by Tara Sivec
“You do know I can read your face like a book, right?” he muses, the corner of his mouth tipping up until I can see his dimple, making my cheeks flush with embarrassment, and okay fine, a whole hell of a lot of need. “Keep holding on to that for me, would ya?”
The next sound out of my mouth is a shocked gasp when Shepherd instantly drops to his knees in front of me, skillfully unbuttoning my jean shorts and yanking them down my legs before I can even blink. My shorts are in a pool around my ankles when I take in a shaky breath, thankful for the mirror behind me to lean against as I watch Shepherd. He’s just staring between my thighs, his line of sight directly on the center of my white lace thong I pulled out of the far, far back of my top dresser drawer that Tess bought for me years ago and still had the tags on them. Not that I thought anything like this would happen here, but I had hoped for a little fun later tonight after the festival.
Trying not to clutch the ice cream cone in my hand so tightly it crumbles and squishes all over the place, my eyes dart back and forth between Shepherd actually kneeling in front of me and the reflection of Shepherd kneeling in front of me just over his shoulder with all the zig-zagging mirrors behind him, while I also try not to squirm while he just looks at me.
“What are you—Oooh, sweet Lord,” I moan loudly when Shepherd’s hands grip my bare upper thighs and he just dives right in, nuzzling his nose against my lace-covered mound, my eyelids fluttering closed and my head thunking back against the mirror.
It takes a few seconds of him just rubbing his nose back and forth over me, whispering about how incredible I smell, until that lacy scrap of material is so wet I might need to wring it out.
“Sh-Shepherd,” I choke out a few seconds later when I can remember how to breathe again, pulling my head up to look up at him and instantly regretting it. With all the reflections of the back of Shepherd’s head bobbing and turning from side to side while he just inhales me and rubs his face back and forth over me, I almost don’t finish my sentence, but I have to. “We’re in a funhouse on the beach where someone could walk in at any minute.”
I hate myself as soon as the words are out of my mouth, especially since before we even came in here, I was searching everywhere for a private spot for us, but seriously. Anyone could walk in at any minute! That makes it kind of hard to enjoy this, and I really need to pull my shorts back up.
Shepherd pulls his head back and doesn’t even look up at me. He just stares between my thighs like someone put him in a trance, his fingers digging into the flesh of my thighs a little harder. Another gasp flies out of my mouth when Shepherd lets go of one of my legs to drag the tip of his pointer finger down my lace-covered center. When he feels how wet I am for him, he looks up from his position on his knees in front of me with a smirk.
“You did notice the ferris wheel had been stopped for a good half hour before we came in here, right?” Shepherd asks softly, dragging his finger down over the front of my thong again until I whimper and my hips churn, seeking more of his touch, really not giving a shit if anyone walks in here at this point, as he continues talking. “Palmer slipped the ride operator a hundred bucks to keep him and Birdie at the top for a while.”
It takes a lot of brain power to think about what he’s saying while he continues to rub the tip of his finger up and down over me with the lightest of feather touches. I did notice the ferris wheel had been stopped for a while, but I just assumed it was having mechanical issues or no one wanted to ride it. Knowing how protective Shepherd is of me, even though the festival is pretty much dead right now, there’s no way he would be down on his knees getting ready to do what I think he’s going to do to me if there was even the slightest chance someone would walk in here. He knows how absolutely mortifying that would be for me and not at all hot.
That finger Shepherd has been torturing me with slides under the edge of my thong between my legs, when what he’s saying finally clicks and I remember how to speak.
“Do I even want to ask how much you paid the funhouse operator so we could be alone in here?”
Shepherd slowly drags his finger holding that scrap of wet lace to the side until…
Holy shit, he’s totally looking at my naked vagina! Don’t be weird, don’t be weird, don’t be weird!
“For something like this?” Shepherd asks, licking his lips as he just kneels there, staring at me. “This is priceless, baby. I gave him my fucking credit card.”
Before I can laugh and ask him if he’s joking, I let out a strangled cry as he closes the distance and dives right back between my thighs, his tongue licking right up the center of me exactly like he did to the ice cream cone a hundred times tonight.
“Oh my God!” I shout, my head smacking back against the mirror behind me and my eyes squeezing closed when I feel Shepherd’s hands slide up higher until his thumbs slip through my wetness and part my lips for his mouth.
“Christ, your pussy tastes like heaven,” Shepherd growls before taking another long swipe with his tongue, spreading me wider with his thumbs, his breath panting over my pulsing clit when he stops just before his tongue gets to it and drives me out of my mind.
“Open your eyes and give me a lick,” he suddenly orders.
I don’t even think; I just open my eyes and shove the ice cream cone in my hand at his face, moaning when he takes a great big lick of the melting ice cream. The heels of his hands push my legs wider apart, and then his mouth moves away from the cone I’m holding to go right back where it was.
Gibberish and curses fly from my mouth when his cold, flattened tongue finally licks slowly against my clit, circling and circling until the coldness disappears. There’s nothing left in its place but Shepherd’s hot, wet tongue licking and lapping and intensifying the throbbing until my knees start to shake and my free hand quickly reaches out to grab a fistful of his hair to hold on tight.
Shepherd pulls his mouth back from between my thighs, and I have a two-second reprieve where I can catch my breath while he glances up at me, his eyes hooded and dark with desire, all for me.
“Go ahead and rip my hair out of my head if you want to,” he tells me, growling when I tighten my grip. “I don’t care what you do to me, as long as you scream my name when you come all over my mouth.”
There’s no time to compliment Shepherd on his dirty talk, when he quickly wraps his lips around what’s left of the ice cream, sucking in a mouthful while I’m still mindlessly holding it in front of my stomach, before his cold lips are wrapping around my clit again. He clamps down and sucks while the tip of his chilled tongue flicks back and forth, over and over until the coldness disappears again and there’s nothing but warm, wet heat between my legs once more, and I forget my own name.
The ice cream cone drops from my hand with a splat on the black carpet, and my jaw drops open with whimpers and pants as I look at the reflections just beyond Shepherd’s shoulder, heightening the pulsing, throbbing need he’s created. I just stare at the images in front of me of Shepherd down on his knees, pressing and holding my bare thighs wide open with his palms. The view of my wet, aching pussy on full display every time Shepherd’s head bobs and moves, where I can not only feel his mouth wrapped around me and working me over so perfectly, but I can see it in the reflection. There’s something so much hotter about that, watching his mouth move against me, feeling it happen while I watch, making me feel like I’m outside of my body watching a movie of Shepherd feasting on me like I’m the most delicious dessert he’s ever tasted. Like I’m watching the best porn ever and getting off on it. And holy hell am I getting off on watching what’s happening, hundreds of Shepherds on his knees with his head buried between my thighs, giving me oral in a funhouse. I watch my fingers tighten their grip in his hair, moaning loudly as I tug him harder against me, thrusting my hips and moving myself against his perfect mouth, needing him to suck harder and lick faster.
Holy shit, I’m going to pass out when this orgasm hits.
I watch through the reflection as Sheph
erd lets go of one of my thighs, and I see his hand disappear from my line of sight until I feel what he’s doing, and one of his long, thick fingers sinks deep inside me while he flicks his tongue back and forth over my clit.
It’s all too much, and I can’t keep my eyes open any longer. I squeeze them closed and hold onto the back of Shepherd’s head with both my hands, feeling his head bob and twist and turn as he licks and sucks, fucking me with his finger, until I’m doing exactly as he ordered and screaming his name as I come against his mouth.
His tongue never stops licking and his finger never stops pumping in and out of me through my release, until I barely have time to recover before Shepherd is up from his knees and pushing his shorts down just enough for his cock to spring out. With my hands still gripping the back of his head, I bring his mouth down against mine, tasting myself on his tongue and moaning into his mouth when he wraps both his arms around me, lifts me up so I can wrap my legs around his waist, and pins me against the mirror behind me by plunging his cock inside me in one hard, deep thrust.
There’s nothing I can do but tighten my legs around him and hold on tight as Shepherd fucks me against the funhouse mirror, his quick and powerful thrusts smacking his groin right against my clit, reigniting another orgasm that has me moaning into Shepherd’s mouth while our kiss never stops. My body tightens and clenches around him with a second orgasm, making Shepherd rip his mouth away from mine to bury his face in the side of my neck, thrusting into me deep and hard one last time before he comes, cursing and groaning and praising my name with his lips press against my shoulder.
With a few more jerky pumps of his hips between my legs, Shepherd groans and then collapses against me, pinning me harder against the mirror while we both pant and try to catch our breaths.
“Jesus Christ, you make me come in an embarrassingly short amount of time,” he complains with a small chuckle, our bodies still pressed tightly together, and I enjoy my view of Shepherd’s bare ass in the reflection over his shoulder.
With his cock still pulsing inside me, my body clenches around him again while I stare at the picture we make in the mirror, and I smile when Shepherd lets out another loud groan, complaining about how I’m going to kill him. My cheeks are flushed, my eyes are bright and wild-looking as Shepherd holds me pinned against the mirror at my back, and my legs are still wrapped tightly around his waist. My ankles are locked together above that great ass, with his shorts pushed down right below it, because he didn’t even bother taking them all the way off he needed inside me so badly.
“I will never again in my life call vanilla ice cream boring.” I sigh contentedly, running my fingers gently through Shepherd’s hair after almost ripping it all out by the roots, while he peppers kisses along my shoulder and up the side of my neck as he pulls his hips back and pulls himself out of me.
I’ve never acknowledged the fact that I looked up what the purple rose meant right after our first date, and Shepherd has never asked me if I did. I know he’s just waiting for me, giving me time, and not wanting to put any pressure on me. And even though I know telling someone you love them probably isn’t ideal right after they gave you your first screaming oral orgasm, I can’t help it, and the words are right there on the tip of my tongue just begging to be unleashed. Shepherd is just going to continue being perfect and amazing and making all my dreams come true, and keeping one last stupid wall up with him out of fear of getting hurt is just silly and a waste of time.
Deciding it might be best to actually put on pants before I make this declaration of love, I swallow my words until we’re at least out of the funhouse and away from all the orgasms.
“Not so basic now, am I?” Shepherd asks with a smirk as he keeps his hands on my hips and holds me steady while I unwrap my legs from around him and slide them down until my feet are back on the carpet.
“Eh, you’re all right. That ice cream cone was really the star here tonight.”
My laughter is cut off by a squeal when Shepherd brings his palm down with a smack against my ass then kisses that squeal right out of my mouth, while I think about the best way to tell him I love the shit out of him.
“Yo! Don’t forget your AmEx, dude.”
Shepherd just laughs at the shocked look on my face when we exit the funhouse, and he grabs his credit card a carnie holds up between two of his fingers as he leans against a light post. Well, the only two fingers he has on that hand….
“Don’t look at me like that; I already told you what I did to secure that funhouse,” Shepherd says with another laugh, sliding his freaking black AmEx into his wallet before shoving it into the front pocket of his shorts and then grabbing my hand as we walk toward the parking lot. “Don’t worry; I called and put a limit on it first. I’m not an amateur.”
“You’re insane.” I shake my head at him with a huge smile on my face that I just can’t seem to erase ever since Shepherd got back down on his knees in the funhouse and helped me put my shorts back on before we walked out here.
“What’s insane is that I will be tasting you on my lips for the rest of the night, driving me crazy while I’m in my bed without you.”
I shiver at his words, and Shepherd lets go of my hand to wrap his arm around my shoulders, tugging me against his side as we walk past all of the closed and dark rides and shut-down booths.
“Shepherd, I—”
My phone chimes with a text, cutting me off and pissing me right the hell off for the interruption, until I pull it out and see it’s from Owen. Since he’s probably home by now and alone, I should make sure there isn’t an emergency. And besides, I’d kind of like to text Owen before we get home to see how he feels about Shepherd possibly having a sleepover. He spent the night when his parents slept on my couch, but he slept on the floor in the middle of the living room. I don’t know how appropriate it is to have a man spend the night in my bedroom, since I’ve never had to cross this bridge before, but Owen’s going to have to get used to it at some point. And tonight, there’s no way I’m letting Shepherd go back to his place after he drops me off. Plus, I’m hoping after what I tell him, he won’t want to leave my side anyway.
As I open up the text as we walk, Shepherd drops his arm from around my shoulders to fish his golf cart keys out of his pocket, and I quickly skim the text. And then read it again. And one more time just to make sure I’m not seeing things, my heart hasn’t started thundering in my chest like a heard of elephants, and my hands haven’t gotten sweaty and shaky for no reason. The third time does the charm, and the words my son sent to me finally register, and all of that happy, post-orgasmic glow and love lighting me up instantly goes dark like someone flipped a switch.
My feet come to a stop in the grass as everything I ate at the festival today starts churning in my stomach, making me want to throw up. Shepherd keeps walking a few steps before he realizes I stopped, the smile on his face when he looks back at me immediately dropping.
“What’s wrong? What happened? Is it Owen?” he quickly asks when he rushes back to me and takes the phone out of my hand when he sees the look on my face.
Although I don’t know what he’s even seeing when he looks at me, because I don’t even know what the hell I’m feeling right now. Sad? Mad? Hurt? Shock? All the above? I study Shepherd’s face as he reads what Owen sent me, hoping maybe it’s a joke, something the two of them cooked up just to freak me out. But I watch the calmness settle over Shepherd when he realizes Owen isn’t hurt, and I watch the smile light up his face when he looks up from reading the text, and it feels like someone just stabbed a knife into my chest.
“Seriously, that kid is so impatient. Well, surprise! Isn’t it great?”
I hear myself make some sort of sound like a choked whimper when I realize it’s not a joke, and it suddenly feels like someone shoved me off a cliff and I’m falling, falling, falling….
Shepherd laughs softly, probably thinking I’m so overjoyed at what he’s done I can’t find words, and pain ricochets through my body l
ike I just slammed into the ground.
Except it’s the pain of knowing who pushed me that hurts the worst.
“You set up a meeting with a college baseball scout for my son tonight and didn’t tell me?” I ask with a shaky whisper while it takes everything in me not to throw up when I say those words out loud. I hate that my voice sounds small and weak, and I would give anything for my eyes not to be filling with tears right now so I could at least look strong, even though I don’t feel it.
Shepherd just shrugs with that easy smile on his face, like it’s no big deal my son sent me a four paragraph text gushing about how Shepherd set up a FaceTime call with the scout tonight, and how Shepherd sent him Owen’s stats and he’s impressed, and how he’s going to come out and catch one of his games soon, and how it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and how Shepherd even hired a retired professional baseball player from the Virginia Rebels to start giving him private batting lessons.
“Isn’t it awesome?” Shepherd asks happily, oblivious to me standing here in front of him feeling like my insides are being ripped out of me. “It’s an amazing opportunity Owen would never have otherwise.”
And there it is.
He would never have it otherwise, because I could never give him something like this. I can’t just flash my black AmEx and get whatever I want for my son. I have to work my ass off and miss out on so much of his life just to give him the things I can, and God, that’s never hurt more than it does right now. All of those sacrifices I made, thinking I was making my son happy, and it will never be good enough. It will never be enough when someone else can so easily give him so much more.
It was sweet and romantic when Shepherd did it for me, and all the other times he pulled strings and did something insane and over the top for me. But it’s not sweet and it’s not funny when he does it for my son without even asking. When he sets up a meeting I could never set up, and pays for a professional coach I could never afford, and makes plans for my son’s future without even consulting me. I have always had control over every decision that’s made regarding Owen, and it’s the only thing I have ever had control over in my life, and now it’s just being ripped away from me, because no matter what I do, it will never be enough.