“Then you won’t blame me for punching the sanctimonious bastard in the face.”
My eyes widened, and then I grinned. “You hit him?” I clapped Zak on the shoulder. “Thanks. You saved me a job.”
“He didn’t just hit him,” Chad interjected. “He knocked the fucker on his ass.”
My smile grew. “Good.”
“He got inside her head, Upton, and that’s why she’s at home right now instead of here with you. But she doesn’t know the truth.”
“What truth?”
Zak’s lips pinched together, and he tugged on his ear, his expression conflicted. And then he sighed heavily. “Look, what I’m about to share with you, I probably should have told my sister first, but…” He shrugged. “Marin was cheating on Belle.”
I jerked back in my chair as if I’d received an electric shock. “What did you say?”
Zak glanced at Chad, then returned his attention to me. “While I was in the hospital recovering from my injuries, a woman came to see me. She told me that she’d been seeing Marin for a few months and that he planned to break off his engagement to Belle but hadn’t figured out how to tell her he’d fallen in love with someone else. He didn’t want to hurt her, according to his lover.” Zak snorted. “I told her to get out and that if she breathed a word to Belle, I’d spend the rest of my life making sure hers was ruined. She informed me that hurting Belle wasn’t her intention at all, and she’d only told me in case, at some point in the future, I might think that Belle deserved to know. Now is that time.”
I narrowed my eyes. “And you never told Belle any of this?”
“No.”
“Jesus.” I swept a hand down my face and blew out a steady breath.
“I think you should talk to her,” Zak said. “Don’t let Wyatt’s nasty rhetoric get inside her head any more than it already has. She only told me today what happened on Monday, and only because I pressed her for answers. My sister is a thinker, and sometimes that’s a good thing, but often, it’s a bad thing. She disappears inside her mind and conjures up all sorts of shit that shouldn’t be there.”
I rubbed my fingertips over my lips, sparing Zak and Chad the odd glance while I pondered. “I’m sorry, Zak, but I can’t. Belle deserves to keep her memories of her fiancé intact, and if that means she gives up on us…”
I shifted my gaze, unwilling to let Zak see the emotion in my eyes. “Then there’s nothing I can do about that.” I blinked to clear my vision, then refocused on him. “And you’re not to tell her either.”
“Okay,” Zak said, but his tone didn’t convince me.
“I mean it, Zak,” I reiterated. “Those memories are precious, and she deserves to keep them.”
Zak put his chair into reverse, signaling his intention to leave. “It was good to see you, Upton. Take care of yourself.”
27
Belle
The trip to the animal shelter hadn’t helped a bit. I thought walking a few dogs and cuddling a puppy or two might distract me for a couple of hours, but, if anything, it had made matters worse. When I’d poured out the whole sorry tale to Ariadne, she’d sided with both Upton and Zak and told me, in no uncertain terms, that the human heart was a complex beast, with no two the same, and therefore, no one should expect us to follow a cookie-cutter blueprint in our response to terrible grief.
She had a point, but one I wasn’t quite ready to concede. Whenever I closed my eyes, Upton’s hurt and puzzled expression on Monday night swam into view, and my stomach cramped up. I wanted to give us a chance, but I didn’t know how to get back to him. It was as if I’d been taken out to sea in a boat, then tossed overboard and asked to swim back to shore. The harder I paddled, the farther away the shoreline got. I needed a catalyst, something that would propel me into action. Pride was an odd emotion. I loved Upton—yep, I’d finally, solidly, admitted that to myself—but I was scared to ask him to take me back in case he rejected me.
Stupid, right?
I trundled up our street, and as our house came into view, my gaze fell on Zak sitting on the front porch. As I approached, he motioned for me to join him.
“We need to talk,” he stated.
I groaned. “Zak, please, stop nagging me. You’re like a woodpecker drilling into a tree. You never stop.”
He grinned. “True. And you also know that the fastest way to shut me up is to park your backside, open your ears, shut your mouth, and listen.”
“I’m telling Mom,” I whined, a homage to our past when, as kids, if I picked on Zak, he’d threaten to rat me out.
He laughed. “Good luck, she’s out,”
I sat beside him and grasped the bottle of beer he passed to me from a cooler beside his chair. “It must be bad if you’re plying me with drink.”
Zak kept his lips pressed tight, and a twinge of anxiety pinched the soft lining of my gut. Something told me I wasn’t going to like what he had to say. I took a long drink, then swung the bottle by its neck and touched mine to Zak’s.
“Hit me with it, then.”
“I went to see Wyatt.”
“Zak!” I scolded. “You shouldn’t have done that.”
I wasn’t all that surprised. Despite the challenges he faced with his disability, and the fact he was two minutes younger than me, he’d always gone to bat in my defense. My earliest memories were of Zak pushing one of our neighbor’s kids to the ground because he pulled my pigtails as I was playing out in the street and made me cry. We were four at the time, and Zak had come barreling toward us, shoved both his palms into the boy’s chest, and splat! Down he’d gone. His mother had come to see ours that night, outraged. Mom had told her to look a little closer to home for the problem, and maybe she should deal with her son’s bullying behavior. Yeah, us Lakers stuck together.
Zak rubbed his forehead, and only then did I notice his grazed knuckles.
“What happened?”
He shrugged. “Not much. I took Chad with me.”
At the mention of Zak’s best friend, a powerhouse of a dude with a heart of gold, I flinched. “Please tell me Wyatt’s still alive.”
Zak threw back his head and laughed. “Yeah, he’s alive. If I had to guess I’d say a broken nose from where I punched him, and a possible busted up jaw and a cracked rib or two that he has Chad to thank for.”
I should feel bad that Wyatt had gotten hurt, but I didn’t. Not in the slightest.
“Still sticking up for your big sis, huh, Zak?” I teased.
He snorted. “Two minutes older doesn’t count.”
“I disagree.”
An ancient argument, but one that warmed me like an electric blanket on a cold winter’s day. I leaned over and kissed Zak’s cheek. He rubbed at the spot, then grinned.
“You shouldn’t get any more trouble from Wyatt, but if you do, you’d better tell me.”
I saluted. “Sir, yes, sir!”
He smiled faintly, then his face grew serious. “There’s something else I need to tell you. I wasn’t sure I’d ever need to have this conversation but I can’t, in all good conscience, sit by and allow you to destroy what you have with Upton.”
I sighed. “Zak, please.”
He held up his hand. “Hear me out, and when you have, please try not to hate me.”
A river of ice sped through my veins. There was nothing, nothing, that Zak could ever do that would make me hate him. He was the other half of me, and no matter what he did, I’d love him until my last breath.
“Zak, you’re scaring me.”
His chest puffed out as he sucked in a lungful of air, and he reached for my hand. My heart raced, and sweat prickled across the nape of my neck, appearing out of fear rather than the warmth from the sun. I braced myself.
“Marin was cheating on you. Before he died.”
It took a second or two for Zak’s words to break through to my brain. The wooden porch beneath my feet swayed. Are we having an earthquake? Everything went silent, even the birds stopped tweeting. At least they did f
or me. Time skidded to a halt. Zak’s lips were moving, but I couldn’t hear him. My entire body trembled, my fingers jerking inside Zak’s warm, solid hand.
“No,” I rasped, pulling away from Zak. “You’re lying.”
His face crumpled. “I’d never lie to you.”
Confusion propelled me to my feet. I turned my back and grabbed the hem of my shirt, scrunching it in my fist. It wasn’t true. It couldn’t be true. Marin had been one of the good guys, my childhood sweetheart, the only person outside of my close family unit I’d known with blinding clarity would never hurt me. I clamped a hand over my mouth, stuffing the impending cry deep inside of me.
“Belle?”
My throat tightened, and when I swallowed it hurt. My arms fell to my sides, limp and leaden, and my head felt too heavy for my neck. I let it drop. My eyes followed a trail of ants crawling across the porch, their purpose in life defined. Where was my purpose now? Everything I’d believed and trusted in was a lie.
“Belle.”
Zak’s tone sharpened, no doubt in a bid to get my attention. I held my hand up in the air.
“Give me a minute.”
I stumbled into the house and headed straight for my bedroom. Just in time as it turned out because the second I got there, my knees went from under me and I sank onto the bed. Zak’s revelation had opened a jagged wound in my chest, and I didn’t know how to stitch it back together.
The whirr from Zak’s wheelchair reached me, and seconds later, he appeared in the doorway, his expression wretched.
“I’m so sorry, Belle. I never wanted to hurt you, but I couldn’t stand idly by and allow Wyatt to paint his brother as some kind of saint and you the wicked witch, and worse, have you believe those things to be true.”
He came closer and extended his palm, allowing me the choice whether to take it or leave him hanging. I took the olive branch.
“How did you find out?”
He breathed in through his nose. “She came to see me at the hospital. The woman he’d been…” He trailed off. “Anyway, yeah, that’s what happened.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, confused. “But why did she do that? What did she hope to gain?”
“She said that one day the time may come when you should know the truth, that he loved her and was planning to break off his engagement to you.”
A surge of pain hit me squarely in the chest, so powerful, I doubled over, pressing a hand over my heart as if to hold it in. “It wasn’t just a fling?” I whispered. “He wanted to end our relationship?”
Zak nodded.
“Oh God.” I squeezed my eyes closed, hoping to hold in the tears. I failed.
“Belle.”
Zak came as close as his chair allowed and pulled me into his arms. I collapsed against him, drawing on his strength. He remained silent while I cried, occasionally rubbing my back or stroking my hair.
Eventually, I straightened and gave Zak a wan smile. “I bet I look a terrible sight.”
“Yeah, you do,” Zak agreed.
I laughed. I actually laughed, despite the shock of learning that my first love, my fiancé, my childhood sweetheart, had cheated on me. See, this was what I loved about my brother. He always managed to bring a smile to my face, even in the worst of times.
“You’re a jerk.” Always a favorite of mine when it came to Zak.
“Get your insults in while I’m feeling generous,” he said.
I laughed harder, and then I couldn’t seem to stop. Zak joined in. We must have laughed for a good long minute, and I felt a whole lot better afterward.
“So, what about Upton?” Zak asked, as always straight to the point.
“I don’t know, Zak.” I shrugged. “What does this change, really?”
“Are you kidding me?” he exclaimed. “Belle, open your eyes, and I don’t just mean to Marin’s infidelity. You were fifteen when you got together with him. A child. I’m not denigrating what the two of you had together, but it wouldn’t have lasted. Even if we hadn’t gotten caught up in that bomb and Marin wasn’t cheating on you, I’d have given it two years. If you dig deep and have an honest conversation with yourself, you will realize that what you feel for Upton is far more profound. It’s the kind of love most people search their entire lives for. It’s real, Belle.”
“What Marin and I had was real,” I insisted, but my voice wavered. Was it really? Or did Zak have a point that Marin and I drifted into a serious relationship, and Marin popping the question seemed like the logical next step?
“Not like you have with Upton,” Zak reiterated. “Remember, sis, I’ve seen you with both these guys, and I know the difference between first love and true love. And come on, even you must agree that the fifteen-year-old you is vastly different from the twenty-three-year-old you. I know I’m hugely different, and I’m not talking about my disability. I’m talking about maturity.”
I considered every word, carefully, slowly, taking my time to reflect and draw on my inner voice. To seek the truth in my heart. Zak’s revelation regarding Marin’s infidelity hurt. I couldn’t deny that. But now that the shock had receded, I had to answer the question of whether I was more upset that I’d wasted so much remorse on a man who’d lied to my face and allowed me to ramble on about dresses and venues and bridesmaids while he figured out how he could extricate himself from a situation of his own making.
Even though I wanted to rush back into Upton’s arms and tell him how sorry I was, and that I’d spend the rest of my life making it up to him, there remained, at the back of my mind, a niggle that he’d reject me. And he had every right to.
Still, there was only one true way to find out.
I rose from the bed and hugged Zak tightly.
“Thank you for telling me. That couldn’t have been easy.”
“It wasn’t, but it had to be done. Now, please, tell me you’ll speak to Upton.”
I grinned. “Where do you think I’m going?”
Zak grabbed my wrist. “Before you do, there’s one more thing. I went to see Upton today, after the altercation with Wyatt. You stubbornly refused to talk to him, and so I thought he might be the easier option to get you two back together. But he said no. Insisted you’d asked for space and he wanted to respect your wishes. And so I told him, about Marin. I’m sorry, sis. You deserved to be the first to know. I guess I hoped that if he knew, it might encourage him to make the first move. Instead, he ordered me not to ruin your memories of Marin which I, of course, ignored.”
Zak’s admission should have angered me, but everything my brother did came from a place of love, and this was no different. I leaned down and kissed his cheek.
“Love you, bro.”
28
Belle
My knees knocked together as I got off the bus and began the trek up the hillside to Upton’s home. Several times I had to wipe my palms on my jacket—such class—and my heart bounced around in my chest as if it’d come unhooked from the arteries keeping it in place. I’d spent the bus ride over here practicing my speech, and even to me, it sounded lame. I could only hope Upton forgave me for unceremoniously dumping him on the cruel words of a man who’d never liked me anyway. I was more pissed off with myself than with Wyatt for allowing him inside my head and potentially ruining my chance at true happiness.
Zak told me that Upton was aware of Marin’s affair. Zak’s original plan had been for Upton to tell me, but he’d resisted. Smart man. If he’d told me, I’d have accused him of either making shit up to force my hand or ruining my memories, when the real culprit of the latter was Marin. I wasn’t the kind of person to say he didn’t deserve my sorrow—after all, I had loved him, and he’d loved me, once—but I’d spent enough time mourning him. It was time to move on, thanks to my annoying brother who’d opened my eyes to the truth.
The sight of Upton’s imposing gates sent a fresh wave of dampness to my palms. At this rate, I’d have to toss my jacket in the trash. I stood there, my finger hovering over the buzzer, for at least t
hirty seconds. And then I remembered he had CCTV and the last thing I wanted was for him to see me standing here with my feet glued to the ground, unable to move. I could use the keypad to let myself in, but, in my opinion, that was overstepping the mark.
After taking three cleansing breaths, I rang the buzzer and waited. A few seconds later, Barbara’s voice came over the intercom.
“Hello, Belle.”
She sounded stiff and a bit cool. Not that I blamed her. Her loyalties lie with Upton, and no doubt she’d know we’d fallen out.
“Hey, Barbara. I’m here to see Upton. Is he in?”
“No, he’s taken Bandit out for a walk, but he’ll be back soon.”
“Can I wait inside?”
A pause, then, “I suppose so.”
The gates opened inward, and I walked through, unsure whether Upton’s absence was a good or a bad thing. If he’d been inside, at least he’d have had the time it took me to arrive at the front door to prepare. Now, he’d end up blindsided. Still, there wasn’t much I could do about that.
Barbara greeted me at the front door with a tight smile. She led me into the kitchen and, ever the perfect hostess, offered me a glass of iced tea which I refused. I was about to try to warm up the frosty atmosphere with an apology when the sound of the front door slamming drifted across the expansive hallway. My spine stiffened in anticipation, and I locked my gaze on the entrance to the kitchen. Bandit arrived first, his claws sliding on the tiled flooring. He bounded off the floor as if he had a trampoline beneath him and landed right in my arms, then proceeded to lick my face enthusiastically.
“Hey, little buddy.” I scratched behind his ears. “I’ve missed you.”
Upton’s footsteps grew closer, and when he appeared, I could tell he hadn’t been expecting me. He did a double take, his stare on the incredulous side.
“Belle. What are you doing here?”
Enchanted: A Billionaire Romance (The ROGUES Series Book 4) Page 18