by Jack Ray
You confronted those feelings
Now I’m nothing to you
Like I always was or will be
But tell me this
How long do you expect to go
Before telling him the truth.
A Song To Show Me
Every song I hear reminds me of you
How you’d sing ever so beautifully
This music we shared
You loved what I loved
And now the radio is full of your voice
So on my knees I pray to God for silence.
This Bouquet, You Never Received
I hate that I know you
All of you
The superficial
The intimate
Damn near everything
I hate that you threw it all away
For no reason at all…
Untitled V
The miles chewed you up
And spat you out.
Missing Persons
A picture of us from the past
Caused me so much hurt
Not because I miss you
Not because I love you
Not because we seemed so happy
No
Because the girl in the picture
She was almost unrecognized
She passed away what seems like
A lifetime ago.
Drowning Demons
The rain calls out your name
With every single drop
The sky is crying for you, you know
The Earth knows what She lost.
I’ve Waited Here For You
This world without you
It seems so meaningless
Eyes frosted with bloodied tears
Blinds me from moving on
Seeing only this moment
Forever living this life without you.
It’s called Everlong…
Untitled VI
And how quickly
It withers
Away…
Cookie Dough
And how you play it off
Like you never even met me
How we never happened
As if I was never a part of your life
When it was me in the spotlight
That pains me the most
That you’re lying to yourself
To your friends
To your family
And you’re lying to me
The one you used to call your best friend
Your closeted lover
The one who’d do anything for you
And you might try to erase me
Forget me
Or whatever the hell you do
To get past the thought of me
But I’ll never forget you
Especially how you treated me
In the end.
Chocolate And Strawberry Please
You mean a lot to me
You mean a lot to me too
I care about you
I care about you too
I miss you so much
I miss you so much too
I love you.
You mean a lot to me
I know
I care about you too
I know
I miss you so much
Yeah
I love you
I know.
You mean the world to me
I care about you so much
I can’t wait to see you
You know I love you
You know I never did.
And Ryo Finally Reveals Himself
I want you back so bad
So bad, you can’t even imagine that
And you don’t even think about us
What I’d do for you
How much I loved you
You’ve thrown away our past
Full of happiness
And there’s nothing you want to do to fix this
I can’t understand
Begin to imagine why
With you everything seemed so perfect
So tell me why you lied
This heartache stings
I T’ S K I L L E D M E
I loved you forever
But you just let me die
And die
And die
So I no longer sleep
I stay up, tears flooding my floor
Tears of a better life
Memories so beautiful in shape
You poisoned me with loss
Left untreated and alone
I can’t quite see it
How you got so cold.
Still Watching?
He will never love you as much as I have
And I would rather die
Knowing that as fact
Than continue living in this lie.
Untitled VII
You became the one thing
You swore to never become
A manipulator
A liar
A fake
A cheat
But more importantly
My traitor.
The Tragedy Of Secret Lovers
I guess it’s poetic
Because I know how he must have felt
When you went from him to me
In a matter of seconds
I know…
You did the same thing to me
You broke my heart and moved on to a new victim
So yeah I know how he must have felt
In fact
I know how he feels to this day
Because I still think of you every now and then
I’m sure he does too
But you
No
You don’t remember at all do you?
You wipe your memory clean
Just to do it all over again
So if you’re anything
Like I know you are,
I pray for your new host
And certainly the one that follows.
In Your Room // Braces
Waking up to your girl
Who is no longer interested in you
Prompted by nothing
No trouble
No fights
Has its own suspicions attached
And even in my darkest hours
I told you we could work it out,
I don’t want to try again right now…
Or anytime soon.
The Skylift, That’s My Favorite
Like air you are free
Leaving my body behind
Slipped away; breathless.
Christmas Lights In The Park
And I guess you were just as bad
As those ex’s you talked about
I learned that the hard way when I realized
I couldn’t trust you in the slightest.
Obsession // Self-harm
Rain falls over head
Reminding me not to leave my bed
And everyday I wake to pain
Forever aching since you came.
Half Shell
I can’t stand to see myself
Back at me, a failure
I failed to keep you happy
I failed to keep you here
And when you stare at yourself long enough
You know you’re different
You’re changed
Empty
And there’s nothing you can do to fill that
That hole in your heart
It’s as if I’m half the man I used to be
And my other half has just walked away
So I continue to stare at this mirror
Begging to be released from this
Begging to be dead.
I Never Felt It Back
You made me believe it was so real
When really,
I was never anything more
Than convenience to you.
They Hurt You The Most // Pretty Good Lot
I left you before
Back then
And y
ou called out my name again
You were broken
And my heart still beat for you
So I came back
I healed your aching heart
I sewed up your wounds
But you payed me back with abuse
You tore my heart out
You shattered me to dust
You were merciless
And I know that you have no intentions
Of resurrecting me
The way I did to you.
Good Morning Beautiful
How hard it is
Waking up in a bed without you
While you spend your nights with him.
PTC Paper
You’re not wide awake at night
Thinking of reaching out to me
With tears rolling down your cheeks
No
And that’s the reason I’m wide awake at night
Reaching for the blade
Allowing these drops of red to slide down my bed
Effortlessly
Because I know you
I know you would never try for me
You don’t even try for yourself.
Big Hearts // Slave Away
Seeing nothing but the good in someone
Who never saw a damn thing in you
Is the worst.
They Already Think We Are
You were my number one
My partner
And we spent every second
Of every goddamn day together
So how the fuck am I supposed to go on
Without you.
The Bill
How used
How manipulated
Letting me in to strike at the heart of another
Sacrificing my life
For the sake of your own
And I believed it too
Thought we were real
And I loved you so so much
I was sure of that,
But under that thick smile
Under those thick lies
You never felt anything like you said you did
You never wanted me like you said you did
What you wanted was company
To help you get through the days
To not feel that feeling, loneliness
You were alone, so you found me
To make you happy when he couldn’t
To help you when he couldn’t
To listen to you when he wouldn’t
I was there
I was always there
And dammit I fell so hard for you
It worked, all the lies of wanting me
And now what
You found your way back into his arms
After all we did behind his back
E R A S E D
After all we shared
E R A S E D
After how we loved
E R A S E D
And to go from love to hate so quickly
In an instant
Without any warning
Must be the work of him.
Win Me A Prize // Cranes
I wish you’d escape my mind
As fast as I escaped your heart.
FaceTimed Out
She looks so sweet when you find her
But she’s a bad, bad girl
You wanna believe she’s pure
But she’s the furthest thing from it
So please, don’t make the mistake of thinking
She would change her ways for you.
And You Don’t Even Look Anymore
I first saw you
And I never thought you’d be a part of my life,
Was I lucky to have been so wrong
Or was having you nothing but a curse.
Can I Have A Hug?
I let myself trust you
That was my biggest mistake
I thought we were lock and key
But you tore us to shreds
Making confetti out of my love
And as I hit the floor my mind went numb
You never gave me a chance
To imagine a life without you.
NDE
The sky cries
And I can’t help but miss you in the storm
Hoping the tears will wash away
All my memories of you.
The New Cancer
I was unpacking my belongings when it hit
The gradual slowdown of movements
As I stared at the chipped white wall ahead
I held back that urge to cry
But it stung like a motherfucker
Knowing I’d lost you for good
Knowing I have found myself
Crawling back into bed with Loneliness
The only one who accepts me for me
The only one I’m burdened to live with
Although I choose to love you instead…
Python II
A perfect machine is not put out of working order
Without the interference
Of another variable.
Throat Of The World
Molten ember lust blanketed the cobalt sky
Surrounded by our celestial bodies shining bright
In desire
It was like making love
Being in each other’s presence as we danced
To the moonlight symphony
But earth continued it’s rotation on us
And rotations lead to spins
And spins to distance
And your flare began to fade with time
In a fiery explosion you erupted
Dissolving into stardust
Leaving the sky empty
Leaving my heart voided
Tears stained the starlight dance floor
Who would share this moonlight with me?
So I too froze myself, dying out in a vacant light
And all along the suns
And the cosmos
Constantly sought your return
And all along the suns
And the cosmos
Constantly seek your return.
And You Love This Kind Of Shit
I’ve been entombed in a coffin of loss
I count my breaths in hopes
Of your saving grace once more
Though I know you’ll have me buried in it.
Green Jacket
Seal my eyes
Lock my heart
For I never want to feel this love again
It was the strongest I’d ever felt
So real
Yet to you so fake
The heartbreak after was enough to kill me…
So I let it.
Ants From Up Here
How long can I go
Distracting my mind from you
Before groveling to the gods
For your return.
April Showers
It’s 2:39 in the morning
When I record the time of death
I should be asleep
But She is keeping me up in my head
Our room, so cold and close
We watch together
The last petal fade from Her
And all the while the final grain
Falls from the hourglass making a seemingly
Earth shattering clunk as it hits the bottom
She just wanted to be called Lily
But everyone knew She’d be better off
As Bloodroot.
-I think if I had a back up I’d own like a greenhouse, you know with flowers and stuff.
-Do you remember myyyy favorite flower??
-Of course I do…
Untitled VIII
I was building you a monument
While you were digging me a grave.
Gamora
The fire in our love, born from the dark
Behind the back of an unsuspecting one
Birthed from under the covers
But when the last love left you
I moved
up to take his place
The fire in our love grew dim to your taste
What seemed like love to one
Was only company to the other
We died from under the covers
When you strangled your former lover.
Floral Sundress // Pink Skies
And evermore the sun and the moon
Will still make love to your beautiful skin
Not realizing how lucky they truly are.
Sweethearts <3
And somewhere out there I know
You’re making drunken love to a man
Who only cares about you when he’s not sober.
Cinderella
Every morning I’m sick
Feeling ill and insanely tired
My first thoughts are of you
Probably from that nightmare
I just so happened to wake up from
And it kills my mood and will to live
So I lie here in bed for an hour or two
Thinking of all the ways I used to love you
It only hurts me more
Confuses me more
I can’t understand it
Why you left me so damaged
The way you just disappeared
What did I do to see this side of you?
And when I finally get up to sob in the shower
I dream of all the ways to get you back