"Black magic," Daphne says, her matter of fact tone destroying any doubts that she's joking.
I sigh and rub a hand over my face. What have I gotten myself into?
No. Wait. None of this is my fault. All I did is come to the academy I wanted.
"You have instructions about that? Where did you find them?" Excitement taints his words.
What is it with the people I know and their excitement about something so illegal. I've never had the urge to do anything wrong, and I don't think I pick people who want to be trouble makers either.
"Thomas found the books," Daphne answers him.
"Mr Smith," I explain, feeling like I'm not even part of this conversation.
"And you need my help?" Caspian frowns, clearly not understanding what she's getting at.
"It's a ceremony. No sacrifices, or anything weird like that. But we need four people plus Mona, or it won't work." "
"Ah. And you have the four people?"
"Hello? Are you two talking about my future and forgetting I'm stood right here?" I ask, even waving at them to try and get them to understand that I'm not invisible and they do need to include me. "We don't have four people."
"We can get them. Us two, Thomas, and my brother."
"Then I say we go for it."
"I'm sorry, what? You're just deciding that we're going to do a dangerous ceremony that could get us all arrested and I don't get a say in it?"
"No," Daphne says. "You say you don't want to do it, but you need to for your magic. We have to do this."
I look around the room, taking in my kittens. "Will they still be here after?" It's not something I want to truly consider, but there's a chance my kittens are just manifestations of my magic, and if that gets sorted, then maybe they'll go away.
"I doubt they'll disappear," Caspian says, scooping down and picking Ginger up off the floor.
Romeo looks up at her, pining in his eyes. Ryan named him well. That kitten is so in love, it's crazy. I wouldn't even think it's possible for a kitten to feel that way if I couldn't see it with my own eyes.
"I want to be sure of that. I'm not ready to say goodbye to them." Tears start to form unbidden. I'm not sure what's coming over me. I've never been this emotional about kittens before, that's for certain.
"You won't have to," Caspian assures me, stepping forward and tugging me into his arms.
I relax the moment I'm there. I don't want to be that girl, but something about his hug calms the storm raging inside me.
"You keep saying you need to fix what's wrong with you," he says softly. "Maybe this is your chance to do it?"
I nod against his chest.
"Fine." I twist in Caspian's arms so I can face my best friend. "But I want to be the one to ask Ryan." That request is more for Daphne's benefit than Caspian's, but I feel like it's best to get it out there and not have it hanging over us all.
"Deal." Daphne crosses her arms, a look of triumph flitting over her face. As far as she's concerned, she's gotten exactly what she wants, and more than that, she gets to learn about a new branch of magic. She may pretend it's just about helping me, but I know that's probably her real motivation.
Not that I mind, she's entitled to use the opportunity to learn as much as she can. That's why we all came to Grimalkin.
We certainly aren't here to do black magic, and yet that's the direction our lives have taken us. It's probably best I don't think about it too much.
Chapter Ten
"Are you okay? That's the third time you've zoned out," Ryan whispers.
"Yes. Sorry. Where were we?"
"We're trying to pay attention to class." He chuckles so softly, I almost miss it. Which is probably a good thing. I don't think our professor will take it lightly if we're not paying attention.
"Oh, right." I turn my eyes back to the front, to see some kind of presentation about the pyramids and the curses the Ancient Egyptians placed on tombs. Normally, it's the kind of thing that holds a lot of interest for me. At one point in my naive youth, I wanted to be an archaeologist. Specialising in finding magical treasure and making a name for myself. That's before all of my school career advisors pointed out how hard it is to actually follow that path.
Which leaves me with no idea what I want to do when I finish my education.
"Mona, what's wrong?"
"Nothing," I insist, not wanting to admit in the middle of Ancient Charms that I want him to help me with a black magic ritual and risk his freedom. Because that's what's on the line for us. I guess if we get arrested, I won't have to worry about my complicated love life.
The bell sounds, and I jump up from my seat along with half the class, stuffing my belongings into my bag even as the professor is trying to tell us what our required reading for the week is. I'm far too stressed to worry about that.
Instead, I half-run out of the room, heading away from everyone and everything. This is all too much at the moment. I don't want to have to ask Ryan such an awful thing. And yet, I don't want to have to ask Daphne to do it for me. And after that, I need to tell Thomas that I've said yes to it too. I'm sure he'll be thrilled. For the same reasons my best friend is, no doubt.
"Mona, wait up!" Ryan shouts.
I don't slow down. I want to cry, but I don't feel like I can go anywhere to do that. My room is full of kittens and potentially Daphne too. And everywhere else seems to have at least one guy in it.
Without really intending to, I end up in front of the entrance to the secret library. If I'm quick enough, I might even be able to disappear into it before Ryan catches up.
I pull the lever, and slip inside the moment the stone entrance opens.
A hand catches around my wrist, stopping me in my tracks.
"Mona, where are we?" Ryan's voice cracks as he asks.
"A secret library." There's no point lying to him now he's almost inside. He'll soon be able to work it out for himself.
"I didn't even know the school had one of these."
I choke back a laugh. "Of course you did. Isn't that what you had Daphne try and seduce a vampire for?" There's a hint of bitterness in my voice, probably because I know how upset she is over what went wrong with Heath.
Ryan hangs his head in shame. "Not my best move."
"No. It wasn't. But she's forgiven you."
"That was the vampire secret library. This...isn't that."
I shake my head. "Thomas showed me it."
"The teaching assistant you've been spending time with?" He doesn't sound as annoyed as he should, and I'm not sure if that's going to lead to another awkward conversation, or if its because Daphne is wrong about how her brother feels about me.
"That's the one," I admit. "He might be along soon." I'm not sure about that bit, but I don't want Ryan to be taken by surprise if Thomas does show up.
"I wonder why he showed you this place." Ryan walks around, staring at the huge bookcases with the same look of wonder Daphne had when she first saw it.
I've never seen them as much alike until this moment, but the two of them have more similarities than they think they do.
"He thought it might have some answers to what's wrong with me," I admit.
"Is he right?"
"Yes and no. He thinks he's found something that'll unlock my magic."
"That's amazing." There's real excitement in his voice. "What are we waiting for? Why haven't we done it yet?"
He closes the gap between us, but doesn't touch me. It doesn't stop me being aware of how close he is, though. I can feel the heat of his body radiating towards mine, and I can see the pulse beating beneath the skin of his throat.
Alright, that last one is a lie. Or just a reaction to the quick beating of my own heart.
"It's illegal."
"How illegal?"
"Are there levels of it?" I cock my head to the side and narrow my eyes, not too sure what he's on about.
"Of course. Something like drinking while under eighteen isn't nearly as bad as murder."
Oh. I suppose he
does have a point there. I never think about it in those terms.
"No one has to die."
"Which means it's pretty bad. You can't not tell me now."
I'm very aware that the two of us are just standing in the middle of the library, not wanting to break first and go do something somewhere else. At least we have the privacy here of saying and doing what we want.
My gaze darts to his lips, and then away again. I can't think about things like kissing him. That'll confuse things for me more, and I'm not ready for that.
At least, that's what I keep telling myself. It could just be a lie I'm using to justify a few things, though.
"It's black magic," I admit.
"Is that all?" Ryan laughs. "It's not that bad, Mona. I know loads of people who've done it."
"You do?" Daphne's never mentioned him being mixed up with the wrong sort, so it seems unlikely that he's done or seen anything too bad. In theory.
"Yes. Some by accident, but more than one did it on purpose. I've never done it myself. I've never had a reason to." He reaches out and brushes a lock of hair away from my face. "Do I now?"
"What do you mean?" My whole body shakes but I don't pull away. I'm not sure I could if I tried. He has me captivated in a way I never thought was possible.
Instead of answering, Ryan leans in and presses his lips against mine. At first, it takes me by surprise. But the moment I relax, it's magical. His arm slips around me, pulling me closer and deepening the kiss. His lips are soft, supple, warm, everything I want them to be. The fact he's my best friend's brother is pushed out of my mind. There's no chance he sees me as nothing more than Daphne's friend with the way he's kissing me now.
We break apart, both of us breathing heavily.
I lift my fingers to my lips, pressing them there and feeling the echo of his kiss.
"I guess you have to go on a date with me now," Ryan jokes.
"Because you agreed to do black magic for me?" It feels wrong to agree to a date in exchange for something so morally questionable.
"Of course not. I'd have said yes to that no matter what happens between us. I mean because of that kiss."
"Oh. Then I guess we do need to."
"Friday night at eight? There's a funfair in town? We can go do the bumper cars and get candy floss?" he suggests.
"I prefer ice cream." I kiss him on the cheek, hopefully showing that I'm just joking.
Life has a strange way of throwing me curve balls at the moment. I'm not sure how I'm in a secret library kissing Ryan and plotting to do illegal things. It's probably not something I'll be writing home to tell my parents about.
"Then we'll get ice cream. So long as it has sprinkles, and a flake.
"That sounds perfect to me," I admit. "I'm looking forward to it."
"Me too."
"And Ryan?"
"Yes, Mona." He hasn't moved, his arms still around me and his body close to mine.
"Thank you. For not just letting me run off right then."
"You're welcome. It would have been fairly remiss of me to let you."
I chuckle. "Maybe. But thank you all the same."
Chapter Eleven
Thomas stumbles under the weight of all the things he's carrying, and I rush forward to take some from him.
"Is this all really necessary?" I ask.
He nods. "You read the spell, right?"
"More like scanned it," I admit, taking the top box from his pile and setting it on the table in the middle of the secret library. "Daphne filled me in on the rest."
Thomas chuckles. "Why shouldn't I be surprised?"
He brushes past me, our bodies almost touching and reminding me of my moment here with Ryan. The ghost of a kiss traces my lips, and it's all I can do not to lift my fingers there. I don't want to have to explain what I'm feeling to Thomas. Not when I'm not sure how he feels about me.
"What's all this stuff for?" I frown. If I recall what Daphne said, the ceremony is more about where people are standing in relation to me, rather than anything else.
"You can't just do black magic, you have to set everything up for it."
I glance at the pile of things, nerves fluttering in my stomach. It's full of things like black candles and red silks on the outside, but I know underneath there's probably some things that are less savoury.
"How long have you been studying black magic?" The question comes out without me meaning it to, and I'm sure it sounds far ruder than I intend for it too.
Thomas chuckles. "If you mean doing spells, this'll be the first time. If you mean how long I've been researching it for, something like ten years. I've always found it fascinating."
I nod, kind of understanding where he's coming from. There is something intriguing about things we shouldn't be doing. Including black magic. If I didn't have interests in other things, maybe I'd have been researching it myself for that long.
"Are you...excited?" That isn't quite the right word, but I don't know what else to go with.
"I'm nervous." He pulls a set of stone goblets out of one of the boxes, and places it on the table. "And intrigued. But I wouldn't say excited. This is far too serious for that." He looks straight at me, something deep in his eyes.
I glance away, unable to deal with the emotions I can sense there. I need him to go back to being a little more matter of fact. That I'm able to deal with. This, not so much.
"What do we do with those?" I ask.
"We drink out of them. They're goblets."
"I know what they are," I counter. "I'm just not sure what they're for."
"Drinking the blood of virgins," he deadpans, and it takes me a few moments to catch on that he's joking.
"Now for the serious answer?" I prompt.
"I've heard rumours that spells like this are easier if there's some kind of bond between the people performing them. I thought that if we have a sacred drink and blessing before doing it, then it might help."
"That sounds kind of like a wedding," I mutter.
"I guess in some ways it is," Thomas admits.
Oops. He wasn't supposed to hear me say that.
"But one between souls, not one of love."
"I can't say you're reassuring me much." I pull out one of the swathes of red silk, letting the material fall to the floor. "Erm...is this a dress?"
"A toga," he corrects, setting down the goblets, and coming over to me. "That one's for you."
"I have to wear a red silk toga?" Now this really is starting to sound like some kind of virgin sacrifice.
"Yes. And we have black ones." He points to more silk in the boxes. "I don't know if actually does something to help, or if it just sets the tone..."
"Yes. The gothic nightmare tone." How have I let myself be talked into this? Surely my magic isn't more important than my morals? Or those of my friends.
"I can tell what you're thinking." Thomas brushes a thumb against my cheek.
My traitorous eyes flutter close, loving his touch and the comfort it's bringing despite the circumstances. I snap them back open, determined not to be seduced into this.
"I'm not thinking anything," I counter.
"You are. You're wondering what you've got yourself into, how you let your friends take this risk, and if it's all worth it."
"Well, ah...yes. Okay." I pull back from him and drop the silk onto one of the chairs.
"It's not hard to work out, Mona. You're understandably worried. But all of us know what's on the line. You're not forcing us into doing something we don't want to..."
His words are interrupted by the shriek of the stone. We exchange worried looks. Is someone coming in?
I pull my phone from my pocket, and shake my head when I don't see a text from Daphne. She'd warn us if she's coming, mostly to avoid the panic we're both now feeling.
Thomas grabs the goblets and sticks them back into the box, while I gather up the silk. He gestures to a little alcove, but I know it's best if we don't bring the things with us. I shove the bag under the table
, hoping whoever is coming doesn't notice it's there.
He does the same with his box and pulls me in the direction of the alcove. Luckily, there's a curtain to the side that we can pull across to hide once we're inside.
Thomas pushes me against the wall, making me even more aware of the proximity of his body than before. His heart beats as fast as mine, the adrenaline of the situation building up within us. He draws the curtain close, sealing us off from immediate sight. So long as we don't make a noise, or the person on the other side isn't averse to closed drapes, we should remain undiscovered.
I don't know what will happen if someone catches us here. In theory, just being here doesn't break any rules because it's not in there. Though I imagine there is something about a teaching assistant spending alone time with a student in a very crowded space.
Yes. Probably best if we don't get caught. Thomas has a lot at risk if we do, especially when we both know I won't get more than a slap on the wrist.
"Where are the books?" Thomas whispers.
"In my room," I respond, just as quietly.
He nods. "Can you ask Daphne to make sure they're still there?"
"She's still in class." But even so, I'm pulling out my phone to text her, glad that we've moved past the era of loud keys that announce when someone is sending a text. Touch screens are much better for stealthy communication.
"We need to know no one's found them."
"You think that's why they're here?" Dread curls in the pit of my stomach. Without thinking about it, I grasp hold of Thomas' shirt and twist it into a little ball from my nerves.
"I'm sure it's just a coincidence."
He's only saying it to help keep me calm, but I appreciate it all the same.
"Are you sure about what you saw, Agatha?" Miss Feathertop's voice comes into the library.
Oh no. That's not good. We're not nameless faces to her.
Thomas slips his arm around me, pulling me closer. He's peeking through the gap between the curtain and the entrance to our little alcove, but I'm not so sure I can be that brave.
"Absolutely. I'm not sure what she's up to, but that girl is trouble," a second woman, probably Agatha, replies.
Second Time's A Curse Page 6