by Sofie Hern
“The coffee is fine,” I say and she walks away.
I come across an article which has Ken’s picture on it and I start to read.
Sorensen was taken into custody the morning of January 6th and is accused of running a life insurance scam. According to police, Sorensen made his money by selling bogus life insurance policies to low-income families and then filing those claims after killing his victims. It is believed that Sorensen’s wife, Julia was the one to bring him to justice.
Along with Mr. Sorensen, four of his alleged accomplices were also arrested, Eugene and Ralph Sorensen along with Christopher Poole. The fourth accomplice, Julia Sorensen, and her husband are being held without bond. It is believed that there are more than thirty victims and authorities are urging other possible victims to come forward.
It feels like I’m reading a novel. How can I have missed it? I shake my head. My own sister was part of a horrible, deadly clan.
I finish the coffee and the waitress gives me a refill. She smiles and walks away. I put the paper away when my phone rings; it’s Colin's father who tells me that Colin has been taken to the funeral home. He flew in overnight and I know I have to step aside and let him take over. He thanks me for all I did for his son and tells me that the funeral is scheduled for sometime next week.
I know my job here is done and need to return to LA to be there for my little brother. It’s just me and Jaycob now and we have a lot of healing and rebuilding to do. We’d have to start by bringing Aaron home to his mom and go from there.
I take a ten-dollar bill from my wallet; put it on the table and leave.
–
I walk to my car and my phone rings. It’s Rita.
“Hey!” She sounds cheerful. “I'm at your house waiting for the wonderful breakfast casserole I heard so much about.”
I hit my forehead with my palm. I totally forgot about our breakfast date. The dashboard clock reads 10:12 a.m.
“I'm heading there now, can you wait for me?”
“Of course I can.”
I smile and tell her, “See you in ten minutes!”
46
RITA
She doesn't see Jaycob’s truck, but gets out anyway. When Adam doesn’t answer the door, she calls him and jokes that she’s waiting for breakfast and he tells her that he’s on his way.
She sits on the bench in the porch to wait for him. The yard is no longer as beautiful as it was when Tianna and her mom were alive.
As promised, Adam arrives ten minutes later. She greets him with a hug then he invites her in.
–
She sits on the sofa and Adam puts his keys on the table, then goes to sit next to her. He sinks into the sofa and rests his head back. She scoots closer and wraps her arms around his ribs. She feels safe with him and is glad to be with someone who understands.
“I know we need to talk about us, but I don't know if this is the best time,” she says as she rests her head on his chest and closes her eyes. “Your heart sounds so sad,” she tells him.
Adam starts to stroke her hair gently and takes a deep breath.
“What are we doing, Rita?” he asks quietly and she wishes to have an answer.
She sighs and looks up at him. “I don't know.”
He kisses the tip of her nose and her heart skips a beat as he looks in her eyes. She caresses his cheek and kisses his lips.
Rita sits in his lap and he holds her face in his hands and softly kisses her lips. She wraps her arms around his ribs and rests her head on his chest, closes her eyes and listens to the beat of his heart.
The man she loves is broken and she’s sad that she doesn’t know what to do to mend his broken heart.
“Go away with me, Rita.”
She looks up at him. “Where to?”
“LA. We can start over. Start anew. Together.”
“I can't.”
Adam sighs. “So then tell me what happens? Where do we go from here?”
“God, I don't know… this is so complicated.”
He says nothing for such a long time that Rita thinks he’s fallen asleep.
“Are you and Frank… are you guys okay?”
“I don't really know. I feel like… like we’re just roommates these days.”
“So, no thoughts of separation or?”
She sighs and shakes her head.
She kisses his lips again and gets off his lap to sit by his side, wrapping her arms around his ribs.
“Do you love him?”
She looks up at him and stares into his eyes, then blinks away. “I think that when you've known someone forever… you learn to love them, simply because they are part of your life.”
She knows this isn't the answer he wants.
“Why can't you guys just… I don't know… separate if you're not happy with him?” he continues to ask questions and she feels embarrassed.
She lets go of him and stands, then attempts to fix her hair.
“It's complicated. Both of his parents and mine have been friends for years. His family and mine are linked and have a ton of history together. I can’t just… leave and ruin their friendship.”
He rises and walks to stand behind the sofa with his arms crossed over his chest, looking at her.
“Is that a deal-breaker?” she asks.
He studies her for a moment. “I love you,” he says with a smile.
She smiles back, goes to him and they hold each other close.
Closure
January 9, 2015
47
ADAM
After visiting Tianna, my folks, and Jordyn at the cemetery, I drove home to take the truck back then took a cab to the airport.
From there I called Rita to tell her goodbye and we had a little disagreement. I am not at all comfortable with our situation and I told her that we’d talk more about it when we take Aaron home. She offered to handle the memorial and to coordinate with Aaron’s school to have one there as well.
–
When I arrive at Howard's, after two, I find the three of them in the den watching a movie. Jaycob still looks disheveled but at least he’s out of his room.
Howard has an arm around Beth’s shoulder, which is when I find out that they’re dating—well not officially, as they have their first date planned for tonight. I am happy for my friend and that he finally found someone he deserves. I do hope it goes somewhere. Beth is an amazing person.
–
While they’re on their date, Jaycob and I go down to the beach for a while. We walk along the shore, enjoying the cool weather.
“Jake?”
“Yeah?” he says with his head down.
“Do you want to talk about any of this?”
He puffs up his cheeks and lets out a long breath. “I don’t even know where to start.”
“Remember when we used to say that back in the day? And dad always said, ‘start at the end and work your way back to the beginning.’”
He smiles. “I don’t know if I like the end, though.”
“It certainly sucks.”
We continue to walk in silence for a few minutes and watch the sun go down.
“Right now,” he says as he stares into the ocean. “I have no idea where to start or where to go from here.”
I place a hand on his shoulder and squeeze. “I’m right here, Jake. Always.”
He nods and then looks down to the sand where he picks up a shell. He admires it and then throws it into the water. “How old was dad when he joined the Peace Corps?”
“Early twenties. Why?”
He looks at me now and then back to the ocean. “I think I’m going to join,” he says and then shakes his head. “I can’t find my place anywhere, you know? I think I relied so much on Tianna that now that she’s gone, I feel lost, without guidance. These last few months have been a learning experience for me.”
This is the first time he opens up to me about anything so I don’t interrupt.
He sighs and goes on as we make our way b
ack to the Jeep. “I want to do more with my life. I think I’m too self-centered, to be honest. If I’ve learned anything these last few weeks is that life’s too short and it can change on a dime.”
We reach the car and he leans his back against it and I join him, with my hands in my pockets. He’s grown so much in just a few weeks.
“Whatever you decide, Jake, I support it,” I tell him and drape an arm around his shoulder.
–
I wake up just after seven. It’s been three days since I returned from Henderson and I’m still experiencing flashbacks from the day Colin died. Beth tells me that I should get help as should Jaycob but right now all I want is to forget what happened on that day.
After a quick shower, I go down for some coffee.
–
In the kitchen I find Jaycob at the table, eating cereal. He’s looking a little better, his broken nose is healing and his color is coming back. I go straight for the coffee. “How you holding up, Jake?” I say and sip coffee.
He’s on his phone and speaks without looking at him. “Beth thinks I should see a therapist.”
I lean back against the counter and sip. “What do you think?”
He looks up at me now, with a smirk. “I think that if I have to go to a therapist you have to go to a therapist.”
“Jake, I—”
“If you go, I’ll go.”
I smile in spite of myself. “Blackmail, huh?”
He shrugs. “Whatever it takes.”
I’m thoughtful for a moment and then do a double-take when I see Howard and Beth in the back yard, doing yoga. “What the hell?” I say and Jaycob follows my gaze. “They’ve been out there for like hours,” he says. “I mean, how many yoga poses or whatever are there?”
“Beats me,” I say. “Well, I’m going up to get some work done. Have any plans for today?”
“Howard wants me to help him with a few things at the station.”
“Okay. I’ll be up there if you need me,” I tell him and start to go but stop and turn around. “If we do go to a therapist it can’t be the same one.”
He rolls his eyes. “Whatever, weirdo.”
I smile and go upstairs.
–
After a few hours in which I conduct a conference call, answer emails and acquire a couple of new clients, I go downstairs for lunch. As I descend the sitars my phone rings. It’s from the mortuary informing me that Aaron’s ashes are ready to be picked up.
I walk to the kitchen to tell Beth I’m going out, but the house is empty. Posted on the refrigerator is a note from her:
Job interview! I’ll be back soon,
Beth
Looks like the date went well. If she’s looking for work here it means she’s not going back to Reno. This makes me smile.
48
RITA
For Rita, going back to work is as difficult as she expected. Her first day back is filled with hugs and condolences and all Rita wants is to be alone.
After work, she goes to visit her folks. She wants to appear normal and is somewhat surprised when her father said that they needed to talk to her.
–
They’re sitting in her parents’ living room. Rita is unsure of what’s going on but listens. She starts to wonder if they have more bad news. Are they sick?
Her father leans forward on the chair, looking at her. “We’re worried about you sweetheart,” he tells her.
Rita’s puzzled. “Why, dad?” She knows she hasn’t been herself, especially the last few days.
“Frank came to see us,” says her mom. “He’s very concerned about your safety and we think it’s best that you distance yourself from Tianna’s family.”
Not at all what she expected. She can’t believe that Frank would come whining to them.
“Mom,” says Rita, shaking her head. “I don’t know what Frank told you guys, but it’s not like that. I am only helping them get through the losses and…” she isn’t sure what else to tell them. They obviously believe whatever Frank told them.
“Honey,” says her father; his tone even and calm. “He says you’ve been distant and that’s not like you at all. You’re not happy, you’re always crying and—”
“I lost my best friend, dad.” She gets to her feet. “I know you expect me to be my old cheerful self but I can’t right now, okay? And I wish you all would understand.” She’s crying now.
Her father clears his throat and says, “Sweetie, we know it’s hard, but you need to move past this. Frank cares so much about you and wants you to be safe, and we do too.”
Her parents remain seated.
“I’ll be okay,” she attempts a smile. “Please, don’t worry.”
Her father reaches for the coffee table, takes the newspaper and opens it. On it is a picture of Julia and Ken but Rita doesn’t have to read the article.
She shakes her head. “Adam has nothing to do with all that, dad.”
Her dad then changes the page and Rita sees a photo of Irene and Colin. She has nothing more to say. She knows they won’t listen. She sits on the coffee, table facing them, knowing they will not understand.
“Honey, I don’t want you to be associated with these people, especially with elections coming,” says her dad who is running for school superintendent.
Rita’s heart is breaking. She cannot believe her dad is more worried about appearances. Her dad? Really? She gets up and walks to the door. “I hope you win,” she says and leaves their home.
She’s crying as she walks to her car where she sits for a long time, feeling lost and so disappointed. Her dad of all people should understand. Her parents taught her compassion growing up and now she isn’t sure what to think.
She’s so angry with Frank and her parents for the lack of support. She knows she has a way out, but she’s too scared to move forward. She hates conflict and nothing will change that. Maybe her parents are right.
Obviously, she can’t please everyone and needs to make a decision. Frank will never stop nagging at her until she stops talking to Adam and she knows that Adam is not okay with her being married, he made that clear when they said goodbye. Her phone rings, it’s Adam.
49
ADAM
The day is humid and dark clouds gather above. I take a deep breath before walking into the mortuary. The smell of candles and flowers is too familiar and my head is filled with memories of Tianna’s death when Aaron was still here.
I state my business to the woman behind the desk who tells me to wait a moment and disappears into what I assume is the back room. She’s only gone momentarily and returns with a cardboard box, no bigger than a shoebox. She asks for identification and I hand her my driver’s license. She inputs my information into the computer and gives back my card.
“The urn you chose is in the box,” she tells me as she hands it to me. I hold it close to my chest and walk out.
–
I sit in the Jeep for a long time. I can’t believe that the boy who was once full of life is now in this box. My heart longs for him. Holding his ashes makes it real. He’s gone.
I place the box in my lap and open it. My boy shouldn’t be in a damn cardboard box. The urn is made of ceramic, in cobalt blue with silver trim. I’m amazed at how small it is. How can that beautiful boy be… this? I throw the cardboard box in the back seat and put the urn in the passenger seat and manage to secure it with the seatbelt.
I stare at it for a long time. “We’ll take you to your mom soon, buddy,” I say and pull out of the parking lot.
I head west toward the beach. Friday afternoon traffic is light, especially on this side of town on an overcast day.
I go north on Pacific Coast Highway and drive for a few miles. I want to take Aaron to the ocean one last time before taking him home. I know, maybe I should wait until Jaycob is up for it, but I need to be alone. I feel relaxed and at peace having Aaron with me.
I roll down the windows to let in the salty air, cool and fresh and wonderful. Aaron fel
l in love with the ocean from the first time he saw it in person. At least I can say that I gave him that opportunity.
After driving for thirty minutes I turn left into a parking lot and stop the car. I sit in the Jeep for a long time, thinking about all that has happened in the last few months. It all feels like ages ago.
After a while, I look at the time, 3:33 p.m. I sit up straight, ready to go, but decide to give Rita a call to let her know I have the ashes.
“Hey,” her voice is sweet and soothing, but also sad.
“Hey, you. Just wanted to let you know that I have Aaron’s ashes.”
“Oh, that’s good. Thank God he’s with you now.” She doesn’t sound like herself.
“Is everything okay?”
She’s quiet for a moment, then says. “I… I don’t think I can help with the memorial.”
What the hell? “Why?”
“Frank, he… he went to my folks and told them I was in danger by talking to you and Jake.”
“Why?”
“They found out about Ken and Julia and about what happened to Colin. Now my dad is freaking out because he says it will ruin his chances of becoming superintendent.”
I am shocked. “Wow… so what are we going to do?”
“Adam, I… can’t handle so much pressure. I feel like I’m being pulled apart from every direction. There are so many expectations from everyone. I can’t… I need time to process everything.”
“How can I help?”
“I don’t know. Maybe… can we… go back to being friends?”
Ouch. I have no words. I can’t believe this is happening all over again.
“I’m sorry,” she says through sniffles. “I just… I can’t seem to ditch Frank, he’s constantly around and I know he’s going to be watching my every move and… I’m sorry. Adam, I love you, I do, but I can’t put you through this. Please give me time. At least until the whole Colin thing dies down.”