Telling the kids about their parents was heart-breaking. I'm so glad Mrs. MacThomas was there to help. Tessa was great, too, I have to admit. The kids love her and seem to gravitate to wherever she is. Tessa and I discussed it and decided to take the nanny’s advice and stay together with the twins at Mermaid Cottage. It makes sense that the kids feel most comfortable here.
Yesterday morning I did the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I said a final goodbye to my twin. Mary and Roman had left detailed instructions in their will that they wanted to be cremated and have their ashes spread in the firth near the cottage. The day dawned heartbreakingly beautiful. Tessa and I scattered the ashes of our siblings alone, before the children were up. We both agreed it would be too distressing for the kids to try to understand that the particles of dust were what’s left of their parents’ bodies.
Tessa is infuriatingly stubborn, but we've managed to call a truce to our arguing for now, especially in front of the kids. I even find myself having fun when I'm around her, which is a big surprise to us both, I think. But I can’t let my guard down. She's after one thing, and that's the kids. Dad's right, as usual. I can't let myself be caught up in her sweet smile or drown in her deep brown eyes. I have to remember that when we get to New York, she's the enemy. Well, enemy is too strong a word. She's my opponent. Yes, that's better. I do wish, though, that she’d just give in and agree to move to New York City. Fat chance of that. She doesn’t just give in about anything.
For instance, Mrs. MacThomas reminded us that after the Remembrance Ceremony for Mary and Roman we’ll be wanting to head back to America. I immediately offered the use of my jet. I mean, it’s how I’m getting back, so the rest of them might as well come aboard, as well. But no. Little Miss Can’t Take Anything She Didn’t Earn Herself was having none of it. I think we argued for at least a half hour straight. Finally, the nanny stepped in, shaking her finger in each of our faces, telling us that we need to stop acting like children to give the real children an example to aim for. It was embarrassing to be scolded like a child, but she’s right. Thankfully, Tessa agreed, and gave in. We’ll fly back to New York tomorrow morning.
The past week has been so emotionally heavy for us all, that I want today to be a fun, relaxing day. A plan’s been slowly forming about how to spend the day. I woke up early, as I usually do, and I'm standing on the deck, looking out at the sun rising over the firth. It's so calm and just plain perfect. I feel a sense of peace that I've never felt before. Then I see the dolphins.
"Hey, guys, get out here. There's a pod of dolphins, hurry!" I have no idea if anyone is awake, or even if they’ll hear me, but I can’t see such a magical site and not say anything.
In seconds I feel two little hands on my shirt, tugging to be picked up for a better view. Laughing, I reach down and pick up Abbie first, then Archie, and hold on to them tight as they sit on the edge of the deck railing. I notice they're both still in their pj's. Abbie's are covered in mermaids and Archie's are cartoon pirates.
"Wow, aren't they just awesome? Oh, look, kids, did you see how high that one jumped?" Tessa joins us and her laugh is like music. I can't stop the thought that I want to hear more of it.
I catch her eye and smile. The smile she gives me back causes my dick to wake up. Her long black hair is like silk, blowing in the gentle breeze coming off the water. I want to bury myself in it, and in her warm neck that’s peeking out of the top of the oversized t-shirt she must sleep in. I can't help it. I have to look down at her long creamy brown legs, completely bare down to her toes. As infuriating as she is, she’s also gorgeous.
"The dolphins are out there, big fella." For once, there's no irritation or anger in her voice when she speaks to me. I could get used to that.
"I like my view just fine, thanks." She laughs that beautiful laugh again. I did that. I feel a sense of accomplishment that makes me smile back. The kids squeal with excitement as the dolphins continue their playful swim around the bay.
"Look at that one, Aunt Tessa! I'm going to call her Twirly because she keeps twirling in the air, do you see her?"
In this moment, life feels right. I really could get used to this.
Whoa, I can’t let my dick do my thinking. I won’t let anything get in the way of doing my duty. This chick wants to take away these kids. I keep thinking like this and before I know it, I'll be alone again in New York.
"Hey, kids, lets run down to the beach and get a closer look." Those big brown eyes are focused on me again. "You coming, Bram?"
I push my father's caution out of my head. There's plenty of time to be the bad guy when we're back in New York. Right now, I'm going to enjoy running on the beach with my niece and nephew while we watch dolphins play. Surely not even Gordon Carter would begrudge me that.
Today was a good day. When Tessa just goes with the flow it makes my life so much easier. If she'd be this way all the time, I don't think we'd have any problem sharing custody of the kids in New York. I have to get her to agree to move. I just need to figure out how I’m going to do that.
After the dolphins decided to go play somewhere else, the four of us went inside where Mrs. MacThomas had a delicious breakfast set out. I usually don't eat much in the morning, mostly just coffee and whatever my assistant Andrew has brought in from the local bakery. Today, though, I ate like a mongrel starving on the street. I was happy to see the kids with more of an appetite than I'd seen from them lately, too.
I spent some time on the phone midmorning, tying up loose ends with MacTavish and making sure the plane’s ready for our flight in the morning. I could hear the kids and Tessa running around in the back yard playing a game that reminded me of my own childhood. The sound of laughter pulled me outside even against my dad's voice in my head warning me to keep my distance from Tessa.
The nanny comes outside around noon with a backpack full of food and water, and a map of a local walking trail. Even though I’d planned this with the nanny, I pretend to consider staying home. It’s kind of nice to have the kids begging me to go, and I’m happy to see that even Tessa looks like she won't be mad if I go, so I make a big show of giving in.
The walk is a resounding success. Tessa takes the lead with the kids following, and I bring up the rear. We stop at some picnic tables by a lake and eat our sandwiches. It’s a beautiful day and the kids are running around and laughing. I can't help but think that it would be nice to have more days like this. If only Tessa would move to New York, we could spend weekends exploring the city, going to parks and museums, taking the kids to musicals and plays. The list is endless.
Refocusing on the here and now, I push all thoughts of New York out of my head and resolve to make the most of today.
After we get back, the kids take a nap and Tess and I spend some time walking on the beach. She surprises me when she thanks me for planning such a wonderful day.
“You knew? I thought I was being so smooth.”
“Oh, you’re smooth, all right, but yeah, I knew. I heard you talking to Mrs. MacThomas in the kitchen. It really was lovely. It’s going to be hard going back to Oklahoma City tomorrow. Back to reality with a thud, for sure.”
Shit. Surely, she doesn’t think we’re going to Oklahoma tomorrow. Obviously, she does. “Um, Tessa, about tomorrow… I have to go straight back to New York. I’ve been away from my business too long as it is. I thought you understood that.” She stops walking and turns to face me, both hands on her hips, hair whipping wildly with the breeze.
“I knew it was too good to be true. You just can’t help being an ass. When were you going to tell me that you’re not taking me home? Or was your plan just to kidnap me and the twins and force us to stay in New York?”
“Seriously? Do you really think I’d kidnap you? For fuck’s sake, Tessa, give me a break. Of course I need to go back to New York first. I mean, even if you flew commercial, you’d probably stop there first, right? I just need a few days to check in and do a few things, and then I’ll take you home. Give me a little
credit, would you?” To be honest, I hadn’t given taking her to Oklahoma a thought once she’d agreed to fly home with me. In hindsight, yeah, I should’ve. Now, I’ve got to figure out a way to stall until I can either talk her into moving or get custody of the kids. Neither will be quick or easy.
“Don’t be ridiculous. There’s no need for you to fly me back, I’m perfectly capable of catching a plane back all by myself. Well, with the children, of course.” With that last statement, she sticks her chin out in defiance, daring me to contradict her. I decide to save this fight for another day.
“Come on, Tessa, let’s not fight anymore. It’s been a near perfect day, and I’d like to keep it that way, how about you?” I can see her inner struggle. Clearly, fighting with me wouldn’t screw up the day for her, but I guess I must look pitiful enough that she has mercy on me.
“Fine. But don’t think I’ll just let you take over because I won’t. But we don’t have to talk about it now.”
“Good, because I’m starving. Let’s head back to the house and I’ll fire up the grill.”
I cook steaks and baked potatoes to go along with the vegetables Mrs. MacThomas whips up in the kitchen. The kids run around so much on the beach they exhaust themselves again and go to bed soon after the meal. Mrs. MacThomas excuses herself to go read in her room, as she does most nights. It's getting dark now, but the moon is full and bright. The breeze off the water is a little cool, so I turn on the outside heating lamps Roman and Mary had placed in strategic spots on the deck. This place is really awesome. I love it here.
My thoughts surprise me because I've always been a city boy. New York City, born and bred. The fact that I made my way in a city that chews people up and spits them back out has always been a source of pride. But there's just something magical about Scotland.
"You're deep in thought. Everything okay?"
I'm startled to see Tessa standing at my elbow. "Wow, you've kept your ninja skills a secret. I didn't even hear you come outside."
Tessa shivers a little. She's still wearing the short-sleeved top and hiking shorts she wore on our walk earlier. The white of her top glows in the moonlight and contrasts with her darker coloring. She's easily one of the most natural beauties I've ever seen. Right now, I want nothing more than to put my arms around her small, curvy body and warm her up from the inside out. Instead, I just ask if she got the kids to sleep okay.
"Yeah, bless their little hearts. They were exhausted after all the physical exercise today. It's good for them, though. I told them a story about a time when my brother and I were little. We got lost in the woods. We were about the same age as Abbie and Archie, no more than six I know, because we were still living with our parents on the farm. Anyway, it felt like we wandered around out there in the woods for days, but in reality, it was just a few hours. I was determined we'd find our way home, but Roman was determined to have an adventure instead. I thought I'd be smart and leave sticks stuck up in the ground, so we'd know if we were walking in circles. Mom had taught us that. I didn't know it until later, but Roman was coming along behind me and pulling the sticks up."
"How'd you get home?" I'm not just asking to be polite. I really want to know how they made it out. That surprises me.
"Oh, we walked around for ages until I got so tired, I gave in to Roman. He wanted to try to build a hut to live in until we were rescued. Eventually Dad found us. He acted impressed with the sad little pile of wood we'd thrown together and called a hut. The cool thing was that the next day, he took us back to that spot in the woods and let us help him build us a real treehouse. It's one of my favorite memories of my dad."
"I bet the kids loved that story."
"Yeah, they did. We have to keep telling them things like that about their parents, Bram. We have to keep them alive in their memories. They're so young, just like Roman and I were. I know how easy it is to forget the little things."
She looks so vulnerable, standing there in the moonlight with that sad look on her face. Before I give myself, or my dad's voice, a chance to talk me out of it, I lean down and kiss her softly. So softly that my lips just barely touch hers before I pull away. I half expect her to take a swing at me, but she doesn't. I feel her hands on my arms and she tilts her face up towards mine. Leaning down again, I gently take her lips, tasting them with my tongue. Her arms slide up around my neck and without thinking I reach down and lift her so that her adorable little ass is sitting on the deck railing. She's no heavier than the children were this morning.
Our kiss deepens as she kisses me back, holding me close. I can feel her hands in my hair, on my face, my back, my chest. She's exploring my body, so I explore hers back. She's so small, which kind of shocks me. The force of her will is so strong that in my mind she's larger than life. She's small in stature, but she's got plenty of curves and I seek them out, feeling the firm roundness of her butt cheeks, the swell of her breast in my hand, the soft skin of her leg and firm muscle of her calf. I press in closer to her, pulling her to my body, so close that I can feel the warmth of her through my jeans. I'm rock hard. Her legs close around me as her mouth moves to my neck and leaves a trail of warm kisses. I don't want to break the spell, but I have to ask.
"Are you sure, Tessa?" I hold her face between my palms and try to look in her eyes, but her face is in a shadow.
A second later the moment is shattered. A scream comes from inside the house.
Tessa pushes me out of the way and is inside before I can even process what I just heard. The second scream spurs me into action and I'm just seconds behind Tessa when she opens the door to the children's room.
10
Tessa
The twins' screams terrify me. I push Bram aside and jump down from the porch railing. Even as I run inside the house, I can feel my cheeks heat up with the shame of what I had been about to do. I'm no prude, far from it, but I was about to let that full of himself asshat screw me right there on the deck. Then he’d think he’d won. His type always sees a woman having sex with them as surrender. Well, I'm not surrendering. I’m also not staying in New York.
In their room, both the kids are sitting up in the same bed, even though they each have their own. Archie’s crying and Abbie’s hugging him and rocking slowly back and forth. The sight brings me to tears. They're both so little. Too little to have to deal with all this.
"You okay, Archie? Abbie?" I sit down next to them and gather them up as close to my body as I can, arms fully around them. Poor little Archie is shaking, and now that she doesn't have to be the strong one, Abbie starts to cry, too. I just hold them, rocking instinctively, and let them cry it out. I realize I’m crying, too, but I don’t care.
Bram comes into the room quietly and sits on the opposite bed. From over the twins' heads, I look at him through my tears. He's crying, too. This completely surprises me. He strikes me as the kind of guy who thinks crying shows weakness. But there he is, sitting there, crying quietly right along with us. My heart softens toward him. But just a little. Of course, he's grieving, too. He's lost his sibling, just like I have.
"Here ye go, my loves. A bit of warm milk for ye. There, there, now, drink up and Auntie Tessa and Uncle Bram will tuck yer back in. That's braw, lovies."
The kids drink their warm milk and allow us to get them back into bed. As before, though, they sleep in the one bed for comfort. Looking down at their sweet little faces, long black eyelashes on their tear-stained cheeks, I feel a tug at my heart. I promise you, my little sweethearts, that I will always be here for you.
"Goodnight, Abbie. Goodnight, Archie. I love you both so much."
"I love you, too, Abs and Arch. Goodnight."
Bram and I quietly leave the room. Standing in the dimly lit hallway, I feel the heat from his body. My cheeks feel flushed again as I remember the feel of my legs wrapped around him. I remember feeling the hardness of him between my legs, pressed against me. I confess I desperately want to have sex with this man. What I don't want is the entanglement. It would complicate
things too much and make it harder to fight him for the children. So, instead of a night of what I suspect would be amazing sex, I simply say goodnight and go to my room. Once there, I do my best to push all thoughts of Bram and his sexy body out of my head. It’s not easy, so I try to concentrate on the logistics of flying back home tomorrow.
I still can't quite believe that Mrs. MacThomas is coming with us, but I'm not upset about it. The children love her, and she clearly adores them. She told me that she’s a widow, with a grown son who’s married with two children of his own, but they live in Australia. She said that the Stephensons quickly became like her second family. No wonder Mary trusted her so much.
My thoughts can’t stay away from Bram for long. I try to focus on the negatives, so I don’t embarrass myself by slipping into his room in the middle of the night. I hate that I have to give in to His Royal Jackass and fly back on his private jet. Good grief, the man owns his own jet. No wonder he thinks everyone will just bend to his will. He doesn't live in the same world as the rest of us. On the other hand, tomorrow I'll be flying back to the US on a private jet. No long lines at the airport or sitting next to someone determined to sleep on my shoulder. Oh, yes, and no chair in front of me leaned so far back I could do dental work on them.
One minute I’m irritated with him, the next minute I’m desperate for his kiss. Sleep is impossible.
Because of Them: Heartfelt Romance Page 6