by Sotia Lazu
Woah. I hope the guy wasn’t a weirdo. “Who was he?” Better question than the shocked, And you just went with him? that rises to my lips.
He purses his lips and works his jaw, like he’s chewing on an idea. Then he says, “Have you heard of Chaos and Nyx?”
It takes my mind a second to follow that bend. “I know they’re primordial beings, according to Greek mythology, but I don’t remember much else.”
“Nyx—night—was created by Chaos according to the mythology I was taught, but in truth, the two of them were a bonded couple.”
In truth?
Hephaestus hears the question before I have time to voice it, and chuckles. “Yeah—well—I happen to have heard the actual truth from the mouth of Chaos himself.”
Okay. “That’s... freaking me out. I mean, Greek gods always had human characteristics in my mind. Of course, the supernatural aspect is incredible, and”—my cheeks burn—“so is all you can do with your powers.” Cazzo, I’m wet again. “But Chaos’ nature is so outside our world, it’s scary to think that it—”
“He.”
“—exists.”
Hephaestus runs his fingers through my hair. “He exists, and he’s the one who raised me and my brothers. He prepared us all. He had to, because his soulmate was set on using our powers to end the world.”
I sit up straight and study his face. “You are messing with me, yes?” The shock has pushed proper English syntax out of my head.
His eyes are downcast, as he says, “I’m afraid I’m being perfectly honest. Nyx went after some of my brothers. I think maybe she came after me as well, and that’s why my parents left me. You know—to save me?”
The flickering hope in his voice is extinguished by the time he utters the last word. I hear his doubt as clearly as if he spoke it out loud. If they meant to save him, why abandon him?
Two betrayals, both by people who meant the world to him. It’s too early for me to swear undying love, but the oath is at the tip of my tongue. He needs to know his heart will be safe with me.
Then something else he said sinks in, and a chill runs down my spine. Us all.
Of course he’s not the only Olympian god around. And oh my God— “You mean Hades was the Hades?” Bile rises up my throat. “Sylvia pinched the cheeks of the god of death?” My voice comes out shrill.
“Don’t worry.” Hephaestus gives my fingers a reassuring squeeze. “He doesn’t have his powers yet. Not that he’d hurt someone over that, even if he did.”
Phew.
I shift to drape my legs across his. “Could Chaos have arranged for you to be reborn?”
His shrug jostles my head. “I used to think he told us everything, but now... It’s possible, I guess.”
The stiffening in his body shows he doesn’t feel like talking about it. Can’t blame him. If the man who raised him kept something like this from him for so long, it’s a third unfathomable betrayal.
I want to hold him tight enough to put his broken pieces back together.
“You don’t have to fix me.” He lifts my chin with one finger and studies my face. His lips don’t move when he says, “You just have to—” The rest of his thought is shielded.
“What?” I think at him. “Leave you alone?”
He bites his lips together. “I don’t know anymore.”
I clutch his T-shirt with both hands and climb on top of him. “Good. Because I’m not going anywhere.”
Chapter Sixteen - Hephaestus
SHE DOESN’T KISS ME. She sits there, core hot against my straining cock, and doesn’t move. Just looks at me.
And I swear I hear the bond solidifying. Tugging us closer together.
Nothing’s changed, though. I’m not good enough for her, she’s not acting of her own free will, and fate has obviously fucked up. I should make her leave.
But I don’t fucking want to. It may be the most selfish I’ve ever been, but I want Laura here. Need her weight on top of me. Grounding me.
Fuck. If I remembered who she was to me in my first life...
I do; I just don’t like it. Because if she’s the woman form my fractured memories, she betrayed me with Zeus, and losing her crushed everything good in me. Which means she wasn’t mine then and isn’t mine now.
“We need to find Cassandra,” Laura says, pulling me out of my head so fast, I get whiplash. “Any clue where we should start looking?”
I shake my head. “Chaos should be able to locate her. Don’t know if he’ll be willing to, though.” Assuming my best-case scenario is true, and my parents left me for my own good, this mystery woman helped them hide from Nyx. She may know things Chaos doesn’t want my brothers and me to find out. “My brothers—the ascended ones, who have their powers—could help.”
Finding my parents is a huge enough deal that even Ares will help if I ask nicely. Hell, now that he’s bonded and happy, I probably won’t even have to be too nice about it. If he can drag his ass out of Valhalla and away from Freya long enough, when he hasn’t done so to track down his own folks. I’d rather not ask for his help anyway, so I turn to the guy who’s been my big brother since he and Chaos blinked me out of that last foster home.
“Sei,” I call in my head. “When you can, please come find me. I need your help.”
I adjust Laura in my arms so her ass is covered, and say, “Don’t freak out, okay?”
“Why would I—”
“What’s wrong?” Sei’s voice booms in my office, before he materializes from the ether—or more likely, his London office, where he and Irine play house this week.
Laura eeps and jumps a little, but there’s no full-out freakout flowing my way through our mental link. She looks over her shoulder at Sei’s imposing, besuited figure. “One of the ascended ones, huh?” she thinks at me.
“He’s the great Poseidon,” I reply the same way, making sure my mental voice sounds appropriately sarcastic. She rolls her eyes, and I laugh and help her to her feet. When was the last time I laughed so many times in a single morning? Or a single week?
As I stand beside her, I feel as if I was just busted going to second base with my high-school girlfriend, not simply sitting on a couch with my soulmate in my lap, both of us fully clothed.
Sei’s eyes sparkle. “I’m glad you changed your mind,” he says.
“He hasn’t.” Laura jumps in before I have time to talk. “I’m chipping away on his defenses, though.”
Sei frowns. “You aren’t planning on bonding with her?” he asks me.
Again, she answers in my stead. “Not even a little bit. And yet, he’s told me who he really is. Crazy, right? I could go to the press, but they’d think I’m nuts.”
My brother’s eyes widen comically when I chortle. I don’t make such silly sounds. “It’s the bond,” I offer meekly. “It’s messing with my mind.”
He grins—he didn’t use to do that either, till Irene stomped into his life. “And hallelujah for that.”
“Are you allowed to say that?” Laura asks.
Sei’s grin widens. “I like her.”
“Then talk to her,” she says and holds out her hand. “I’m Laura.”
“Sei.” He gives it a firm shake. “Will you tell me why I’m here, Laura, or can my brother string a sentence together?”
I totally can. “Need you to find a woman for me.”
Sei looks from me to Laura and back again. “What’s wrong with this one?”
Nothing, except that she’s too perfect. I hide the thought from her, but Sei must pick it up, because his eyes soften. “Tell me whom you’re talking about.”
“Laura opened the box.” I point at her. “My cube. It was a box. I was right.” Not important at the moment, but it should be mentioned. To Laura, I say “I told you I didn’t have any powers till I did the flame thing, but it’s not absolutely true. I’ve always been able to tell how things work. There hasn’t been anything I couldn’t fix or operate except for that stupid cube, and I’ve tried it daily, ever since I ca
n remember myself.” I expect to hear confusion in her thoughts, but she starts working on the new info like she would on a puzzle, looking for the pieces that make up the frame. While she ponders that, I tell Sei, “There was a note inside. From my parents. I think. Anyway, it just read, Find Cassandra.”
“Who’s Cassandra?” Sei asks.
I know my anger is misplaced and completely unreasonable, but I can’t hold out a barked, “I don’t know who the fuck she is. That’s why I fucking called you.”
He gives me a how-fucking-dare-you-speak-to-me-that-way glower, jaw clenched. He may no longer be the head of our Pantheon, but he’s still my big bro.
I hold his gaze, although I feel like a douche of Ares’ magnitude.
When Poseidon speaks again, his voice is sweeter than honey. “So you want me to locate her, knowing just her first name?”
“Can’t you—I don’t know—scry for her?” Laura asks. “Like they do in movies?”
Sei snaps his gaze her way. “Witches do it in movies. Do I look like a movie witch?”
Without missing a beat, Laura says, “You don’t look like an ancient god either. Appearances can be deceiving.”
“Even if I were secretly a witch and knew how to do that, don’t we need something of hers?” Sei asks. Laugh lines frame the corners of his eyes, and I feel an odd mixture of pride and possessiveness. Laura is awesome and fun, but I’m not sure I like other men knowing about it.
She picks up the box, closes it carefully, and holds it out for him to take.
“You said the message inside was from your parents,” he tells me, not reaching for it. “As far as we know, Cassandra never even touched this.”
Laura gives it a little shake. “Even better. Hephaestus hasn’t been able to open it, despite his power, which means someone put a spell on it, or whatever can block an Olympian’s powers. You should scry for that person. If it’s not Cassandra, odds are it’s Hephaestus’ mother or father.”
With a half-smile, Sei finally takes the box. “Good thinking. But we still need to figure out the scrying part.”
“We’ll need a map.” Laura rounds my desk. When Sei and I don’t follow, she waves impatiently. “Well? Come on.” She motions for Sei to sit in my chair—which may feel a little violating—and pulls me closer by my wrist. “Switch on your PC. Find a global map.”
“We’re gonna scry online?” I ask. “Isn’t that called googling?”
Her eyeroll would put Aphrodite herself to shame.
I’ve had that thought before. About someone else.
The woman in the red chiton.
Any hint of levity disappears, as a fist made of white-hot steel clenches in my gut. Pain. Betrayal. The woman I love, in Zeus’ arms.
And she finally has a face. As I feared, it’s Laura’s face. Almost. Her eyebrows are thicker, her cheeks fuller, and her hair so long, Zeus wraps the tresses around his hand as he leans in for the kiss that broke my heart.
Love will never break your heart again.
Damn right, it won’t. ’Cause I won’t let it in my heart.
I don’t return Laura’s flirty smile, as I brush past her to enter my password and open my browser. Then I step back and let her close in on Sei. It offers me a great view of her ass and legs, but I can’t enjoy it, knowing what I know. She was the woman I loved before. The one I loved first. The one who didn’t choose me.
Centuries have passed since, but the ache in my chest is fresh. And it hammers in the truth I came close to forgetting when she was falling apart in my arms.
Strengthening bond or not, Laura can’t possibly be my soulmate. The sooner I accept that fate has made a mistake, the better it will be for all of us.
Chapter Seventeen - Laura
I’M IN THE PRESENCE of not one, but two Greek gods, and if I think of it too hard, I’ll panic. Panic hinders rational thought, though, and I need to think. Just not of the two Greek gods within touching distance. One of whom is the reason my inner thighs are sticky with my juices, and the other I practically barked orders to.
Not of how hot Hephaestus looks, or the darkness he started emanating just before he locked me out of his thoughts, seconds ago.
I point to the screen and tell Poseidon—Fucking Poseidon, god of the seas—“Find a world map.”
He follows instructions surprisingly well. “Now what?” he asks.
Wish I knew. “Umm... focus on the box?”
He looks from the screen to the box in his hand. “What am I looking for?”
“Its history.” Hephaestus’ voice is a growl that perks my nipples. What’s more arousing is the way his mind works. And how big and bulging his body is. And his eyes, like black holes, sucking me in.
He clears his throat. “Black holes? Seriously?”
“I’m not a poet,” I snap back at him.
“Pardon?” Sei raises startled eyes my way.
Cazzo. Hephaestus spoke through our link, and I responded aloud.
“Nothing. Thinking out loud.” I throw Hephaestus a glare over my shoulder, but his grin mellows me instantly.
“Focus,” he says to his brother. “Try to see the box’s past.”
“As in, anyone who’s touched it?” Sei asks. “Ever?” From where I’m standing, I clearly see his eyeroll, though Hephaestus can’t. “And how the fuck am I supposed to do that?” Sei sounds annoyed. At the request, or at his inability to fulfill it?
Hephaestus steps up behind him and places both hands on Sei’s shoulders. “Close your eyes. I’ll try to channel my ability to you through our link.”
Sei frowns but cups the box between both hands and squeezes his eyes shut. “Okay. I’m thinking of how much I want to know everything there is to know about this. Do your thing.”
Hephaestus drops his head forward, his eyes closed too. A shiver rattles his frame.
I clasp his wrist. It’s meant to reassure him. Remind him I’m here for him, whatever he finds out. I’m certainly not prepared for the world to drop beneath my feet.
I have this sense of falling—like when you feel your feet slip beneath you even as you lie in bed—although part of me is aware of the solidness of the floor beneath my feet. I dig my nails in Hephaestus’ hand to right myself, and force open eyes I didn’t know I closed.
We’ve somehow gone from Hephaestus’ office to a wide room, surrounded by walls and pillars made of the same veined marble as the floor beneath my sneakered feet. “Where are we?” It’s a whisper, because I’d rather whoever lives in this place doesn’t know we’re here.
Hephaestus flicks his wrist so his humongous palm is wrapped around mine. “It’s not where; it’s when.”
He doesn’t need to explain. I see the answer form in my head. We’re in the past. His past. Che palle! I look down at myself. I’m wearing the skirt and T-shirt I left my hotel room in. Hephaestus is in jeans.
“If someone sees us, they’ll know we’re not from here. I’d hate to unwittingly mess up the past.” Bad things can come of that, as Marty McFly’s adventures have taught us. Things did turn out pretty damn well for him, but he had Doc’s assistance. Who’s our Doc, who’ll make sure we get back home safely?
“They can’t see us. Fuck. You need to see this, though.” Sei’s voice drifts to us from an opening up ahead and to the right. Phew. He’s our Doc.
So I’m Marty? I’m too tall to be him. And possibly a little in shock, if this is what I’m thinking about. My pulse is elevated, and my breath comes out in short bursts.
Hephaestus heads toward his brother’s voice, dragging me after him.
I scurry to match his steps. “Hold on. What’s the hurry?” Can’t we strategize before running off to whatever’s on the other side of this wall?
“This is it. The moment I’ve been dreaming of.” The anger in his voice doesn’t match his words.
Is something lost in translation? “Dreaming of it? Like, you’ve been hoping to see it?” I ask.
We cross the opening—a threshold—and exit to
a gorgeous garden, filled with flowers of all colors. Their aroma is familiar. Not paying much attention to where I’m going, I stumble over a root as Hephaestus takes a sharp left turn. I find my footing a hairbreadth before I slam into... myself?
It’s a chubbier version, but she’s totally me, and calling for a long-haired Hephaestus, who’s giving her a fiery glower from across the room.
My Hephaestus pulls me back, and then drops my hand as if it burned him. Which would take a whole lot of heat, since he can burn things to ashes with his touch.
Is this the first me? But he said he loved her, and I don’t really see that in the daggers his eyes throw at her.
Ancient-Hephaestus strides toward us, shoulders squared and fists clenched. He’s limping, but it takes away none of the menace and determination emanating from him. His irises are totally silver, his gaze like liquid fire.
And said gaze isn’t trained on the woman, but on something behind her. Something I cannot see.
“Let her go.” He speaks Ancient Greek, and I understand him perfectly.
“This is wrong.” My Hephaestus sounds lost.
I tangle my fingers through his. He’s still for a heartbeat, but finally gives a tiny tug, instead of pulling away.
“How’s it wrong?” These two obviously can’t see us, but I keep my voice low.
He shakes his head, as if shooing an annoying fly. “It’s not how I remember it.”
“What do you remember?” Sei asks from Hephaestus’ other side.
I forgot he was here.
“I remember her”—Hephaestus doesn’t look at me, but at the other Laura, who probably isn’t called Laura—“and I remember the feeling of gut-wrenching betrayal. I remember the pain.”
Aetna. That was her name. My name, although I can’t think of it that way if I’m to maintain my sanity. Whatever floodgate kept me from remembering my first life has vanished along with Hephaestus’ 2020 auto shop, and shards of ancient memories keep jabbing at me. Aphrodite herself blessed my union with the god of fire when she brought me over from Sicily. She was as trapped in her marriage to Hephaestus as he was, and she wanted at least him to be happy. So she took me on as her handmaiden, and hid me and her husband from Zeus, who didn’t appreciate that I preferred his son over him.