by Monroe, Max
“No.” Her cheeks flush, but giggles follow. “I just thought I was doing it inside my own head.”
Goddamn, she’s so fucking cute, I can hardly stand it.
I tap her nose with my finger. “Your song, princess?”
“Why don’t you tell me which song you think I’m going to choose first?”
“‘Take Me Home, Country Roads.’ Or, at least, I think that’s the title. It’s an older song, so I don’t know—”
Billie turns around slightly to slap a hand to my shoulder and cuts me off before I can finish. “Get out of my head!”
“Is that the song?”
“Yes.” She slaps me again. “That’s the freaking song.”
“Well, no need for violence,” I tease, and a few chuckles mix in with my words.
“Don’t be such a baby.” She grins. “And, for someone who doesn’t even really listen to music, I can’t believe you guessed it.”
“It’s a good song. One of a few I actually do know. Although, I couldn’t tell you who sings it.”
“John Denver,” she answers without hesitation, but then her voice goes quiet. “That’s a very special song to me.”
“Because it mentions West Virginia?”
“Because it was my daddy’s favorite song. He listened to it all the time,” she explains, her voice now filled with a mixture of melancholy and love. “He always said Momma was his country road.”
“That’s…really sweet.” I might be a dick most of the time, but I’m not completely emotionless. “It sounds like your parents really loved each other.”
“Yeah,” she says, but when tears start to shine in her eyes, she quickly changes the subject. “Do you want to know another favorite song?”
“Of course.”
“‘I’m on Fire’ by Bruce Springsteen.”
I smirk. “I don’t even think I know that song.”
“It’s a great song. My favorite line dancing song.”
That spurs another laugh from my throat. “How could a Bruce Springsteen song ever be a line dancing song?”
“Once you hear it, you’ll understand.”
I waggle my brows at her. “You wear the sexy cowgirl boots when you line dance?”
“You thought my boots were sexy?”
I smirk. “Yes, before you lost them at the bottom of the river, I thought they were sexy. Much better than the UGGs.”
Billie blushes again, this time through a smile, but then she starts singing a song about her boots being made for walking, and it’s so off-key that it’s fucking adorable—she’s so fucking adorable—and I can’t stop myself from tilting her chin up toward me and pressing a soft kiss to her lips.
“What was that for?”
I shrug. “Because I felt like it.”
A yawn escapes her throat, and I give her a little squeeze.
“Tired?”
She shrugs. “I probably shouldn’t be, but I think I am a little.”
I glance down toward my feet to find Bailey doing the same thing, only he stretches out across a blanket on the ground and gives in to the pull of sleep. His eyes fall closed and his jaw goes slack, and it isn’t long before he’s snoring.
Billie glances down at Bailey and giggles. “Looks like I’m not the only one.”
“When that dog is tired, he’s fucking tired, and there isn’t anything or anyone that can get him to do otherwise.”
“I’ve noticed.” She grins down at him for a beat before meeting my eyes again. “How old is he?’
“A little over five years.”
“He’s a good dog.”
“Yeah.” I snort. “When he wants to be.”
A tickled smile consumes her face. “He stole two protein bars from my backpack.”
“What?” I laugh. “You didn’t tell me he did that.”
“It happened on the first day,” she explains. “We weren’t exactly on speaking terms. I’m pretty sure you kind of hated me.”
I grin. “Well, I wouldn’t say hate, but I certainly wasn’t your biggest fan.”
She turns in my lap, her legs straddling my thighs and her arms around my neck. “And now?”
I adjust the blanket around us again, tucking us both away from the cold, and look into her eyes. “And now…I definitely don’t hate you.”
“I don’t hate you either,” she whispers. “If I’m being honest, I think I like you a little too much.”
I want to agree, to say something to confirm that she’s not alone in her feelings, but I’m so deep in my head, I can’t even find my mouth to open it.
“What are we doing here, Luca?” she asks, her voice even lower now, just barely a whisper.
“We’re sleeping under the stars,” I tease, and she rolls her eyes.
“You know that’s not what I asked.”
“I know,” I answer honestly and lean my forehead against hers. “But I also don’t know the answer to your question. Although, I can’t seem to stop doing it…whatever it is.”
“Me either.” Her warm breath brushes my lips, and I don’t hesitate to press my mouth to hers again.
“I keep telling myself we shouldn’t be doing this,” she says against my insistent lips. “But then, I just keep doing it. Can’t stop doing it.” She deepens the kiss, and I oblige by slipping my tongue past her lips.
She’s right. We shouldn’t be doing this.
It’s downright insane to be doing this—whatever this even is…
But fuck, I’m man enough to admit that I’m powerless against her pull. She’s a planet with gravity, and I’m ready to dart straight into her orbit.
Our kiss turns heated, and Billie’s hips start to grind against me.
I’m hard. Fuck, lately, I’m always hard when she’s around.
Her pretty lips. Her perfect curves. Those big green eyes. I am incapable of resisting.
The tension between us grows so tight, so potent, that we both turn greedy.
Grabby hands and rough, erratic kisses and her moans, her fucking moans, they are driving me fucking crazy.
Still kissing me, Billie moves her small hands down my chest and stops at the button of my jeans. She fumbles with it for a moment, but once it releases, she doesn’t hesitate to undo my zipper and slip one devious hand into my pants, beneath my boxer briefs, and grip me in her hand.
Her skin is cold against me, but it’s her skin on mine, so it can’t feel anything but good.
Up and down, she strokes me until I can’t take it anymore.
I lift her up with ease, setting her to her feet long enough to yank her yoga pants and panties down to her knees with my fucking teeth, and then ease her back onto my lap, directly onto my cock.
Fuck.
She is wet and warm and fucking perfect, and I slide myself all the way in, filling her up and feeling the heaven that is being inside Billie.
“God, yes,” she says through a moan and leans her head onto my shoulder.
I’m too lost in her to notice that the blanket is no longer on us, and that if anyone were out in the woods, they would see us.
“More,” she moans into my ear. “More, more, more.”
But I’m not the only one who’s too lost to care about our exposed state.
I grip her hips and guide her up and down my length, and it’s so good and she is gripping me so tight, I’d have to be a fucking superhero to last longer than mere minutes.
Fuck.
I reach forward and place my fingers at the apex of her thighs, rubbing my middle and index finger in smooth circles against her clit.
Billie’s moans get louder.
And my thrusts get faster, deeper, more erratic.
Her pussy grips me tighter, and I know she’s close.
“Oh god,” she whispers and moans. “I’m going to come.”
“That’s it,” I whisper into her ear, still touching her, still sliding in and out of her, “Come on my cock, princess.”
Her moans get louder, her breaths turning t
o pants, and when her thighs start shaking and her pussy grips me like a vise, I see fucking stars behind my eyes. She goes lax in my arms, and I don’t last much longer after that, sliding in and out of her until my climax consumes me and I finish inside her.
“Why is it always so damn good?” she mutters through a panting breath. “That should be illegal.”
Her words surprise a soft laugh out of my lungs. “Tell me about it.” I place a kiss to her hair. “Fucking tell me about it.”
It probably should be illegal for an asshole of a man like me to experience the warmth and softness and beauty that is Billie. She is a goddess, and I am the guy who had to escape Hollywood because he wasn’t strong enough to survive it.
More negative thoughts threaten to consume my mind, but when she leans her head back, grips my chin with her fingers, and pulls my lips to hers again, those nagging thoughts disappear into thin air.
If you didn’t know you’re utterly consumed by her, you should have one hell of a grasp on it now…
“Come cuddle me in your sleeping bag?” she asks, her lips still brushing mine.
I couldn’t say no to her if someone had a fucking gun to my head right now.
“Of course, princess.”
Twenty minutes later, just as she requested, Billie and I are cuddled up in my sleeping bag, and Bailey is cozy on top of a fleece blanket, sound asleep in the corner of the tent.
His damn snores are so loud, so deep, I know he’s down for the fucking count.
Billie’s giggles fill my ears. “For no hiking today, that dog is exhausted.”
“I wish I could sleep as well as he does.”
“You’re a light sleeper, aren’t you?”
I smirk. “What tipped you off to that?”
“Because you’re always up before me, and I’m pretty sure I always fall asleep before you.”
“That sounds about right,” I agree. “I can’t remember a time in my life when I actually slept well. It takes me forever to fall asleep, and once I do, I can’t stay asleep for more than four or five hours.”
“Good God, that’s awful.”
I shrug. “I’m used to it by now.”
Billie cuddles closer to me, her back to my chest, and I wrap my arms tighter around her. She sighs in contentment, and the sound is so sweet, it makes my heart skip a fucking beat.
You are so fucking lost in her, it’s not even funny.
Fuck. I refuse to think about this right now.
There is so much uncertainty. So many unknowns, and I’m just not ready to really wrap my mind around what’s going on between us.
Yeah, but you’re running out of time, you avoiding bastard.
I shake off my thoughts, refusing to delve into that mindfuck of a thought process, and force myself to focus on something else.
When I start thinking about the song “Country Roads,” Billie’s favorite song, a question pops into my mind that I feel compelled to ask her.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
“Why was my reading this screenplay so important to you?” I ask. “I know it’s because of your job, but… I mean, I could be wrong, but it feels like there is a little more to it than just your boss wanting me to read the screenplay because she thought I’d be good for the part.”
“Well…” Billie goes quiet for a long minute.
“Well…?” I ask, opening my eyes and blinking against the darkness inside our tent until I can see her face clearly.
“You’re not completely wrong…”
I quirk a brow, and she digs her teeth into her bottom lip as she tilts her head to the side a bit and locks her eyes with mine.
“After I recommended you for the part and Serena thought it was a brilliant idea…I kind of…sort of…maybe told her that I knew you…”
“What?” A shocked laugh bursts from my lungs. “You told her you knew me?”
Billie sighs long and deep. “I swear I’m not generally a liar or someone who stretches the truth. But fucking ass-kissing Charles is making my life a living hell, and I just kind of said it without even thinking.”
“Who is ass-kissing Charles?”
“My archnemesis at work,” she answers, but her eyes turn uncertain as they search mine. “We’re both vying for the same job—a mentorship with Serena Koontz.”
“I see.”
“Are you mad?” she asks, her voice so quiet, I almost didn’t hear it.
Am I mad? I probably should be.
In a roundabout way, I guess I could feel like I’ve become some kind of pawn in her Hollywood career games. But with her inside my arms and her soft, vulnerable eyes staring into mine, I can’t muster a single negative emotion about her.
Obviously, she came here to talk me into doing that movie, but deep down, I know that whatever is happening between us wasn’t something she planned. It just happened.
At least I think so.
“Please don’t be mad at me,” she begs on a whisper.
“I probably should be,” I respond, and uncertainty makes her eyes bounce around my face. Fuck, I don’t want her to be insecure. I don’t want her to be anything but confident and strong. “But no,” I don’t hesitate to add. “I’m not mad. If anything, I think I admire you more.”
“Admire me more?” A shocked giggle jumps from her lips. “What the hell?”
“Well, you’re here, aren’t you?” I retort. “I mean, it takes some balls to bite off more than you can chew but still not give up.”
“What can I say?” Billie just shrugs, a little smile on her lips. “I have big, huge balls.”
“Now, I know that’s not true,” I contest with a wink, and she smiles.
“Metaphorically speaking, that is.”
I laugh.
“I also think,” she starts to add, “the fact that my momma always told me I would end up working in Hollywood has something to do with me never giving up…” She pauses with a secret smile on her lips. “Even if that means going to crazy extremes, like tracking someone down in Alaska.”
“And sticking around when they ask you to leave,” I add with a smirk.
She rolls her eyes.
“But…if it makes you feel any better…I’m happy you’re here now.”
She smiles at me, but it’s not a big smile or a secret smile, it’s an open smile, one that makes me feel like I’m seeing her heart too. “Me too.”
God. Her eyes. I could lose myself completely inside of them.
I press a tender kiss to her lips, letting my mouth linger against hers for just a moment, before pulling away and pressing another one to her forehead and adjusting her a bit in my arms.
I don’t know what it is about Billie, but everything she does—everything she is—makes me feel oddly proud and protective. I want to cheer her on but shield her from any kind of danger or pain at the same time.
But I know to my core she doesn’t need to be shielded from pain.
Billie is strong. What she’s already told me about her past is evidence of that.
“Can I ask you another question?”
She nods her head.
“How did your parents die?”
When she doesn’t respond right away, I add, “If you don’t want to tell me, I understand. I was just curious.”
“It’s okay,” she says, her voice small. “I was nine when they died, and you’d think, at twenty-four, it’d be easier to talk about it, but it’s still hard. I’m pretty sure it’ll always be hard.”
“That’s understandable.” I squeeze her gently. “Losing your parents at such a young age is fucking tragic.”
“They died in a car accident,” she tells me, the tone of her voice both an open book and vulnerable. “Birdie and I lost both our parents at the same damn time because of a drunk driver. The reality is so clichéd, it almost doesn’t sound real. It’s something you think just happens in movies to add drama to a plot, but then it happens to you, and it’s almost too hard to belie
ve.”
“Jesus,” I mutter. “That’s…horrible, princess.”
“Yeah.”
I stare down at our entwined fingers, feeling compelled to open up to her in ways that are completely foreign for a guy like me.
“Even though my story isn’t as tragic as yours and my parents are still alive, on some level, I know what it’s like to lose your parents. You lost your parents to a car accident, and I lost my parents to Hollywood.”
“How long has it been since you’ve spoken to them?”
“Eight years.”
“And what about your sister?”
“About the same,” I answer honestly. “Which makes me feel like a real bastard. She never did anything wrong, but I just couldn’t be a part of that life anymore. I had to cut ties with everything and everyone in order to survive. I was becoming someone I didn’t want to be. Someone I didn’t recognize.”
“Did you try to tell them you weren’t happy?” she asks.
“My parents got too lost in the greed and the fame, so much so that it ended up being the end of their marriage. I was at my lowest fucking point when their nasty divorce went public, which only fueled the fire of my issues,” I admit.
Besides Lou, Billie is the first person I’ve ever told any of this. The realization damn near grips me by the throat, but I swallow past it and keep going.
“And, well, after their marriage ended, they both turned their backs on Hollywood completely—Mom went off to fucking Barbados with some guy, and Dad pretty much did the same, from what I know. And my sister, Rocky—well, you probably know her as Raquel—she tried to understand what was going on with me, I think. But mostly, she just wasn’t feeling the same way about everything as I was. She wanted to keep going. Appeared happy to keep going. But there’s a part of me that always wonders if that was a façade, you know? Or hell, maybe she’s just better at coping with things than I am? I don’t know.”
“Do you ever think about reaching out to them?”
“My parents? No. Never.” I shake my head without hesitation. “I think I still have too much animosity toward them because of what they did to Rocky and me. Our childhood was stolen because of their Hollywood dreams. But, my sister? Yeah.” The truth makes my chest ache, and I pause for a moment as I try to find the right words to explain a situation that probably comes across as cold and harsh to someone else.