by TJ Nichols
“Because you don’t want to fuck me?”
“Because I do, but I want more than one night.” Edra studied the pretty man who couldn’t seem to stop touching him. “Dragons, even lesser ones, mate for life. We’re careful about who we mate with for that reason.” He expected Jordan to pull away and freak out.
Jordan frowned. “For life? This isn’t just ‘take it slow before getting into bed.’”
“No. We could’ve fucked, and the lust would’ve been sated, and I could’ve moved on.”
“What if I wanted more?”
Edra shook his head. “Maybe a few times, but it would’ve never gone anywhere. I shouldn’t feel this way about you.”
“Because you only mate with lesser dragons?”
“Because humans don’t mate for life. This isn’t what you do.”
“People marry for life.”
“Not the same. The loss of a mate is physically painful. Consuming.” He couldn’t do that again. But he couldn’t walk away either. It would be easier if Jordan did. If he reeled away in disgust instead of watching him as though weighing his fate. “How many mythos have you dated… or slept with?”
Jordan reached for his beer but kept his gaze on Edra. “None. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to.”
“I look human, but I’m not,” Edra said softly.
“I know. I’m reminded every time you do that thing with your tongue.” Jordan stuck out his tongue and wiggled it around, and Edra laughed. This should be feeling weirder, or be more difficult. “And the way you ate the pizza.” For a moment Edra thought he was going to say something else, but he shook his head, sipped his beer, and sighed. “Do you want to come around on Friday?”
“Sure. I’ll bring dinner.”
“It’s fine. I’ll do dinner, but can you bring the Bliss?” He couldn’t look Edra in the eye as he asked. “I use because I’m tired of hooking up and having meaningless encounters.”
“But Bliss is a sweet lie that’s just as empty.”
Jordan lifted his head. “I know. But I want you, and that—”
“Is terrifying.” The edge of the cliff was crumbling, and Edra didn’t know if he’d be able to fly away in time. And if he did, he’d never know what he might find if he fell. He reached out a hand, and Jordan interlaced their fingers. Jordan’s skin was cold from holding the beer.
“Yes, exactly. I didn’t know where this was going.”
“And now?” Edra gave Jordan’s hand a tug, and Jordan moved toward him without hesitation. He moved gracefully—and without spilling his beer—to straddle Edra. He settled close, and the track pants didn’t hide anything. It was all Edra could do to not put his hand down the front and run his fingers over Jordan’s length. Jordan leaned forward, but didn’t attempt to kiss him… on the mouth, anyway.
“Now we go slow. There’s lots we can do without having sex.” He brushed his lips against Edra’s cheek. “Is that okay?”
“Uh-huh.” He tugged Jordan closer so their hips met, and he shuddered at the feel of Jordan’s dick pressed against his. Jordan rolled his hips. “But everything we do helps create the bond.”
“But it can be broken. You didn’t die when your mate did.”
He’d just wanted to. “We say for life, but it can be broken.” He lowered his gaze, not entirely sure why Jordan was even entertaining the idea. He sighed. “I don’t even know if it works anymore. Maybe that magic was lost. Even a non-dragon mate should start to feel something during the process.”
Jordan pressed closer. “You feel good. Tell me that there’s no spines or something I need to worry about.”
Edra couldn’t stop the laugh from bubbling up. “You should probably avoid werewolves if you’re worried about strange dicks. I’m a man… in this body.”
“And in the other?” Jordan drew back.
He was a dragon with a dragon’s dick, and that wasn’t the kind of thing a human would want. If he was with Jordan, he was going to have to get used to only having sex in his human body. He wasn’t the only one of his kind, but there weren’t many of them. “No spines, but the head is different.”
That caused Jordan to lift one fair eyebrow. “Different?”
“It doesn’t matter.” He didn’t want to be some mytho experiment so Jordan could walk on the other side of the road before he ran back to be with humans.
Jordan cupped Edra’s jaw. His touch was firm as he swept his thumb under Edra’s lower lip. “I want to know who you are—even the dragony parts. I don’t want to rush when even you aren’t sure what will happen.”
Edra touched Jordan’s mouth. “And I want to know the side you hide from everyone else.”
Jordan’s eyelashes fluttered down. “No one ever wants to see that.”
“I do. You can be my Elf.” He leaned in, hesitated, and then kissed Jordan on the cheek. His skin tasted of jasmine soap, beer, absinthe, and pepperoni.
“But I’m not mytho.”
And Edra wasn’t human. They weren’t supposed to be in the same world, let alone the same bed.
Chapter 19
JORDAN WANTED nothing more than to shed his clothes. The press of Edra’s dick against his was some kind of torture. He hadn’t dated for years, and though he could remember what it was like to wait, he was out of practice and used to quick fixes.
It would’ve been easier if it was just sex. The lust would’ve gotten out of his system. That Edra was interested enough to want more, to see if Jordan could be his mate, was, as he said, terrifying. He gazed down. Edra’s blue eyes were dark, and there was a small smile playing on his lips. Jordan wanted to kiss him, grind against him, and get off. He eased back a little because he didn’t want to tempt himself too much. “On Friday….”
“I’ll keep watch.”
“That’s all? What do you get?” Jordan would get a couple of hours of being Blissed out.
“To watch,” Edra said as though that were obvious. “Wear the red?”
Jordan glanced away. No one had ever asked for that. The last man he’d been with had sort of tolerated it, but they hadn’t lasted long after that secret came out of his drawer—a few months. Maybe it was better to wait. “Don’t tease.”
Edra traced up Jordan’s chest and brushed his fingertips along his collarbone. It was a nothing touch, but it was strangely intimate, like the time he tucked the strap away. How had they gone from not talking about things to this? To talking and admitting to wanting more? “I’m not. I like it.”
“It’s not all the time.” He didn’t want to have to dress up to be accepted, but it would be nice to be himself instead of always hiding.
“I like this too.” He slid his hand down the front of Jordan’s T-shirt and his track pants and almost brushed Jordan’s dick. “It’s like you have your own shifts.”
Did he? He’d never thought of changing his appearance as shifting, but then, he didn’t think about shifting at all. That was a mytho thing. “I’ll wear the red.” He leaned closer. “But I have other colors.”
“You can pick the color next time.” Edra smoothed his palm up Jordan’s thigh.
Jordan couldn’t think that far ahead. There shouldn’t be a next time. It should be one last use of Bliss. “It doesn’t seem fair that you only watch. We could—”
“No. Nothing while you’re on Bliss.”
“Why?”
“Because you’d agree to anything.”
Would he? “I shouldn’t have even asked.”
With all the trouble Bliss was causing at the moment, it was a dumb thing to do. Starting had been dumb, continuing had been laziness and stupidity. But he was already looking forward to Friday, and he wasn’t sure if it was the Bliss or seeing Edra again.
“It was given to you—via my care.”
Given by Darian, who was now dead, and Jordan was no closer to finding out what had happened. He had a videotape of a car passing a traffic camera at about the right time, but he couldn’t read the plates. Nothing more.
> The lust started to fade. When he glanced at Edra, he knew the moment had passed and Edra knew it too. Though it seemed that Edra got what he wanted when he wanted it, which was very appealing.
“I’m glad you came around.” Jordan needed to get up, put some distance between them and make it safe again. How could he date a mytho? Be mated to a mytho. He wasn’t even sure what that actually meant except that it was for life. He tried to imagine what his friends would say when they realized Edra wasn’t as human as he looked. They probably wouldn’t be happy for him, and what would Edra’s friends think? Humans weren’t popular with mythos either.
But he’d never forget the night at the temple. For a few hours, it hadn’t mattered what he was or what he looked like, just that he’d been there to share the grief, and he’d been part of something.
“We didn’t talk much work.”
That had been a flimsy excuse. “I shouldn’t talk about too much… active investigation.”
“If you need a hand with the mytho stuff….”
“I know your number.”
They should just have sex and be done, but when he looked at Edra, he couldn’t say that. He wanted more than another meaningless fuck. He liked the way Edra looked at him when they were alone—as though he were the only person in the universe who mattered.
While that wasn’t true, he liked the fantasy.
JORDAN SHOULD’VE been surprised when he was called out to the Presidio because there was a body, but he wasn’t. Slumped on the park bench was a guy with purple powder scattered over his clothes. Jordan didn’t need to be an analyst to know what it was.
“He was obviously in a fight earlier,” the coroner said.
The man’s lip was split, and there was what should’ve been the making of a black eye, but his heart hadn’t beat long enough for it to fully form.
“And because he’s covered in Bliss, I thought you’d want to have a look.”
Clearly his name was now synonymous with all things mytho. Behind his sunglasses he scowled. He’d woken up with a headache and a hunger that no food would sate. No amount of jacking off on his own was going to get thoughts of Edra out of his head, and that pissed him off in daylight. At night he was able to let reality slip away and pretend.
“Thanks for that.”
Bliss didn’t kill, yet now he had two bodies. The current mayor was going to have a field day with it. The murders were well timed. The election was in a week. But he couldn’t say that. He couldn’t point the finger, even though he wanted to.
“When did he die?”
“Guessing at the moment, but before midnight.”
While he’d been dry humping on the sofa and trying not to kiss a dragon, something had been going on. There was always something going on, and the cops couldn’t be everywhere.
The temple was nearby, but not close enough that their cameras could help. This was a blind spot and not far from where Darian was found. It was time to put up some extra surveillance.
“Do you know who he is?”
“Marcus Clark from his student ID.”
“San Francisco State?”
“Yeah. How’d you know?”
“Lucky guess.” And he’d put money down that Marcus was also pro-mytho. Someone was targeting them. Marcus had fought back while Bliss was poured down his throat. “Keep me updated.”
Jordan stomped across the grass. His cell buzzed, but he ignored the call until he got in the car. Edra. The last person he wanted to talk to right then. He’d call him back later, once he’d figured out what Edra could do.
The phone rang again.
Fuck me. He answered the call. “What?”
“Good morning, Kells.” Edra’s voice was as smooth and cool as steel. Jordan could almost hear the smile on Edra’s lips. He was such an asshole.
“It’s not good. I’m up to my neck in bodies.” And it wasn’t looking good for the satyrs.
“I know. I’ve got Howard’s latest story on my screen. I’ll send you a copy, but I have a question.”
“What is it?” Jordan snapped.
“I’m not the enemy. If you bite, you may not like how hard I bite back.” It was meant as a threat, but Jordan was so messed up at the moment that it was more of a promise.
Try me formed on his lips, but he didn’t say it.
“Sorry… there’s a lot going on.” And if he fucked up, the wrong people were going to be in trouble. This wasn’t just a political case. It was one that could change everything. While the pressure squeezed his ribs, he needed to breathe and not pick a fight with the one person who could help.
There was a moment of silence, and then Edra spoke. “The article says the students at San Francisco State are experimenting with mytho drugs to prove them harmless.”
“And clearly failing.”
“What if they were experimenting with Bliss?”
“Then they should be alive. You said Bliss doesn’t kill.” Two bodies would disagree, but both had shown signs of a struggle, as though they hadn’t wanted to take it. There had been more around the dead man’s mouth than Jordan had ever taken at once, but even that was only supposed to produce a prolonged rush.
“Bliss is supposed to be digested or sometimes inhaled, depending on the species of the user.”
“Get to the point.”
“My understanding is that humans don’t usually eat their drugs. You smoke them or inject them. Did the woman inject Bliss?”
Jordan stared out the windshield at the crime scene. They were preparing to move the body. “Why does that matter?”
“If it’s injected, the body can’t digest it. The heart rate and body temperature increase too quickly—”
“And never stops.” Jordan got out of the car. “Send me the article. I need to go.” He hung up and ran across the grass. “Does he have Bliss actually in his mouth?” Or was it just on his skin? “Did he eat it?”
The coroner looked at him like he was a freak, but he opened the man’s mouth. Nothing purple shimmered in there. “I can take swabs and look for trace and look in his stomach.”
“I need to know if he shot up.”
The coroner pulled up the man’s sleeves. There were no marks. “But it looks like he was struggling.”
He pulled down the man’s collar, and a trickle of blood marked his shirt. The puncture wound was messy. He’d still been fighting. “Not an OD, but murder.”
“Murder with Bliss?” the coroner asked.
“We’ll know when we get his tox screen.”
He needed to find the rest of the pro-mytho students and find out what the hell was going on. He also needed to haul Howard in and find out how he knew about the murder before the cops did.
Someone had leaked the story to smear the mythos and start a panic.
CASSIUS CAME to the station with Edra to look at photos of the Earth for Humans members. He looked rougher than Jordan felt, which was saying a lot, but Edra looked fine. If he got a hangover, it wasn’t anything like what humans experienced.
“I don’t know how much help I’ll be,” Cassius said.
“That’s okay. Just flick through the book. Take your time and see if anyone there has been hanging around the temple.” There were also members of the pro-mytho group in there. Along with a grief counselor, Jordan would be spending his evening talking to them.
He’d rather be topping up his hangover. He shouldn’t have had that extra beer after Edra left, and the lack of sleep hadn’t helped. No amount of aspirin could kill the headache that throbbed at the back of his skull.
“Have a seat.” Jordan pulled out a chair for Cassius.
“No.” The satyr’s ears flattened. Something was wrong.
“Okay. Take a look. I’m just going to step outside with Ed—Tendric.” Fuck. He’d almost screwed that up.
Cassius glanced between them but said nothing.
Jordan shut the door and watched as Cassius stared at the photos. He was not acting the way most satyrs did—cocky an
d confident in every situation. “What’s wrong with him?”
“He hurt his tail.” Edra didn’t even look at him.
“I can tell when you are lying.”
Edra turned his head slightly farther than a human should be able to. The effect was unnerving, and Jordan almost stepped back. “We police our own.”
“What happened to his tail?”
“He no longer has one.”
“Christ. I’m not sure I want to know what he did.”
“Good, because I wasn’t going to tell you.”
“If it was related to this case, you would.” The silence grew a little too big. “Wouldn’t you? We need to work together to solve this.”
“We are working together. Cassius is assisting. I’m assisting.” Edra returned his attention to the satyr. “What more do you want from us?”
The truth and transparency about what went on behind closed mytho doors. “Just to know that we’re on the same side.”
“I think we are… for the moment.”
“What does that mean?”
“That if you were to feel slighted, what then? I hesitate with good reason. I’m a knight. I have to protect my people.”
“By cutting off their tails.”
“By making sure they don’t harm themselves and others, and sometimes it’s a bitch of a job, but it’s what I vowed to do. We aren’t that different. You swore to protect and serve or something similar, but not everyone extends that to us.”
“You think if we went sour, I’d turn my back?”
“I don’t know.” Edra shook his head and glanced down. “And it kills me to be caught in that place where I don’t know where to tread.”
Jordan was so used to it being him who was the reason why things didn’t work out—his work schedule and his love of lingerie and makeup—that he wasn’t sure what to say. He couldn’t force anyone to trust him. “You could ruin me.”