“I’m disappointed in you, Ryan. You shouldn’t have told him,” Glen said.
The rest of us looked around at each other like a bunch of lost children witnessing an adult conversation.
“I didn’t show him, Glen. Sarah did.”
Glen shook his head in disappointment.
“You’re going to tell them everything. Everything!”
“Jack,” Glen said.
Jack jumped toward Glen again, but this time Ryan and Haylea were able to step in front of him before he made it to Glen. Kurt tried, but he was a step slow.
“Tell them! Now!”
Glen stared at Jack and knew that he wasn’t going to be able to get out of the house without Jack keeping him there. I could see his eyes change as he accepted his fate.
“Tell them. Now. Everything,” Jack said quieter, but with more anger.
Our new leader pulled a chair out from under the kitchen table and turned it so he could sit down. He fell slowly into the chair as if Jack’s punch hadn’t hit him in the fact, but in the lower back.
“Okay, Jack. You all might want to sit down.”
Some of us took his advice seriously. Kurt sat down on a stool, Haylea stood close behind him. Heather sat down next to Glen whom she was already in love with. I sat down at the kitchen. Ryan and Jack continued to stand far on the other side. Jack was in no mood to sit down and Ryan had to stay close to him in case Jack snapped again.
I’m not from here. I’m originally from Jacksonville, Florida. Raised by a single mother, me and my sister, Sarah, that told Jack what I’m about to tell you. Sarah is the bartender in the pub if you didn’t know. Anyway, my mom couldn’t provide much for us, so I worked my ass off. I was going to get out of the shitty little town I grew up in and the only way to do that was to study, get good grades, get scholarships, go to college, and make a life for myself. I did everything I set out to do. But my mom, who did everything she could for me got sick. I started studying medicine and ways of advancing healthcare, hospital care, surgeries, medicines. I wanted to completely change the way we treated the ill.
After years of hard work, I was named the Chairman of the Department of Biomedical Engineering at JCF- excuse me, the Jacksonville Clinic Foundation. I wanted to help people. After a few years of working, I started concentrating on technology and how rapidly it advanced and improved. I knew that technology was the answer to solving the deficiencies we had in our medical systems. And that led me to nanotechnology. I used specifically nanotech to advance medical practices. Using nanotech, we were able to invent new molecules and to better prevent cancers and other diseases. We were working with groundbreaking information. My clinic was at the front of exciting new technology that was going to eliminate disease. I mean that quite literally. We were going to eliminate every virus, every disease, every cancer…every single sickness. For good.
Soon, Washington D.C. came calling. I was relocated to a new building where I was working with a large staff to further develop this technology. We were going to cure cancer, diabetes. All these diseases could be cured, I cannot reiterate that enough. A world with no sick. As it always does, though, money and funding became an issue. Private organizations wanted to commercialize our products and charge the public for it. Only the top one percent in the world would be able to afford what they wanted to price our product. I refused to have this CureAll product available to only a small, small population of people. So, I lied. We all lied. We said the product wasn’t working and we began our own testing. We took matters into our own hands. Secretly. Only those who needed to know what we were doing knew. Nobody else had any clue. They thought we all but shut down our labs.
After months of testing and dozens of different injection prototypes, we knew what we had to do. We knew the only way to help everybody was to activate a specialized nanobot and put them out before anyone else could stop us. We believed the technology to be perfect. It worked, do you understand that? Testing worked. From Patient Zero all the way to Patient Twelve. Every single patient was cured and finished the trial period in perfect health. So, in order to get the necessary amounts out into the world, we had to move quickly, and it had to be big. We set up locations around the world to prepare for the launch of the device. We set up Districts.
I stared at Glen. The saliva inside of my mouth dried up as he told his story and by the end of it, I needed something to drink. I watched as the rest of their faces looked probably a lot like mine. All except, Jack. He shook his head and stared down at the ground as this was now at least the second time he’d heard this story.
“You did this,” Kurt said.
“You did this?” Heather repeated his words in the form of a question.
“You’re the reason this happened? You’re the reason the world ended?” Haylea asked him in a different way.
“Something went wrong,” Glen said. He stared down at the floor. “The tests worked. It worked. We cured everything.”
“It didn’t work,” Kurt said. We were all in such shock that some of us were saying thoughts out loud.
“No. Something went wrong. When the nanotechnology and the particles reacted with the oxygen, there was a malfunction. It reacted poorly. Nothing we knew about. Nothing we were prepared for.”
I looked at Jack who had already been staring at me. We were able to share many thoughts. I knew he was apologizing. He knew I had accepted. We thought about Sam and Elyse and all the people we loved that would still be with us and safe and sane if Glen and his people had never activated that device. I thought about how much I cared for him and that was the first time we knew we were in love. We didn’t actually say it. But we felt it.
“Can you fix it? Kurt asked. He broke me from my trance and I looked at him. He looked at angry as Jack was minutes earlier.
“It’s almost impossible.” Glen was making sure his glasses weren’t broken from the punch.
“But you can do it?” Haylea asked.
“I might as well say no, because the odds of us doing it…No, it cannot be fixed.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Kurt said.
“If there is a chance,” I interrupted. “No matter how impossible it may seem, you need to do whatever you can to fix it.”
“Listen, please. I know you’re angry. I know this is impossible to hear, but nothing can be done.”
“Tell them why,” Jack said. We looked at him and then back at Glen. Glen must have forgotten that Jack already knew everything. He wasn’t happy to continue sharing.
“The nanotech is still active. Right now, this District is powering a large region of the technology. It is in the air as we speak.”
“And you can shut it off?” Haylea asked. I looked at her. She had hope. Jack still didn’t.
“Yes, but—”
“So, shut it off,” Haylea said.
“Yes, the nanobots are still active, but they are active everywhere.”
“And if you shut them off here…you have to shut them off everywhere, don’t you?” Kurt asked already knowing the answer.
“Yes. That is correct,” Glen said. “In order for the nanotechnology to work and fight disease and cure disease all over the world, stations—districts were set up all over the world. We’d need to shut down each device in each district.”
“Why can’t you just shut it off here? Cure what’s here,” Heather asked. She spoke with such concern for Glen.
“It wouldn’t work.”
“Why not?” Kurt asked.
“It is a failsafe. If a device malfunctions or loses power for whatever reason, the technology is designed to fill in. So, if we shut down our device, the closest district will produce more and fill in our area. It was the perfect creation. We can’t beat it.”
“So, we contact every area and we shut it down. 7-1 is up and running. The others have to be, too, right?” Haylea pointed out.
“No. Right now we have contact with only eleven other stations. All the others are out. Shutting down eleven devices
wouldn’t be worth the effort. There’s too many.”
“How much many districts are there, Glen?” Kurt asked. He stood up slowly much to Haylea’s displeasure. “How many devices are there to shut down?”
Glen looked at Heather and I could see he squeezed her hand. It could have been for numerous reasons, but it looked like he was hoping she’d still care for him after all of this came out. Glen swallowed and looked back at Kurt.
“There are over two-hundred thousand districts. All over the world. In our lifetime, we wouldn’t make a dent.”
Kurt hobbled over, as quick as I’d seen him since he was shot, and punched Glen across the face. It knocked Glen from his chair, but Kurt wasn’t able to put the same force behind his punch as Jack was, so Glen was still conscious. This time Heather thought twice about helping him up, but eventually, she did.
The door shot open and Scott burst into the room.
“Glen, we need to talk,” he shouted.
“Not now!” Haylea yelled at him.
“Glen! Please,” Scott begged.
“Get the hell out of here!” Jack lunged forward, but Ryan held him back and Scott danced around us to the far side behind the island.
“Glen, please. I’m in love with your sister! Okay? I love her.”
Glen was back to his feet with Heather’s arms around him. Glen stared at Scott and couldn’t believe what he was hearing, none of us could. What the hell was going on?
“I’m sorry,” Scott continued. “I’m sorry for everything. That is to everyone, but I’m better! I’m sorry! I love her.”
“Guys,” Haylea said.
“Are you out of your mind?” Glen said to him.
“Guys,” Haylea repeated.
“Glen, please. You saw something good in me. See that now! I love her.”
“Stop saying that!” Glen shouted.
“Will both of you shut up!” Kurt said.
“Guys!” Haylea finally shouted. We all looked her way, but she wasn’t looking at any of us. She was looking across the hall over toward the front door.
Elyse had helped herself into the house. She was standing off to the side with tears in her eyes. Her eyes were red so she’d been crying for a long time. It wasn’t just a quick cry. She must have been sad for hours.
She looked at the whole group through those tears holding a gun and pointing it right at us.
39
Kurt Elkins
A moment. It is a huge word and shouldn’t be taken too lightly. Moments can be big or small. They can be funny or serious or lighthearted or sad. Life is a constant string of them, but there are always a few that we come across that change us as people. Moment after moment we slightly are altered from the people we used to be and changed forever into a newer version of ourselves.
Since the outbreak, it seemed like every moment, big or small, was a life-changing one. Every time we woke up, we dealt with something where we all knew we’d never be the same before. If I ran into an older version of myself, the person I was on the very first day of the outbreak when I was sheltered up in my basement with Clark, I probably wouldn’t even recognize myself. That’s how many moments we’d come face to face with and that is how many of those moments changed us.
Moment number whatever-and-thirty. Elyse standing across the room pointing a gun at all eight of us. I hadn’t seen her in a few weeks and seeing this side of her, I couldn’t imagine what kind of moments she’d run across that left her this way. Of course, I knew what the worst of those moments was for her and we were standing in the room with him.
We’d already just been through a few life-changing moments. I had just come from talking with Father Ricky a few hours ago and was all set to have a wedding tomorrow night. I had just proposed to Haylea and accepted that District 7-1 was our new home. I’d just learn that the reason we were stuck in a post-apocalyptic world with zombies was because of the work of Glen Fuller and the people of District 7-1.
No matter what I, or the others in the room, had just been through, seen, and heard, Elyse pointing a gun at us, one of us, whoever it was, might have been the craziest thing of the night.
“What is going on?” I asked Haylea quietly.
“Elyse, what are you doing?” Emily said. She took a step forward.
“Don’t move!” Elyse shouted.
I looked over to see Jack now standing next to her. He put his hand on her wrist and pulled her back. They connected eyes and Jack let go of her wrist as if he’d never just touched her.
“Elyse,” Jack.
“Shut up, Jack! Shut the hell up!”
“Elyse, what’s going on? Why are you doing this?” I asked. I didn’t know if I should be speaking up, but I was genuinely in the dark and wanted to know what the hell was going on.
“Why?” Elyse asked us. “Why am I doing this?”
“Honey, put the gun down,” Emily said.
“I swear to God if somebody says one more word, I’m going to shoot!” Elyse screamed the end of her sentence. “Have you all forgotten what happened to me?! Have you all forgotten about me?!” She stomped her foot.
I hadn’t forgotten, but at the same time, I hadn’t made it my problem to help her. I had forgotten about her. I simply assumed somebody else was taking care of her. Her mother was there, Jack was there, why should I make it my problem?
“Scott raped me! He fucking raped me and you are all going about your business as if nothing happened to me!”
“Elyse,” Emily started.
“Stop!” Elyse shouted again.
“No! Listen to her,” Jack said.
The look on Elyse’s face did not support Jack speaking up in support of Emily. She aimed the gun at Jack and I felt my heartbeat slowing to an almost nonexistent beat.
“Elyse, she’s tried to help—we have tried to help you. Nobody has forgotten about you. Nobody has been acting like nothing has happened to you. We’ve tried!”
Elyse laughs in almost a maniacal way. She starts swinging the gun around and acting like what she’s doing is just a silly, harmless joke.
“Oh, you tried. But I’m too crazy to understand, right? I’m too much of a lost cause. I’ve lost my fucking mind! I’m too fucking crazy to understand! You can’t help me. Isn’t that right, Jack?”
“Elyse, we were worried about you,” Emily said.
“Bullshit! You were worried about yourself. You were worried about him!” She pointed at Jack with her other hand. Now a finger and a gun were aimed at one man among us.
I watched Jack. He looked calm but wasn’t taking his eyes off of the barrel of the gun.
“It wasn’t about me, mom. It was about him. But he’s not the problem. Jack is just my hero, right?”
“Elyse,” Jack started.
Elyse slowly lowered her hand and then scanned the opening of that gun across the room. She moved all the way to the far end and pointed it at me. I was the problem?
She laughed.
She moved the gun back in the other direction and stopped at somebody we all knew was the problem and somebody that we probably couldn’t protect.
The gun was aimed at Scott and Elyse’s eyebrows became very straight.
“Elyse,” Scott said.
“I don’t think you should be speaking, Scotty. And if you say my name again, if my name comes out from your mouth one more time, I’m going to replace those words with a bullet.” She spoke with such evil.
“Elyse, don’t do this,” I said. Haylea nudged me, but I had to do something. “I promise you, if you kill him, it isn’t going to help. It’s just going to make you feel worse.”
“I don’t think it will,” she responded. She didn’t take her eyes off of him.
“He’s right,” Jack said. “I killed some people out of revenge and I don’t stop thinking about it. We’ve all been through some bad shit out here, but that can all stop. You don’t need to do this.”
“He raped me!” She screamed. I hadn’t heard anyone scream that loud. “You�
��ve been through bad shit? He raped me!”
“I know he did, baby,” Emily said. There were tears now.
“You keep claiming you’re this little family. All you do is sit around and talk and have these little meetings, but nobody talks to me. Nobody asks me what I think. Haylea, when was the last time you just sat down and talked to me?”
The gun was still pointed at Scott, but here beady eyes drilled a hole into Haylea’s eyes.
Haylea had no response. She couldn’t find any words to make the situation better.
“I’m so glad he raped me,” she said. She dropped her arm and started laughing with her head rolling around her shoulders. Jack made a small step forward, but Elyse focused on him and he stopped.
“I’m so glad he raped me. Now I see everyone for who they truly are. Scott’s not a monster. He was just alone. He was afraid and he needed comfort from me.”
“Put the gun down, Elyse,” Emily said.
“He’s not the monster. You’re the monster. You’re all the monsters.” She looked at us all again and started moving the gun back and forth. “You’re the worst of all of them.”
Jack stared at her with the same calmness he always has. I could see him trying to concoct a way out of this situation. He was a quick thinker and quicker on his feet, but anything he did put the rest of us in jeopardy and he knew that. That’s why he wasn’t doing anything at all.
“Jack, my dad just died. My dad—her husband just fucking died! And now you’re fucking her!”
“Elyse, calm down,” Jack said with his hands up.
“You chose her! Why didn’t you choose me? I needed you! Fuck these people, I needed you! I chose you! Why couldn’t you choose me? Why didn’t you love me?” More of those tears were falling.
“I do love you, Elyse. I care about you so much. You mean so much to me,” Jack said.
“I just wanted you to love me. I just wanted you to protect me.” She wasn’t listening to Jack anymore. “You could have stopped me from getting hurt, Jack. I needed you to care for me.”
“Elyse, I tried to help you. I would do anything for you and you need to know that.”
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