Craving Control (Black Shamrocks MC Book 6)

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Craving Control (Black Shamrocks MC Book 6) Page 20

by Kylie Hillman


  “Why? Is it because he's fucking rich? Because of his famous last name? Because he treats you like a fucking piece of shit and you secretly get off on it?” he asks, peeling her fingers from his arm and stepping away from her. Fury that could rival mine from yesterday paints his face. It warms the dark recesses of my mind. The good guy is coming apart at the seams. “Or is it because I'm a fucking dumbass biker who you're too good for?”

  His anger is sublime, but it’s the heartbreak in his eyes that really gets me going.

  I can hear the anguish in his voice when he verbalises the last question.

  Seems even he knows that Maddi is worthy of someone better than him.

  Someone like me.

  “It's not like that,” she cries. “It's complicated—”

  He shouts back at her. “It wasn’t complicated when I was—”

  A hand grabs me by the collar of my shirt and a familiar asshole drags me down the hallway. I lash out with my fists, more upset at missing the details of Mik and Maddi’s argument than I am about being accosted by Benji.

  “What do you want?” I ask once he’s slammed me against the wall. “If you can’t tell, I’m quite busy.”

  “You’re fucking sick.”

  I smirk. “Well, yeah…”

  My droll admission throws him off balance. The fight leaves him, and he slaps my shoulders with his open palms, then steps away from me. Leaning against the wall at the opposite side of the hallway, he drags both his hands through his dark hair.

  “Please leave her alone,” Benji requests.

  “I can’t. I love her.”

  His despair infiltrates the air between us. His shoulders slump and he drags in a rough breath.

  “I know you’re only doing this to get back at me.”

  Standing tall, I close the distance between us and poke him in the chest. He narrows his eyes and balls his hands into fists. My body tenses while I wait for him to take a swing.

  “No,” I reply with a shake of my head. “I’m doing this because I want her. The fact it’s destroying you is just an enjoyable by-product.”

  Benji throws a punch. It narrowly misses me. Skipping out of reach, I wave a finger at him.

  “Now, now,” I caution. “What would Maddi say if she found out you’d hit me again.”

  It’s a bluff—I don’t think she’d care at the moment—but it works. He lowers his arms and starts to walk backward down the hallway.

  “I’m going to take you down,” he promises. “You will lose in the end. I’ll make sure of it.”

  Chuckling quietly, I shrug. “I’m sure you’ll try… and make an unholy mess of it like you do everything else.”

  “Fuck you.”

  “Nah,” I drawl, tilting my head to the side. “I prefer fucking your sister.”

  Cursing under his breath, he disappears deeper into the house, and I return to my previous position. Mik is currently tearing strips off Maddi while he heads for the door.

  “… so run along and enjoy your life with Prince fucking Charming,” he snaps.

  Maddi’s eyes water and she sways on the spot. It appears that whatever he’s said to her has robbed her off all willpower. He’s stripped her bare—stolen her pride and her only real chance of finding an ally that could test me.

  “I do love you. Please believe me. I just need time.”

  Her whispered words are filled with truth. Luckily for both of them, Mik is too far gone to hear her honesty.

  After a minute pause, he takes hold of the door knob and turns. I take the opportunity to announce my arrival, pushing the door open and grinning when it nearly hits him in the face.

  “Well, what do we have here?” I enquire, snapping my fingers at Maddi.

  She walks to my side straightaway. I smirk at her meek obedience while Mik shakes his head.

  “Not a thing, cockhead. Lainey and I were just saying goodbye.” He glares at me, then gets in my face. “I’ll give you one piece of free advice before I leave you two alone—”

  “And what would that be, biker scum?” My smirk morphs into a sneering challenge.

  He accepts without thinking. “If I hear one word about you hurting Lainey in any way, I’ll hunt you down and kill you. I don't give a fuck who your father is. He won't be able to save you.”

  Maddi draws in a sharp breath and shoots him a pleading look. I throw my head back and roar like it’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. "Seems to me that the only person hurting Lainey at the moment is you. Do you leave every girl you meet in tears, or is she special?”

  My barb is pointed, and it buries its sharp edges directly in his guilt. Deep down, he must know that he’s played this all wrong, yet I can see that he’s too prideful to backpedal. I expected more opposition from him—this cowardly reaction is denying me the fight I wanted.

  He’s in love, and it’s made him weak.

  Which is funny because I think it’s made me an even bigger monster. I have something to lose now, and I will defend it to the death.

  Mik stalks out of the room. I follow him as far as the door, closing it behind me once I’m certain he’s not coming back.

  “Now,” I muse, turning to regard Maddi as I lean my back against the wooden door. “I’ve been waiting all day to have you to myself.

  She backs up. I shake my head and she stops short.

  Opening my arms, I tilt my head to the side and beckon her into my embrace with my only eyes. Maddi walks forward and presses herself against me. I run a finger over the make-up covered bruises on her face, then lean down to kiss them.

  “I need you.”

  My statement makes Maddi stiffens. She’s scared and on the verge of denying me. I couldn’t care less how she’s feeling right now. It’s time she paid the price for her slip up.

  “You told him you love him?”

  “I-I, he, it was,” she stammers.

  “Shhhh.” I press two fingers on her lips. “I have a much better use for your mouth than grovelling.”

  Flipping the lock on the door, I press on her shoulders until she falls to her knees. Her gasp is gratifying—proof positive that she still feels every minute of last night in her aching body. I free my hardening cock, palming him, working him over before I press the head against the thin line created by her tightly pressed lips.

  “Open wide, angel.” Her horror at what I’m asking her to do is apparent. It’s not a deterrent. If anything, it makes her upcoming violation sweeter. “I won’t ask again.”

  Maddi parts her lips. I slide my dick between the plump pillows of flesh, taking it easy at first, then increasing my speed and depth once her jaw has relaxed a bit. Hitting the back of her throat, I use both hands to hold her head still when she tries to pull back. She gags. Tears stream down her face. Her nails dig into the skin of my thighs until she realises it’s futile and falls still.

  “Good girl.” I reward her submission with a pat on the head.

  Letting the back of my head rest against the door, I close my eyes and allow the sensations caused by her mouth covering my cock wash over me. My release is building. I shiver. It’s intense. I’m on the cusp, deciding whether to make her swallow my seed, when she sinks her teeth into my dick.

  “Fuck!” I yell.

  Maddi scrambles backward. I chase her down. Catching her by the back of her T-shirt, I wrench her to her feet and toss her against the wall. She bounces off. Landing on her feet like a lioness, she spins to face me. Her eyes are wild. Her body vibrates with her desire to hit me.

  Maddi wants a fight.

  I’d give her what she’s wants, except now is not the time nor the place. Her family is out the back, too close for comfort. This is the moment where Maddi learns not to challenge me in public.

  “I’d think twice before you head down this road,” I warn. “I can ruin your brother’s life with one swipe of my thumb. And, then poof, there goes his biggest dream and it will be all your fault.”

  She swallows. “What do you want me to d
o?”

  “I want you bent over the back of that chair.”

  Maddi closes her eyes. Her lips move like she’s silently praying. When she lifts her eyelids, I’m greeted by a different girl. Gone is the innocent spirit that drew me to her. In its place, there’s hard-edged acceptance. She’s ceded this fight.

  Once she’s draped her body over the tall back of the chair like I asked, I step behind her. Unbuttoning her pants, I tug them halfway down her thighs. Her panties are no match for my determined fingers when I rip them from her body. I run my cock over her folds then press into her warm body.

  Holding her hips, I move slowly within her. My beast wants to take her hard, but there’s a new voice in my head. This one reminds me of the promise I made last night, so I tamp down on my need to dominate and take Maddi as gently as I can.

  It takes me longer than usual to peak. My body isn’t used to slow and sensual lovemaking, however once I’ve adjusted, I find myself enjoying the change of pace.

  Maddi is stubborn, refusing to take the pleasure I’m offering when I rub her clit. Jamming my hands under her T-shirt, I flick her nipples with my thumbs before returning my attention to the sensitive bundle of nerves at the junction of her legs. Her thighs shake, tremors wracking her body, yet she doesn’t find her climax.

  In my head, I vow to make her come with me next time.

  “Yes,” I groan, losing my rhythm as I spasm inside her, climaxing hard. “You’re perfection. Everything I could ever need.”

  Once I’m done, I pull my dick free and tuck him back in my pants. Turning Maddi to face me, I discover that she’s crying in silence. Tears runs over her face. She does nothing to stem the flow. She simply accepts their presence without a word.

  It’s bewildering.

  I’m confused and devoid of an explanation.

  I was nice this time. I took care of her. I put her needs first.

  So, why does she look like I hurt her more just now than I did last night?

  TWENTY-TWO

  “Do you like it?” Maddi asks, gesturing at the bedroom she’s redecorated for the fourth time since we moved into the house. When I don’t answer immediately, she lays her hand on my face. “Talk to me… what’s wrong?”

  She is solicitous. Worried more about my reaction that she is about her own comfort. This is how it’s been for the past four months. Since the day after her birthday, Maddi has fallen into line. There’s barely been a blip on our horizon once I neutralised all outside influences, and when’s she messed up, she’s accepted my punishments with grace.

  Our life has been nearly perfect.

  I’ve barely had to mention the dirt I have on Benji and I’ve been working on making her giggle like she used to. I’ve missed that sound more than I should have—losing it is probably the only low point of the past few months.

  Now, that’s all about to change.

  “I don’t understand why we have to share a house with Benji?” I ask for what feels like the fiftieth time. “I could quite easily afford to buy us a house of our own. We could move and leave him to his own devices.”

  Maddi runs her hands under my shirt until they’re resting on my heart. My pulse quickens. I lean into her touch, resting my chin on the top of her head. She slides her hands around my waist and hugs me. The contentment I feel when I’m with her rushes through me. An adrenaline surge that somehow calms me. It’s a contradiction, but it seems to be working.

  “I know this is hard for you,” Maddi replies. “But this is where I lived with my mother and I want to continue to share it with you. Now the draft is in full swing, Benji will barely be here. You know, he might even end up moving interstate if he’s selected by one of the other teams. Worst case scenario, we end up spending more time in our bedroom when he’s home. Please, just give me time to see if this work?”

  Seeming satisfied with the arguments she’s present, she pulls back.

  Standing on her tip toes, she kisses me. “Please.”

  I look down at her, the muscle in my jaw working as I grit my teeth.

  Maddi kisses me again. “Please.”

  I swallow the lump her touch brings to my throat, fighting hard to remain aloof.

  Sometimes, I have to deny her my affections just to prove to myself that she’s not playing me. Occasionally, it feels like Maddi has discovered all the right buttons to press, so she can control me like a real-life Sim.

  Case in point, our new living arrangements.

  I’m still uncertain how we went from Maddi taking a year off university to stay home with me, to me agreeing that we would live in the old O’Brien house in the city and I would travel back and forth whenever my father needed me on the farm, to where we are now—having her twin move in with us last week.

  Biting her bottom lip, she blinks fast, dazzling me with her eyes and engulfing me with her delicious scent. My brain doesn’t work properly when she’s this close to me—most of the time, it’s only once we’re apart that I discover I’ve agreed to something I shouldn’t have.

  “You give me so much,” she purrs. “I want to repay the favour, even if it’s only tiny compared to what you do.”

  Ding. Ding. Ding. We have one giant sucker down. Clean up in aisle four. My demon groans while the second voice in my head claps with excitement

  “I want all of you,” I murmur, finally giving in and bending down to take her mouth with mine. “Unfortunately, I have a meeting with my father. I hate leaving you alone, but he made it clear that this is a business matter.”

  She smiles sweetly. “That’s okay. I have some errands to run anyhow.”

  Instantly my hackles are raised. I pull her arms from my waist and frog march her back toward the wall. Maddi hates being trapped which means it’s my number one go-to whenever she steps out of line.

  Like now—slyly dropping her need to run errands alone into our conversation.

  You would think she’s have learned her lesson yesterday. I wasn’t particularly kind in the way I dealt with her when she sprung her surprise about going out to dinner with her brother tonight.

  “I don’t recall you asking permission to go anywhere without me? I thought we agreed that you would run all future plans by me first.”

  “I’ll be quick,” Maddi promises, quickly recognising her misstep. “I only want to grab some groceries and put my resume in at a couple of places.”

  Wedging my knee between her legs, I lift her up the wall until we’re eye to eye. “I told you. I’ll take care of you. You don’t need a job.”

  The protest I expect to come isn’t mounted. Instead, Maddi wraps her arms around my neck and relaxes against me. A flicker of warning catches fire at the back of my neck. It burns. My hair stands on end and an electric shock ripples over my skin.

  Where is her fear?

  Why is she embracing the monster?

  Are my suspicions founded? Is she manipulating me?

  Thoughts tumble around my brain, splattering against my skull like an unboiled egg that’s been dropped on a hot sidewalk. Mistrust invades me. It poisons my mind and forces me to look at Maddi differently.

  I place her back on her feet and put some space between us. She stays where I left her. My gaze searches her form for an answer. I discover nothing. Rather than finding peace, I’m left feeling further adrift when every clue I discover contradicts itself with the next.

  She meets my appraisal with cool resolve, all the while worriedly wringing her hands.

  Her expression is placid, yet her lips are pressed together.

  Her posture is submissive, her stance unguarded, except her feet are facing the exit instead of me.

  “You can’t fool me,” I state, menacingly.

  “I’m not trying to.”

  Maddi’s response can be taken two ways.

  Has she truly yielded to me, or is she playing me like a violin?

  Beat the truth from her, my monster demands.

  Treat her with kindness and she’ll be honest, the second voi
ce advises.

  It’s always easier to give into my baser instincts. Pushing the second voice away, I allow my demon to guide me.

  Seizing hold of Maddi by the front of her shirt, I tear it from her body and throw her to the floor. She lets out a startled cry before she rolls onto her back and crawls backward along the floor to get away from me.

  “Stop.”

  Her reluctance flickers across her face, but she obeys. Her shoulders heave, lifting up and down as she breathes hard. Her tits jiggle in her bra, the tattered remains of her shirt hanging from her shoulders, and the skirt that I demand she wears has ridden up around her hips. The triangle of white silk at the apex of her thighs calls to me.

  Maddi is exposed. Ripe and ready to reveal everything she’s hiding.

  I grab her ankle and drag her back to me. Taking hold of her throat I toss her on our bed and launch myself at her. This will be quick. It will be mean. It will hurt. My meeting with my father gives me little time to dally; however I can’t bring myself to leave before I’ve satisfied my doubts.

  “Brendan, please,” Maddi begs. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “It’s too late for apologies.” Unclasping her bra, I strip her clothes from her body and straddle her waist. “It’s time to tell the truth.”

  Confusion clouds her face. She draws her eyebrows together, the vertical frown line telegraphing her concern about what’s to come. I grit my teeth, refusing to give into her emotional terrorism.

  She can worry all she likes.

  I’m not going to stop looking for answers.

  “Why aren’t you scared of me anymore?” I answer.

  A sharp inhale is her immediate response. Her eyes widen, and I watch her struggle to form the right words.

  I slap her chest. She bites back her scream and tries to curl into a ball. It’s useless. She can’t move from her back while I’m on top of her.

  She is at my mercy.

  Exactly like she should be.

  “Don’t lie,” I snarl. “Say what you truly think.”

  She hesitates. I slap her again. Her body bounces from the impact, swaying on the mattress. Still remains silent. The leash I have on my control is stretched tight. It’s about to snap.

 

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