In a few weeks, we could be totally honest. Derek could be honest about his relationship with Ursula, and I could be honest with him about my voice. Once the production was over, I could tell him, and it wouldn’t really matter. The world wouldn’t know, but at least we could be truthful.
In fact, I was wondering if I should tell him early. It would help explain why Ursula was so hateful toward me. Plus, I just wanted him to know. But I’d made a promise to Ursula and it felt dishonest to go back on it. I was an honest person. I kept my promises. Then again, she wasn’t exactly honoring her side of the agreement. I was torn about it. Maybe by the time Derek got home, I’d have come up with a plan.
The pool was in the back courtyard, surrounded by tall walls and palm trees. Perfectly private. I slipped into the water, leaving my phone and the bathrobe next to the edge.
I’d always loved the water. Although dancing was always my extracurricular growing up, swim team would have been my backup. I was a water baby. I was just about to dive under the water and see if I could still do a flip when my phone rang. I paddled back over to the steps and answered.
“Ariel, what have you done?” my dad’s voice asked incredulously through the phone. “What were you thinking?”
I froze. How could he possibly know that I was sleeping with Derek? I looked around the high walls, half expecting to see him on a cherry picker or something. Then I remembered that it was impossible for him to know about that. He must be referring to something else I’d done that he disapproved of.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said carefully. “But good morning to you too.”
“Ariel, you should never have signed anything without sending it to me first,” my dad said, sounding irritated.
I took a deep breath. Crap. He knew about the contract I’d signed for ‘She Done Him Wrong.’ “Sebastian told you?”
My dad made a harrumph noise. “No. He should have, but he didn’t. It actually came up on a conflict of interest disclosure form. Our firm handles all the contracts for the agent that represents Ursula Jones. When you signed the contract, it appeared on my disclosures. You can imagine how surprised I was to see your name pop up.”
“Oh,” I stuttered.
“Oh?” my dad replied sarcastically. “That’s all you’ve got to say? Oh?”
I frowned. That was awfully unlucky. “Well, now you know, I guess.”
“Why wouldn’t you run this by me first?”
“Well, you couldn’t review it, could you? It would have been a conflict of interest for you.”
He laughed bitterly. “Do you think I would rather represent Ursula Jones’ agent than my own daughter?”
I bit my lip. “Yeah, I do. You’ve made no secret of the fact that you think I’m talentless.”
There was a long pause on the other side of the line. “Ariel, I think you’re very talented. I’ve always thought that. Just because I don’t want you mixed up in Hollywood doesn’t mean I want to see you get screwed over.”
“I’m not getting screwed over,” I told my dad. “I know what I’m doing.”
“Ariel, do you realize what you signed? You’re going to get no credit for your work.”
“I know that.”
“She’s going to claim your voice as her own!”
A little twinge in my heart reminded me that as much as my dad and I butted heads, he really did care about me. He didn’t like the idea of anyone claiming my talent as their own, even though he thought I should just give up. Even this small reminder that my dad cared about me was enough to make me feel slightly teary.
“I know that too,” I told him. “Dad, I can read a contract. I may not have gone to law school, but I know what I’m doing. This is my chance to break into Hollywood.”
“Do you really think that? Do you realize that you committed to never singing in a movie unless credited to Ursula?”
I shook my head. “Only for this film.”
“Ariel, I’m a lawyer. Maybe listen to me on this? You signed a contract that’s perpetual. It applies to any and all movies you ever appear in. You’ve signed your voice over to Ursula Jones permanently. You can never get another film role that requires you to sing.”
I swallowed hard. “No. That can’t be right.”
“I’m afraid it is,” my dad replied. “Listen, Ariel, this is what I was trying to tell you. Hollywood is cutthroat. It’s a bad place for someone as trusting as you are. If you would just go to law school—”
“I’m not going to law school,” I yelled. “I’ll figure this out myself! Clearly you don’t want to help me, but I’m never going to be a lawyer and I don’t need you pushing me anymore!”
I was losing my temper because I was scared that he was right. Had I just destroyed my career before it ever started? My voice was my best asset. I could dance, sure, but not well enough to ever turn that into a career in Hollywood. My big dream, starring in movie musicals and on Broadway, required the use of my voice. I prayed I hadn’t signed it away to Ursula.
“I’m going to take a look at your contract,” my dad said, sounding so level-headed and reasonable that I instantly regretted losing my cool. “I’ll see if there are any loopholes and let you know.”
I swallowed. “You don’t have to do that.”
“You’re my daughter,” he said. “I want to do it.”
He hung up the phone then, leaving me feeling cold despite the warm water and sunlight. I got out of the pool, wrapping the robe around myself again. I felt dirty.
Did I really sign my voice over to Ursula forever? I’d been so excited when I got the contract. It was possible I didn’t read it closely enough. I might have missed something. My dad was right, I wasn’t a lawyer. I’d thought I knew what I was doing, but the truth was that I just really, really wanted to succeed. Now I might have made it so that my success was literally impossible because Ursula now owned my voice.
I stumbled back inside Derek’s posh LA mansion, crawling up the stairs and getting in the shower. It would be hours until he got home. I washed, left him a note, and headed home. I needed to reread my contract and think.
25
Ariel
At first it was fun to have a secret. Everybody on set was always going on about Derek and Ursula and fawning over what a perfect couple they were. Their relationship practically had a fan club. Even off the set, it seemed like all the gossip magazines were having a field day. If their names fit together better, they’d probably have one of those terrible combination names. Like Bennifer. Or Brangelina. But ‘Dursula’ sounded terrible and ‘Ursulek’ sounded worse, so thankfully they didn’t even try.
But no matter what they were called, I knew the truth. Whenever she was hanging on him on set or acting like they had some incredible date planned, I knew that it was really just blackmail and pressure that kept him under her thumb.
Meanwhile, the movie was getting made around us. Derek and I made time for each other the best we could. It wasn’t exactly easy. I had a lot of songs I needed to record so that Ursula could lip-sync them. We were usually only a few days ahead of shooting. And because Derek didn’t know that I was doing Ursula’s voice work, I had to make up weird reasons why I couldn’t always meet him.
I’m not sure why I was keeping her secret from him. I guess I was just too honest. It had always been a bit of a fault of mine. But I just couldn’t bring myself to tell him. Besides, a tiny corner of my heart wasn’t entirely convinced that this would be a lasting thing. As much as I cared about Derek, as much as just being in his presence made my heart pound and my knees wobbly, I knew that he was a movie star. Movie stars and mortals don’t mix. I worried that if I told him and Ursula found out, my career would be over. I couldn’t rely on his protection, not really. It was better to protect myself.
Besides, I still had a mammoth problem. My contract. I’d read and reread it and yes, my dad was right, I’d signed away my voice in perpetuity. Until I figured out a way to fix it, my dad had swor
n me to adhering to the rest of it. He told me in no uncertain terms that if I somehow found myself in breach of contract with Ursula things would get even worse for me. So, until I managed to fix that problem, I was stuck. Derek went on thinking that Ursula could sing, and I had to listen to him duetting with my voice all day long. It was beyond frustrating.
Then there was the fact that he was always having to make press appearances that looked a whole lot like dates with Ursula. That didn’t exactly feel great on my ego, either.
“Where are you going tomorrow?” I asked Derek one evening after we made love at his house. I’d come in the back, as always, just to make sure that no one saw my car.
“Estrella again,” Derek said, looking disgusted. “I’m not sure why she’s so obsessed with that place.”
“Estrella? I’ve never heard of it. Is it a restaurant?”
He nodded. “It’s pretty much the romantic destination right now. It’s where everybody wants to have their hot dates.”
“Oh,” I said, chewing on my bottom lip. “That sounds nice.”
He frowned. “If I were going there with you, it might be.”
I smirked at him. “Maybe you can bring me home some cannoli.”
“Do you want me to?” he said. “I can. We could even have it delivered here some night, if you want to try the other food.”
I shrugged. “Sure. I like cannoli.”
I was smiling and making light, but it did sting. The fact that we couldn’t go out in public or tell anyone the truth was starting to feel terrible. What had been fun at first was now becoming a bit of a nightmare.
“I’m sorry I can’t take you out for real,” Derek said, reading my mind despite my best efforts. “It’s not going to last forever.”
I shook my head at him. “Don’t worry about it. Really. I knew what I was getting into.”
He didn’t look convinced. “I know. But I don’t think either one of us realized how hard it would be to keep this secret. I want to take you out.”
I believed him. I was learning that Derek was like me, radically honest. He didn’t mince words about his opinions or his beliefs. I liked that in a man.
It was obvious that all this secrecy was weighing on him, too. At least his texts to me during their fake dates were funny. But they were becoming less funny as time went on. Everybody else in the world thought that Ursula and Derek were the new golden couple of Hollywood. And everyone on set thought I was a horrible slut.
Things had been getting genuinely uncomfortable. It was hard enough to make friends on a movie set, but Ursula had been doing her very best to make everyone despise me.
The rumors about me being a slut had not gone away. Ursula’s plan to make the chorus girls turn against me had ramped up significantly when I was awarded a solo that gave them an extra reason to be jealous and catty. I tried my best to avoid listening to the little things that got back to me, but it did hurt.
Turning down all the men on set had been a chore as well. Who’d have thought being a slut would make me so popular. Only I wasn’t popular, exactly. I was infamous. And those men didn’t want to date me. They just wanted to sleep with me.
But I’d never been popular in my life, so the fact that I wasn’t popular now wasn’t the problem. The problem was that the other dancers were starting to undermine me in real ways. It was like high school bullying all over again.
On Monday, somebody stole my lunch. On Tuesday, I found my tights had been ripped apart and smeared with what looked like mascara. Wednesday, I got a short reprieve, but on Thursday I asked Flo which room we were meeting in and she told me the wrong one. I ended up having to run across the enormous studio in my sparkly little costume to get to the right place, and I was late again. If Ursula’s goal was to make sure that I felt as uncomfortable and unwanted as possible, she’d succeeded.
But at least I had Derek. As hard as it was to keep all these plates spinning, I knew that I had someone that wanted to spend time with me. We were really starting to get to know one another now, and it was incredible to me how normal he was. Despite his silver spoon upbringing, Derek was decidedly down to earth.
“Don’t worry,” I told him, reaching out to straighten his tie so he’d look good in the pictures with Ursula. “I know this is only temporary. This movie only films for three more weeks. Then, after the release, you’ll be free.”
He nodded. “I know. But it feels like forever.” He shook his head. “It’s a terrible feeling to go out and spend time with her and pretend that I’m in love with her. It feels like I’m cheating on you.”
“You’re not.”
“I know I’m not,” Derek said. “But it feels that way.”
I nodded. I knew how he felt. Sometimes when I was on set and saw them together, it felt like I was the one cheating. Like Derek and Ursula were the real couple and I was the one in the middle. Ursula’s glares and occasional snippy comments certainly made it feel that way. And the way the other chorus girls treated me, I felt like I should be wearing a huge scarlet letter.
“It’s only a secret for a while,” I told him, putting on a brave face. “We’re actors, aren’t we?”
26
Derek
“Hello darling,” Ursula said, linking up her arm with me and leading me back inside Estrella, the romantic Italian restaurant I’d ditched her at a few weeks back. “I thought we’d give this place another try.”
I nodded numbly. “Sure. Why not.” I sounded about as excited as I felt, which is to say, I was dreading every waking moment with Ursula lately. She was driving me up the wall.
“Smile,” she whispered in my ear. I complied reluctantly, and she kissed me on the cheek. “Thank you.”
Ursula had arranged for us to sit in the middle of the restaurant, as usual. I’d learned that she wasn’t happy eating unless the people around her had a 360-degree view. We settled in at the table and I saw Meg Butler sitting at a table just to our right. She winked at me and I smiled a shit-eating grin back at her.
I couldn’t wait for this movie to be over. If the early footage hadn’t been so amazing, I would have dropped out already. But despite all of Ursula’s posturing, jealously, and cruelty towards Ariel, she was doing an incredible job on set. Her singing was obviously world class, her dancing was perfectly credible, and her acting had never been in doubt. She was a legitimate triple threat.
The studio was so excited over it they could barely contain themselves from promoting it before we even had a final cut. I knew this production would be the one to push me over the top on my EGOTs goal. All I had to do was endure the filming. And the after-hours Ursula commitments like this one, awkward as they were.
“So,” Ursula said, sipping at her mimosa and staring at me down her nose condescendingly, “did you see the coverage of the Halloween party from last week?”
I shook my head at her. “No. I missed it. Was it what you wanted?”
“It’s exactly what we wanted,” Ursula replied. “Remember, you’re getting something out of this too, Derek. This isn’t just my dastardly plan. You benefit quite a bit.”
I nodded blandly. I knew she was right, but I definitely wouldn’t have traded my Friday night with Ariel if I had any choice. As much as I wanted my Oscar, I was beginning to think I might want Ariel more.
“In fact,” Ursula was saying, “the press loves us together so much, I was thinking we should take it up a notch.”
I frowned. “What does that mean?” I wasn’t making out with her on camera. If people wanted to see that, they could watch the movie. I didn’t want to do it more than absolutely necessary.
“What do you think about getting engaged?” Ursula asked, batting her eyelashes at me.
I froze. “What?”
Her expression was pitying. “Engaged. Betrothed. Promised. Pledged—”
“I know the definition of the word,” I stuttered. “I just wasn’t sure I heard you right.”
She smirked at me. “You did.”
&nbs
p; “You can’t be serious.”
Ursula was clearly dead serious. “Why are you looking at me like I just suggested you get a cock piercing? It would only be for show. And temporary. God, you’re so difficult. Why can’t you just get on board here? I’m helping us both. I feel like I shouldn’t have to drag you kicking and screaming the entire way. I know you’re in love with me.”
“I’m not pretending to get engaged to you.”
It was simply a step too far. I’d have to explain that to my family. It would be awkward. My brothers would never let me hear the end of it. And Ariel? It wasn’t fair to her. These secrets were getting out of hand.
“Look, I agreed to the terms of our deal. I’d be seen with you in public for the duration of the filming and promotion of the film.”
“Yes,” Ursula said. “That’s right. You did agree to that. And in exchange for what, exactly?”
“Do you really want to rehash your blackmail deal over breakfast?” I asked. “How about we just eat our waffles and smile at each other?”
I wanted to get home to Ariel. The thought of her waiting for me, of her knowing I was out with another woman, made my blood boil. I hated lies and secrets.
“I just want to remind you of our deal,” Ursula said. “I agreed not to ruin your mistress Ariel Cross’ fledgling little career and in return you agreed to help us both promote this movie as a couple. But there was one other thing I asked. Do you remember what it was?”
I frowned. “She’s not my mistress. But what are you getting at?”
“I’m getting at your lackluster performance on your side of the deal. Ariel Cross spent the night at your house last night. And last Friday, too.”
As soon as I swallowed my bite of waffle, my mouth fell open. “Are you having her followed?”
“Meg pretty much lives at your house these days,” Ursula replied. “She gave me a call. Thankfully nobody else saw her, but now we have a problem.”
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