“I'm in PR, this is my dirty work, not his. He gave the order, and I'm the one to make it happen. This is what I do, it's not hard to understand.”
“How come I've never seen you in the office before?”
“Probably because you never paid attention.”
“You've been there when I was? You're sure?”
Nodding, her eyes open wide as saucers. “Yeah, more than once too.”
The look on her face stabs me in the chest. I feel like a complete jerk for not noticing her, but to have not seen her on multiple occasions, well that just makes me a fucking asshole.
How did I miss this girl? It doesn't make sense.
Reviewing my memories, I'm trying like hell to find one single image of this girl in my brain. But I can't. Either she hid from me every time before, or I really am inside my own head more often than I think.
“Why don't I remember you? I feel like I'd remember you if I had seen you. You're too beautiful to forget.” The corner of my lip twitches with a soft smile.
“What are you doing right now?” she asks, her fingers playing with the edge of the paper.
“I'm trying to figure out where you were hiding in the office. Because I never saw you there, I know I'd remember you if I had, there's no doubt in my mind.”
“Maybe you were occupied with other women?”
“Not a chance in hell. I haven't had an actual girlfriend in almost three years. At least not a real one anyway. All I've had are money hungry leaches, or one night stands. The one night stands are my preferred choice.”
“I'm not surprised. Is it easier to get them out of your bed in the morning?”
Shaking my head no, I shrug a shoulder. “Not at all, it's because life gets in the way. I've had my heart broken before, don't get me wrong, I know what that feels like. If I can't give someone what they want, why put them through it at all?”
“Really? You've had your heart broken?” Tilting her head, her jaw hangs open. “Wow, you're just on fire tonight. I have to give you credit though, you're quick, Phade, you have an answer for everything.”
“I'm not messing with you, I'm serious. I wasn't always this person, Sylvia, there was a time where I had absolutely nothing but the shirt on my back, and no one knew my name.”
“You're too full of yourself to have come from nothing. Someone like you can't go a day without being noticed in some small way.”
Sitting back, the waiter returns, setting down our drinks. Holding my drink in my hand, I can't bring myself to sip it. I'm suddenly frozen, mesmerized as Sylvia wraps her lips around the cup and sucks down a long sip of her tea.
My cock jerks, thickening with need, ready to feel her lips as they suck my length and make the hair at the base of my dick wet. Biting my lip, I lower my lids and whisper.
“Why don't we forget this shit and actually have some fun. There's a really nice bathroom here, clean too. Maybe we—”
“Not a chance in hell,” she responds instantly, cutting me off. “That was a fluke.”
“Why? We had fun the other night, didn't we?”
“I'm not saying it wasn't fun, but I can't disappoint Daniel. Not again.”
Again? How could this girl ever disappoint anyone? Let alone a man that's family?
“What do you mean again? I doubt you've ever let him down.”
Pulling her head back, Sylvia's eyes grow as she flicks them up to mine. “You have no idea what I've dealt with. He's my step-dad, he's been there since I was really little. I want him to be proud of me.”
“How long have you been doing PR?”
“Three years.”
“Are you good at it?”
“I wouldn't be here if I wasn't.” She says it proudly, knowing her own worth in that very second. I can hear the confidence in her voice and see it on her face.
“And that's not enough to make him proud of you? Come on, that's bullshit.”
Twirling the straw in her glass of water, Sylvia is just blankly staring into the liquid. “I'd rather not talk about this. We need to focus on us.”
“Us,” I say, my voice low and smooth. “I like the way that sounds when you say it.” Lifting my chair, I start to scoot it closer to her. “Say it again. Say us.”
“What are you doing?”
“Working on us, just like you said.” Resting my hands on the table, I give her a wink.
“That isn't what I meant, Phade.” Shaking her head, she scrunches her nose. “I meant we should go over our back story so we're both on the same page.”
“It doesn't need to be this difficult, Sylvia. Why don't we spend some real time together, actually learn some shit about each other? Why fake everything?”
“So you just want to sit and talk?” She stares at me like I'm insane, her expression bewildered by my suggestion.
“Is that so crazy?”
“It. . . It shouldn't be. . .” Her voice drops as she angles her head. “But, Phade, this is business, it needs to stay business.”
“Ask me something.”
“What?”
“Ask me something, ask me anything.” Holding out my arms, I try to show her that I'm an open book. “Screw that binder you brought, we don't need instructions. I'm right here, ask me anything you want.”
She stares at me, her eyes dancing around my face, her lips pursed as her nails brush back and forth across the side of her glass. “This isn't a game, you do realize that, right?”
“Look, I get what you're doing, but we don't have to do it Daniel's way—”
“This isn't his way, it's mine.” She's short with me as her brows dip in hard. “I have a way I like to do things, I like order, I like lists and goals. It gives everything a start and finish.”
“You can't tell me you enjoy living this way? With written rules for everyday life. Not everything can be planned and dissected. Life doesn't come with instructions, this shouldn't either.” Nudging my head at her binder, I flip my fingers in its direction.
“I don't like taking risks.”
Smirking, I shift my body in her direction, putting us closer. “You took a risk with me the other night,” I say, bouncing my brows. “So, maybe you take another risk with me. Let me take you on the ride of your life.”
Giggling, she dips her head, nibbling on the end of her straw. “Does that usually work for you? Cheap lines and alcohol, maybe a nice little dinner like this, and girls just let you dive into their panties?”
“I don't know,” I say, licking my lips as I trace her body with my eyes. “What got you to let me in yours?”
“That was a freak thing, I told you that already. I don't usually do stuff like that.”
“You don't ever just live in the moment? That was the only time that's ever happened?” Laughing out loud, I can't stop myself from grinning. “Look, I wasn't lying when I told you I haven't had many girlfriends, but if you think I'm stupid, you're dead wrong. You can't label me as a dumb muscle-head, with no clue about what I'm doing, and act like you're some innocent princess. The odds of that being your first time ever jumping into bed with someone for a one nightstand has to be a billion to one. You're like a freaking unicorn.”
“I'm not a virgin obviously, but I'm not a slut.”
“I never said you were a slut, and I don't think living life makes you a slut.” Softening my eyes, I move my hand to her shoulder. Her skin is hot to the touch, almost on fire, and I swear she jumps a little in surprise.
I'm just not sure if it's because of the touch, or if it's because my fingers are cold and her skin is burning.
Hanging her head, Sylvia fiddles with her fingers in her lap. “It's just not easy being in Daniel's shadow. He wants things a certain way, and I just can't seem to ever get them perfect. This is my chance to prove myself. I don't want to fuck it up.”
I can hear the music coming out of the speakers. It's an orchestra of sound, with violins and cellos, beautiful strings and high pitched winds.
“Come on,” I say, standing up and
holding out my hand.
“What are you doing?”
“We're going to dance.”
“No we're not,” she says bluntly as she crosses her arms and thins her lips.
“Yes we are. Don't make me pick you up, just take my hand.”
“But there's no dance floor, and no one else is dancing.” Her eyes move around the room quickly, circling until they come back to me. “We're not doing this.”
“We are.” I'm stern when I say it, not giving in. “I don't care what everyone else is doing, I don't live for everyone else, I live for myself, and you should too.”
Reaching down, I wrap my fingers around her wrist and tug her softly. “Phade, I don't want to dance, that's not why we're here.”
“If I remember correctly, I asked you out to dinner, not the other way around. So. . .” Drawing out the last word, I tilt my head. “You owe me this dance.” Veering her stare, she's peering up at me, her expression slack. But I see the corner of her lip as it twitches, like she wants to smile and is refusing to. “Risk is all about the person who takes it. Take the risk, Sylvia.”
“Fine, but only for one song, I don't want the entire restaurant staring at us.”
“It's too late for that, everyone's been staring at you since we walked in, you're too damn sexy to ignore.” Taking her hand, I help her from her seat and braid our fingers together.
I walk us out a few feet away from our table and turn to face her. Sylvia looks terrified, like she's being put on trial for murder.
“Relax,” I say, rubbing the outside of her arms. Taking her arms, I lift them around my neck and wrap my arms around her waist.
“But everyone is staring at us.”
“So what, who cares about them, let them stare.” I start moving my feet, then my hips. Sylvia is moving even slower, her eyes darting all around the other diners, watching them watch her. Gripping her chin with my fingers, I turn her face back to mine. “Don't worry about them, just live in the moment. Be right here, right now with me.”
Letting out a slow breath, she nods nervously. “I'm just not used to this spontaneous stuff.”
“You have to learn to let go,” I whisper softly in her ear. The squeak of a chair comes over my shoulder, then another and another. Circling around, I can see an older couple is now dancing next to their table, and so is a couple against the far side of the restaurant. “See, look, you inspired others.”
Sylvia twists to look over her shoulder and smiles. “That wasn't me, that was you.”
“It takes two to tango, isn't that the saying?” Pressing my palm firmly against her lower back, I grab her hand and dip her. “What would Daniel say now?” Swooping her around, I lift her back up, pulling her in close.
Our bodies are touching, I can feel her tits with each breath she takes. Her nipples are hard, teasing me as they scrape my chest over and over. Sylvia is breathing heavily, her eyes set on mine, smile broad.
More and more people around us start to dance, but they're all a blur in my eyes. All I can see is Sylvia, with her gorgeous eyes and striking body. My hands slip down her back, moving over her ass.
She doesn't refuse me, taking a small step in. “Thank you,” she whispers against my cheek as we slow dance. We're moving in tandem, our feet and hips rocking and stepping to the beat.
“You don't need to thank me.”
“Yes I do,” she says quickly, pulling her face back so she can look into my eyes. “I don't get to do this. Daniel has a set of expectations for me, and they've been there since I was little.”
“Expectations are fine, that's normal, but everyone deserves to find themselves in one way or another.”
“You don't understand, Phade. I was a wild kid, it was bad.”
“Get out of here.”
“Seriously. My birth father left my mother when I was young because I was so terrible. Daniel told me how terrible I was, he made sure that I never acted that way again so he wouldn't want to run off too. Daniel set the rules for me, he gave me what I needed to succeed in life.”
“He didn't do that. You succeeded because you wanted to. Daniel didn't do that for you.”
“Yes he did, you don't know what it was like for everyone when I was a kid. My father actually left because of me when I was three.”
Holding her shoulders, I stop us so we're not moving. “Sylvia, your father didn't leave because of you.”
“Daniel said—”
“Daniel said,” I bark, cutting her off. “Who cares what he said, listen to yourself. You were three years old, there's no way you had anything to do with your real father taking off. Daniel is an asshole. Daniel will make you believe what he wants, just so he can get what he wants.”
“That's not true, you don't know what you're talking about.”
“Sylvia, come on, you can't be that gullible. Daniel doesn't see how incredible you are, he only sees what you can do for him. The truth is he's an asshole for telling you it's your fault your father left. It's never the child's fault—never.”
Taking a step back, she folds her arms across her chest and frowns. “You don't know shit about my life, Phade. Daniel has been the only father figure I've had, he's the only one that's pushed me and helped me. Yes, sometimes he's a bit much, but most parents are.”
“No, not like that. Parents don't tell their kids that another parent left because of them. That's cruel, Syl, you can't see it?”
“You know what,” she snaps, throwing up her arms. “I knew this was a bad idea.” Her brows drop, her mouth curls into an angry frown. “You don't know what the hell you're talking about. Daniel has been there for me, and he's been there for my mom. You have no right to judge him this way.”
“I'm not trying to upset you, but you can't let him treat you this way. You deserve more from life than this.”
“Did you ever think that this is what I want?”
“Syl—”
Holding up her hand, her jaw clenches as she speaks. “Don't, I'm not really looking for an answer. I'm done.” Her arms go limp as she whips her body around and storms off.
I stand dumbfounded for a moment, just letting it all sink in. I never meant to hurt her feelings or upset her, but I couldn't let her go on thinking that it's all right for an adult to tell a child that someone left because of them.
Dropping down into my seat, I let out a sigh. This isn't what I wanted for tonight. I had plans to take her home with me, to give her a night she'd always remember.
Picking up my head, I notice the binder still on the table. She left behind all her hard work, her imaginary life that she created for us.
Damnit. Why the hell am I doing this to myself?
7
Sylvia
Clutching my temples, I drop my head onto my desk and groan.
Why did I go out with him last night?
It was a dumb decision to go. I should have stayed in, watched a movie, finished a bottle of wine, and passed out on the couch. Instead I became subject to his ridicule, and narrow minded thoughts.
Ugh, I'm such an idiot.
Turning my face toward the window, the sun shines on my cheek, warming it up. Any other day I would be smiling, enjoying the way it streams in and makes rainbows off the crystal paperweight on my desk, but not today. Today my head is killing me, and I've been staring at the computer screen since six in the morning trying to redo everything I lost.
All the work I put into this engagement story, and I leave it on the damn table because Phade fucked with my emotions and pissed me off. I wish he would have just left it alone, keeping his opinion to himself.
But that's not who he is, and you know this.
Why are you surprised?
Phade's one of those guys that likes to hear themselves talk. I've already seen it with his interviews, and the articles in Sports Today and Pro Glove. He doesn't know when to shut up.
Now, I'm starting over from scratch, rebuilding the most important task I've ever been given. My step-father's going to base
his next decision, and where I stand with this company, on this. I can't screw it up.
Closing my eyes, I let the sun soak into my skin and just breathe. I got this.
“Whatcha got there?” Claudia's voice rains down on me from over my shoulder, her face almost against my ear.
Throwing my body upright, she jumps back with a light yelp. Immediately, I click my computer screen off and turn to face her. “Nothing, it's nothing, just trying to organize some stuff.”
I feel weird about this whole thing and how she'll react to it. None of it's real, but inside I feel like it's going to hurt her feelings. I've seen how she looks at him, like a horny schoolgirl, ready to drop onto her back if he looks at her just right.
Her eyes get all googly, her fingers get twitchy, grabbing at thin locks of her hair and sliding them between the pads of her fingers. And the giggle, her damn giggle goes from normal to a high pitched cackle.
Maybe she should be the one doing this. . . The thought flickers to life for a second, then quickly dies out. This is my job, given specifically to me, by the man who has guided me my entire life.
I can do this. It's just for show.
A flash of Phade bending me over pops into my head, causing my heart to flutter. I can't escape that night. It's always there. It's in my chest, in my muscles, in my belly, and between my legs, like a shadow I can physically touch and smell and see.
Leaning back against the partition, Claudia bounces her hands in the air. “Okay, okay, I'm just asking.” Sighing, she crosses her arms and forces a small smile. “It's just you've been super weird lately, Syl. Always sneaking around, closing down your computer, or bear hugging a binder. What are you working on, what's Daniel got you doing?”
Looking up, Claude's eyes are wide as she plucks at her lip with a curious smirk on her face. With pin straight hair and square bangs, Claudia looks exactly like you might expect a girl from New York to look.
She's tall and lean, almost too lean. She always dresses to the nines, wearing some fashion designer I've never heard of, and could never afford. Her father is some big wig lawyer who still funds his little girl monthly.
Big Bad Boys: A Romance Collection Page 30