Chaos nodded. “Oh well, I’m sure you’ll figure it out. It’s not like you’re in love with her. You can always leave her here when we head to Chicago, right?”
“Yeah.”
Fury laughed. “Right. Sure you will. You’ve got it bad for her.” He shook his head and looked pitiful. “You’re fuckin’ whipped, bro. She’s got your insides all fuckin’ twisted.”
“If you don’t shut up I’ll show you who’s fuckin’ whipped.” I didn’t want to hear it. Yeah, I deserved the teasing and I’d be the first one on board if it was one of them, but this was different. Fuck.
Joe was waiting for us outside the Bridgestone Arena with a huge smile on his face. It was nice to see someone fuckin’ happy. He showed us around the arena then took us to the suite we’d use for our dressing room and after-show party. It was pretty impressive, although not the Garden. Still, I wasn’t jaded enough to think it wasn’t fuckin’ awesome.
Terrence, our security, had been all over the place and knew how we’d go from the suite to the stage and back, and where the contest winners would be waiting to meet us for the party.
Backstage we waited for Devastating Reality, our new opening act, to finish up. I was fuckin’ impressed too. Their lead singer had a great voice, not as good as Chaos but definitely had staying power. Joe heard them play a few years ago and when he saw they hadn’t been signed yet he hooked them up. They’d be opening for us in Nashville and Chicago—a big break for them, hopefully they wouldn’t fuck it up. I’d heard their drummer liked to cause a lot of shit.
After their set Joe introduced us—Fitz, Ian, Paddy and CB. Paddy was the one Joe said to keep an eye on. It didn’t really fuckin’ matter to me as long as they performed and didn’t fuck up. We only had to deal with them for the next week or so.
Finally we were on stage. It was my fuckin’ happy place, actually we all agreed on that. We played to forget our past and to make a new future. We were the exceptions to the rule—proving foster care wasn’t always a terrible thing. The Sherman’s had saved us. Sure we each had our scars but they’d healed because of the family they gave us.
Chaos had his ‘Eleanor’ but I had my Flying V…same as my idol Jimi Hendrix. He played guitar like a God and I worshipped at his rock altar. The first time I held the guitar I swear he fuckin’ talked to me. I know it wasn’t true but I felt him, and knew it was a sign. Since then I hadn’t played any other guitar, my “V” was it.
Rage counted us in and as I played the opening notes of Blood Brothers, all the shit bugging me vanished. It was all about the music. We played through four songs from our first album and then added in a couple from the new one Chaos and Cyn were writing. Of course we did their ballad, Loving Sin, then we played through Hiding From Reality and Storm Clouds. I really liked the new shit they were writing. We’d been worried for nothing when Symmetry, our record company, demanded we use a songwriter. Cyn was great and now she was engaged to Chaos. No one saw that shit coming. It kind of figured he’d be the first to commit and she was fuckin’ good for him. I can’t remember ever seeing him this happy.
Chaos had us run through Storm Clouds three times before he was happy with it, and then it was a wrap. We were done until the show in about four hours. I needed to get with Joe about Sapphire, but first we had to do a radio interview. When you’re starting out you have no idea about all the little shit you have to do. It takes a lot of the fun out of it, but then I guess it’s why we get paid the big bucks. Each of us already had more money than we’d ever imagined.
The first thing we’d done after getting our new instruments was pay off the mortgage on the Sherman’s house. It was the least we could do, if not for them we’d be nothing. They were too old to foster anyone anymore and I knew Sally missed it. She still volunteered at the local homeless shelter every week. Jack volunteered too, but he was more a hands on type of guy so he helped build houses with the local Habitat for Humanity. Better fuckin’ role models we couldn’t have asked for, and they supported all of our decisions even when we went on the road to try to make it big.
The vibrating phone interrupted my train of thought. “Yeah?”
“It’s Cyn. How’s it going over there?”
“Great, we’re done. Chaos is talking shop with one of the guys from Devastating Reality. I’m sure he’ll call you soon.”
“I wasn’t checking up on him.”
“I know,” I said while laughing. Sure she was. She might be engaged to him but all the crap was still too new for her to forget it. “There aren’t even any women here except for Sweets and Candy.”
“Jerk.”
“Ha. I know how your mind works, by the way did you check on Sapphire?”
“Yeah, she’s fine. I checked on her about a half hour ago and she was sitting on the balcony listening to her iPod. Why? You worried about her?”
“Maybe.”
I heard her laughing. “You’ve got it bad.”
“No I don’t. Fuck you all. Just because I worry about her doesn’t mean anything. It’s normal to worry about another person.”
“It may be but it’s not on your standard plate of emotions.”
“How the hell would you know?” I needed to calm down. Chaos would have my fucking head if I went off on her. Why does it feel like a raw nerve when they tease me about her?
“Sorry, but I’m a girl. I notice more shit than you do. I’ve watched her too. She really likes you and not just in a hero worship type of way.”
“Bullshit. She’s a fuckin’ groupie. I don’t believe it. She’s only in it to be around the fame and get what she can out of me.”
“I don’t know. Maybe you need to find out more about her. She doesn’t seem like one of the regular skanks.”
I had to agree, she wasn’t a skank, not even close. I’d been with a few, and they never did anything but fuck and ask for shit. She never asked for anything. She was different, and being with her reminded me of the one girl in high school I liked, even if she was the complete opposite.
“We’ll see. I asked Joe to see what he could find out about her.”
“Cool. He’ll figure it out. In the meantime what are you going to do about her?”
“What do you mean?”
“Are you going to keep her with you or dump her like Chaos thinks you should?”
“Has he been talking about her?”
Silence on the other end of the line told me everything. Fuck. He needed to keep his fuckin’ nose out of my business.
“Maybe a little.”
I took a deep breath, it wasn’t Cyn’s fault, but Chaos and I were going to have a fuckin’ talk about minding his own fucking business. “Whatever. Thanks for checking on her. I’ll be back in a bit I need to do something first.”
“No problem. Sorry, Wrath.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about. It’s all good.”
Disconnecting the call I went to find Joe to see if he had an update.
11
Sapphire…
Shit everything was falling apart way too fast. How was I going to get around the whole car thing? Now they were all suspicious which would make it even harder for me to get the information I needed for the article.
I listened to the door slam and I winced. He was fucking pissed, and he didn’t know anything. I didn’t want to be anywhere near him when he found out the truth. I bet his head would explode, and whatever slim hope I’d been holding onto about him forgiving me was long gone now. No way would he overlook this so we could be together.
Mom had been right about one thing, okay maybe more than one, but it didn’t change anything. I’d made a commitment and I would finish what I’d started. I pulled out my phone and re-read Roy’s text from yesterday.
“I need to know what you’ve got so far. I want an outline ASAP. Need to figure out if it’s cover material.”
I thought about it, of course it was cover material. Raining Chaos was an amazing band and the guys had worked so hard to get where t
hey are now. I knew it even before I’d agreed to do this.
“I’ll work on the outline. When do you need it?”
I wondered how soon he’d get back to me. Faster would be better. I didn’t have a lot of time alone these days. While I waited, I pulled up the notes app on my iPhone and added info in my shorthand code. Even if Wrath found it, he’d never figure out what it said.
My phone buzzed and I checked. Looked like Roy was on top of things today.
“ASAP. What do you have so far? We want to promote on social media.”
What should I tell him? About Joe or the engagement or Cynda’s father being Preston Mitchell? He needed something, but what would have the least chance of blowing back on me? Face it T you’re screwed once they see it.
“Cyn & Chaos engaged. Cyn’s father is Preston Mitchell of The Hurricanes.”
“Good. Send more as soon as you have it.”
“Will do.”
There was a possibility they wouldn’t think it was me. There were a lot of people at the party when the announcement was made. Right? Ha. Who am I kidding? Wrath is already suspicious. Shit. I need to call Mom and figure out what to do about the car.
Checking the time I figured I still had at least a half hour before he would be back and I dialed Mom.
“Hello, sweetie. I’m so glad you called.”
“Hi, Mom.”
“What’s wrong? Are you okay? You’re not hurt are you?”
“No. Geesh. I’m fine. I’m twenty-three years old. Give me a break. You were already pregnant and following the Dead everywhere by the time you were my age.”
“Yes, but those were different times.”
“Not that different.” She was quiet but I could hear her sigh.
“Fine but something’s going on or you wouldn’t be calling.”
Okay, I had to give her that. She might be a hippie but she still had incredible mom-dar. “There’s an issue with the car and I don’t know what to do.”
“Alright, tell me and we’ll figure it out.”
“They towed the car somewhere and it was the starter. Maybe other things I don’t know. Wrath paid for it and they won’t tell me how much it was, but now they want to truck it back home and they want the address. If I tell them they’ll figure out who I am.”
“Hmmm. I have a brother somewhere. We lost track years ago but maybe I can find him and he’ll take it for now. I think he’s in the Chicago area somewhere. Would they bring it there?”
“Yeah, I’m sure but they’d never believe I’m from there since I hooked up with them in Philly.”
“True. You’ve dug yourself quite a hole, Daisy.”
“Yeah, I guess. Mom, stop calling me Daisy, it’s not my name.”
“It should have been. I don’t know what I was thinking, stupid nuns in the hospital.
“We’re off topic.”
“Yes, yes. Let me think about it. I still have a few of my friends around. Let me see who’s still on the East Coast and I’ll text you.”
“Really?”
“Yes, dear. Just because the Dead don’t tour like they used to and I’m old, doesn’t mean I don’t keep up with everyone.”
“I’m sorry. You’re really not that old.”
“Gee thanks darling. I love you for that, I think. I’ll text soon. You be careful okay? I worry about you.”
“Yes, Mom. I love you. Thank you.”
Wrath…
Joe was on his cell in the dressing room when I tracked him down. I grabbed a bottle of water. We’d decided no drinking before performances and so far we’d all kept to it. No one liked it much in the beginning, especially since every dressing room we went into was stocked with every fucking alcohol you could imagine, but we’d been good.
He saw me and signaled to wait. I turned on the TV and flipped the channels without paying much attention. Maybe Chaos was right. Maybe I should just leave her here with enough money to get back home. I didn’t owe her anything and life was a hell of a lot easier when I didn’t have to worry about her. We’d been on tour three weeks and already all of our lives had fuckin’ changed.
Flame was with Cynda’s friend Michelle, although she wasn’t on the road with us. Chaos and Cyn were engaged and now I fuckin’ had Sapphire. She was different, Michelle and Cyn weren’t groupies, hell, Michelle was a fucking kindergarten teacher. I couldn’t make a life with a groupie. I’d always wonder who she’d leave me for to fuck next. The next band, next rock star. Nope, not my idea of a fuckin’ lifetime commitment. Screw that shit.
“Wrath?”
“Huh? Sorry, Joe. I was thinking.”
“Yeah, I could tell. You okay, son?”
“Yeah, no problems here.”
Joe smiled. “Right. Well we have a small one, but I need to talk to all of you about it. We’ve got a leak. When the rest of the guys get here we’ll talk about it.”
“A leak?”
What the fuck. Was it Sapphire? Was she the leak? Hell, I didn’t even know what was leaked. She might not have been with us yet. I had a fuckin’ bad feeling about this. Leaks were never good, even if the info was good stuff.
Chaos, Flame, Fury, and Rage finally wandered in, followed by Candy and Sweets.
“Hey, guys, we need to have a chat.”
“What’s up Joe?” Chaos looked concerned.
“We have a leak.”
“What?”
I watched the storm clouds gather in Chaos’ eyes. He’s going to go fuckin’ ballistic. He was still pissed over the shit with Sweets, hell it almost cost him Cyn.
“What and where?”
“Twitter again, not sure where else. I got a call from Symmetry. They’re pissed I didn’t tell them you and Cynda got engaged before they read about it. They also weren’t happy they didn’t get to release the info about Cynda’s father first.”
Oh yeah, this wasn’t good. I braced myself for the fuckin’ storm coming.
“Who did it?”
“We don’t know yet, but there were plenty of people in the room when you proposed. Some of them were groupies, and Green Sky Rising and some of the winners from the radio station.”
“I thought we’d cleared everyone out first.”
“Not exactly. I wasn’t in charge then and I didn’t know what was going to happen remember?”
“Fuckin’ shit. What’s the Twitter account?”
“Rock Stars Revealed.”
“Sounds fuckin’ fake to me.”
“Yeah me too, but I’m not sure there’s anything I can do about it. What they put out there is true.”
I thought Chaos was going to put his fist through another wall, and I don’t think I was the only one who noticed. Joe put his hand on Chaos’ shoulder.
“You know this is all part of the fame, right? It’s better this than something horrific no one wants to get out. So we just have to make sure anything, and I mean anything at all we don’t want shared is not discussed with anyone but us and Cynda. Got it?”
We all nodded. This was going to make it even more difficult having Sapphire around. We’d all be wondering if she was the leak. It could have been her. She’d been there, but how would it help her?
“Okay, so from this point on we’re on information lock down. If you have anything to discuss we make sure we’re alone first.”
“I’d better not find out who leaked this. I’ll fuckin’ kill ‘em,” Chaos growled.
“No you won’t,” Joe responded. “We’ll find them, eventually, and you’ll do nothing at all.”
“Why not? You’re telling us anyone can just fucking invade our privacy?”
“Yes they can. You’re famous. Did you think things wouldn’t change for you? You all need learn to deal with it, and it’s only going to get worse—or better depending on how you look at it. Fame and fortune guarantees lack of anything remotely resembling privacy. It’s the life you’ll all be leading now, so you might as well get used to it.”
“You know, Joe’s right. I don�
�t like it any more than the rest of you, but it’s what we all worked for and now we’re living our dream. We have no right to fuckin’ complain about what goes along with it. There are too many bands out there that’ll never get as far as we have.”
Fury and Flame nodded. Rage raised an eyebrow and looked surprised. “Wow look at you, the fuckin’ voice of reason. When the fuck did you become reasonable?”
I flipped him off. “Since Chaos is freakin’ the fuck out over Cynda. Someone has to be.”
Chaos growled but didn’t say anything, he knew I was right. Cynda would be fine, she was tougher than he gave her credit for, and she’d already proven it.
“We need to make sure we’re careful who we talk around, and I know that means me too. I don’t know much about Sapphire so until we do no more band talk around her.”
They nodded and Joe agreed. If we wanted to maintain any privacy we needed to be careful.
12
Sapphire…
I didn’t realize how much I missed my mom until I heard her voice, even if she was always a little off. She smoked too damn much weed. I slipped my phone into my jeans and heard a sound behind me. Shit. I wonder how long he’d been there, and fuck him for sneaking up on me.
“How’s your mother?”
“She’s fine.” I didn’t turn around. I wasn’t sure if he was pissed and I didn’t know how I’d deal with it if he was. I still didn’t have a solution to the car issue, and now Roy was pushing me for more info.
“Glad to hear it. Sounds like she misses you.”
“Yeah. At least she says she does, most of the time she’s off in her own little world.”
“At least you have her.”
I heard the bitterness in his voice and I couldn’t stop myself from turning to face him. I didn’t know why he’d been in foster care, none of them had talked about it at all. I’d been hoping to find out for the article. “I’m sorry. It must be hard for you and all the guys. I know you all grew up in foster care.”
Vote Then Read: Volume I Page 163