by M. Garzon
“Hello, Téa.” Aunt Paloma gave me a sorrowful look and I felt a hot stab of guilt mixed with sadness.
“Hi,” I greeted her quietly. “I’m glad you’re feeling better.” I’d overheard that much of the conversation.
“Thank you,” she said politely.
“Are you coming out to the barn?” Jaden asked.
“Sure.” We headed to the door but were stopped by the sound of Aunt Paloma’s voice.
“You’re going together?” she asked in disbelief.
“They’re just walking together,” Dec said soothingly. “There are people in the barn. They won’t be alone.”
“How do you know they won’t just sneak off somewhere?” she insisted. I hung my head, thinking that she was more right than she knew.
“Paloma, how do you plan to keep them apart? Jaden’s horses are here. He has to be in the barn sometimes,” Dec said.
“Then his horses should move!” She gave Jaden an angry glare before turning on Dec. “You are enabling them by not stopping this. You are making them mistakenly believe that this travesty is somehow acceptable in normal, decent society.”
“All right, mom, I’ll stay in the house,” Jaden said. He looked lost in no-man’s land between anger and concern.
Aunt Paloma’s brown eyes met mine. “It’s not just today. If you insist on being together, then what? Do you know what your lives will be like? People will ask innocent questions, like ‘how did you meet?’, and what will you do, lie? Everyone around you will know that you’re involved with your cousin. You’ll be branded as strange at best, or at worst, perverse. Your entire relationship will be tainted by the scandal of it. That’s no way to start a life.” Bright red spots stood out against her pale cheeks.
I whirled and left the house. I couldn’t argue with Aunt Paloma, not in her condition, and in any case, I didn’t know what I could say. I loved Jaden beyond reason, but for the first time, I questioned whether I should have followed the dictates of reason rather than my heart when I decided to be with him.
I didn’t even notice making my way to the barn, and once inside I hesitated. In the old days, I would have gone to Blaze’s stall for comfort, or maybe Zac’s. But Blaze was gone forever, and Zac had been moved out a few months earlier by his new owner, which had been a relief in a way. But now I found myself without a friendly neck to hug. Hades and I didn’t have that kind of relationship, at least not yet, and Cal was too... well, let’s just say I didn’t feel drawn to Cal in times of need.
I saw the wheelbarrow in front of Winter’s stall and ventured over. I stepped just inside and leaned my back against the wall.
Alan paused in his cleaning and leaned on his pitchfork. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” he asked, his eyes twinkling.
I ran my finger around the silver bracelet on my wrist, the one Jaden had bought me in Florida.
“I was just wondering... is there any talk in the barn that I should know about?”
“There’s always talk.” He chuckled. “I don’t pay it any mind.”
I knew that much was true. It was one of the reasons Dec valued Alan so highly — he didn’t gossip.
“What about when I went to Florida to help Jaden?” I said carefully. “Was there talk then?”
Alan considered me for a minute. I was almost sure he knew what I was getting at, and I strongly suspected he knew about Jaden and me.
“Mostly, people said that it was about time you got to go someplace warm and that it was a shame you weren’t bringing a horse to ride.”
I looked at him in surprise.
“The people in this barn love you, honey. You’re like family.” He patted my shoulder.
Family. It was true that we were close with many of the people at our barn. But were they the kind of family who would judge me harshly for being with Jaden? Or for that matter, for wanting to find my natural father? I felt myself deflate. I just didn’t know anymore, and I didn’t feel like I could take much more anger and disapproval. Winter ambled over and rested his head against me, and I put my arms around him gratefully. At least I’d found a horse to hug.
Jaden found me not long afterward. We went up to the arena’s viewing lounge, since it wasn’t often used during warm weather, and sat on the battered old couch.
“I’m surprised your mom let you out,” I commented.
“She’s calmed down now. Sometimes I think all those treatments take a toll on her mental state, as well.”
And we’re not helping, I thought sadly. “How’s she doing?”
“Better. She’s referred some of her patients to another psychologist, and she hired someone to manage the office. That’s why she came today, she needs Dec’s help with the paperwork.”
She’d come to the right place, then. When it came to running a business, Dec could tell you everything from the legal aspects, to the forms you’d need, to how to organize it. He was in demand as a consultant but he hadn’t taken any contracts recently because the barn had been busy.
I looked into Jaden’s eyes, but my voice wouldn’t go much over a whisper. “Do you believe her, about our lives always being tainted by scandal?”
He took my hand before smiling gently at me. “No, querida. I believe our lives together will be wonderful.”
* * *
A few days later Seth leaned against the doorjamb of my bedroom. “We’ll have to ask Dec to feed on Sunday morning,” he reminded me, “since we’re staying over at Julia’s.”
Julia was having a graduation party that weekend, and after missing prom, I knew there was no way I was getting out of it. Her parents were renting a room at a restaurant and hiring a DJ, and she’d invited over fifty people.
Dec came down the hall, frowning. “Did I hear you say you’re sleeping at Julia’s?” He looked Seth in the eye. “Where?”
Poor Seth. He was an open book to start with, and his fair skin made his emotions impossible to conceal. He couldn’t even pretend to misunderstand; his blooming cheeks were answer enough for Dec.
“Absolutely not,” Dec said sharply.
“But the Yamamotos don’t mind!” Seth insisted.
“Well, I do,” Dec said.
“Why?”
“Because I didn’t raise you to be the kind of man who disrespects a girl — or her parents — enough to sleep with her in her parent’s house!” Dec thundered.
“Téa went to Florida with Jaden!” Seth yelled. “Do you think they were in separate bedrooms?”
“Way to throw me under a bus, Seth,” I said wryly.
I tensed as Dec turned on me. “Did you and Jaden... in this house-”
“No!” I exclaimed. “Of course not!” I mentally thanked Jaden for having the foresight to make my protest true.
I hazarded a look at Seth. He was staring at his feet, his face still tinted red.
“Dec, I’m sure Seth can sleep in another room. We’re not the only ones staying at Julia’s. Teri and Kabir will be there too, and probably loads of other people.”
Dec looked surprised. “Kabir’s parents are letting him stay in the city overnight?”
It was something of a surprise. Kabir’s parents were Indian and very strict about his comings and goings.
“What about Jaden?” Dec asked.
“What about him?”
“Is he going to this party?”
“No,” I said, “just high school kids.”
“Hmph.” Dec strode off. He was back a minute later, holding the phone to his ear.
“Hi, son. Can you stay here overnight on Saturday? Maybe teach a few classes on Sunday morning?” A pause while he listened. “Okay, great. See you then.”
He hung up before meeting my eyes. “All right, you can go. And I’ll have a word with the Yamamotos about Seth’s sleeping arrangements.”
Seth shot Dec an inexplicably angry look, but my mind was on other things.
“Dec, you can’t have Jaden teach my lessons!”
“Why not?”
“He’s a polo playe
r!” I protested.
“It’ll be fine,” Dec said dismissively. “Probably make a nice change for the students.”
Maybe it would, though I suspected that if Jaden taught them, the teenage girls who rode Sunday mornings would be hyperventilating too hard to hear a word he’d say.
* * *
When Julia came to ride Jasmine the next day the party was all she could talk about.
“What are you wearing?” she asked me excitedly.
“I don’t know, I haven’t thought about it.”
“Téa,” she said impatiently, “these things take planning!”
“You know, not every outfit has to scream ‘look at me’ all the time,” I said.
She cast me a dubious look but let that one pass. “You’ve been under a lot of stress with this natural father thing,” she said, as though my scant interest in fashion was a new and inexplicable symptom, rather than a long-standing source of irritation for her. “We’ll go through your closet as soon as we’re done here.”
Julia despaired over the lack of party dresses in my wardrobe, but she finally settled on a stretchy charcoal skirt and a slinky cranberry top that I had bought in Florida. I slipped them on after showering on Saturday night and almost ran into Seth when I dashed into the hall.
“You look great,” I said. “Where’d you get those pants?” He was wearing dark denim pants with a complicated stitching pattern and asymmetrical pockets. They looked too fancy to be called jeans.
He grinned. “A gift from Jules. Guess she doesn’t trust me to dress myself.”
“She doesn’t trust any of us.” I laughed as we headed downstairs.
Dec’s eyebrows went up when he caught sight of us. He was in the living room watching TV — not something he indulged in very often.
“You both look very... good. Very well dressed.” He cleared his throat. “Is there going to be any drinking at this party?”
Probably. “Don’t worry, Dec, Julia’s parents will be there the whole time.” No need to mention that her parents didn’t tend to worry about things like underage drinking.
Seth drove to Oakville. We were a bit late since we’d had to work all day, and the room was already crowded. There were tables scattered around a small dance floor and pop music was blaring. Teri spotted us first and hurried over to hug us. She was wearing a figure-hugging, light green dress that matched her eyes and showcased her small waist.
“Quite the turnout,” Seth commented, scanning the room.
I’d expected most of the party-goers to be girls since Julia went to a private girls’ school, but there seemed to be an even mix. Teri showed us to the table where she’d been sitting with Kabir, who got up and engulfed me in a hug. He was so hugely muscled that you’d expect his hugs to be bone-crushing, but he was surprisingly gentle. Seth went to find Julia while I sat down.
“I can’t believe high school is finally over,” Kabir said. “Are you pumped about next year?”
“Yeah, I feel like our lives are finally starting,” Teri enthused. “Someday soon I’ll actually be able to move out of my parents’ house.” She grinned, apparently savoring the thought. They looked at me.
“I don’t think that much will change for me, really.” The main focus of my life had always been the barn, not school.
“Hey, guys!” Julia bounced up to us, and I got up to give her a hug. “Where’s Seth?” She looked around the room. Her long dark hair hung like heavy silk and seemed to flow into her simple black dress. She was movie-star beautiful.
“He went to look for you,” I started to say, but stopped as I followed Julia’s steely gaze. Seth was standing with one shoulder against the wall, talking to a long-haired blond girl I didn’t recognize. They were both smiling.
“Why’s he talking to her? Does he even know her?” Julia asked, her voice taut.
“Sure he does. She rides, remember?” Teri was looking askance at Julia.
“He could at least say hello to me before he starts talking to other girls,” Julia fumed. Her hands were clenched by her sides.
“Oh come on, Jules, you know Seth — he’s friendly. He was walking around looking for you and he ran into someone he knew. Big deal.” Teri was frowning now.
Kabir and I exchanged a look.
“There’s such a thing as being too friendly,” Julia declared. She strode over to Seth. Once there, she slipped her arm through his and smiled charmingly at the blond girl. Seth kissed the top of her head, oblivious to any strain.
“Trouble in paradise?” Kabir asked me.
I shrugged. There was no further sign of trouble as the night wore on, and in the end, I was glad I’d come. I’d forgotten how much fun it was to celebrate with my closest friends. I drove to Julia’s house afterward, since Seth had had a few drinks, and we laughed and talked some more in the basement rec room before splitting up to go to bed. Seth stayed in the basement with Kabir, while Teri and I went to Julia’s room.
“Do you think Seth would ever cheat on me?” Julia asked when we were lying in the dark.
“Is this because he talked to another girl tonight?” Teri asked.
“I don’t know, I’m just wondering,” Julia said in a small voice.
“You know he wouldn’t,” I said quietly. “He loves you.”
I was stunned by her question. It had often seemed to me that Julia led the perfect life — two parents who loved her, enough money for a nice horse and regular vacations, stunning beauty, and an effervescent personality. There were times I’d had to struggle not to be envious of my friend. She’d never shown evidence of this kind of insecurity before, but then, she’d never been in love before. Maybe, for the first time, she felt as though she had something to lose. I found her hand in the darkness and squeezed it. I knew the feeling.
* * *
With school officially over I could look forward to summer. I had a talented jumper to ride without the financial stress of campaigning one. I had a promising young horse of my own to figure out. And most of all, I had Jaden.
On Monday morning he intercepted me in the kitchen as I was on my way out to the barn.
“The school horses have the day off. It’s supposed to be a day of rest, and yet you always end up riding, and turning horses out, and somehow still filling your day with work. You need some down time. Go out, have some fun. Call one of your friends,” he said.
I gave him a doubtful look. “The school horses still need to be turned out.”
“Seth and I can take care of that.” He tossed me something; I caught it automatically and held it up. My eyes went back to his face, startled.
“Your car keys?”
“Take it.”
Seth’s eyes were popping out of his head; he seemed to be trying to speak but no words were emerging. He finally managed after several tries.
“But... but... you’re letting her take your car?”
Jaden shrugged. “Sure, why not?”
“I’ll tell you why not — she’s a speed freak, did you know that?”
“I am aware of that, in fact.” Jaden’s eyes never left mine; he was smiling softly.
“Jealous, little brother?” I teased, finally tearing my gaze away from Jaden.
“You know I am,” Seth admitted, grinning.
I bounded upstairs to get changed and make some calls. When I headed outside the boys were standing by Jaden’s car, and I had to smile at the obvious lust in Seth’s eyes.
“You never told me what made you get the FX50,” he was saying.
“It was the closest thing I could get to a sports car that would hold all my polo gear,” Jaden replied.
I bounced to a stop between them.
“Okay, Peter and Chip haven’t been getting along lately, so don’t turn them out together. Oh, and don’t forget you can’t leave Cal’s halter on. And...”
I realized that Jaden wasn’t really listening, although he did seem to appreciate the skirt and tank top ensemble I had changed into.
Seth c
huckled. “Don’t worry, Sis, I’ve got the barn under control. You just take care of these three hundred and ninety horses,” he sighed, giving the car a pat.
I went shopping with Julia in the morning, and when Teri finished her morning’s work at the racetrack we all went to the beach. It was the kind of relaxing day that I almost never had, I realized as I was driving home. Maybe that was why Dec was such a workaholic, I mused — he probably hadn’t had many days off while growing up, either. I sometimes wondered if Dec had really wanted to return to the family business when it became too much for Gran. He was the best qualified of the three siblings, but he had left behind a successful career in order to help Gran keep the barn. Then again, in our clan, duty to family was expected, and he probably hadn’t felt as though he had a choice. When he married my mom Gran had moved to the outskirts of Julien, the tiny town nearest to us, and Seth and I had devoted ourselves to learning about the equine world, thus doing our share of familial duty.
Stephanie, one of our boarders, caught us all by surprise the next day when she announced that she planned to breed her mare, Gracie.
“We haven’t had a foal here in a long time,” Dec said when Stephanie told us. “We’re not really set up for it.”
“We could make a foaling stall without too much trouble, though. We just have to take out the partition between two stalls,” I pointed out.
A bigger stall was necessary because the foal would need to live with its mother for about six months. I was excited at the prospect of a baby in the barn. I’d known lots of foals before, and even witnessed a birth when I was on foaling watch at a neighboring stable, but we’d never seen one grow up from birth on our property.
“And they could be turned out in the grass paddock,” Seth added.
Dec nodded thoughtfully. Stephanie had been with us for years, and we wanted to keep her. Once Dec had agreed to make arrangements we nearly skipped out to the barn.
“A baby!” Julia trilled at the news. “Oh, I can’t wait! Have you picked a sire yet?”
“I’ve narrowed it down.” Stephanie pulled out her phone and showed us a picture. “Here’s the first one, isn’t he gorgeous?”
The stallion was an imperious-looking black, but when Teri took the phone she shook her head.