amour.”
His lips caressed her forehead, and he walked out.
The moment the sun dipped below the horizon, Kane’s chest pulled in a breath. His heart picked up a rhythm, and he blinked open his eyes. A warmth grew inside of him. Instead of hunting the dark alleyways of Paris for Antoine or some other dreg seeking to harm others, he would be spending the evening with Rita.
Being lonely without her company since the night at the lake shocked him. He’d been alone and satisfied for centuries, but her love changed everything. It made a few days seem like months. He wanted to make her laugh, to touch her, to listen to her tell him about her activities during the day.
Those comforts had to wait.
For days, he’d hunted Antoine. Until the vampire was dead, he couldn’t be certain of Rita’s safety. But his search had been fruitless. Even reading the thoughts of mortals, he found no trace of the vampire or anyone who had seen him since the fire.
Kane was beginning to think the vampire had left Paris.
Good.
Making his way up from his daylight sanctuary, he found his black pants and jacket already awaiting him, laid out on his feather bed. Gerard also left a tie with the white shirt.
Kane shook his head with a smirk. Gerard never lost hope that he would turn his master into a proper gentleman.
Tossing the tie aside, he dressed and pulled his hair back, tying it at the nape of his neck.
Rita had been busy in his absence. As Antoine Berjon’s assistant, the art community looked to her to make the burial arrangements after the fire. She used what remained of his wealth to make a donation in his name to the École des Beaux-Arts University where he used to train young artists while he was mortal.