by Cate Farren
The laughed as Saskia came back down to ground again. She showed her what else she'd learned, from turning everyday objects into sources of light to making her fingernails grow to a particularly effective spell that could boost a person's memory. Saskia felt like she was improving so much and it felt good to show off. It proved she could actually replicate the spells without much effort. What could she learn with time? Could she learn more complicated things? Could she raise people from the dead?
Could I bring Frankie back to life?
"So what do you remember?" Saskia asked. She shook off those thoughts. Even she knew that raising the dead was impossible, though her grandmother hadn’t mentioned it. “The memory spell should work. It made me remember the first time I walked. I almost fell down the stairs.”
CLOVER GRINNED. "I can remember my first birthday like it was yesterday!" She laughed, though it was awkward. The feeling of being a baby was there too. She remembered being scared and resentful that she didn’t have more mobility. “Mom had this tiny little birthday cake with a single red candle on it. Dad blew the candle out, and then Sheriff Trent came by. Darin was with him. He must’ve been about two. Darin that is, not the sheriff. The sheriff gave Mom a gift wrapped in this tacky blue paper. She opened it and inside was this beautiful pacifier.” Clover put her hand to her mouth, shocked. “I can taste the pacifier. It was like some horrible cheap plastic.”
“What a terrible first birthday gift,” Saskia complained.
Sheriff Trent was horrified that his gift had caused little Clover such discomfort. He’d left soon after that, dragging Darin with him. Clover had forgotten about it almost instantly, especially when the opportunity to breast feed came along. A mother’s milk could make you forget almost anything.
“I know!” said Clover. “The rest of the day I just sat there, watching my parents talk and watch TV. They kissed a bit, and then...and then...”
Clover’s eyes widened in horror.
“Did they start doing it?” Saskia asked. “Ew!”
Her friend shook her head. “No. Nothing like that. Mom just told Dad that she was three weeks pregnant.”
She shook her head, for a moment disbelieving the memory. So she accessed it again. It was fading now, the memory receding down a long corridor back to the parts of her brain she couldn’t reach, but she clearly heard the conversation properly. She couldn’t unhear it, not now.
“She must’ve had a miscarriage,” said Clover sadly. “I never knew.”
“You need to find out,” said Saskia. “This mystery is going to drive you crazy until you find out.”
Clover nodded. “Spell me again.”
Saskia couldn’t wait to try more memory retrieval spells, which was just as well. She was right. Clover needed to know what happened. She felt it might make her understand her mother a little better. She still hated the woman, but that didn’t stop her from wanting to know about her.
It took them two hours, but eventually Clover found out the truth. Lydia wasn’t pregnant. The test had been a false positive. They were sad, but vowed to never give up trying.
I feel sorry for them. I feel sorry for her.
How could the murderous vampire she became be the same vulnerable, kind person she was seeing in these memories? Did people really change that much?
“I’m fighting to hate her so much,” Clover admitted. “But the woman she was...”
“Your mother was cursed, and then became a vampire,” Saskia reminded her. “She went through a lot because of what my mother did to her. No wonder she flipped.”
“I know that. It’s just...She killed Jared. She...she killed Jared.”
The painful memories of that fateful day flooded back again. Clover refused to cry this time. She’d done enough weeping for a lifetime. She was stronger than this. She had to be stronger.
Don’t give in to the chaos. Use the chaos to your advantage.
“Mother?”
Jessica was wide awake, staring at Clover with deep concern. Clover smiled and patted the shapeshifter on her arm, trying to console her.
“Go back to sleep,” said Clover.
“I could feel your pain,” said Jessica. “It woke me up.”
Saskia gave Jessica an odd look before saying, “Perhaps you need a lullaby. Clover is a great singer.”
Clover glared daggers at her friend before trying to think of a lullaby. She couldn’t think of any. There was one at the back of her mind, something she glimpsed in the memories that Saskia had recently opened up, but it was unclear.
She grinned. “I know the perfect lullaby! Come on.”
Jessica smiled as Clover wrapped a warm fleece blanket around her. The shapeshifter closed her eyes, and Clover began to sing the theme tune to Friends. She watched it enough times on Netflix to know every word off by heart, and it seemed to do the trick. Pretty soon Jessica was fast asleep again.
“What was that?” Saskia asked, amazed.
“It was the theme tune to Friends,” said Clover, trying to sound as if it wasn’t a big deal. She was on the verge of tears. “You probably don’t remember it.”
“I do,” Saskia admitted. “I just didn’t know you could sing.”
Clover shrugged and went into the kitchen. It was only when she washed her face with cold water that she realized the Friends theme was the same lullaby her mother used to sing to her.
THE PORTAL OPENED, depositing the spy near the vegetable garden. Loki looked her up and down with disdain, wondering why she was naked and her face was painted with black make-up. She looked dead.
"What happened?" Loki asked.
He didn’t ask about the make-up. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know.
"Our beach-head at the vampire bar is no more," the shapeshifter announced. She looked down at her bare feet, repentant. "We were surprised when the daughter of Dracula and several other prominent figures turned up. We tried to kill them, and a fight ensued. It was chaos." She paused for a moment before adding, "Our enemies survived."
"That was unwise of you to attack, though I'm proud of you for trying to kill our enemies. You are warriors after all." Loki thought for a moment, imagining the look on Sutton's face. She was a hard one to pin down. "What of the other locations in Whitby we have infiltrated? Are they safe?"
The shapeshifter shook her head. "They are undisturbed, but maybe not for long. They know we’re there. They’ll be looking for us."
Loki nodded. This shapeshifter was intelligent, already thinking ahead. He could use them.
"Good,” he told her. She smiled. “Get back to them."
He was about to send her back when a thought occurred to him.
"Who else was there?" he asked.
"A vampire called Darin, and a vampire called Jared," the shapeshifter replied.
Loki nodded. "Good. You may go."
His soldier stepped back through the portal as Loki started to pace. He'd heard rumors that Jared had come back from the dead. He'd imagined the process would've taken a lot longer, what with him only having a quarter of Dracula's blood in his veins. If Clover were to find out her lover was alive she would leave and all he'd sacrificed for her would be for naught.
He knew Clover would never fight for him. He could make her sympathize with him as much as he wanted but the fact was she would always betray him. He'd been naive enough to think her blood ties to him would be enough. Loki knew he'd lost her the moment he saw the murderous glint in her eye when she was using him as a punch bag. Clover wanted him dead, and one day she was going to try and kill him.
"I should never have brought her here," he whispered.
Yet she was here, and he wanted to protect her. Not because she was sort of family, or he pitied her, but because...
He shook his head, the revelation startling him. Did he have feelings for Clover? Was he falling in love with her?
Chapter 26
It was a day later when Loki realized it was impossible but true. He loved Clover more than the universe i
tself.
He laughed. "Love..."
He walked up to the house and peered in through a window. He watched Clover and Saskia laughing together and for a minute his heart skipped a beat. She was so much like Chorda; emotional, sad, but immensely strong and loyal. He was always attracted to women who were feminine but powerful, who spoke their mind but knew when to keep quiet when it really mattered.
The war would tear her apart. If she didn't get killed in the fighting it would affect her emotionally. He was going to destroy her world, kill all her friends and family. She could never see him as anything but a monster. She would never love him. She could never love him.
They were fooling each other. She could never be on his side, and he could never have her. All this was pointless. Yet he could still do everything in his power to protect her. He had to keep her out of the war as much as possible. She was safe here. He had to make sure she could never leave, and that meant making sure her friend stayed here too.
"Hello," a voice said.
Loki was surprised. It was Jessica. She was standing by the door, staring out at the Primordial Womb. Most of the shapeshifters did that. Even he found himself staring into it for hours at a time, just thinking about the universe. Jessica was also the key to keeping Clover here.
"How do you feel?" Loki asked.
"I find I am unable to sleep for long periods," she confessed. The notion seemed to distress her. "Sleeping is difficult."
He nodded, understanding. He hadn't slept in hundreds of years. He'd learned to cope without it. His shapeshifters needed sleep, though. They couldn't function properly without it. He'd tried to teach them how not to sleep, but it seemed to be some biological imperative in all living things, including ones he'd created himself.
"Seek out Clover," Loki advised. "She is your mentor. She must teach you."
Jessica nodded. "Yes."
The shapeshifter walked away, leaving Loki to ponder on Clover once again. She would betray him, but he couldn't allow any harm to come to her. He had to keep her here, keep her safe.
If she finds out I'm planning to attack Dracula's compound she'll kill me.
Dracula was the next stage of his plan. The head vampire himself, the self-appointed leader of the supernatural world, had to die. Everyone in his house had to die. Every idiotic vampire royal at the vampire summit had to die. He’d been seeding Whitby with shapeshifters for six months. The plan was almost ready. He’d even managed to fix it so all Dracula’s children ended up staying with him, through his schemes to frame them for murder. It was all going so smoothly. Jared turning up was a shock, but his arrival actually helped things along. His intervention would actually convince Dracula even more that an attack was imminent. The focus would be totally on Whitby. They could never imagine that’s what he wanted, and that the real threat was elsewhere.
SASKIA CONTINUED TO stare at the puppy. It was a different puppy from last time. This one was a pug, cute and tiny and flapping around in her arms. It wanted to be loved and she was supposed to murder it.
"Why are you having trouble with this?" Romily asked, exasperated. She stared at Saskia like she was an idiot. "It's a dog."
"Give me time," Saskia snapped. "I'm not a killer."
"Yes you are. I can see it in your eyes. You just need the courage to act."
The act was vile, but she knew her grandmother was right in one respect. If she was going to get them out of this place she needed to kill Loki. She had to take a life. She had the anger and resentment inside her. She could feel it now, even though she was happier than she'd ever been in her life. Perhaps it would always be there, waiting to climb out. Maybe she was destined to turn into a dark, twisted being like her mother and grandmother.
She took a deep breath and performed the spell. The puppy didn't even cry before it imploded into nothing.
"There," Romily declared. Her grin was triumphant. "That was easy."
Saskia shrugged. "I suppose it was. It didn't feel any pain."
"That's the beauty of the implosion spell. Your victims don't feel pain. If you want them to feel pain, you explode them with hatred."
Saskia looked at her grandmother, cackling with malice. The woman was a wicked witch, straight out of a fairy tale. She needed shoving into an oven or two. The world would be a much better place without her in it, contaminating it with her bile.
“Thank you for teaching me how to kill,” Saskia told her.
Romily patted her on the head. “You’re welcome.”
CLOVER WATCHED JESSICA. She was asleep in her bed, curled in the fetal position. She resembled nothing more than a giant baby.
"Sweet dreams," she whispered.
She knew Jessica would wake up again and go wandering. It was in her nature. The shapeshifter was restless, eager to learn new things, to make the most of her newfound sentience. It was like looking after a baby.
She heard Rose calling for her. Clover sighed and decided to see what the woman wanted.
"What is it?" she demanded.
Don't feel sorry for her. She brought this on herself.
"Close the door," said Rose.
Clover did as she was bid, though slowly, as if to show she couldn't quite be bothered. She enjoyed the look of disdain on the witch's face.
"Are you and Saskia friends again now?" Rose asked.
"We're stronger than ever," Clover confirmed.
Rose smiled, despite the pain she must be in. "Good. Look after her. Make sure she lives, that she doesn't end up like me or that thing that gave birth to me."
Clover nodded. This much she could do.
"Another thing." Rose leaned her head up, looking Clover in the eye. "Don't let Loki win. I can see what he's doing, manipulating you, giving you what you want. You can’t let him get in your head or it’s all over.”
“He’s not in my head,” Clover protested.
Rose saw right through her. “He already is.”
Clover marched up to the bed, angry. “He took me away from that asylum. He...” She put her hand to her mouth, repulsed by her own words. She fell on the bed, distraught. “I’m sticking up for him. He’s plotting to destroy the few friends and family I have left and I’m sticking up for him. What kind of person am I?”
“He’s charming, and the grievances he does have are legitimate. If someone killed the person I loved and tortured me for millions of years I’d want them all to burn too. But I don’t want my Saskia to live in that kind of world.”
“He’s too strong.”
Clover flinched as Rose’s withered hand took hers. She wanted to cry. She missed her mother so much it was like physical pain.
“Survive,” Rose pleaded with her. Her voice was gentle. “Survive.”
She stared down at the woman who had ruined her life. She should be angry. She should be beating her and reveling in her pain, but she could feel only pity now. At the very end Rose cared more for her daughter, and Clover herself surprisingly, than her own pain.
I can’t believe I’m going to do this, but for my own sanity, my own soul, I have to.
“I forgive you,” said Clover.
Rose smiled, drifting off to sleep.
CLOVER FOUND SASKIA sitting on her bed, practicing some sort of illusion spell. There were several white mice scurrying about in the air, chasing each other's tails. The mice didn’t have much definition to them. They were like cartoons.
"What use is this?" Clover asked.
"It's to entertain children or something," said Saskia. She seemed distracted, as if this simple spell was beneath her. "I'm not sure really."
"Look...You need to see your mom. I just talked to her. I don't think she has long left."
Can I smell wet dog in here, or is Saskia just unhygienic?
"She could heal herself if she wanted to," Saskia stated.
"I know, but maybe it's too late now," said Clover. "Saskia, just talk to her. Please."
Saskia crossed her arms defiantly. She glared at her with such malevolen
ce Clover actually stepped back. Something was wrong. Something had happened to Saskia since the last time they’d spoken. Had her grandmother done something during their lessons?
“Well?” Saskia demanded. "Since when were you my mother's bestie?"
"Since I decided life was too short to not forgive her," Clover answered.
Clover didn't know how long she'd live for. Shapeshifters were immortal. She was only half shapeshifter, so maybe she'd grow old and die in a few million years instead? The thought was actually quite daunting. Could she live for another million years without Jared? The past year had been agony without him.
I could meet someone else and have children. I could marry a thousand times and have a thousand children and thousands more grandchildren. I could...
The future seemed endless, eternally endless, without Jared. The only consolation she had was that she was carrying his child – a child whose existence could plunge the vampires into a war.
Shit. I’d almost forgotten that my blood could make vampires fertile.
She wanted to laugh. She had so many problems she was beginning to forget some of them.
“I want to make up with her,” Saskia admitted. “It’s just...”
“She’s a hard woman to like,” said Clover. “But she’s your mother.”
“Would you visit your mother on her deathbed if you could?”
Clover bit her lip. “This isn’t about me.”
SASKIA OPENED THE DOOR. It creaked. Her mother was in bed, her eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling. She didn't know what to say.
"Clover thinks you're dying," Saskia stated.
Rose coughed. "I'm not going until you're safe."
"Grandmother is..."
"Teaching you dark magic. Yes, I know. I can feel it."
She walked further in and looked around. There was an old carriage clock on as side table. It had stopped years ago. She picked it up and made it implode.
"I killed a puppy," Saskia confessed. She bit back the tears, trying to be as focused as Loki and her grandmother. “I...”