* * *
“WE COULD GO inside with Mom and Rosie,” Matt suggested as Dana shivered against him.
“I like this,” she murmured, snuggling closer to him and leaning her head on his shoulder.
Matt liked the way she tucked into his side, too, and was happy not to move, although the boat was making its final loop and heading back to the dock. He considered suggesting a nightcap somewhere or maybe a walk down to Navy Pier, but it was late. His mother and Rosie would be tired and he’d promised them a ride home.
“What is it?” Dana asked at his sigh.
“I don’t want the evening to end.”
“Me neither. I suppose your mother and sister will want to go right home after?”
Matt chuckled. “I was thinking the same thing. Now I wish I hadn’t offered to drive them. Maybe they could take a taxi.”
“I have to go into the office tomorrow anyway.” Then she murmured, “But it would have been nice to have you all to myself.”
He bent to kiss the top of her head. “It was a great evening, Dana. One my family will remember. Thanks for the idea.”
“It’s one I’ll remember, too, Matt. Thank you for inviting me.”
He hugged her closer. “Your father showing up, was that a surprise?”
Dana shifted so she could see his face. “Totally. But it’s where he often meets friends or clients.”
“From the look on your face, I wondered if you thought he’d come to check up on you.”
Dana’s laugh was half-hearted. “I hate to admit it was my first thought, but only because it’s the kind of thing he’s done before. But no, he didn’t know we’d be there.”
“I saw him sizing me up. I gather he didn’t know about me?”
“I haven’t told him very much about you. Only that you ran the drop-in and the camp. I realize now I ought to have. Maybe he sensed a vibe between us. Although he’s not usually that intuitive when it comes to people’s feelings.”
“I don’t know about that. He was gracious to my mom and Rosie. Seemed genuinely pleased that they were going on this cruise.”
“He’s a successful corporate lawyer with good social skills.”
Matt thought she was dismissing her father too easily but kept quiet. She’d mentioned some issues between them and he didn’t want to ruin the evening with a discussion about family dynamics. But after a moment, he asked, “I’m curious. Have you told him about—”
“That day?” Dana moved away to look into his face.
“Yeah. That day. Funny how we both sum it up in two short words.”
“No, I haven’t.”
“Why not?”
There was enough ambient light to see she was resisting answering that question. He felt for her, knowing he’d hate to have to answer it himself.
“I tried a couple of times to tell him about problems I was having at school and how I felt lonely and isolated, but he was always so busy.”
Matt looked away from the sadness in her face and voice, wishing he hadn’t asked.
“But I never told him about that day because I knew I’d have to go through all that again and I wasn’t sure if he’d understand any of it.”
Matt pulled her against him. As the dock came into sight, she lifted her head slightly to ask, “What about you? Have you ever told your mother?”
“No, I haven’t,” he finally said, relieved that docking had interrupted the next question he was afraid she’d ask—why not?
Matt felt his mother’s eagle eyes trained on his back when he hugged Dana goodbye. “Will you call me tomorrow?”
“Of course,” she murmured.
“And still planning to come to the camp for the weekend, I hope?”
“Yes.” She stroked his cheek with her hand. “You’d better go. They’re looking a bit tired.”
“Yes. Okay, good night and thanks again.” Not exactly the place or the time to tell her what he really wanted to say.
He waited a minute longer as she hailed a taxi before heading toward Rosie and his mother. “Come on, ladies, let’s get you home.”
They took a cab to his car, parked closer to the restaurant. The ride home was quiet and when he pulled up to the bungalow, his mother said, “Mati, why don’t you spend the night? It’s late and I can see you’re tired, too.”
He was tired, true, and he also had an urge to spend more time with his mother and sister. Dana had been right about the need for a break. Plus, the brief talk he’d had with her about that day made him realize he needed to tell his mother. Maybe after her surgery.
Esperanza insisted on pouring them a small shot of her twelve-year-old rum before bed. “I’d like to make a toast,” she announced. “To my beautiful daughter and handsome son. Thank you for making my life so joyful.” Her eyes filled and she had to wait before adding, “Your father would be so proud of you both.”
Rosie rushed to her side, sniffling. “Mama, you’re the best.”
Matt couldn’t speak. He wrapped his arms around his mother and bent his head to hers, feeling her breathe against him and not wanting that moment to end.
“Okay, you two. I’m going to get ready for bed and, Mati, yours is made up for you.”
As it always was, Matt knew. The room and bed, always there for him whenever he needed it.
When Esperanza bustled off, Rosie said, “She had such a good time, Matt. It was so special for her. Thank you.” She reached up to hug him.
“Do you really think I’m not sentimental?” he asked when she pulled back.
“I was teasing you, brother. But I must say...” She hesitated.
“What? C’mon. Spill.”
“Honestly, I think you’ve changed recently.”
“How?”
“Happier maybe. Not sporting your usual frown and stress lines.”
“You should have seen me on Sunday.” He gave her a quick recap of the events at Camp Hope, omitting the meeting with Lenny.
She shook her head. “Horrible, especially that councilor guy. Still, you managed to take the time for tonight. That wouldn’t have happened before.”
“Before?”
She tapped his shoulder with her fist. “Before Dana, silly.” Then, “She means something to you, doesn’t she?”
He nodded. “Something important.”
“Then don’t screw it up!”
“I won’t, believe me.”
“Okay, I’m off to bed.”
“Wait a sec, Rosie. Are you still interested in doing something about video games at KidsFirst?”
“Did Dana talk to you?” She gave him a suspicious look.
“She said you were excited at the idea and asked me, ‘Why not?’”
“And your answer?”
“Yeah, why not?”
Rosie threw her arms around him again. “Thanks, big brother. You made my day. Well, along with my other exciting news, that is.” She kissed him on the cheek. “You won’t be sorry.”
He held her tight for a minute longer. “Never, Rosie. I’d never be sorry about anything that concerned you.”
“Good night. See you in the morning, maybe.” She disappeared down the hall, slamming doors behind her.
Esperanza came into the kitchen, shaking her head. “That girl. What’s she revved up about?”
“I told her she could do a class at the drop-in.”
Esperanza cinched the belt of her robe and sat down at the table. “Good, Mati. She wanted that. Now, sit.”
He did. She reached across the table for his hand. “I want to talk to you about the future.”
Matt gave a shaky laugh. “The whole future or just the immediate one?”
“Don’t be smart. Just listen. I know I have a good prognosis and that my surgery isn’t going to be half as scary as it would have been if I
needed a mastectomy or chemo. But I also know there’s a five-year waiting period to see if the cancer comes back, and my doctor told me the statistics.”
Matt gritted his teeth, wishing he could talk to that doctor for a few minutes.
“I have plenty of time to tell you about my hopes and dreams for you and Rosie, but tonight I saw something in your face when you were talking to Dana. And I realized you might not always be just my Mati, the one who comes over every Sunday for dinner or cuts my grass and shovels my walk. The one who phones regularly and keeps me in his life.”
“Ma—”
Esperanza held up her other hand. “Shhh. It’s all right. I’m not going to get too sentimental.” She smiled and patted his cheek.
“I think Dana—and I have to say that Rosie and I like her very much—is going to play a big part in your life. And that’s good, Mati. I’ve been praying for ages for you to find someone like her.”
“It’s early days yet, Ma.”
“I can tell these things,” she said with a certainty he didn’t share. “My hope for a future when I’m not here—” She shushed him again as he opened his mouth. “Is that you will also always have Rosie in your life. She’s an adult and she’s planning to move out to be really independent. But her future is uncertain and—”
“Ma. You don’t have to worry about Rosie. I’ll always watch out for her.”
Esperanza took a tissue from her robe pocket and blew her nose. “That’s all I needed to hear. That’s my big speech.”
Her smile was sweetly indulgent, Matt thought. A smile he’d seen many times in his childhood and youth. He cleared his throat and said, “Ma, I have something to tell you.”
He didn’t leave anything out—the shoplifting, the initiation tasks to be accepted into Lenny’s gang, especially the last one, when he’d been ordered to go to Oak Park to break into houses and take trophies back to Lenny. He also reassured her he would have quit rather than get involved in any violence.
She kept her eyes fixed on his throughout the whole sordid tale but didn’t show any emotion until he told her about that day and Dana, the fall onto the tracks and his rescue. Then she gasped in horror, covering her mouth with her hand.
“Mati, Mati,” she moaned, shaking her head in disbelief. “Think what could have happened! What were you thinking? Was there no one else to help? No transit person?”
“There was no one there but me, her and those kids. And I wasn’t thinking, Ma. It was pure impulse and I know how lucky I am that it was all good.” He placed his hand on her arm, stroking it until her trembling stopped. “I’m so sorry, Ma. If it’s any consolation, those few seconds on the tracks made me realize that I wanted to be around for you and Rosie. That’s the real reason I enlisted in the army. To get away from the gang and to make something of myself. I know enlisting must have frightened you, but considering my lack of options at the time, it seemed the best one. I must have sensed that what I most needed, besides a secure income for my family, was discipline. Along with a regular paycheck.”
“You did make something of yourself, Mati. And I’m proud that you got Sandro away from all that, too.” Esperanza said. She dabbed at her eyes and nose. “I knew something was going on with you back then. On my way to work one day, I saw you walking on the street with Sandro and another boy I didn’t know. He looked tough, not someone I’d want you to be friends with. It was a school day, too, but I didn’t say anything because I was afraid of pushing you further away. You were snarly and moody those days, never home or coming in late. Not going to school. I got so many phone calls from that school.”
Yet she never mentioned any of that. Maybe waiting for him to tell her what was up? Matt’s realization of what she went through pained him.
You can’t go back to change things, he told himself, but you can change the way your life plays out going forward. And he had. He only hoped that whatever future was ahead for him, it was one with Dana in it.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“NICE EVENING?”
Dana glanced up from the memo she was writing. Her father leaned against the frame of her office door, smiling.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Don’t be so touchy.” He walked up to her desk. “Did everyone enjoy the cruise?”
Dana softened her tone. “Yes, they did, and yes, it was a nice evening. More than nice.”
“Uh-huh? I got the impression that you and Matt are also more than just friends.”
“I think we’re definitely heading in that direction.” She set her pen down.
“How much do you know about him?”
Here it comes, Dana thought, the inquisition. “Dad, I don’t have time to give you a full CV on the man. He’s a loving son and brother. He cares about kids, especially kids who don’t have many adults who do care about them. He’s thoughtful and kind. An upright citizen. That good enough?”
Brent raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay. But, Dana...take your time with this. All of us have our hidden pasts.”
Speechless, Dana stared at him. It was an odd thing for him to say. She knew about her own hidden past, but what was his?
“I just sent you an email with the details of the property I’m recommending to Nirvana,” he went on. “Check it out, maybe make some calls and get back to me. Then you and I can contact Lim and work out an offer. The listing just came up, so we have a bit of time, but it looks good. Early bird and all that.” He rapped his knuckles a couple of times on her desk and left.
So, no inquisition, but a cryptic remark that would bug her all day. Dana sighed and checked her email. Two minutes later she was storming into her father’s office, oblivious to his assistant’s arm waving.
“You can’t do it! No way. You have to find another location.”
“What? What the heck, Dana...” He gestured to one of the firm’s new lawyers sitting in front of his desk. “Give us a minute, please, Sarah.”
Dana bit down hard on her lip as the younger woman excused herself and left.
“Sit down and get control of yourself,” Brent ordered. “Deep breaths. You know the drill.”
She did. It had been many years since her father had needed to calm her and she had a flash of despair. The insecurity and anxiety that had plagued her teen years were still there, right beneath the surface, in spite of all her hard work. She peered down at her clenched hands, her heart rate slowing.
“Now, tell me what’s wrong.”
“The property listing you sent me, the one you’re recommending to Nirvana. It’s...it’s the camp!”
Brent frowned. “Slow down, Dana. Are you referring to Camp Hope?”
She nodded without looking up. When she could safely speak, she raised her head. “The property where the camp is situated belongs to Willow Springs, but the camp has a lease agreement—”
“Which expires at the end of this month. I had no idea the camp mentioned in the listing was Camp Hope, Dana. It’s not named. The description only refers to a main lodge and outbuildings, ‘currently used as a camp.’ That’s it.”
“I don’t understand how this can happen,” she said, shaking her head. “Matt’s making a presentation to Willow Springs council on Monday night. They’re asking for a five-year lease extension.”
“I doubt that’s going to happen,” Brent muttered dryly.
“Camp Hope is Matt’s dream! He spent years working for it. The camp can’t close down. Those kids need it! You’ll have to find another property for Nirvana.”
“Dana, Dana, hold on. First of all, the property is up for sale. By the very council that’s supposedly hearing this presentation you’ve mentioned. And second, it’s ideal for Nirvana. They want a place near water that’s within driving distance of Chicago.”
“There are other places, Dad. Just look for them. You haven’t contacted Nirvana yet, have you
?”
“I told Nirvana I’ve found something. I haven’t specified where yet.”
“Then don’t. It’s not too late.”
“You’re missing the point. My searching for another place won’t change the fact that Willow Springs intends to sell the property. Face it. This whole thing with the camp and the drop-in, it’s taken a huge toll on your work here. I feel that this camp has become an obsession! Volunteering isn’t your career, the law is.”
He was right. But she couldn’t—and wouldn’t—accept the inevitable, as he’d implied. The council had to be persuaded to change its mind. “I can’t work with you on this. I’m recusing myself.” She got up and started to leave.
“Wait! You’re not being realistic. Don’t jeopardize everything you’ve worked for because of some infatuation for this camp and its owner. Anyway, you have no monetary or moral conflict here for recusal.”
She paused in the doorway. “No, but I have an emotional one. And I’m going to do everything I can to make sure this deal doesn’t go through and that KidsFirst gets to keep the camp.” Her voice began to wobble, so she walked out, slamming the door behind her.
Ten minutes later, Dana decided the day was a write-off. She shoved the Nirvana file into Brent’s inbox and left the building before her father could make one last pitch for her to stay on the case.
Her immediate impulse was to call Matt, but as her anger subsided, she realized she needed to take some time to work everything out. She opted to go home and get her thoughts in order before talking to him. But he called first, while she was on the subway.
“I can’t get down to work today,” he said, his voice low and dreamy.
Dana lowered her voice. “Same for me. I’m on the subway on my way home. Can I call you later?”
“Oops, my bad. Yes, please. I’m taking some supplies to the camp for the weekend. We’ve got the same staff lineup as last time, so you’ll be with Kristen again. That okay?”
“Oh. Sure.”
“You sound hesitant. Can you still make it? I don’t want you to get into trouble with your father,” he laughed.
Too late for that. Maybe it was best to put off telling Matt about the camp. “I do have some work to finish. But yes, I plan to come tomorrow. I’ll talk to you then, instead of later today. What time should I be there?”
Her Kind of Hero Page 19