by Amelia Grey
On the glimmer of hope she might be wrong, she turned. Their eyes met and held. It was him.
Merciful heavens. He was more handsome and powerful-looking than she’d remembered. Thick, black hair was combed away from his broad, masculine brow and fell to the top of his collar at the nape. His cheekbones were high and well-defined. His narrow, high-bridged nose added to the rugged look of his lightly square chin and jaw. The fit of his fawn-colored coat across his shoulders was exceptional and emphasized his broad, muscular chest. She was intensely aware of the strength and command that emanated from his body. Her pulse raced and her muscles coiled tightly at seeing him again.
In that moment, somehow she knew they’d been destined to meet again.
He nodded once. “Mrs. Feld, I am Blacknight.”
Her breath caught and swirled in her chest as she stood spellbound by who he was. The way his gaze swept down her face and slowly back to her eyes sent her senses reeling. It was almost too much to take in. Unbelievably so. She had rescued the man who was known far and wide as the black sheep of the Blacknight family.
She’d heard rumors of his wild escapades for years. His father had died when he was a babe and his mother and school masters had never been able to tame him into a respectable gentleman. Just weeks ago, he had become an earl and head of the family that had all but disowned him for his ruinous behavior.
Brina managed a belated curtsey as many thoughts became an incoherent jumble in her mind. Had he known who she was that night in Paris or found out later? That was over three months ago. What was he doing at her house now?
“I have heard of you,” she said cautiously, not wanting to let on that she recognized him until she knew for sure whether he remembered her. There could be many reasons for his visit, and she didn’t want to presume anything.
“I don’t believe we’ve been formally introduced.”
“No,” she whispered softly. “We haven’t.”
He tilted his head in question before a hint of a smile played at the corners of his mouth. “But, you do remember me?”
Oh, yes.
She wasn’t likely to forget a man who was dressed only in his shirt and trousers and tied to a chair. Or his shocking embrace and unforgettable kiss once she’d freed him. And truth be told, she’d caught herself wondering from time to time if she ever crossed his mind the way he had hers since he fled the room.
It was best to start with the most reasonable question. “How do you know my name?”
“By chance,” he offered in a relaxing tone, while his gaze held tightly to hers. “I recognized you walking down the street with the girls this morning. I asked my uncle about you. I could never forget you, Mrs. Feld. Or what you did for me.”
The kiss he gave her came searing across her senses again as it had so many times. And then another horror struck her. What must he be thinking about her now? She was known throughout the ton as the widow who’d never given up her widow’s weeds. Yet, he’d seen her clothed in a voluminous pink satin gown. How had she lowered her defenses and allowed Aunt Josette to talk her into wearing the lavish costume? Clearly the mask had not hidden her identity as her aunt had insisted.
“Should we talk about that evening in Paris?” he asked when she remained quiet.
“Why would we?” she answered quickly, gathering some measure of control. Lifting her chin and shoulders, she hoped she didn’t look as stricken as she suddenly felt.
“Perhaps because we both know why I was there, but I have no idea why you were at the ball.”
Brina didn’t want him to know her reasons. Motives that appeared logical at the time, now seemed foolish. But, what was he thinking? That she led two different lives?
“I don’t believe an answer to that is necessary.” She silently inhaled deeply to steady herself and took a step back from him. “We were at a masquerade. I trust the purpose of such evenings is things that happen there are not talked about later.”
His eyes narrowed but continued to hold steady on hers. For a moment, she thought he might question her further, but thankfully, he merely nodded acceptance of her statement.
“If you’re here because you fear I might tell someone about what I did for—what happened at the ball, you can rest assured I haven’t spoken a word to anyone about that night.”
He chuckled softly, and she found even that quite inviting. Every little thing about him made her take notice. How could that be? She didn’t want to be attracted to him or any man. She had helped him when he needed it and that should be the end of their association.
“I’m not worried about that, Mrs. Feld. You could tell the whole of London how you found me, and no one would be shocked or think it out of the ordinary that you stumbled upon me in such a compromised state.”
What he said was probably true. She had heard talk and knew how some in his family viewed him. However, they would be surprised to learn she was there and dressed as she was.
As if reading her mind, he added, “On my honor and the Blacknight family, I will never disclose to anyone when, how, or where we met the first time.”
She believed him and gave a silent thank-you.
“I hope you were able to accomplish your mission on your nephew’s behalf.”
“Robert’s my cousin. And I arrived just in time. I hauled him over to Vienna, and within the week, he’d found someone new to bestow his affections on.”
“Yes, of course. I recognize the name Robert Browning. I’ve met him at parties. He’s usually with my cousin, Harper Tabor, who I’ve always thought of as more a brother than cousin. Neither of us had siblings. I suppose it’s good your cousin’s heart wasn’t broken for too long.”
“I was sure that would be the case.”
Brina cleared her throat softly before saying, “Well, thank you for stopping by to let me know he is doing well and that you know who I am. It will make it easier between us now should we meet again.”
The earl made no motion to move but remained in his relaxed stance, though his expression was of a more serious nature. “I do have another reason for coming over that has nothing to do with our previous meeting. Something more important.”
His words intrigued her, causing her chest to flutter again. For a fleeting moment she wondered if he might have another daring rescue to attend. Whether or not he intended it, everything about him was seductive. A fact that made it difficult to shy away from him as was her usual course with all gentlemen.
Her gaze settled fully on his. “What could that be?”
“It’s something I felt obligated to tell you so it wouldn’t come as a shock when you hear it from others.”
Tensing, her mind flew back to the extraordinary evening in Paris. “Do others already know about Paris? Will there be gossip about us?”
The seriousness left his eyes. An engaging smile prefaced his statement. “You worry too much, Mrs. Feld. I’m sure no one in London knows about that evening unless, of course, you told someone.”
“Me? No. Certainly not,” she said, a bit indignant that he should even think she might tell on herself.
Brina hadn’t even mentioned the incident to her best friends, Adeline and Julia. Though, she had been tempted more than once to ravish them with details about her unexpected adventure and the kiss that had stolen her breath and her thoughts ever since. Now that she knew who he was, she would be even more tempted to tell them of her discovery in that chateau.
But there was no need to let him know that.
“Then our secret is safe.”
For now, she thought.
“I placed a wager in the betting book at White’s a short time ago, and after doing so, I realized it was only fair that I be the one to come over and tell you about it.”
Brina looked at him with almost as much inquisitiveness as she had the first time seeing him and smiled. “Why would your wagers be of interest to me, my lord?”
“Because this one concerns you.”
There was something challenging i
n his eyes. A curl of suspicion and nip of intrigue teased her chest as she watched his eyes rake down her face with way too much interest.
“I don’t understand,” she offered with an unintended bit of inquisitiveness edging her voice. “Whatever are you talking about?”
“It appears that I am in great need of something specific to show my family I can be responsible and not see the earldom of Blacknight come to ruin. My family is in a near state of panic because I have become the earl. The misfortune that happened wasn’t something any of us could have foreseen. Me least of all. Be that as it may, it comes with certain expectations.”
No doubt. They must be shaking in their collective boots. His reputation as a gambler was well known. He certainly knew how to pique her curiosity. “Again, my lord, I’m finding that none of what you have to say has anything to do with me.”
An attractive smile edged the corners of his decidedly masculine lips. “My uncles are convinced that a suitable bride would go a long way toward helping change me into the respectable head of the family I need to be and settling down all the strained nerves of the Blacknight lineage. I knew if anyone could do that for me, it would be you.”
“Me?” Her voice remained calm, though she was certain she wasn’t. “You can’t be serious.”
“Wholly serious. I wagered that you would accept my proposal of marriage and we’d announce our engagement by midnight at the last ball of the Season.”
A light-headedness flashed through her. Brina had no idea if she could believe he had actually done such a thing. “What nonsense you speak of.” She smiled, and then laughed a little, even though all traces of humor had left his face. He was sober, his eyes were steady and clear. Still, she added, “That’s preposterous, my lord.”
“Presumptuous, I’ll admit to. Why would you think it preposterous I’d want to marry you?” he asked with soft intensity to his tone and his expression.
With wary amusement and a determination to remain unruffled by his admissions, she offered sensibly, “Let’s start with the fact that you don’t know me.”
“I know all I need to about you,” he said without reservation. “You helped a stranger when he was in desperate circumstances and expected nothing in return. That speaks well of you, Mrs. Feld. So do my uncles. You are loyal, principled, and you’re even more beautiful without your mask.”
She felt uneasy about his praise and tactfully refrained from making a comment about it. “But what of you? Making a wager at a gentleman’s club is not the proper way to propose to a lady and let her know you want to marry her.”
“Which goes to my point,” he offered. “I need you by my side to help me become respectable. I need to know how to say and do all the proper things expected of an earl. You could do me the honor of accepting my proposal of marriage right now. If you will, the bet would then have no relevance, and I’d be well on my way to reassuring my family that I’m capable of doing something to please them and that all was not lost when I became the earl.”
This wasn’t a foolhardy trick he was playing on her. He was serious. Because of that, she had to be serious too. “I have no intentions of marrying anyone,” she said willfully. “Now, nor ever. When your uncle told you my name, he should have also told you that. It’s not a secret.”
He nodded slowly. “Though it’s been a few years, I remembered your story. I know how you became a widow, about the school behind this house, and the friends who helped you start it.”
“Yes. Perhaps what you don’t know is that I am quite content in my unwed state. I don’t know why you would do something so wild and reckless as to make a wager such as this. It’s most extraordinary. Why not be prudent and simply pick from any number of young ladies who entered the marriage mart last week and would be more than willing to marry you?”
“I’m not a sensible person, Mrs. Feld.” He paused and took a step closer to her. “But I never make a bet I don’t intend to win.”
Not sensible? How many people would admit to such a thing? But it must be true. Look what he’d done. Brina stared all the more keenly at him, refusing to give in and indulge the gentle way her abdomen rolled and tightened in response to his nearness.
“You have all the qualities of a good person that I don’t have,” he continued in the same calm tone. “We are a perfect match.”
Anger began mixing with disbelief and shock. Her courage strengthened. “What?” Brina bristled and stood her ground. “How can you say such a false statement so innocently? We are not a perfect anything.”
“I believe we are.”
“No,” she argued forcibly, as her arms stiffened at her sides. “We’re complete opposites.”
“Which will make for a very stimulating life between us. I am the blackguard of the ton, and you are an impeccable, saintly widow who’s loved by all.”
“Saintly,” she whispered as if the word were vile.
It pierced her like a dull dagger. She felt the familiar weight of heaviness in her chest whenever she was reminded of her past. It pained her that anyone thought her such a good person. She wasn’t. Grief, she’d found, could lessen, but guilt was a much heavier burden to lighten. It was a weight that never truly went away. She looked up at the earl, knowing he had no idea the haunting memories his words sent rushing back to her. Memories she decided long ago would never leave her.
“Some may think that,” she said softly. “But let me assure you, I am not flawless. Others may not know it, but I do.”
His brows drew together in concern. “My words troubled you. I didn’t mean for them to.”
His perceptiveness unnerved her, and she lowered her head so he couldn’t see more of her pain. She was beginning a new, stronger, and better life that was free of her past, her hurts, and her faults. She wasn’t going to let this rogue and his shenanigans done for his own purposes upset her plans to move forward.
“You trouble me. I need you to leave, my lord,” she said, shaking off the bewildering feeling of his sudden appearance and his revelation of what he wanted. “You have no right to come into my life and disrupt it in such a fashion. I want nothing to do with any of your nonsense or wagers. Nothing to do with you. I have my friends, the girls at the school, the women at the abbey, and other responsibilities that need my attention.”
“I need your help too, Mrs. Feld.”
“What? No. Furthermore, I don’t need you.”
He remained calm but seemed to study on her words for a moment before he shrugged so effortlessly she almost missed it. “Whether or not you will agree to marry me at the end of the Season doesn’t need to be settled now. The fact that you will allow me to court you so you can help me with all the proper things an earl should do will help appease my family’s disposition.”
“Oh, so that is it,” she whispered, suddenly more irritated than troubled and not afraid to let it show. Her head tilted up. “What a beast you are! Once again, you expect me to come to your aid and free you from a problem you’ve gotten yourself into. Well, I can’t help you with this one.”
His steady gaze didn’t waver. “You are the only one who can.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said, folding her arms across her chest defiantly. “If you want to become a better person and act like an earl, hire someone to teach you. You don’t need to court or marry anyone to learn how to put aside your bad behavior and say and do the right things by people, or to be a proper gentleman. You are the reason you misbehave, and no one can fix it but you.”
“I am not doing this simply because you will be a mere convenience for me.” He shifted his stance and lowered his voice. “There’s more to why I chose you and you know it.”
A shiver of something she didn’t quite understand and didn’t know if she wanted to chilled her. “What do you mean?” she whispered cautiously, unsure what he might say.
“There is the matter of attraction between us.”
A warmth of fluttery sensations swirled in her lower stomach once again. His words w
ere softly spoken, almost beguiling her with their honesty. Despite her anger at what he’d done, anticipation tightened her breasts. He moved even closer to her, invading a space she never allowed gentlemen to enter. With the tips of his fingers, he gently lifted her chin. His touch seared her with the desire to fall into his arms when what she should do was jerk away from him. It was impossible to keep her insides from trembling with expectancy as she looked into his deep blue eyes.
“It needs no explanation. You feel it as surely as I do,” he said huskily.
Yes, she did but she didn’t know why. He was considered a rake by everyone.
“You know what it is,” he continued in that seductive tone that washed over her like healing warm water. “That unidentifiable feeling of interest that stirs, swells, and draws us to another person. It feeds us, fills us, and eventually overtakes our thoughts, our senses, and our lives. It makes us want to know everything about the person.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about,” she insisted, dismayed that she knew exactly what he was describing. “There is no such thing,” she fibbed to the rogue with only minimal regret. If a man was so uncouth to say such things to a lady, she shouldn’t be expected to answer truthfully.
“Deny it if you must, but it’s there.”
Brina moved her face from his touch but put no distance between them. “Even if I were to consider your outrageous proposal, which I’m not, what would be the benefit to me other than to have my name tarnished as much as yours?”
“If we were to marry, a home. Children.”
Yes, most ladies wanted that even above love from their husbands. She smiled and tilted her chin up again, confident in her answer. “I have a home, my lord. You are standing in it. I have children. Ten of them I can see every day in the school behind this house.”
“Then I agree there’s not much I can offer you.” The inflection in his tone was conciliatory but not defeated. “No doubt a gentleman would take you at your word and not impose on your sensibilities further. However, we know I’m far from a gentleman. And because of the brief time we spent together earlier in the year, I know that you are cautious, but also curious. Intelligent, but eager to learn new things. And I believe you are more free-spirited than you want anyone to know. If nothing else, I can promise it would be an adventure filled with passion if you were married to me.”