by Milo Abrams
be okay, so then where is he?”
Will didn’t have an answer to that.
“Ruby, listen. It can’t be good all the time.”
“Exactly! I never got to have children no matter how badly I wanted to. Those goats were all I had, and now one of them is missing and you don’t give a shit!”
Will began to soften. “I do too care.”
“How?”
“Are you kidding? Why do you think I bought all those materials? Why do you think I spent all that time searching for him? What do you think is the point of me trying to reassure you and calm you down all the time? It’s because I love you! I love you and care about you!”
Ruby fell silent.
In the twenty years that they had been married, they had shared quite a few fights. Some were bigger than others. But when Ruby’s shadow came out it always ended the same. They would yell and scream, say some things they didn’t mean or maybe get dangerously close to doing something that they would later regret. But after the dark entity that seemed to take her over spread to Will and they fought it out, it subsided. It went somewhere deep and dark to hide until the next time it needed all their negative energy to feed off of. As much as it was something that they needed to work on, it was a completely common part of human nature.
“You know I love you too,” she said softly.
“I know you do,” he said, lightly touching her elbow. “You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t. You wouldn’t have put up with my crazy idea to start a farm on our own, or deal with my nonsense this long.”
She smiled. It was the first time that she had smiled in what seemed like forever. It finally felt that they were getting somewhere. In the last few days of turmoil and uproar, Will felt that they finally had a breakthrough of their own. He hoped that finally the anxiety was starting to die down, and he would have his Ruby once again.
“I don’t want to see Dr. Benson anymore,” she said suddenly.
“What? But you’ve been seeing her for so many years.”
She pushed the hair from her eyes. “And don’t you think that if she was helping then things would be different? I’m having the nightmare every night still. So, I give up. I don’t want to see her anymore. We will work these things out on our own.”
Will smiled painfully. He wasn’t exactly sure that Dr. Benson had helped Ruby much, but he knew that she didn’t hurt any. She was way more qualified than he was to deal with that sort of thing. But no one knew her like he did, and so based on that reason alone, he would try.
“Do you want to see what I did to the goat pen?” he finally asked.
She smiled and nodded. “Okay. Then I’ll make us some dinner.”
They walked outside together holding hands. The sun was starting to set, bleeding across the sky in a deep vermilion. When they reached the barn, the goats still seemed confused at the addition to their surroundings.
“Wow,” she said. “You really added a lot to this.”
Will nodded. “I plan to do more. No animals are getting in here. I’m going to keep your goats safe and everything will be okay.”
Ruby smiled, not knowing that he was only half right.
9
Sleep. All she wanted to do was sleep. Night after night the nightmare returned and kept her from getting any substantial rest. All the while Will slept next to her, oblivious to everything that happened during the night. Sometimes she would be up for hours, before and after the nightmare, fearing its arrival or lying anxiously frozen in its aftermath. For someone who was already afraid of the dark, it was hell.
She crawled in next to Will, the fear of having the nightmare sitting in the deep recess at the back of her mind. He smiled at her and then leaned in and gave her a kiss. The fight they had earlier was needed. They both had some steam to let go, and now that they were both a little more emotionally freed up, they felt closer. It had been a terrible day, but despite the loss of her beloved goat, Ruby felt happier than she had in a while. The cold distance that was growing between her and her husband stopped expanding. It was good. To her, he was home and all she had ever had.
Will rolled over with a smile on his face, and fell right to sleep. It was what usually happened every night, and Ruby slipped into the comfort of the routine. She hoped that her newest routine of plunging head-first into her recurring nightmare was a thing of the past.
She cuddled her pillow and stared at the night light as it glowed, listening to the steady deepening breaths of her husband behind her.
Everything will be okay. I don't need Dr. Benson or anyone else, except Will.
She traced the glow as it curved along the walls of her room, clearly marking the space between the light and dark. At her feet, the bedroom door was securely closed, as it was every night. Everything was calm and serene. There was no better time for her to surrender to the sleep she so desperately needed. As she closed her eyes, she thought she saw a shadow move in the corner. It was too late. Her body had already received the signal from her brain and the process of falling to sleep had begun. She rode the steady decline of awareness into the dark, dismissing the moving shadow.
Just my eyes playing tricks.
Time disappeared. Space evaporated. Ruby’s mind opened like the wide mouth of a whale, bringing her awareness unknowingly into a dream.
In front of her the scene played out like a movie. She found herself walking down a long hallway with doors on both sides. The walls were gray and the doors were all windowless slabs that passed her endlessly while she walked. She felt the urge to stop and try to open one but it was locked. Then she tried another. And another. Every one she tried was locked and they stretched forever in both directions. She panicked.
“Hello?” she called out down the empty hallway. “Can anyone hear me?”
She tried pounding on one of the doors but it was solid and offered no reverberation from her strikes. She moved down to another door and tried pulling on the handle but it was also locked. Suddenly a loud clicking noise came from further down the hall, causing her to turn and try and discern its direction. She moved slowly toward where the noise came from, eyeing each door with her head tilted forward like a bloodhound. Closely examining each identical door, she finally came to a door to her left that was cracked open. Around the edges, the opening was filled with bright white light. She placed her hand on the door and pushed it open, allowing the intense light to flow out and engulf her. Without thinking, she stepped inside.
The room was nothing but white light. In the center, some distance away, were five black figures standing together. Words escaped her as curiosity took over her movements, making her arms and legs lift and propel her forward. The five figures were blacker than anything she had ever seen, but there was no exact place where they ended and the light began. The edges of their bodies seemed blurry, like they were shadows in a brightly lit room. As she got closer she could see that they were much smaller than she was, and when she finally reached them, they turned and looked at her. Their faces were nonexistent. Slowly they walked around her, surrounding her on all sides, before starting to move closer.
She panicked.
“No,” she uttered, unable to think of anything else to say.
We won’t hurt you, one said in a soft voiceless voice. There were no mouths to move, it was as if the voice went straight into her mind.
“Get away from me!” she screamed.
They moved closer and closer to her until the air filled with another loud clicking noise. The white light of the room intensified and swallowed everything.
Ruby sat up quickly in bed. Her heart was beating against her rib cage and her breathing labored. She looked up and saw a figure standing in the door way, a pure shadow in the light from the hall.
“Are you okay?” Will asked her.
She looked to her right and saw that his spot in the bed was empty. He slowly moved away from the door and joined her in the bed.
“I’m sor
ry if I woke you,” he said gently rubbing her cheek, “I just had to pee.”
She rubbed her eyes and forced a smile. “It’s okay, I was just dreaming.”
“Was it the nightmare again?”
She shook her head. “Thank God.”
Will was relieved. He kissed her on the cheek and slid back down under the covers. “Get some sleep,” he said.
“You too,” she replied and then laid back down.
She was relieved that it wasn’t the nightmare. Slowly, her heart rate came down and she softened into the pillow once more. The dream she was just inhabiting slipped away into the night. As her eyes slowly closed, her consciousness drifted again straight into another dream.
She was in a room with her mother. The room was small, only the size of a small bedroom, but it looked like it was being used as a living room. In the corner the TV was playing. Doctor’s in an ER were rushing a patient into the operating room surrounded by bright lights and unfamiliar faces.
Something suddenly made Ruby turn around. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and she looked so young. Her hair was still naturally brown and the creases in her aging skin had yet to set in. She looked like she was twenty years younger.
The door suddenly opened. In the hallway she could see a shadowy figure standing there. It was tall, nearly reaching the height of the doorway. A complete silhouette. It stood there watching her without moving, causing her skin to shiver and sweat. She could feel the eyeless shadow staring right into her.
“Close the door,” her mother spoke without taking her eyes off the TV.
Ruby turned toward her mother. “Close the door?”
“Close the door,” she repeated.
Ruby turned back toward the door with the shadowy figure still standing outside.
“Close the door,” she said terrified, “close the door!”
Suddenly the door slammed shut and Ruby sprung awake.
She jumped enough to make Will jump, but he didn’t wake up. He just rolled over away from her and continued snoring. Several beads of sweat dripped from her hairline as her chest heaved. Her heart was beating so hard.
It was just a dream, she thought, trying to calm herself down. Just lie down and go back to sleep. Just sleep. No more dreams.
Laying her head back down, she closed her eyes again but felt uneasy. The tingling sensation of the nerve endings in her hair follicles coming alive and the uncomfortable feeling of being watched crawled under her skin. She tried to shake it off and took a deep breath. Behind her eyelids, her eyes stared straight in front of her as her terrified mind manufactured thoughts of someone in the dark staring at her.
Just go to sleep, she told herself. Go to sleep.
The minutes felt like hours, but she couldn’t sleep.
How long have I been lying here? Surely, it’s been awhile.
Her mind drifted in and out of the uncomfortable feeling that was picking at her flesh.
I’ve probably fallen asleep and woken up several times. It’s probably been hours.
Convincing herself that it was okay, she allowed herself to slowly open her eyes. The moon cast a silvery glow in her room that paled the night light. She looked around carefully, examining the dark for anything unusual. The dressers stood against the wall as they always had, the pictures she had artfully hung on the wall were still in their places, and Will was still next to her in bed. She reached behind her to touch him and make sure. She exhaled in relief as soon as she felt his hot sleeping body.
She exhaled deeply again. What’re you getting so worked up over?
That’s when she finally noticed something out of place. The light from a night light in the hallway could not only be seen from under the door to her bedroom, but also around the edges as it barely came through. The door was open.
Her heart rate instantly increased. Will always closed the door. Always. He knew how she feared the dark, and even with the night lights, he closed the door to help her feel secure. She always felt uncomfortable, as if there might be something in the dark looking back at her.
She sat completely up, the words from her dream ringing through her head.
Close the door.
As soon as she had the thought, something moved out of the corner of her eye. She turned and saw something dark, a shadow, move quickly in front of her. She froze, her body paralyzed in fear but her hands continued to shake violently.
The thoughts streamed through her head at a million miles per hour.
Is this a dream? Am I dreaming?
She watched as a shadowy figure moved around slowly in front of her across the room toward the door.
It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream. I have to wake up. Will!
Her arm reached back behind her again and felt her husband. Everything felt so real.
“Will,” she said softly at first as she tried to shake him. The shadowy figure stopped, disappearing in the dark. She squinted hard, trying to see if it was still there. “Will?”
Then it moved again in front of the door, a tall and lanky shadow blocking the light.
“WILL!” she screamed.
This time it woke Will up. As she screamed his name, the shadowy figure flung the door open and then disappeared into the hallway making the door bounce off the wall and back into place, closing completely with a slam.
“WILL!” she screamed again.
He jumped up in a panic, grabbing the blankets and his wife at the same time.
“Huh, what? What’s wrong?!?”
“Someone was in here!” she screamed hysterically. “Someone was in here!”
Still barely awake, Will scrambled to the side of the bed and fell to the floor. He picked himself up and started to head for the door.
“No, don’t! It went out there, Will DON’T!”
He turned around and looked at her in the dark, utterly confused. He reached along the wall next to the door, finally finding the light switch and flipped it up. The room lit up like a flash bomb. They both covered their stinging eyes and took a moment to allow them to adjust. After they did, Will slowly walked to the bed and sat down next to his wife.
“Was it the nightmare again?” he asked.
“What? No. I wasn’t dreaming. Someone was in our room.”
He saw the pure terror in her eyes and felt so bad for her. “Are you sure?” he asked. “I know that dreams can seem very real, even nightmares.”
“Will!” she yelled out. “I wasn’t dreaming. I wasn’t having the nightmare. I was awake and someone was in our room. I saw it go for the door and as soon as I tried to wake you up it ran out!”
He looked into his wife’s eyes, unable to find any lack of honesty. If she believed it then it was either real, or she was delusional. Will decided to give his wife the benefit of the doubt.
“Okay,” he said. “I’ll take a look around real quick, okay?”
She nodded. Unlike her, Will wasn’t afraid of the dark. However, the idea of him walking out into it alone, with an unknown intruder in the house, left her too afraid to stay in the room alone.
“I’m coming with you,” she said. She jumped out of bed and wrapped a robe around herself.
Will slowly got up and slipped his feet into a pair of slippers, then waved for his wife to follow him to the door. She hesitated but then followed him. They opened the door and Will stepped into the hallway. It was still dark, with only a little bit of light coming from a night light halfway down, directly across from the stairs. He stared down it for a second before flipping on the light, dispersing all the shadows and returning the hallway to how it had always been. Ruby looked out and saw that the coast was clear.
“I’ll check the rooms and then we’ll head downstairs.”
She nodded and watched as he walked away toward the first of the empty bedrooms and then disappeared inside. Standing there helpless, she clutched the wooden door frame with such intensity that her fingernails left small groves in th
e wood. After a few seconds, Will reappeared in the hallway and gave her a thumbs up. He then moved to the next room. After checking out every bedroom and the bathroom, he waved for her to come over to him by the stairs.
“It’s all clear,” he said, “let’s look downstairs real quick.”
She shivered as she followed him down the stairs and watched him check the living room, the kitchen, and the rest of the lower level. Everything seemed normal. He grabbed a flashlight from the top of the fridge and went to the front door and grabbed the handle.
“Hmm, that’s odd,” he said.
“What? What’s wrong?” her anxiety shot up to a thousand.
“The door isn’t locked. I must’ve forgotten to lock it.”
Ruby panicked. “See, I told you someone was in here.”
Will look around and then said, “If someone was in here, then how come nothing is missing? I probably just forgot to lock it.”
He turned the flashlight on and opened the door. Stepping out onto the porch, the night air was filled with the buzzing of insects and the soft whooshing of the wind blowing through the trees. He shone the flashlight around the porch and onto the walkway looking for footprints. Ruby stood in the door and watched as he pointed it around everywhere and saw nothing. He returned to her and yawned.
“Looks like the coast is clear,” he said. “Can we go back to bed now?”
It felt too real. Against her intuition, she nodded and walked back inside. Will followed her but as soon as he got inside she turned quickly and scolded him.
“Close the door,” she said sternly, “and lock it.”
To continue the story, get Part Two, or read the complete story in the Origins Omnibus.
For more information on these and future works visit
www.miloabrams.com
or follow Milo on Twitter: @MiloAbrams