by Bella J.
He let out a laugh. “The fucking line I’m not supposed to cross when it comes to you.” He turned then looked up at the roof before dropping his gaze to mine. “Doe, you are the embodiment of my vice. Of the cross I have to carry every goddamn day of my life. And having you here is like opening a bottle of whiskey in front of a fucking alcoholic. It’s torture.”
Oh, God. I was causing him pain. Torturing him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” But just as I wanted to drop to my knees, to plead for forgiveness, I felt two arms wrap around me. In shock, I looked up at him, his face mere inches from mine. Suddenly, it felt like I couldn’t breathe, his touch almost electric against my skin. It was so different. Everything about him, about me, about everything surrounding us, was so different.
Silence fell over us, and all we did was stare at each other. I felt his warm breath against my cheek, caressing my skin. I wanted to say something, but I saw the warning in his eyes, and I knew my time for speaking freely had passed.
He traced the back of his hand down my face. “You will never fall on your knees again, Doe. Not unless I order you to. Do I make myself clear?”
I swallowed, my mouth dry and my mind a mess. But I managed to say the words, “Yes, sir.”
“Good.”
To my dismay, he stepped back, his arms no longer wrapped around my body. I didn’t know whether I hated it or not. Whether I wanted—needed his embrace or not. All I knew was when he turned his back on me and walked out the door, the sound of the lock echoing his exit, there was a part of me that wanted him to come back. For the first time in my life, I wanted my master to come back.
My legs felt weak, shaky. If it wasn’t for his latest command, I would have fallen on my knees right there.
I sucked in a breath and clutched my hands in front of my chest, glancing around the room. Earlier, I was too confused, too tired to notice anything. After Karina helped me clean up and the doctor checked my vitals again, sleep took me.
Left to right, my gaze swept across everything around me. There was the chair he had sat in earlier, the table where the quarter of a bottle of bourbon and his glass still stood. I looked over at the door, then back to the table, and hesitantly walked toward it. With gentle fingertips, I traced circles around the rim of the glass.
Master V used a glass almost exactly like this one. But his drink wasn’t a golden brown like the one Antonio drank. It was clear. Like water. I remembered him saying vodka when he ordered one of his housekeepers to refill his glass.
I glanced at the bottle and read out loud, “Bourbon.” Thank God Master V preferred his slaves literate and educated. He reminded me every day how he hated stupid bimbos with tits for brains.
“The professor tells me you’re struggling.”
I remained silent, my gaze settled on the floor.
“He says your writing isn’t improving.”
I watched his shiny black shoes as he paced up and down in front of me. I wanted to scream at him, ask how I was supposed to learn when my mind was nothing but a pit of darkness with echoes of despair. My body hurt. My heart hurt. Every breath I took hurt. But he expected me to focus, to learn?
“You know I don’t tolerate anything less than perfection. And that’s exactly the feedback I’m getting about the progress of your writing. Less. Than. Perfection.”
My face was covered with the long, dark, dirty strands of my hair. I imagined it being a veil, something that could hide me from the monster glaring down at me from his pedestal of evil.
Shivers spread down my spine, my skin assaulted and tormented by the cold. Another reason I couldn’t seem to get those damn letters perfectly between the lines and to distinguish the b’s from the d’s.
“You know how I feel about you being illiterate. How I despise stupid bimbos with tits for brains. Should I see your repeated failure to excel as a way for you to defy me?”
“No, Master.” I pulled my fingers back, my nails scratching against the cold floor as I balled my hands into fists.
“It’s been months. The professor is convinced you should have shown a certain degree of improvement by now. He even goes so far as to suspect dyslexia. Dyslexia!”
The rise of his cold, hard voice made me cringe. His simmering anger was starting to turn into rage. His rage meant pain for me. Tears and cries.
“I’m sorry, Master. I will try harder.” I would do anything if it meant sparing me the consequences of his wrath. The blue bruises from the last time he made his disappointment in my learning ability known was still painted on my ribs and flanks. Did he really think I would willingly put myself in position to deserve punishment?
His pacing stopped, and for a few seconds, there was only silence…until I heard the crack of a whip as it landed on the cement floor. Tears already burned my eyes, my mind searching for words I could say in a bid for him to show me just the smallest amount of mercy.
“I promise I will try harder. I will not disappoint you, Master.” A tear escaped and fell to the floor, staining the cold cement with my fear and heartache.
Then he started to pace again, another crack of the whip. I shuddered. I cried. My skin was already burning with anticipatory pain while my stomach twisted into painful knots of dread.
“Hold out your hands.”
“Please. Please. I’ll do better.” I couldn’t stop pleading. I didn’t want to be punished.
“Hold out your hands.”
Cries ripped through me, my tears allowing the dark spot on the cement to grow. “Please—”
The whip sliced through the air, the sound snapping right next to me as it landed on the ground. “Hold out your hands!” He yelled so loud, so abruptly, I relieved myself as fright possessed every muscle in my body. The warmth spread down my thighs, my knees, pooling around my pathetic frame as I remained on my hands and knees on the floor. The humiliation. The pain. The excruciating torture that was my existence threatened to tear my mind apart.
With shaky hands and a weeping soul, I held out my hands, keeping my head down. When the first lash struck, the thin leather of the whip sliced across the skin covering my knuckles. I cried out, but another strike broke the sound of my scream. It took every ounce of strength not to pull my hands back. To not try and protect myself from the pain.
Lash, after lash, after lash, Master V continued to strike my hands. The searing pain moved through my wrists into my upper arms, my strength withering with every hit. My fingers felt like they were being cut straight through the bone, the shocks of pain slamming against my fingertips.
Lash, after lash, after lash.
When I opened my eyes and looked down at the cement floor, I saw my blood join my tears, creating a picture of absolute misery and agony.
That day Master V mutilated my hands, the slice of his whip causing cuts so deep one could see the bone. And after he was done, he forced me to brace myself on my wounded hands while he defiled my body with deep, painful, torturous thrusts. But not before he gagged me, telling me that he was sick of hearing my cries.
With torn skin on my hands and a gag in my mouth forcing me to endure my pain in silence, Master V continued to torture my body for what seemed like hours.
That night he beat and raped me into being the professor’s best and brightest student.
A tear fell on the top of my hand, and I stared down at the white scars that still marred my skin. It happened a long time ago, long enough for the scars to have faded. But it was still there. It was there to remind me that nothing but perfection was acceptable.
The lock on the door clicked and I hastily placed the glass down. I turned to see Karina standing by the door with a tray in her hands.
“You’re up.” She smiled. “I hope you slept well.”
I shifted uncomfortably as I clutched my hands together.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m…I know you’re my new master’s sister, but I’ve never learned the right way to address…someone like you.”
“Someone like me?�
�� She stifled a laugh. “You can call me Karina. There’s really no need to be formal with me, Doe. I told you the other night that you don’t have to be afraid here. Okay?”
I nodded, my fingers nervously twining together.
Karina placed the tray down on the table and noticed the bottle of bourbon. “I see your master has been here.” There was a hint of sarcasm in her voice, and I had to wonder why. “Master,” she scoffed as if the word was completely absurd to her. “Here.” She lifted the silver dome from the tray. “The doctor said you’ll be able to eat now, but suggested that we start with something light since we’re not sure…well,” her voice grew soft, sympathetic, “we’re not sure what type of food you’re used to eating.”
I glanced down at the bowl, pieces with an array of colors mixed together.
Karina picked it up and held it out to me. “I thought a simple fruit salad would be a great way to start you off on a healthy diet.” The smile she gave me was warm, kind—exactly the opposite of what I was used to. And for the first time, there were two words I wanted to say—not because it was expected of me, or because I would be punished if I didn’t, but because I truly wanted to say it.
“Thank you.”
Another smile. “You’re welcome, Doe. Come, sit down. Eat.”
As I took a seat and stared at the bowl in front of me, Karina walked around the room. “I’ll have to talk to my brother about this. Now that you’re well again, I see no reason for you to stay in this room, all hidden and locked away.”
I looked up at her. “You will give me another room?”
“Yup.” She turned to face me. “And I’ll tell you what, I’ll let you choose the room you want. How does that sound?”
I swallowed hard. I couldn’t understand why she was so kind to me. What I did to deserve it. The smile on her face faded while her eyes turned from happy to sad.
“I’m sorry for what you’ve been through, Doe. I can only imagine the kind of horrors you’ve suffered, and no one deserves that.” She walked closer, clutching her hands in front of her. “I know this must all seem strange to you. A new place, all the new faces. But I promise you that no one will ever hurt you again.”
My gaze dropped to my lap. “He made the same promise.”
“Who did?”
“Your brother. He promised that Master V will never hurt me again.”
“Do you believe him?”
I shrugged. “Promises, lies, it’s all the same to me.”
“Doe, I know my brother can sometimes be a bit…unsympathetic. And God knows he and I, we have our fair share of differences. But he’s a good man beneath that hard exterior he flaunts so well. And one thing I know about him, he always keeps a promise.”
I struggled against threatening tears. My heart and my head were battling against each other. My heart wanted so much to believe the good in the world had finally found me. But my heart told me not to let my guard down, not to hope. Hope had the power to destroy everything.
“Anyway,” she clapped her hands together, “you eat and enjoy. I had some clothes sent over from the boutique for you. I’ll go get them.” She glanced around the room one more time. “And I’ll see what I can do to get you out of this goddamn prison.”
She smiled at me before turning and walking out the door.
My mind was reeling. I didn’t know how to cope with all the smiles and kindness. It was completely foreign to me, and I had no clue what to make of it.
The bowl of fruit remained untouched in front of me. My stomach grumbled. Hunger was something I knew too well. I also knew never to eat unless my master had commanded it. And even though Karina told me that I had nothing to fear, that I should eat, I couldn’t. I wanted to. I wanted to take the spoon and eat every last piece of fruit in the bowl. To taste the different flavors of all the different colors. But I couldn’t.
Tears slipped down my cheeks. My most basic instinct to eat when hungry was completely warped. It was beaten into submission just like I was. No matter how much I wanted to eat, I couldn’t rewire my mind to do so because…he didn’t give me permission.
Chapter 15
Antonio
Lucio tossed the file in front of me. “This is everything we got on this Vadik Volkof fuck.”
I nodded. “The girl?”
“We took care of it.”
“Good.” The last thing we needed was a corpse lying around for the feds to find and link to us.
Dante shook his head. “Still can’t believe the fuckers shot her right in the fucking open for the world to see.”
Lorik leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. “I don’t think these Russian sons of bitches care about who sees and who doesn’t.”
I picked up the file and opened it. “What did we find?”
Lucio took a seat at the other side of my desk. “Vadik Volkof, born in Perm, Russia, but owns multiple estates around Moscow. Billionaire who—according to the world—makes his money through his power engineering company inherited from his dead grandfather. ”
I cocked a brow. “According to the world?”
Lucio rubbed one hand around his fist. “His company makes millions, but he earns his true wealth by dealing in human trafficking.”
I grabbed a picture of the ugly motherfucker and closed the file while staring at the photo. Light hair. Middle-aged face. Super evil fucker.
“Basically,” Lucio shrugged, “if there was ever anyone we didn’t want to go up against, this fucker is it.”
“Did we find anything about Doe?”
“Nothing.” Lucio shifted in his seat. “There’s no link to Vadik that I can find. In fact, according to the world, this girl doesn’t exist.”
I tossed the picture on my desk. “Well, she’s important enough for him to want her back.”
“Is that an option?” Lorik stared at me questioningly.
“Is what an option?”
“Giving her back?”
“You’re kidding, right?
“I dunno, man. If this fucker is going to go around town killing people, I don’t think we have much of a choice in the matter.”
“It’s not an option,” I said with finality then turned my attention to Lucio. “Do you know where they’re hiding?”
“No idea. We ran the plates of the vehicles caught on the security camera, but they’re fake.”
“Of course, they are.” I sighed. “You took care of that, right? The security footage?”
“I’m going to take that question as a fucking insult, cous.”
Dante got up from his seat and walked to the window. I knew he was staring at Rafe and Layla playing outside in the garden. I also knew how torn he felt. Torn between his loyalty toward our family, and the love for his own. Layla and Rafe changed his life completely. And understandably so. God knew I fell in love with my little nephew, his innocent little face fueling my need to protect what was ours. Right now, they were all in danger. I realized that when I witnessed these Russian fuckers put a bullet in the waitress’s skull.
“Brother.”
Dante turned to face me.
“I think you need to take Layla and Rafe somewhere safe until we figure this out. Until we’ve eliminated the threat.”
He shook his head. “You know I can’t leave while this shit is going down.”
“Yeah. But I also know you can’t have this kind of threat around your son. In fact,” I turned to face Lorik, “you need to take my sister somewhere safe as well. We can’t afford to risk any of them.”
Lorik scoffed. “Not a chance, my man. Your little sister is like a fucking mother hen over Doe. You should see all the clothing she bought. It’s like someone gave her a real life fucking Barbie doll. There’s no way your sister is leaving here.”
Lucio snickered. “Lorik, you need to learn how to control your woman.”
“There’s no controlling dynamite, bro.”
Lucio laughed out loud. “Oh, my God, you are such a pussy. I can’t believe one tiny woman
can fuck with your brain so much.”
“Hey,” Lorik glowered at him, “my Albanian ass is unfuckwithable…unless it’s a five foot nine, Italian, C-cup brunette who can curse at me in two different languages.”
I couldn’t help but laugh along with Lucio. Everyone in this room knew what a fireball my little sister was—especially Lorik.
“Fine,” I conceded. “But, Lorik, you need to keep my sister in line. And double the security around her.” I turned to Dante. “You, brother, need to take your family somewhere safe. Preferably today.”
He nodded. “Fine, I’ll arrange for them to leave before sundown.”
“No.” I pinned my gaze on him. “You’re going with them.”
“Not a chance, brother.”
I stood. “You leaving with your family to keep them safe won’t be seen as disloyalty, Dante. In fact, I would see it as a betrayal against your own blood if you didn’t.”
“Antonio—”
“Dante, don’t make me use my rank as boss. You’re my brother, and I’m asking you to go with them.”
In silence, my brother and I stared at each other. I could only imagine how torn he had to be feeling, and I didn’t want that. I didn’t want him to feel conflicted—especially when it came to any members of this family. And that was what Layla and Rafe were…family.
Dante let out a breath. “Okay. We’ll be gone by sundown.”
He wasn’t happy, and I didn’t blame him. Leaving while our family remained a target went against the very nature of our existence. But as the world evolved, as we evolved, changes were unavoidable.
I nodded then turned to face Lorik. “You sure you won’t be able to persuade my little sister to leave?”
The door slammed, and all of us looked up, staring right at Karina. “There’s not a chance in hell, big brother.” Without taking her eyes off me, she said, “Guys, I need a few minutes alone with my brother, please.”
“Sure thing, babe.” Lorik, the pussy-whipped fucker stood and pecked Karina on the cheek as he walked out of my office. Dante and Lucio followed, but of course Lucio smirked my way from behind Karina. I just glared at him. Fucker.