by Poss, Bryant
“While the others fought off an attack.” The click of his heels stopped, and he turned to look at her in the dim light of the hallway. The sound of their blocked pokies could be heard in the background.
“I don’t doubt that story at all,” he crouched on his haunches to get a better angle on her eyes. “Actually, I got out the same way.”
“Doug helped us,” looking down at her feet now. “He helped us, but he didn’t make it. Frank helped us too, but they caught him.”
“Oh,” Ben seemed to drop some of his aggression at that. “Well, these are good people. They are some of the people left in the world, real people. He is not. Do you understand? He is not a real person. In a world filled with monsters, he is one of the worst.”
They looked at each other for several minutes, only the groans of the pokies they had trapped in the lobby area filling the silence.
“Of course,” she said, meeting his gaze, and he just looked at her as if he were playing cards, waiting on a tell. “You think, Ben—you think that since I spent so much time with him, I felt something for him. I trusted him in some way.” She locked eyes with him, full of confidence. “I did it for them. I did it for the others. The more time he spent with me, the less he spent with them.”
“I see,” he said then turned and made his way toward the cafeteria but hesitated for a moment, looking down as if embarrassed. “I never thought of that.”
The stainless-steel kitchen area was still one of the cleanest places in the building. One of the first protocols that Cillian had told her and Devon was that food accountability was something that Lotus took quite seriously. This was a large school equipped to feed over a thousand students a day, and there was one thing they had plenty of for the time being, and that was food. Judging by how well-stocked the place was, the delivery trucks must have just dropped off before the world went to hell. There had been of course a great deal of refrigerated food, mostly meats and processed foods like ready-made pizza that could not be salvaged. All those foods had been disposed of in the back of the building to avoid the smell. There were however even more canned goods than anything else, and that was one of the biggest blessings about this location. Industrial size cans of corn, potatoes, peas, beans, and smaller sizes of okra, tomatoes, and peppers filled the storage spaces in the metal kitchen. There was enough bread to choke a herd of elephants, as well as peanut butter and jelly. The ever-popular Rice Krispies still remained, with barely a dent having been made in that supply, and powdered eggs, oatmeal, and grits needed only water and a little heat. The gas stoves worked by hooking the line to portable propane tanks, and they had made use of them often since setting up here. Ben grabbed one of the knives from the wooden block against the wall, the one that looked like a Michael Meyers special, and set it on the counter with a clink. A manual can opener was taken from a drawer to open one of the cans of potatoes. He motioned for Alice to get some bread and put it on the counter. When she stepped toward him with the loaf, his face had lost it original hardness.
“Alice, there’s something I’ve got to ask you, and I really don’t know what else to do but come out and say it. The reason I got caught the second time was because I was looking behind the locked door in Marshal’s room.” He paused and waited for her to volunteer an explanation, but nothing came. “I was looking at what appeared to be some sort of playroom.”
“We were taken out pretty regularly,” her voice was sharp, defensive. She didn’t want to sound defensive, but she didn’t really know how to proceed. “You didn’t know everything that went on, Ben. No one knows everything that goes on their but him. Kids get taken out sometimes. They use us to go through places previously searched, police stations, grocery stores, pharmacies, anywhere that had important stuff. We go in and check everywhere, even places grownups can’t fit.”
“All the children are important to him. Boys are important to him too,” she dropped her head at this, unavoidably embarrassed. “It’s not just the girls. Anyway, he sends us out in the trucks to get things. We can’t stay in cages and in his room all the time. He likes us healthy. The room—the room was something else.”
Her ears rang with the silence that followed, but all she could do was look at him. Ben would not avert his eyes, and she could feel the irresistible urge to look down, look away, anywhere but at him. Her face became flush, and she waited for as long as possible to see if he would let it go, but it was a futile effort. He was prepared to stand there all day.
“Class is in session,” it came out as little more than a whisper, and it drew him forward with a turned ear. “Class is in session.” Her voice bounced along the steel and concrete like a rubber ball, and he stood back while she wiped the tears from her cheeks and composed herself.
“Marshal is a smart man, Ben. The way he gets people to do what he wants is to make them think he’s right or that he has the best ideas.”
“There’s force involved,” Ben replied then he shook his hand at her and prompted her to continue.
“The room was a classroom, at least that’s what he told everybody. Kids need education, he would say. We can’t fall back into the dark ages in every way. We were taken there daily, but not together, not all of us. Kids learn better with individual attention, he’d say. He’d take two of us in and have us sit in the desks first. We would read, and he would help us. That’s true enough. It’s like he needed time to feel like he was really teaching us at first. He would even get mad at us if we couldn’t do something right. We worked out of textbooks, math, science, literature, the whole thing. Actually, I probably learned more in one session than a week in regular school.” She sobbed at that and wiped at her nose. Ben stepped to the sink bringing back a roll of paper towels and handing them to her. Alice nodded in response as she cleaned herself up, but Ben watched her. She could feel how he watched her.
“After some time, some days longer than others, he would get us to rotate through the different sections like we did when we were little kids. We’d have to play house in the kitchen section, teach each other like one little teacher to the student in the reading section then the blocks. He would watch from the corner never saying a word. We would go through with whatever he said, sometimes forgetting he was even there. Sometimes he’d just watch the whole time, never moving, just telling us when to rotate. Other times, he’d say it. We’d wait for the words to come.” She wiped her face again, but no sobs came. “Can I play? He would say before walking over to one of us or both of us. Can I play? He would usually say with a smile, honey in his voice. You didn’t even have to look up to know how happy he was.” She wiped her face again, and he watched. Ben watched the tears run and the nose with it. This was genuine. This was real. She looked at him and opened her mouth, and he held up a hand.
“You don’t ever have to talk about that again if you don’t want to,” he said, reaching out to touch her in comfort then thinking better of it. He just stood there looking at her, trying to hold her gaze. “If you don’t want, you never have to talk about it again. You can talk to Lo if you want. It doesn’t matter. I’m sorry, Alice, I had to know. You’ve got to understand that. The hold he gets on people—I had to know how you were doing. I wanted to make sure you were alright. I can’t risk anything happening to these people, to you either.”
“We really did get away during a skirmish,” she whimpered with a bit of a giggle. “They liked to stop and kill pokies with different weapons. I think they jumped on more than they could handle once.” Her giggle was turning into a laugh, and he couldn’t help but join her. “I honestly didn’t even know Doug was planning it. I almost asked him not to do it at first, not to risk running.”
“I guess it is the most believable story after all,” he said, and they sat in silence, talking only occasionally about times gone by as he made the dinner.
By the time they returned, Lotus was sitting up, at least on one elbow, and Ben put down his provision in order to reach her. She looked at him, the relief on her face anew, and s
he pulled him to her, bringing his lips to her neck and kissing his in turn.
“This isn’t a movie,” she whispered. “I haven’t brushed my teeth in some days.”
“You haven’t bathed either,” he replied, shoving his face into her neck and breathing in audibly, “I can solve that for you with a little help from these guys.” He motioned to the others who nodded their heads in unison, and they looked on with nothing but relief in their eyes and questions in their hearts.
. . .
Alice and Devon were able to procure more than enough soap, shampoo, and conditioner from the girls’ locker room while Ben and Cillian used maintenance hand trucks to move one of the tubs from the sports therapy room to the main building. They had crossed over to the smaller building to get the goods, but it was worth it, as they found plenty of personal hygiene items to put them solidly in a state of relief. They worked hard with a new vigor seeing Lo in her recovery, and after a couple of hours, Ben and Cillian both decided that the kitchen was the place for the metal tub since that was where the water would have to be heated anyway. Using bottled drinking water was out of the question, but the barrels that had been set up underneath the storm drains some weeks earlier thanks to their foresight, had filled to capacity and then some. No use could be made of water that overflowed the containers, so they transported it, again using the hand trucks, to the kitchen in front of the gas stove where Ben set up the monstrous pots to warm. Once he started pouring them into the tub, he gave Cillian a wink.
“I’ve got it from here, brother,” the boy’s face blushed a little from the statement, but Alice was there to take his arm and lead him away from the kitchen, back to the room they had made their home.
“Wait,” Lotus said with a strong voice that surprised everyone. “Who’s got my Luck?”
Hesitating a moment, Alice dug deep in her pants pocket and pulled the ball out to the relief of her thigh. She held it up for a moment and placed it on the steel counter where it rolled a few inches before settling on one of the many tiny divots of its body.
“Thank you,” Lo managed with far less strength than before, and the girl gave her a nod before continuing to lead Cillian back to the room. The boy fought the urge to turn around at every step.
“You ready for a hot bath, honey?” he asked Lo, helping support her against the counter.
“Oh my god, is that a serious question?” she asked, gently pushing him away as she began unbuttoning the fly of her jeans. After two full minutes of the cumbersome effort, he raised his eyebrows to her and stepped forward.
“You don’t have to be such a hard ass,” his voice was playful, and she didn’t fight him as he helped her unbutton the pants, pull them past her hips, and slide them down her legs.
“Those panties got to go too, babe,” she said with the best grin she could muster.
“Just waitin’ for the go ahead,” and he slid them off as well.
After a moment of fuss, he finally scooped her up in his arms and eased her down into the near scalding water of the metal tub. Curls of steam rose from the liquid like some exotic mountain pool, and she winced only for a second upon first contact before her face went limp with the display of sheer ecstasy as she was inched into the water.
“Don’t pass out on me,” he said as he got her to the neck. The pool was deep, meant for the person to keep upright by the strength of the arms on either side.
“Pleeeease,” she kept her eyes closed. “Just shut up and get in here so I can relax.”
Without another breath he was down to nothing, sliding into the painfully hot water as quickly as his body would allow until he got underneath her so she wouldn’t have to support herself. From here, he used a Styrofoam cup to begin washing her hair, doing everything in the order that she told him. Then she made him do it again.
Lo breathed deeply and asked him about everything he had told her before, about his capture behind the pharmacy, about the armory, Alice and Devon, the rest of the children who remained there, the spazzos that attacked each other. The water released much of its heat with the one-sided discussion, the skin on all four hands began to shrivel. She felt cleaner than she ever had in her life, and he followed with his own cleaning directly after. There was a human feeling in the water now, a civilized feeling, and they talked as if by candlelight with soft classical music in the background and wine glasses on the rim of the tub. They talked like they were back in the world, the room lit, the water hot, the food cooked. Neither wanted to leave, so they didn’t, and they sat in the water until it was lukewarm, and she leaned back kissing his lips that were behind her shoulder.
“Have you had fun playing mom?” He asked her softly, after the smack of their lips, and she drew back ever so slightly.
“Yeah right,” she answered, not wanting the pause to be awkward. “As if there are any kids around here.”
“Well, can’t ask too much of them, even if they are little adults now.” He said playfully.
“Do you have a plan?” She asked trying to change the subject without being too obvious.
“For the kids at the armory? No, I can only worry about so much,” his frivolity had waned now.
“Well, you have one less worry, now. I’m fine. So what’s the plan?”
“How well are you, really?”
“I can’t complete a decathlon, but I’m about a thousand percent better than I was. Painkillers and antibiotics will have me worth my weight in salt, especially with another night’s sleep. Stop stalling and tell me, what’s the plan for the armory? I know it’s holding your shoulders down.”
They let the sound of rippling water fill the air, the orgasmic aroma of soap and shampoo. Her neck and shoulders he rubbed to her moans before reaching over and under her breasts. She lay her head back on his shoulder and let him continue, nothing but the two of them in this shithole world. When the water was completely still, they could hear the echoing groans of one of the pokies in the lobby. He was thinking hard about her question, and she knew it, waiting patiently for him to answer.
“Initially I thought he’d expect me to come back, but now I’m not so sure,” he continued to massage her as he spoke. “He caught me last time, the Marshal as he likes to call himself. He caught me, and I got away from him again. For all he knows I got away myself, leaving the kids there. He’s probably confident now, sure that I won’t attempt it again. He’ll assume I’ll cut my losses and not take the risk again, since he’ll surely kill me next time. And he will, you know, he’ll kill me next time without hesitation.”
“Are you suggesting we cut our losses?”
“Hell no!” he sat up a little and she soothed him back down.
“I was just trying to get your attention.”
“No, I’m not leaving them,” he settled back underneath her, and she pulled his hands to her chest. “I just don’t know exactly what method to use. They’re coming here, make no mistake about it. This school hasn’t been cleared, and he’s sweeping everything he can manage until he can increase his force, his manpower. They will be coming here, be assured, and the decoy pokies you’ve planted most likely won’t keep them from coming in. Don’t get me wrong, that was a damn good plan, but look at the food in this place, the structure itself. He’s going to want to check it.”
“Are you saying we just give it to him?”
“I’m saying the days of pride and standing up to the man are over. It’s all survival now, and I don’t know about you but I’m happy as hell with what I’ve got, especially after we get those kids back.”
A gust of wind cupped the outside window, and they let the silence take hold of them again after that. He positioned himself to make her more comfortable, knowing she didn’t feel very well, and they lay listening to the world. There was a time when she wouldn’t have let herself allow so much, yield to such comfort, but as things were now with the world and with the infection that slowly depleted in her bloodstream, she didn’t care. She let him comfort her, let him grab her as he ple
ased, no games here. Every day, every moment was fought for, and if she could get any enjoyment in between, she would not deprive herself of it. Lying back, she let the water penetrate her already waterlogged skin and listened, enjoyed every second of the bath. God knew when the next one would come if there was one.
It was then that her thoughts turned to Cillian. She loved him, but she couldn’t love him like that anymore. There was no regret, no shame in her actions. The world was what it was, and they had both enjoyed it, her the teaching and guiding and him the immeasurable bliss. Alice had him now. Lo saw it in her every move, her every word. And he liked her too, and he could see her in a different way now. She was a gorgeous little thing, so why not lust for her? But what had she thought of that before Ben came back? She hadn’t like it. She hadn’t liked it at all. At that time, Alice was a threat to her satisfaction. Such a selfish creature I turned out to be. Now was the time for her to make things right. As long as Cillian had Alice, there would be nothing but happiness to be enjoyed. Now all they had to do was get the others.
“I have an idea if you’re willing to listen,” her head stayed exactly as it was as she spoke to the ceiling above her. His only reply was to sit up and turn his ear.
18
The next morning they all watched by the rays of the new sun through the cracks of the metal door and the window in the office as Ben and Cillian prepared themselves, filling a backpack each with canned food, flashlights, and binoculars. Ben had one half of the walkie-talkie set in his hand, Lotus the other. No one said a word as they packed up, laced their shoes tight, and headed for the door to the hallway. Devon sheepishly looked on as Ben talked to Lo and Cillian talked to Alice. He wasn’t jealous. That wasn’t the word that applied, but it made him feel out of place until both Ben and Cillian came over to him and gave him a hug, asking him in his ear to keep an eye on the ladies, keep them safe. With that, he puffed up in the chest and nodded that he would, watching as the door closed behind them. Lotus had tried desperately to have them take Luck along, but Ben wouldn’t have it. He wouldn’t be able to concentrate, he said, unless she had it with her. After several minutes of deliberation, she conceded and placed the ball on the floor in front of her, filling in the eye and the black lettering as she waited. When the door was shut and locked, the footsteps gone on the other side, she looked at Alice and Devon left in front of her.