by Leslie North
She blinked in astonishment. And just like that…she was back in. “Uh…yeah.”
He grinned, reaching for his phone again. “You’re a life saver, you know that?”
“You’re not so bad yourself.”
“Just no more office videos. You don’t want to get fired a second time.”
“Not even cat videos? I have a whole library of cat videos that I’ve been dying to share.” She couldn’t help teasing him.
Brian smirked at her before he got dressed slowly, pausing to text whoever was on the other end of the phone. Once he was finally back in those sexy dark slacks and pale button-up, desperation swarmed her. She didn’t want to lose his warmth or laughter. She wanted him to stay here. Stay the night. Stay as long as he could.
“Are you sure you have to leave?” She burrowed under the covers, suddenly chilled. “I think we forgot a few items on the to-do list. You better stick around so we can get to them.”
He laughed, but the answer was already written in the air between them. “I can’t. I promised to meet up with Felicia for dinner.”
Felicia. The cold water to douse the sweet and sexy flames they’d fanned between them. She tried not to let the disappointment show. But it was hard. It was so damn hard.
“Okay.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “Well, I’m glad you came over. It was nice. Bye.”
Brian watched her for a long moment, then he came over to the bed. He pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead and squeezed her shoulder through the comforter.
“We’ll talk later,” he said, which gave no indication if that meant talk about us or talk about what a creepy robot Felicia is or talk about how much I love fucking you. All of the possibilities swirled inside her.
And then he left. Connie listened to his footsteps disappearing until the front door clicked shut. Silence bore down around her, ears buzzing as she relived their sex, their laughter, and the fact that at the end of it all, he’d left to go home to Felicia.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
She’d messed up by sleeping with him in the first place. But it had been simpler then—he’d been unattached. And now? She was sleeping with a taken man. Even if he and his business bitch were together on paper only, it didn’t matter. It was a quagmire. One that was already bad enough with the existence of his bastard child and enough non-disclosure agreements to make a celebrity weep.
Why not just add a little bit of genuine emotion onto the trash heap and run with it?
Connie stayed in her bed, tossing and turning and ruminating, for what felt like hours. By the time her rumbling stomach finally drove her from bed, it was after eight p.m. Exhausted both from the awesome sex and not-so-awesome mental jumping jacks, she tottered into the kitchen to find some leftovers.
As she reheated some day-old Chinese food, she ran through the current predicament in her head for the billionth time.
You like Brian. Brian got you pregnant. Brian will never choose you.
Three different parts of the same equation, and it all felt like a zero-sum game. Connie suspected that the fact that she felt a connection—and that Brian very likely felt it too—was largely irrelevant to him.
And that’s when it hit her.
She held the cards when it came to the baby.
But when it came to pursuing Brian, to finding anything meaningful or deep or lasting?
There were no cards to be held at all.
12
Brian drew a deep breath as he waited for the new client to exit the restroom. He’d been doing the standard tour of the facility, though for this guy—a Mr. Jansen Oliffson—it was more of a courtesy. They’d already signed the paperwork. Oliffson Enterprises was now a formal partner of O Developments.
Brian tried to hang onto the sense of accomplishment before it wisped away. It was getting harder to savor the triumph these days. And hell if he knew why. It seemed the closer the clock ticked toward Connie’s due date, the less he could think about anything else.
She’d been back at O Developments part time, as promised, for a little over two weeks. He’d made a point not to return to her apartment and kept his check-in texts to a bare minimum. Only because every part of him craved her, nearly constantly. Now that she was in the building, he had to make do with the occasional glimpses. It had to be enough. Because if he let himself get too much of her…
He didn’t want to consider what uprooting the deal would look like. The deal they themselves had inked and signed just last month. There was no future with Connie—there couldn’t be. Because Connie didn’t equal Felicia on paper. And he needed Felicia and her company to reach his billion dollar goal.
He hated how much he was tempted to imagine otherwise, though.
The men’s restroom door opened, and Jansen strolled out, a satisfied smile on his face. “Shall we?”
Brian forced a smile, leading the way down the halls. He’d done this a thousand times before. Each client showed the same empty interest as they wound through the same immaculate corridors of his business, said hello to the same highly paid developers, then made their way slowly toward the gleaming entrance so Brian could say farewell and then count his money.
Except today was different. Today, Connie would be in the path of the tour. And no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t pretend he wasn’t looking forward to it.
Brian ran through the usual song and dance as he introduced Jansen to the various parts of the building. When they came up on the development area, Brian pushed through the doors quickly. The bright room was bustling with developers on computers, huddled in quietly conversing groups, or simply pacing the far wall, squeezing stress balls. San Diego glittered through the wall-to-wall windows. Brian grinned, his gaze immediately landing on Connie.
He could only see the top half of her face and a sweep of black hair over the divider wall in front of her computer. Even so, he could see the smile in her eyes.
“This is our development area,” Brian said, unable to rip his gaze off Connie. He started walking that way, almost on auto-pilot. As though his legs would take him there, even if his rational mind wouldn’t.
“Connie,” Brian said as he came up to her desk. “I’d like you to meet Jansen. He’s recently become a part of the O Development family.”
“Pleased to meet you,” Connie said, coming to her feet. She hid her growing belly under flowing black tops, so it was hard to really know she was pregnant unless a coworker had the balls to ask. Most people chose not to make an ass of themselves, she’d reported a week ago. She extended a hand, which Jansen took in his own.
“The pleasure is all mine,” Jansen said, a distinctively husky tone to his voice. Brian turned, looking quizzically at his guest. Jansen’s eyes were laser-focused on Connie.
“Connie is a part-time developer here, but she does excellent work. An invaluable asset to the team.” Brian watched as Jansen’s smile widened. Connie looked nervously between the two of them.
“You have the most stunning eyes,” Jansen said in a slightly lower voice.
“Thanks. I get that a lot,” Connie said with a nervous laugh. “Luck of the draw, I guess.”
“It’s still uncommon to see many women in development,” Jansen said. “At least where I’m from. What a pleasure to see someone as fine as you on the team.” He laughed suddenly. “Excuse me! I meant fine, as…” He waved his hand. “English isn’t my first language.”
“Oh? What other language do you speak?” The high note in Connie’s voice told Brian she was curious. Surprised, maybe. Brian’s eyes narrowed as Jansen stepped closer.
“I speak Swedish,” he said, drawing out the vowel. “And French. And German.”
“Good lord,” Connie said, her cheeks flushed. She fanned herself, though he couldn’t imagine why. Those were all ugly languages, save French. Something inside him pitched to his feet. She’s not actually attracted to this guy right?
Jansen was a run-of-the-mill northern European guy. Blond. Big teeth. Av
erage height. Brian frowned as he assessed him, missing parts of their continued conversation. When he finally tuned in again, Jansen was saying a long string of something in German.
“Now what was that?” Connie asked, laughing.
“I said, ‘We’re all stories in the end. Just make it a good one.’”
Connie gasped, covering her mouth. “Shut up.”
Brian blinked a few times. Just as he was about to ask her what the hell was going on, she squealed. “That’s a Doctor Who quote!”
Jansen’s smile was so wide it might as well have reached the ocean. “That it is, my dear. Season five. Are you a Whovian as well?”
Brian wilted. “Okay. Okay. Jansen, we need to move along.” He sent a grimace to Connie, who gave him an apologetic look in return. She sank back into her chair, waving at Jansen.
“Nice to meet you, Jansen,” Connie chirped. Jansen waved over his shoulder at her as Brian ushered him out of the developer’s area. After they’d burst through the doors, Jansen dared ask the question that Brian had been dreading.
“Wow. She’s a special one. You think I could get her information?”
Disgust traveled through him, along with the heat of jealousy. He gritted his teeth, steeling himself against the response that wanted to come out: No, you cannot. She’s mine. Stay away.
“I’m not quite sure that would be appropriate,” he finally said, cutting the tour short. He took the quick path to the front of the building, pointing out a test room along the way, and dumped him at the receptionist’s office with a hand shake and the fakest smile of his life.
He didn’t care. The deal was done, and Brian needed to go lick his wounds. He stormed back to his office, unable to think of anything other than the way that man had looked at Connie. His Connie.
Brian slammed the door shut behind him, harder than he’d intended. He paced the wall of windows for a few moments until his heart stopped beating so quickly. Running his hand through his hair, he faced the facts.
He was jealous. Badly. And he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.
This whole stupid plan was his idea. He’d signed it into action, and this was what he was left with. Fending off potential suitors by kicking them out of the building. Keeping Connie near just to look at her, but not do anything with her.
The whole thing was messed up.
He sighed loudly, sinking into his desk chair. He clicked mindlessly through screens without really seeing anything, trying to get his mind to stop racing.
Connie was single, and he was basically betrothed. He had no claim on her. He had no right to feel this way.
Brian snatched up his phone, dialing the numbers for his best friend, Nicholas. The two of them frequently called each other in times of life’s greatest challenges. And this qualified as a great challenge.
Nicholas picked up on the third ring, his voice coming through crystal clear. He was probably at the office, just like Brian. “Helloooo, buddy.”
Brian relaxed a little at the sound of his voice. At least he could count on his friend to be there. “Hey Nick. You got a second?”
“All the seconds you need.” A chair creaked through the phone. “I was just procrastinating finalizing this agenda anyway. Whatcha got for me?”
Brian wilted. The two of them had been friends since birth, practically. They’d come from the same neighborhood, confronted similar obstacles, and come out with the same triumphs. Nick had his own multi-million dollar business. They were practically brothers.
Still, he hadn’t told him about Connie yet. He hadn’t quite made up his mind whether to admit it. It went against his own damn contract…but at this point, he needed to confide in someone.
“Listen.” Brian rubbed at his face. “This can’t leave our circle.” Their circle being him, Nick, and Donovan, the third in their friend group since childhood.
“Promise,” Nick said.
“I’m going to be a father.”
The silence on the phone nearly crippled him. Finally, Nick said, “You’ve gotta be shittin’ me.”
None of the fanfare that one might expect…because that wasn’t how these guys rolled. Nick knew as well as anyone that Brian hadn’t planned for a family. Not yet, at least. And not without hitting all the right milestones in the right order first.
With a deep breath, Brian explained the story as quickly as possible. The hook-up with Connie. The decisions about her pregnancy. The pending business moves with Felicia. It felt good to get it all out. But then the big question came:
“So what should I do? She’s not just my employee anymore. I…want to be with her.”
Nick sighed heavily through the phone and was quiet for a long time. Finally, he said, “You know what you do?”
“What?”
“You forget about her.”
Brian blinked, a shaky breath escaping him. It wasn’t what he wanted to hear. It was what he needed to hear. “You mean Connie.”
“Yeah. Forget her. That’s not the goal. Remember the goal, Brian. Keep your eyes on the prize. How the hell are you gonna get to a billion if you stop to focus on something like this?”
Slowly, the clarity returned to him. His best friend was right. This was why he’d called.
“Be with her if you must,” Nick went on. “But you choose her, and you lose the rest of it. It’s as simple as that. And you worked too damn hard to let it all go just for…what? Because you like somebody? Come on. We’re not in high school anymore.”
Brian nodded, though his friend couldn’t see him. He clicked the cap of a pen endlessly as he mulled over his friend’s advice. It stung. He couldn’t lie. “Yeah. You’re right.”
“You’ll remember why this is best in a year when you’re wiping your ass with hundreds.” Nick laughed. “Trust me. We’re all getting there. And the only way we get there is by supporting each other. I love you, brother. I’m not gonna let you slide away from your goal like this.”
Brian rubbed at his forehead. Now he just felt silly. The lapse of judgment was embarrassing. How had he even gotten to this point?
“Thanks, brother. I appreciate the help.” The two friends chatted a bit more before hanging up, and Brian let the silence of his office swallow him.
Nick was right. Everything he’d said had been right.
So why did it still feel wrong?
13
A week later, Brian had completely shed all the vestiges of weakness around his feelings for Connie. He was practicing being harder around the edges, more focused. He’d reduced his texts to Connie to one per week, scheduled for Mondays after lunch. It just made sense—keep it formal, distant, and professional. Connie didn’t reach out to him for much, and it seemed they’d found a new norm.
A new, boring, uneventful norm.
Just as he wanted.
He and Felicia were preparing for a meeting with a potential client in the board room. They’d been practicing for this for weeks. This was scheduled to be the big reveal of her new AI programs, which Brian’s developers had personally been assisting with. Sort of like the informal merging of their assets before the actual marriage—and acquisition—took place. Letting their kids play together, in a sense, before they became siblings.
Felicia shuffled through her papers in the board room, her face stony. She’d been distant and short with him over the last few weeks, but he knew it was because of this exact presentation. He had faith that she’d loosen up once this was over.
Not like he could do anything to help her loosen up. He’d been entirely averse to sex with her since that night at Connie’s house. Since before that, even. Luckily, their mostly-long-distance relationship didn’t allow for much intimacy. And the last few weeks had been burdened with prepping for this meeting. Maybe she didn’t know how little he wanted to take her to bed. That he didn’t really want to take her to bed ever again.
Brian’s phone buzzed. It was a text from Connie. He stopped breathing as he read it.
“Just wanted to let you
know, I’m not feeling super well today. I’m heading to the doctor’s to get checked out. They had me come in for an emergency appointment.”
Emergency appointment. That didn’t sound good. The words rang through his head, prompting plenty of worries and speculation.
“Brian? Did you hear me?” Felicia’s voice cut through the chatter of his thoughts. He blinked, snapping his gaze up to meet hers.
“I’m sorry?”
She sighed tersely. “I asked if you had the P&L.” She shook her head, jaw working back and forth. “You need to get your head in the game. Come on.”
Her tone was an indictment, but he couldn’t argue with her. He did need to get his head in the game. He tapped out a fast response: “Keep me updated.”
Over the next half hour, they finalized the details of their presentation, and then they waited. If the presentation today went well…this would be the deal to push him over the billion-dollar mark. Of course, his company’s acquisition of Felicia’s would still need to be finalized, but those were just small details. If this foreign client liked what they saw and wanted to see this record-breaking, cutting-edge AI technology of theirs, they’d only be able to do it by signing on with Brian and Felicia’s joint company.
In all his years of wheeling, dealing, and presenting, he knew this deal was a sure bet. It had to be. For what Felicia was bringing to the table with all the checks and balances put forth by his own team…they were in. At this point, he just saw the meeting as a formality.
Even so, when the Hakuru Corporation representatives showed up, Brian couldn’t rid himself of the knot of apprehension. With his mind still distantly fixed on Connie, he could only assume it was worries about her getting in the way of his job. Which was precisely what he needed to eradicate.
While the board room was full of stiff introductions and glazed-over grins, Brian’s phone buzzed.