“What’s up, honey?” She slides her glasses to the tip of her nose as she glances up from the book she’s reading. “Trouble sleeping?”
Clutching Jenna’s diary from the summer before seventh grade to my chest, I glide over to the chaise lounge situated next to her nightstand and sit.
“What do you have there?” She dog ears her book and places it on the nightstand. Then she wriggles upright and adjusts the pillows behind her.
“Do you promise you won’t be upset with me?”
Turning to face me, she throws the covers off and swings her legs over the side of the bed. “Keeley. What is it?”
“Do you promise?”
Sighing, she says, “I promise . . . but only if it’s not something illegal. Now what is it?”
I release Jenna’s diary from the death grip I have on it and lay it gently on my lap. “We found Jenna’s old diaries. Well, Leighton did.”
“Oh, Keeley, not ag—”
“Mom,” I plead, “you have to read something. Something horrible that happened to her when we were twelve. And I’m positive it wasn’t just the one time.”
“What are you talking about?” she says, standing.
“You have to read it for yourself, Mom. I don’t even think I can stand to read it again,” I say. I wipe my eyes with one hand and hold the diary out to my mom with the other. She slowly reaches out and takes it from me. “Read the entries dated August thirtieth and August thirty-first.”
“Keeley, I can’t read Jenna’s diary,” she says, shaking her head and placing it on her nightstand. “But I’ll go with you tomorrow to return it to Bonnie. Then she and Joseph can decide whether to read it or not. Now please—”
“Pastor Thomas assaulted her.”
“Excuse me?” She places a hand on her chest.
“That’s why she’s been having so many problems lately. I think it all happened when we were younger, before he left for college. And now he’s back, and she can’t handle it. And Delaney and I should have known.” Tears form, and my face heats up with anger and regret. I feel like I’ve let Jenna down.
“Oh, my . . . Are you sure?” she stammers. “What exactly does it . . . are you positive about this?” She snatches the diary from her nightstand, sits on her bed, and places it on her lap. Then she flips to the entry from August thirtieth and reads as I look on. A few moments in, I already have to get her some tissues. When she’s finished, she stares straight ahead, a blank expression on her face. And I just sit there and wait for her to say something, anything. Instead, she flips to the next entry.
“Mom?”
She puts a hand up to silence me. So, I lay back on the chaise lounge and wait while she reads a few more entries. I get her new tissues when her eyes well up with fresh tears. Then I get some for myself too because seeing her cry makes me cry.
“Oh, Keeley,” my mom says, closing Jenna’s diary. “Oh, honey.” She joins me on the chaise, and we hold each other until our sobbing ceases.
“Who else knows about this?” my mom asks, standing and getting new tissues.
“Just Delaney and Leighton.”
She nods as she hands me a tissue and then blows her nose.
“So, what should we do? The three of us talked about giving all the diaries to Mrs. Kemp, but we’re afraid she might not want to turn them over to the police because she’ll want to protect Thomas.”
“No,” my mom says shaking her head. “Absolutely not. When Bonnie finds out, she will do everything in her power to make sure Thomas pays for what he did to Jenna. Trust me,” she cups my chin, “I know.”
For the first time since I found out about Thomas, I breathe a sigh of relief.
“Mom?”
“Mm-hm.”
“There’s something else.”
“What is it?”
“The night Jenna disappeared, Leighton says she had plans to confront Thomas. She was going to tell him that she was going to the police about what he did to her unless he turned himself in.”
“Oh, Keeley,” she says, gripping her forehead. “We need to give these to Bonnie and Joseph as soon as possible.”
I stand and pick up Jenna’s diary. “Is it okay if I put this with the others?”
“Of course. Get some rest, and we’ll deal with this tomorrow. Goodnight, sweetie.” She kisses me on the forehead.
“Goodnight.”
As I pull my parents’ bedroom door closed, I hear my dad’s groggy voice. “What’s going on?” I hear the bits and pieces of my mom’s response. “Keeley’s . . . upset . . . back to sleep . . . morning.”
Before I go to sleep, I call Jenna’s phone, even though I know it’ll probably still go to voicemail.
“Hey, Jennaboo. It’s me Keeley. I miss you. We all do. And we need you to come home. I’m so sorry for not responding to your text last Friday. Turn your phone on, and you’ll get so sick of me because I’ll text you every day for the rest of your life . . . Jenna, are you there?”
When I disconnect, I can barely see through my tears.
Chapter Forty-Four
Friday, October 6, 2017
Three Weeks Before Jenna’s Disappearance
“So, what do you feel like doing tonight?” Leighton asked Jenna as they walked up the stairs to Leighton’s bedroom. Jenna took a seat on Leighton’s bed. She was clutching a pink and gray bag to her chest. “You can put that down if you want,” Leighton said, motioning to a chair in the corner of her room.
“I don’t know,” Jenna said, walking over to the chair and placing her bag on it. “What do you want to do? Thanks for having your mom call my mom, by the way.”
“Sure,” Leighton said with a shrug. She looked down at her phone when it pinged. “I was going to suggest a party on the East side Sticks heard about, but I just got a text from this guy I met at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert at Summerfest. He says he and a buddy are looking for something lowkey to do tonight. Do you want me to invite them over? Or would you rather check out the party? Or we could just watch movies. It’s up to you.” Leighton held her phone, poised to respond to the text one way or the other, depending on Jenna’s response.
After two weekends in a row of parties, Jenna figured staying in would be better. “Invite them over. Maybe we can all watch movies,” she said with a shrug.
Two hours later, the girls were playing drinking card games like Asshole and Bullshit with Aaron and Trey, the guys Leighton had invited over. Aaron was the guy Leighton had met at the Chili Peppers concert. They’d texted and hung out a few times after, but this was the first time they’d seen each other since school started.
As the minutes ticked by, the guys spent less time focusing on playing cards and more time focusing on playing the girls. Leighton was keen to the moves that were being made, but Jenna didn’t seem privy. She didn’t react at all when Aaron put his hand on Leighton’s thigh or when he leaned over and bit her earlobe playfully. Nor did she react when Trey slid close to her so that their thighs were touching. Maybe it was the rum and Cokes they’d been drinking, or maybe she didn’t mind.
When the cards had been abandoned and The Breakfast Club turned on, the four sat in pairs—Aaron and Leighton on the loveseat and Jenna and Trey on the couch. Aaron was just about to put the moves on Leighton when Trey said, “You got any pretzels or something?” He swiped his fingers around the edges of his mouth bringing them down into a V at his chin. Jenna recalled seeing him do this a few times throughout the evening and wondered if it was a nervous habit like the way Dustin always ran his fingers through his hair. Then she scolded herself for thinking about Dustin.
“No, but we have some pickles and cheese curds.”
“What about Doritos or something? Something crunchy.” Trey asked.
“Pickles are crunchy,” Leighton said, giving him a look.
Trey gripped the couch cushion and pushed himself up. “Aaron, gimme your keys. I’m gonna run and get something. You all want anything?”
“I’ll just
go with you. I need cigarettes,” Aaron said. “You two wanna come?”
When they got to the gas station on the corner of Hampton and Santa Monica, Leighton and Jenna decided they were too cozy in the backseat of Aaron’s car to make the trek inside. “Get me a Coke,” Leighton said, as they got out of the car.
Trey leaned his head back inside. “Jenna, you want anything?”
Jenna shook her head then continued swaying to the song that was playing. She smiled a thanks at Trey, and he smiled back. When he stood to leave and closed the door, a couple walking out of the Italian restaurant next door caught her eye and then her breath.
“What?” Leighton asked, catching the stone-cold expression on Jenna’s face. She followed her gaze out the window then moved her body to block Jenna’s view. “Don’t worry about them, Jenna.” But Jenna didn’t so much as blink. “Hey,” Leighton said, shaking Jenna’s knee.
“Huh,” Jenna finally met Leighton’s eyes.
“I said don’t worry about them.”
“I’m not,” she lied. But she wasn’t just thinking about how close Delaney and Dustin were walking next to each other or how happy they looked. She was also thinking about how she could use another rum and Coke and a cigarette or two.
By the time eleven o’clock rolled around, Jenna was feeling nice and toasty inside. She was hoping Trey might kiss her, but he only seemed interested in having his arm around her as they sipped their drinks, smoked their cigarettes, and watched end credits of the movie. Leighton and Aaron were another story. Jenna tried not to watch as they made out, but she couldn’t help stealing a few peeks. She looked over at Trey and was about to lean over and kiss him, but his phone rang.
“Hey,” he said, standing and walking to a far corner of the room. Jenna sighed and watched as he talked and nodded to whoever was on the other end. “Hey, Leighton,” he called out.
Leighton didn’t respond so he walked up next to the sex-crazed pair and leaned in close. “Leighton, what’s your address?”
“Why?” Leighton and Aaron both looked up at Trey, unfazed by how close he was to them.
“A buddy of mine is in the area and needs to stop by,” Trey said, standing.
Leighton rattled off her address, and within minutes, the doorbell rang. Leighton looked over and saw Trey was already moving toward the door, so she went back to kissing Aaron, who’d never stopped kissing in places other than her mouth.
“Hey, man,” Trey said, opening the door.
Jenna thought she was imagining it at first when she saw Jamie Bock walk through the door. When she realized it was him, she quickly set her drink down on the table and pushed the ashtray she’d been using as far away from her as possible. She didn’t need any more rumors about her circulating at school.
“Jenna Kemp? What the hell are you doing with this guy?” Jamie said as he gave Trey a dude handshake. He glanced over at Aaron and Leighton on the couch. Aaron raised his arm and did some kind of symbol with his fingers in greeting. Leighton ignored Jamie.
“I’m just hanging out . . . Leighton knows them.”
“Hope you’re behaving yourself,” Jamie said with a nod before he and Trey turned their attention back to each other. From what Jenna could tell, Jamie was there to do some business with Trey. She saw them make an exchange but couldn’t tell who had given what to whom. Then Jamie was gone, and Trey was back next to Jenna rolling a joint.
“Be careful. This stuff is strong,” Trey said to Jenna.
Jenna didn’t listen, and the next thing she knew, the room was dim, and a hand was stroking her arm. It took her a few seconds to get her bearings. “Trey?” she said.
“Shhh,” he said back. Then he kissed her neck, and she froze.
By then Jenna’s eyes had adjusted to the dark, so she was confused when she saw blond hair. Wasn’t Trey’s hair black? When she realized what was happening, she tried to push herself up, but she was trapped under Aaron’s weight.
“Get off of me,” Jenna said, but either Aaron hadn’t heard her, or he was too messed up to care. Jenna struggled and pushed and squealed, suddenly reenacting what she imagined herself doing when she was twelve years old. And just when she was about to start punching and pulling hair, the lights turned on.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Leighton said, rushing down the last few stairs. All she had on was an oversized T-shirt. “Get off of her, you asshole!”
Jenna’s eyes flicked from Leighton’s wild eyes as she approached, to Aaron’s glazed eyes, to Trey on the loveseat. He was beginning to stir.
Within seconds, Aaron was on his feet, shirt in hand, and Leighton was shoving him toward the door with her body. “Jenna, throw me his keys,” Leighton said without taking her eyes off Aaron. When she heard the keys rattle, she looked over her shoulder and caught them when Jenna tossed them. “Get out of here, and don’t ever contact me again,” Leighton said, shoving Aaron’s keys into his pocket.
Aaron mumbled obscenities as he put his shirt on. “Yo, Trey, wake up.”
“I’m up. What’s going on?” Trey stood and glanced around the room, blinking a few times. When he saw Jenna’s unbuttoned shirt and the way Aaron was practically pinned to the door by Leighton, he seemed to understand they’d overstayed their welcome. He gathered up his belongings off the coffee table and met his friend at the door.
Within minutes of Aaron and Trey’s exit, Jenna had returned to the groggy state she’d been in before she realized Aaron was touching her. Leighton took a seat at the other end of the couch and covered herself with a blanket. She sat there staring at the front door and smoking a cigarette.
“Thank you,” Jenna whispered.
“That guy is an asshole,” Leighton responded.
“Why did you burn that letter from your dad?” Jenna didn’t know why she was asking that question at that moment, but it had been on her mind ever since the day she witnessed it. Plus, she figured she’d shared her own dark secret with Leighton the weekend before, so it seemed only fair for Leighton to share a secret of her own in return.
Leighton caught Jenna’s eye and stared at her for a second as she took a drag. After she exhaled all the smoke, she started talking.
“The last time I had friends sleep over, I was in ninth grade. It was Sasha, who I’d been best friends with since kindergarten, and this new girl Candy, who’d moved to our neighborhood that summer. My mom was working late at the hospital like she always does, so my dad was home with us. We’d just removed our charcoal masks and brushed our teeth. At that point, we were all going to take turns in the bathroom to change and do whatever. Anyway, while Sasha and Candy were taking their turns, I went downstairs to get my phone charger and bottles of water for everyone. When I got back upstairs, I caught sight of Candy walking back into my room.
I figured I’d drop the water bottles off in my bedroom before using the bathroom. So when I got in there, Candy was standing just inside the door like she was frozen. Sasha was sitting on my bed reading a magazine. I held a bottle over Sasha’s shoulder, but she didn’t reach back for it, so I lowered it and squeezed by her so I could get all the way into my room. As I did Sasha looked up and asked Candy if she was okay. Candy raised her electric toothbrush cap as she raised her eyes to meet mine and said she’d forgotten it, so she’d gone back to get it. I shrugged, tossed a water bottle onto the bed next to Sasha, and tried to hand one to Candy again but again she didn’t take. She looked up at me and said she didn’t feel well and had to go home. I asked her what was wrong, but she just repeated she had to go, so her mom picked her up, and when I asked my best friend if she thought the new girl was really sick, she said she didn’t know. Then I asked if she wanted to watch a movie, but she said she was tired, so I lay there watching TV by myself and wondering why Candy had to leave so suddenly. Monday at school just didn’t feel right. I had the sense people were whispering behind my back, and it kept happening day after day. Within a week, I felt like a total outcast, so I asked Sasha, who had also been actin
g weird toward me, if she knew anything. She told me Candy had told her that my dad had exposed himself to her, and then she told me that my dad had done the same thing to her a few times. I was pissed and called her a liar, which made things worse, of course. School became a daily hell for me because everyone seemed to think I must have been defending my dad. My mom never believed it was true, and even after she found out he’d gotten a twenty-year-old pregnant and was leaving us for her, my mom still wanted him to stay. Can you imagine what it was like when that got added to the Leighton Pierce rumor mill at school?”
Leighton paused, listening for a response from Jenna. When all she heard was slow rhythmic breathing, she stood and tossed the blanket over Jenna. Before she went up to bed, she said, “So, anyway, yeah, the rumors you’ve probably heard about me ripping Candy Sloan’s hair out might have some truth to them.”
October 7, 2017
Dear Diary,
I finally figured out a way to escape. Leighton. Her mom will tell my mom and dad whatever they want to hear. She set my mom’s mind at ease last night, telling her that she’d be home all night long to monitor Leighton and me. Well, here’s a secret. She really wasn’t. It’s not that her mom is a deadbeat parent or anything. She just works nights and likes to sleep at her boyfriend’s on weekends.
Some of her friends came over and drank and played some drinking games I’d never played before. It was actually a lot of fun, and I thought maybe it would continue that way. But then we took a drive to a gas station, and I saw Dustin and Delaney walking out of a restaurant together. I told myself it wasn’t them at first, but my mind just doesn’t seem to like when I try to block out things that bother me, so yep, it was them. When we got back to Leighton’s I tried to drown out how upset I was over seeing them by drinking more, but that didn’t really work. And then one of the guys who was there (Trey) he offered me some really strong weed, so I took it hoping that would put Dustin and Delaney out of my head. And it did. And things would have been great after that if I hadn’t woken up to the other guy Aaron all over me, groping me, and trying to kiss me. Thank God Leighton stopped him.
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