by Logan Jacobs
“Excuse me,” I said to the spice vendor. “Aren’t most of these herbs… you know, illegal?”
“Ah, ya must be from one of the other fine cities in our empire,” the dwarf chuckled. “Are you a trader?”
“I have my hands in a lot of things,” I said.
“So do I,” the spice vendor laughed. “These spices are… harder to come by in other cities, it’s true.”
“But not here?” I raised an eyebrow.
“No, not here,” the dwarf replied. “Ya see, in the Gold City, there’s only one real rule about what we can and cannot sell.”
“And what’s that?” Penny asked.
“If someone will buy it, we can sell it,” the spice vendor laughed again. “We don’t have much time for morals around here. As long as the money’s flowing, that’s all we care about.”
“Good to know,” I said. “Thanks for your time.”
“Keep me in mind if you ever find yourself in need of a little something special,” the dwarf said with a smile.
I nodded and moved on, and when we were all out of earshot, I glanced at my friends.
“You know what this means, don’t you?” I grinned. “If things that are illegal in other places are legal here, then we really might be able to get our business off the ground.”
“I mean, what’s more illegal than whiskey, right?” Penny asked. “But if all people care about in the Gold City is money and having a good time, then we can really fucking work with that-- even more than we thought, I mean.”
“Exactly,” I said. “It looks like we picked a good city to start in.”
When we arrived at the mansion, I had to remind myself not to look impressed so that I wouldn’t seem like the country hick I had grown up as. Still, it was hard not to be impressed by the mansion in front of us. Everything about the building was made of pale marble, but it didn’t look like just another elven mansion in the Capital. Instead, the marble had flecks of gold all throughout, so the whole structure glittered in the light of the torches.
Because in between every huge stone pillar on the front, there was a massive burning torch, and each torch burned a different color. I knew it had to be some kind of elven magic trick, but it was still beautiful to see the red and blue and even green flames all lined up along the front of the mansion.
I tightened my grip on Penny’s arm and started to climb the marble stairs up to the entrance. Dar and Ava stayed right behind us, so when we reached the top of the stairs, we all met the security team together. There were three of them just at the front door, but there were more guards stationed all along the perimeter of the mansion, and I guessed that there were even more inside.
“They’re all different races,” Ava murmured as we waited in line to check our weapons. “The guards, I mean.”
“Shit, you’re right,” Penny said. “There’s dwarves, halflings, even some humans… no elves, of course, but I guess that’s because they’re all at the party.”
“There’s also no orcs,” I pointed out.
“Probably because these fancy-ass people in their fancy-ass clothes would shit a brick if they saw an orc in the flesh,” Dar said.
“Fair enough,” I said. “It’s not like we’ve seen any orc outposts anywhere in the city, so it makes sense that they’re not here, either.”
The elf at the door now handed over his spear to the security team, but then the elven couple right behind him didn’t have any weapons to declare, so they went ahead inside. As soon as they were past the door, the four of us stepped forward for admission.
The halfling who seemed to be in charge looked us up and down, but he seemed satisfied by our clothes, so he didn’t ask any questions. After all, this wasn’t the kind of party that required an invitation. It was the kind where people just showed up to have a good time, and as long as they looked the part and didn’t cause any trouble, they were sent right in.
“You and your bodyguards will need to check your weapons,” the halfling said and then glanced at Ava’s heavy recurve bow. “All of them.”
“I understand,” the blonde assassin replied, but then she took a step forward and jabbed her finger in the halfling’s face. “But if anything happens to my bow while you’re taking care of it, you’ll have to answer to me, understand?”
“You let your guards speak to people like that?” the halfling demanded.
“Oh, she can speak to people any way she likes,” I said. “But that’s more than I can say for you. Watch your tone when it comes to me and mine.”
“Yes, sir,” the halfling security guard said. “You have my apologies.”
Ava handed over her bow and her long dagger, Penny handed over her two new daggers, Dar turned in his blade, and as much as I didn’t want to, I handed over my double-sided dagger and my war hammer. Normally, I would have worried that it might look strange to have a battle hammer with me, but since I had just seen someone turn in a full-length fucking spear, I didn’t worry too much about it.
Even if I did feel naked without any of my weapons.
Still, if we wanted to blend in at the party and find out everything we could, it was important to play by their rules as much as possible. So after we handed over our weapons, I gave them my name, and I watched one of the humans on the security team jot down a label and then cart the weapons away to a safe location.
“Please enjoy the party, sir!” the halfling called as we entered the party.
I knew he only wanted to keep me from saying anything to his employer, but it was important that anyone who had been listening knew that we were not to be trifled with. Here, I wasn’t a thief or even a guild leader. I was a trader, and that meant I had money as well as power.
And I would make sure people remembered that.
“You kept something on you, right?” I whispered to Ava.
“Of course, I did,” the assassin snickered. “I have a whole set of throwing knives hidden underneath my tunic. They wouldn’t have felt them even if they had searched me.”
“I would have liked to see them try to search you,” Penny laughed. “Wade looked ready to rip that halfling’s throat out when he questioned you.”
“Oh, I definitely noticed,” Ava said with a sly smile.
“So what do we do now?” Dar asked. “Who do we talk to first?”
We were still in the atrium of the mansion, but it was so full of people that we moved forward at a slow shuffle toward the main hall. I couldn’t see much past the crowd yet, but I could see the same brightly colored flames up ahead that burned outside the mansion, and I could hear the loud pulse of music from the band inside.
“That doesn’t sound very elven,” I said.
“Maybe they’re more relaxed about their music here, not just their morals,” Penny said.
“Let’s hope so,” I said. “I’d be fine if I never had to hear those damned elven pipes again.”
As soon as we passed into the main hall, I looked around to try to answer Dar’s question. I knew that anyone important in the city should be here, so there was a whole list of people that we could talk to about our whiskey, but we needed to use our time wisely.
“I tell you what,” I said, “why don’t we figure out what the fuck this party is for, and then we can figure out who to go talk to first?”
“So we can, like, break the ice and stuff, right?” Dar asked.
“Something like that,” I replied. “So at least until we figure out our plan of attack, let’s stick together.”
We moved a little deeper into the crowd of people around us, and when we almost ran into a pot-bellied elf with a whole plate of chicken thighs, I figured he looked like the kind of man who was always happy to share any tidbits of gossip.
“What’s this party for, anyway?” I called, as if I wasn’t asking anyone in particular. “Do any of you know?”
“I’m afraid not,” Penny sighed loudly.
“Oh, I can help you with the answer to that,” the pot-bellied elf said as he licke
d the greasy chicken fat from his lips.
“Really?” I turned toward him with a smile. “I didn’t realize anyone else had heard my question.”
“You’re from out of town?” the elf guessed. “Here on business?”
“That’s right,” I said. “I heard this celebration was the place to be, but no one has actually said what the fuck we’re celebrating.”
“Ohhhhh,” the elf replied and then tore into another chicken thigh until only the stringy tendons were left. “We’re celebrating some fucking big-shot elven general.”
“That’s not what I thought you were going to say,” I laughed as I glanced around the room and saw no sign of the elven military.
“Eh, even the military celebrations are different here in the Gold City,” the elf said. “But then again, everything works a little differently here.”
“So I’ve heard,” I said.
“So what did this big-shot elven general do?” Penny asked. “If he earned himself this party, he really must have done something good.”
Somehow, I doubted that the elven definition of a good deed was the same as mine was. After all, it was just as likely that the elven general had slaughtered a whole village of humans, and that was the reason for this celebration, but I kept that thought to myself.
“Oh, he just defeated a whole horde of wild orcs that had set up camp in the mountains just outside the city,” the pot-bellied elf replied.
“There are wild orcs around here?” Penny raised her eyebrows. “I didn’t know there were any left at all.”
“They like to go to the wildest places,” the elf said. “It suits their nature, you know, and the mountains outside of our walls are… well, they’re quite wild.”
“Well, I guess it’s a good thing that you have some big-shot general to take care of them for you, isn’t it?” I responded.
“You can certainly say that again,” the elf said as he smacked his lips to chew another mouthful of chicken. “Oh, oh, look! There’s the general now!”
I turned toward where the elf pointed with his greasy fingers. There were several raised platforms all around the room. One was for the band, another few were for dancers, but the last platform was filled with tables for the guest of honor.
The highest-ranking elven nobles were all there alongside the guest of honor, so I craned my neck a little more to look over the top of everyone’s heads. As my gaze ran over the last platform and landed on the night elf who stood in the middle of all the nobles, I felt a knot form in the pit of my stomach.
The night elf wore the usual military uniform and long turquoise and silver cloak. But even though his back was to me, so I couldn’t see his face at first, the sick feeling in my stomach only grew until I felt my fists clench at my sides.
Finally, the big-shot elven general turned around, and it confirmed everything I had thought.
I knew exactly who this general was.
It was motherfucking Tevian.
Chapter 3
“Oh, fuck,” I muttered, as I felt Penny stiffen beside me.
“I know, you hardly ever see the blue-skins out and about with the rest of us,” the pot-bellied elf laughed. “We day elves are usually much more fun, but I guess someone convinced the general to come out and celebrate his victory.”
“How about that?” I grunted. “Thanks for the information.”
I grabbed Penny’s arm and hurried away before the elf tried to talk to us any more. As soon as we had made it to the side of the room, I found an empty alcove that the four of us could duck into, and we stepped away from the lights and the music to regroup.
“What. The. Actual. Fuck,” Penny groaned. “How is this even possible?”
“Fucking Tevian,” Dar said. “Of course that bastard decides to show his face here.”
“To be fair, I don’t think he knows we’re here,” Ava pointed out.
“But, like… how is he here?” Penny repeated. “Wasn’t he supposed to just leave the city in disgrace and go retire somewhere quiet in the country? What’s he doing here?”
“Fighting wild orcs, apparently,” I said. “But is anyone really surprised?”
“What do you mean?” Dar asked.
“That asshole is way too ambitious and self-important to just retire in the countryside,” I said. “This is fucking Tevian we’re talking about, after all.”
“You mean the biggest asshole to ever have an asshole?” Dar snickered.
“Exactly,” I laughed. “We should have known that he wouldn’t just go off quietly somewhere. Of course, he still has to have his hand in things.”
“You mean, of course he still has to do things that will earn him praise and recognition from the higher-ups,” Penny said. “He’s probably still trying to kiss Clodia’s ass with all this wild orc business.”
“As if the guildmaster cares what one general in the empire does,” I said. “But you’re probably right. He might even by trying to position himself to get his old job back.”
“Or a better one,” Ava said. “If he’s this ambitious, he probably has his sights set on something much higher than just being the captain of the guard in our city.”
“Like what?” the redheaded pixie asked.
“I don’t know,” the blonde assassin replied, “but whatever it is, he must think that he can get it here.”
“He’s probably trying to get a higher promotion in the army,” Dar said. “I hear the pay for top military leaders is almost as much as the temple priestesses get, and that’s nothing to fucking sniff at.”
“What the hell is higher-ranking than a general?” Penny demanded.
“A city commander,” Ava said. “Like Commander Vardreth.”
“Maybe he wants Vardreth’s job,” I said. “Or he wants that job, but in a different city. Maybe even this one.”
“Well, it looks like he’s doing a pretty damn good job of it so far,” Dar sighed. “Look at him over there. It’s like he never had to leave our city in disgrace at all.”
I glanced back at the platform and saw that Dar was right. While I wouldn’t say that Tevian exactly looked like he was enjoying himself, that was probably only because the stick up his ass made it damn near impossible for him to enjoy anything.
But as much as it was possible for Tevian to enjoy something, it looked like the general was having himself quite a nice time up on the platform with all the other most important elves in the city. He looked goddamn smug about it, too, and I wanted to punch the smile right off of his arrogant face.
“He’s a cockroach,” Ava said with a shrug. “He’ll always land on his feet.”
“At least until we squash him underneath our boots,” Penny growled and bristled like she would launch herself through the crowd and tackle him like a wild tiger.
“Easy, there,” I said and laid a hand on Penny’s arm. “As much as I appreciate your enthusiasm, let’s not do anything hasty.”
“So what’s our play now?” Dar asked. “I don’t know about you all, but I’d rather avoid Tevian if it’s at all possible. So I mean, now that we know he’s here, should we just try another city?”
“Fuck, no,” I swore. “I’ll be damned if I let Tevian keep me from expanding into this gold mine of a city.”
“We are already set up here,” Penny agreed. “We’ve got a warehouse filled with you-know-what and everything, so it would be kind of a waste to just leave it all behind, and it will take us another two weeks to get it out.”
“Exactly,” I said, “and we’ve done all of our research on this city. We know the layout, some of the players, a list of potential clients, and all of that good shit.”
“So what, we just tell Tevian to go fuck himself because we claimed this city first?” Dar snickered.
“Technically, I think we probably claimed this city after he did,” Ava said with a smirk.
“Oh, fuck the technicalities,” I said. “This city’s fucking ours.”
“But--” Dar started again.
“I know,” I cut him off. “But the thing is, he doesn’t necessarily ever have to know that we’re here, right?”
“Well, I guess now that we know he’s in the Gold City, it should be easier to avoid him,” Dar said. “So it’s possible that we could conduct our business while he’s still here, and he would never even know.”
“Or I could just kill him,” Ava said as she leaned back against the wall.
I had a brief vision of an assassination mission gone wrong, and for just a second, I could see Ava sprawled out lifeless across the ground with our child still inside her. Immediately, I shook my head to bring myself back to the present, but it was hard to shake the feeling that my heart had almost jumped up into my throat.
“No,” I said. “As much as I’d like him out of the picture, you can’t kill him.”
“Why not?” Dar folded his arms over his chest. “You have to admit, it would make things easier.”
“Only in some ways,” I said. “But it would just be a temporary fix, and I think it would create more problems than it would solve.”
“Is that all?” Ava raised an eyebrow, but then she gave me a little smile. “Is that the only reason?”
“More or less,” I said with a wink.
“Okay, I don’t know what’s happening here with all your winks and smiles,” Penny said, “but as fun as it is to see you two flirt, could we maybe get back to the matter at hand?”
“You mean what to do about Skeevy-an Tevian?” Ava smiled.
“Oh, you remembered my nickname for him,” the redheaded pixie said and clapped her hands together. “I’m touched, really.”
“I know you could just kill him, Ava,” I said. “I don’t for a second doubt that you could. If you wanted to, I’m sure you could kill him in the middle of this crowd, and no one would even see you.”
“That’s very true, thank you,” the blonde assassin said with a nod.
“But that would raise a hell of a lot of red flags here,” I explained, “and since we’re only just getting started in the Gold City, I don’t think we should rock the boat just yet.”